


Fervor

by CarolPeletier



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Smut, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Hurt/Comfort, Season 1, Season 2, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-07
Updated: 2020-08-21
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:02:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 54
Words: 114,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23534998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CarolPeletier/pseuds/CarolPeletier
Summary: Carol waits until everyone's asleep to take her shower at the CDC. Daryl has the same idea. Two lost souls find each other in the middle of the night and take each other by surprise.
Relationships: Daryl Dixon/Carol Peletier
Comments: 253
Kudos: 303





	1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own nothing from The Walking Dead. All characters are property of the creators of the graphic novels and television series.

Fervor

One

She waited until the last rumblings of giddy laughter and muted moans from the separate rooms in the basement of the CDC had quieted to pure silence. She tucked Sophia’s doll under the sleeping girl’s arm and slipped out of bed, padding barefoot down the hall to the bathrooms. She’d found a long sleeping gown that looked about fifteen years old, but it was soft enough it would be comfortable to sleep in. She carried it under one arm as she crept into the bathroom.

She was careful to step over the puddles on the concrete floor. She looked around anxiously before raising her shirt over her head and unclasping her bra. She gasped when a light in the corner flickered and buzzed, and she brought her hand to her pale chest. Her heart was beating a mile a minute. She looked around again. There were only two shower stalls, but as she stepped into the one, she realized somebody, probably in a drunken stupor, had broken the faucet handle. She shivered and quickly discarded her pants and underwear before draping them over a bench with the rest of her clothes.

She passed by a mirror beaded with droplets of condensation, and she saw the days old bruises dotting her ribcage from where Ed had shoved her. She grimaced and looked away before slipping into the shower stall. She shut the door behind her and turned the water on. It was cold at first, but it warmed up quite nicely. She slipped under the stream and shivered until the warm water slipped down her neck and back and the stall began to fill with steam.

The shampoo smelled good, and closed her eyes and smiled when she held the bottle to her nose. It was a luxury she’d missed. There were more important things to worry about now, certainly, but it was nice to take a moment and breathe. They had four walls and a roof, and as claustrophobic as she got sometimes, it was nice to not have to worry about sleeping with one eye open. 

She washed her hair first, massaging her scalp to wash away the sweat and dirt and flecks of blood she knew she carried around with her, and then she took her time washing her body, passing the soapy cloth over her tender bruises first before washing between her legs and under her arms. She winced when she turned to put the soap down, placing her hand on her side, counting herself lucky Ed hadn’t bruised one of her ribs.

He was gone, finally out of her life as she’d wished for a hundred times over. She hadn’t shed one tear over him. The only tears she’d shed were of anger when she’d slammed that pickax down into his skull. She knew it was wrong, but she imagined doing it when he was still alive, still cognizant of who was killing him. She couldn’t count the number of times she’d imagined how she’d do it. Slit his throat while he slept. A gun against a pillow to stifle the shot? Poison in his breakfast cereal? The only thing that had stopped her had been the knowledge that if she did it, she’d never see her daughter again. The hate she felt for Ed had been strong, but the love for her daughter was much stronger.

She huffed out a breath and shook her head, rubbing her hands over her face as she tried to wash away the memories of Ed. He was the past, and while the future was uncertain, at least she was alive. It was a start.

The longer she stood under the water, the more she let her mind wander to other things that certainly shouldn’t be priority but were prominent in _her_ mind. Like hearing her daughter’s laughter for the first time in so long. She and Carl had played a game of checkers in the common room after supper, and for a few minutes, it was like the world hadn’t ended, and she was truly a kid again. And then there was something else. 

All through supper, she’d sat quietly, listening to the excited chatter of the other survivors. There’d been a buzz of hope in the air, but Carol had noticed the doctor had been awfully quiet. Dr. Jenner had eaten in silence, studying them all like they were rats in a maze. Of course, she couldn’t blame him. They were probably the first people he’d spoken to in weeks. Still, Dr. Jenner had retired from the table first, leaving everyone to eat and drink before meandering off to sleep or shower or fuck.

Carol remembered one particular set of eyes meeting her gaze on more than one occasion. She remembered watching him, the normally brash, hot-headed Daryl Dixon who had ruffled a few of Rick Grimes’ feathers on more than one occasion in the past few days. He was quiet until he had something to say. But tonight, he’d had his eye on her. She wasn’t sure why. She’d sat there sipping her second glass of wine when he finished off a third beer and pushed back from his chair, leveling a lingering look at her that was something between a gaze and a glare. Whatever it was, her face had gone red, and she’d quickly urged Sophia to finish her supper and excused them both from the room.

But now, in the quiet as the warm water cascaded down her body, she couldn’t help but think about the way her skin had prickled, the way her heart had beaten a little faster, how there was a dull throbbing between her legs. She hadn’t experienced that kind of desire in a long time, and it had caught her off guard.

She shivered under the warm water, and her body began to respond as her mind wandered, and just after she cut the water off and prepared to leave the shower before her mind got too carried away, she heard the distinct squeal of the door on its hinges. 

She froze, her hand on the faucet handle. She heard the distinct sound of bare feet padding against wet concrete, and then she jumped at the slam of the other stall door followed by a gruff curse word. And before she could think or do anything, her stall door opened. She was met with the shocked expression of a very naked Daryl Dixon. 

_“Shit_ ,” he hissed under his breath, grabbing a towel to cover his half-erect dick. It was too late. She’d already gotten an eyeful, and her face was probably as red as the cloth he held over his groin, but she didn’t move. Oddly enough, neither did he. His face was red, partly from embarrassment, partly from the drinking, but the way his gaze passed down her naked form showed he was sober enough. “What’re you doin’?”

“What am I doing? I’m taking a shower. What are you doing?”

“Didn’t hear no water.”

“I was done,” she huffed out. Daryl was standing in the doorway. She could either brush past him to get out, or he could step out of the way, but they both stood there staring at each other. She noticed the way his chest was marked with scars. Even his shoulders had curved scars that she imagined extended onto his back. 

The way his gaze continued down her pale belly, marked with pale lines, down between her legs had her knees trembling. 

“Done?” he asked, dragging his gaze back up to her face in time to see her bite her bottom lip. She opened her mouth to speak but said nothing. Instead, she shook her head. “No?” He narrowed his eyes at her, and he noticed her own gaze was trailing down his chest and toward his stomach. His face flushed red when her cool blue eyes met his again. 

She’d spent so many years being told what to do and when to do it, being told she was worthless and undesirable, and now she was standing naked in front of a man, and instead of feeling like a prop, she felt alive. Her blood felt on fire, and sparks of electricity scorched a trail up and down her spine. 

She took a step toward him, and he took a step back, but he didn’t move out of the way. Instead, he watched her reach for his towel. He hadn’t expected this. She’d been so quiet and meek back at the camp. Even at supper, she’d barely said much of anything except to Lori or to her kid. And now she was looking at him with something in her eyes he hadn’t seen from anyone in a long time. Was it need? Desire? Longing? Hunger? Whatever it was, she was taking that red towel in her hand and tossing it aside. His cock twitched, and he took a step toward her, thinking her resolve would crumble. It didn’t. Instead, she brought her hand to his chest, feeling the coarse hair under her gentle fingertips. 

“What are you doin’?” he asked, narrowing his eyes at her again. This time, she spoke without words, letting her hands do the talking. She brought one hand down around his hip and the other curled around his cock, gripping him at the base before sliding upward. He sucked in a sharp breath, clenching his teeth before involuntarily bucking his hips against her hand. “Fucking _Christ_.” He groaned then, pawing at her hips, bringing her closer. 

She didn’t kiss him. Instead, she buried her face against his neck, sucking lightly where she could feel his pulse hammering against her lips. As she pumped her hand around him, he dug his fingers into her hips, gripping her firmly until he realized he might be holding her too hard. He softened his hold on her, and she pulled back to look at him. The fire that flashed in his eyes made her core throb. He gruffed out a low groan before pushing her back against the shower door. He looked her straight in the eye, a little bolder thanks to the few drinks he’d had at dinner. And then his hands slipped between her legs. She gasped and squeezed her thighs around his wrist as he touched her, fingers clumsy and fumbling, but when he brushed against her clit, her mouth fell open in a whimper. She squeezed her eyes shut and stroked him a little faster, feeling his cock pulse against her palm. 

Another little growl escaped his throat, and he pulled his hand out from between her legs. She whimpered then, and when his lips pressed against her throat, she arched backward. His hand, slick with her fluids, brushed over her breast, teasing a pert nipple with his thumb before he leaned down and sucked it between his lips. She cried out, and her nails bit at his shoulders as his teeth and tongue teased the little bud. Her fingers gripped him a little more firmly, and she ran her thumb over the head before stroking downward again. He was panting, his breath hot against her skin, and when he pulled back from her breast and straightened to look at her, and he tugged her against him. She looked up at him, her lips parted, her eyes searching his, but in a moment, he looked over, searching for something, and when he apparently found it, he tugged at her hand and brought her over to the marble countertop of the bathroom sink.

“Daryl,” she moaned, as he lifted her up to sit before immediately bringing his hand back down between her legs. She was throbbing, dripping for him, and his nostrils flared when he caught her scent. His pupils were large and dark, and when he leaned in, she swore he was going to kiss her. Instead, he gripped her hips and pulled her ass toward the edge. He took his cock in his hand, gave it a couple of tugs and then he slid into her, fast and hard. She reached back, gripping the side of the mirror and the paper towel dispenser for purchase. Daryl pulled out before slamming back in, and she bit her lip to keep from crying out. His face was red, his eyes were dark and focused on hers, and for as rough and abrasive as he’d been in the weeks she’d known him, she still hadn’t expected him to be so damn ravenous. It had been a long time for him. She could tell. Maybe longer than it’d been for her. And when his fingers tightened on her hips, she pulled her arms around his neck and slid closer to take him in deeper.

“Fuck,” she cried out, burying her cries against his neck. “Yes. Unh…. _harder_.” She bit down against his shoulder, and his own groans threatened to wake the whole group. She reached up and clamped a hand over his mouth for a moment, and he let out something between a snort and a laugh before pulling out completely. “No…don’t stop. Please!” 

“C’mere,” he grunted, helping her down from the counter. She followed him over to the bench where her clothes were strewn, and he nodded toward it before turning her hips in his hands. She realized what he wanted and turned her back to him, bending down over the bench as he pressed up against her from behind. She bit her lip to mute the low moan when he slid in slowly this time, filling her, letting her walls stretch around him again. She gasped at the sensation, and when he reached around and slid his hand down her belly and between her thighs, she nearly lost control. 

His fingers slipped against her clit again, and he thrust into her faster and harder. Her hands were white knuckling the bench, and as he pushed into her, she squeezed her eyes shut tight. She clenched around him, gasping as an intense orgasm tore through her. His mouth was on her neck then, and his hand moved up to squeeze a breast, teasing and rolling the nipple between his slick fingertips.

His tongue was hot and wet against her skin, and she desperately wanted to taste his lips. Still, she couldn’t get enough of his hands on her and the way he filled her so perfectly, how her body stretched around him and how he was doing that thing with his tongue on the back of her neck.

“Fuck. Daryl…I’m… _ohhhh…_ ” Her thighs began to tremble, and as her walls pulsed around him through another orgasm, he let go. He spilled into her, thrusting through his own orgasm until he was spent. He huffed and panted, running his hand down the back of her neck and over her sweat-slick back. He pulled out of her then, and she straightened up, nearly tripping over her own feet when she turned to face him. His chest was heaving, and his hair was slicked down with sweat against his forehead. He brushed it back with his forearm and suddenly looked uncertain of what to do or where to go. So, Carol made the decision for him. She reached for her dirty clothes and tossed them into the bin with everyone else’s, and she slipped the long sleeping gown over her slender frame. She looked back at him, uncertain if they needed to speak or hug or kiss or just be on their way, and when his gaze fell to her feet, she swallowed hard and turned to leave.

She stopped just shy of leaving, and turned just as he started to shut the shower stall door. His gaze zeroed in on hers, and a half smile tugged at his lips. 

“Good night,” she whispered. He nodded at her, a little half grunt escaping his lips, and then she turned and fled, her heart still pounding and her thighs still shaking, and all she could wonder was if tomorrow she’d wake up and it would all be a dream.

_Author's Note: This idea sort of came to me today. I hope you'll enjoy it! Please let me know what you think! I do plan on continuing this one. Feedback is always appreciated!_


	2. Chapter 2

_Two_

_We almost died today. Jacqui_ _did_ _die today. And Andrea almost…_

The words kept rattling around in Carol’s head, and the unsettling anxiety that knotted in the pit of her stomach kept her awake. She was emotionally and physically exhausted. Dr. Jenner had very nearly killed everybody in their group. They’d clawed their way through the end of the world to survive, to get to the CDC only to find that Dr. Jenner’s last shred of hope had died and what he called their extinction event had already been set in motion.

She had held Sophia close and sobbed and begged Jenner to let them go. 

_“My daughter doesn’t deserve to die like this!”_

She’d felt weak. Powerless. Maybe even more than when Ed had made her feel that way. She’d prided herself on protecting her daughter at all costs, hiding the bruises and the beatings as best she could. Sophia wasn’t dumb. She knew her father was a bad man. And Carol still felt guilty that she’d never found the strength to leave him for good. She hated that she hadn’t been able to do that for Sophia.

Every bit of her ached. She’d been running on pure adrenaline since the CDC, and now that she was idle, she was beginning to feel everything. Most of all, she kept thinking about the moment she’d handed Rick that grenade. That was what was currently keeping her awake. She wasn’t sure why it hadn’t dawned on her that she had that weapon until that very last possible moment. Whether it was luck or God or fate, she was grateful she’d done it. If she hadn’t, they’d all be dead. 

She sighed and turned on her back. The floor was uncomfortable, and the stench of the dead haunted the room. It was cleared out, but the old nursing home was in such a sad state when they’d arrived that it had been impossible to clear out all of the bodies. Everybody crashed as soon as they had their meager supper of garbanzo beans, and Carol felt certain she was the only one awake, mind still reeling, with the exception of Glenn who had taken first watch downstairs.

She sat up, leaning over to see Sophia was sleeping soundly with her doll tucked under her arm. Carol tugged Sophia’s blanket up over and peered around the room. Lori and Rick were huddled in one corner with Carl, while Andrea, Shane and T-Dog spread out in another. Dale, who Carol had been hearing complain of a terrible pain in his back, was lying on an uncomfortable pew they’d dragged down from the chapel.

She suddenly felt like the walls were pressing in on her. She took a slow, steady breath, but the air in the stuffy room was growing thicker. She stood then, carefully stepping over Sophia and a couple of their packs. She stepped over T-Dog’s outstretched arm, narrowly missing his fingers by half an inch. She started for the door but stopped in her tracks when she saw the figure leaning back against the wall in the shadows. His crossbow was lying across his lap, and she could tell by the steady rise and fall of his chest that he was sleeping, or at least damn near close. 

They hadn’t spoken since last night. A few glances at breakfast and a chance encounter in the hallway that almost led to conversation but was interrupted by Glenn stumbling, still hung over, toward the bathroom. Then, when they’d arrived at the nursing home after narrowly escaping with their lives, Daryl, running on fear and adrenaline, had snapped about keeping Sophia quiet when the girl had started to cry. Carol had hissed at him to leave her alone, and they’d shared a look, but that had been it. 

Hell, she didn’t know what to say or if she should say anything. They’d barely said more than a handful of sentences to each other since meeting. All she knew about him was that he had an asshole brother with a drug problem, and being with him in the damp CDC shower room had been the most pleasurable sexual experience she’d had in her entire forty years of life.

A shiver ran down her spine, and she quickly snapped out of it, forcing herself to move carefully across the room so she wouldn’t disturb anyone. She paused in the doorway, casting a glance down at Daryl. He didn’t move, but she heard a soft sigh escape his lips. She didn’t know what she was expecting. It wasn’t like they’d cuddled after. They’d scratched an itch and went about their separate ways. That was it.

She gently closed the door behind her and made her way down the corridor with only the moonlight to guide her way. She was careful to step over the strewn corpses, and she made her way into one of the rooms. It was void of death and the bed was still made with hospital corners. Unused. Forgotten. 

She put her hand against her throat and closed her eyes before taking in a deep breath to steady her anxieties. She hadn’t even felt this claustrophobic at the CDC. Maybe it was because there had been a fleeting glimmer of hope that they could live out the rest of their lives with the safety of those walls around them. Only, that had come to a crashing halt the second Jenner had locked them inside. Now, they were alive and free but still trapped inside with a bunch of corpses while the dead outside roamed and waited for food. Waited for them.

It was too much. She hurried to the window and pried it open, gasping as the cool night air hit her face and filled her lungs. She breathed it in and leaned her forehead against the cool window pane before hoisting it up a little further. She looked down below, spotting a few of dead passing through on an aimless quest for the next bite of flesh.

“What’re you doin’?” She jumped at the gruff voice, and she turned at the window to see Daryl standing there in the doorway, his crossbow in hand. She flinched and crossed her arms across her chest. 

“I…needed some air.” Daryl stepped into the room and shut the door. He placed his crossbow down in the corner and took a few steps over to the window. She watched as the moonlight illuminated his muscular arms. He was tight lipped, as if chewing over the words he didn’t know he should say. She turned her attention back to the window, and then she felt him shift beside her.

“You ok?” His voice was low and rough, and Carol hugged her arms to herself and managed a small smile.

“You asking for me or for you?” She glanced up at him, and he looked away. 

“M’sorry. Didn’t mean to snap like I did. Your little girl was scared.”

“We were all scared. We’re still scared.” She shivered, and Daryl glanced at the window. 

“You cold?” He reached up to shut the window, but Carol reached up and put her hand on his arm. 

“No, please. It feels good.” Daryl looked down at Carol’s warm hand on his arm, and she watched him tense. She pulled her hand away, and Daryl took a step back. “Sorry.”

“For what?” he asked.

“I don’t know. You looked…I don’t know.” She shrugged and bit back the urge to cry, and she wasn’t sure why. 

“You should get some sleep,” he said quietly. “Who knows what’s gonna happen tomorrow? Better rest up.”

“Who knows?” she echoed. She looked down, and she let out something of a dry laugh. When she forced herself to look at him again, her shoulders slumped. “We almost died today.” Daryl chewed the inside of his cheek and nodded. “We almost died .” She took a shaking breath and looked skyward with tears in her eyes. “We don’t know what happens tomorrow.” She took a step toward him, and his breath hitched in his chest. “Right?”

“Mmhmm.” She watched him swallow hard when she placed her hands on his arms. 

“Would you…” Her resolve crumbled, and she flinched, taking her hands away. 

“What?” he asked. She shook her head. “Tell me.” She shook her head again, and he took a step toward her. She looked up. The moonlight bathed them in a hazy blue glow, and Daryl looked at her with equal parts lust and concern. She wasn’t used to men looking at her like that. She’d spent her entire marriage avoiding the looks of other men, so she honestly couldn’t be certain how they’d looked at her. All she knew in this moment was that his normally tense jaw softened, and his hand came up to brush against her arm. “Hey.” She dragged her gaze up to his. “Show me.”

She let go of the breath she didn’t realize she’d been holding, and she leaned in to bury her face against his chest, breathing him in. Daryl’s hands moved up her back then, and she pulled back to let her fingers work his buttons loose. Daryl looked down, watching her trembling fingers work, and when she slid the shirt down his arms, he pulled her close, groaning when she pressed her mouth against the center of his chest. A little groan left his lips, and Carol’s hands moved around to caress his back. She felt the ridges of his scars for the first time, and he flinched, but he didn’t pull back. Carol pressed a kiss to his shoulder, and he dug his fingers into her hips. She gasped when he pulled her close, and then his hands tugged her shirt over her head, revealing the lacy white bra underneath. Even in the moonlight, he could make out the bruises dotting her robs, bruises that hadn’t deterred her at all the night before. Tonight, however, he traced his hands up her waist, his calloused fingers gentle as Carol stepped forward. He stepped backward until he came to sit on the edge of the bed. 

Carol straddled his legs then, staring down at him, gently playing with the hair at the back of his neck. She wanted to kiss him, but it almost felt too intimate. Kisses were something for sweethearts. That’s not what they were, was it? She couldn’t even remember the last time Ed had kissed her. She couldn’t remember the last time she enjoyed a kiss that left her wanting more. And Daryl looked up at her, leaning in as if reading her thoughts, but instead, she buried her face against his neck and let his hands wander over her back and her ass. She moaned softly when he pressed soft kisses between her breasts, kneading one with his palm through the fabric of her bra. He dragged the cups down and pulled a pert nipple between his teeth, giving it a gentle nibble before wrapping his lips around it. She gasped at the sensation, reaching behind her back to unclasp it. She tugged the garment off, but before Daryl could explore her further, she backed away. 

His mouth opened in a silent protest, until he realized she was slipping off her pants. He tugged at the button on his own jeans, and he worked quickly to strip them off before passing one fleeting glance over at the closed door with no lock, hoping to god nobody walked in.

She came back to him, the moonlight glinting off of her bare form, and he lay there staring at her for a moment, his hand curling around the base of his dick. He gave it a few tugs, and his nostrils flared as she crawled over him, her scent filling the air. His head fell back against the mattress, and Carol pressed kisses along his collarbones and his neck. 

“Fuck,” he panted, as she took his hand and brought it between them, guiding him between her legs. His fingers twitched against her thigh before he began to rub her, gathering up the slick moisture at her core and stroking upward to tease her clit. 

“Ohhhh, yeah,” she panted, grinding against his hand. “Oh God….” She was panting as he pushed two fingers up into her, stroking her slowly as her walls fluttered around him. “Oh!” He reached up to pressed a finger to her lips.

“Best be quiet, or this’ll be over ‘fore it starts.” He nodded toward the door, and Carol suddenly remembered that Glenn was still awake and on watch. Carol nodded and bit her lip, and Daryl took the opportunity to grip her hips and flip her onto her back. She moaned softly, and he gripped her legs behind the knees, bringing her legs up over his shoulders. She bit back a moan when he pressed open mouthed kisses to her stomach and then to her breasts. She wanted his to go lower again, to keep going, but she wasn’t used to asking for what she wanted and getting it. Instead, she brought one hand up to caress his chest, and her other hand moved between her legs, slipping through her folds. She slipped two fingers inside slowly before pulling them away and reaching for his dick. He groaned, thrusting his hips against her hand as she stroked him. 

“Fuck,” he bit out, reaching down to slip his dick between her folds, teasing her clit with the head before pressing against her opening. 

“Daryl,” she panted. “Please. Oh, please…” Her hands fell down against the mattress, gripping the sheets as he slipped into her slowly, stretching her. She writhed beneath him, panting and whimpering as the ache of being filled overpowered her. “Yes…oh fuck.” He held himself up then, pressing his palms down into the mattress as he began to move. He watched her head fall back and her mouth open, and her beautiful breasts rocked with each motion. He bent down to suck at the hollow of her throat, and her hands moved down his back and over his ass, gripping him there to urge him to keep going. 

Her walls were hot and slick around him, tight and fluttering in the most delicious way. He wasn’t going to last, and she was so close, and he figured finishing fast would be in both of their best interests tonight. 

He pulled out of her then, and Carol whimpered when he slammed back in. Her eyes flew open, and he realized he’d gone too deep. He started to slow, but Carol whined. 

“Please don’t stop. Please.” She was begging him, and the room felt like it was spinning. He was close. He felt like a tight coil about to snap, but he didn’t want to stop until she…

Her pussy clenched around him like a vise, and he buried his own moans against her neck as her body trembled through the orgasm. He kept pushing, thrusting faster until he finally let go. 

He pulled out then, panting as he flopped back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling as he panted for air. Carol shifted next to him, and then she was up and looking for her clothes. He watched her for a moment. She turned to see him watching her, his chest still rising and falling in stunted breaths. 

She dressed faster than she ever had in her life, not knowing what to say or do. All she knew was if she didn’t leave soon, somebody might wake up and wonder where she was. Where they were.

“I’ll go back first,” she whispered. She slipped her shoes back on and straightened, and he slowly sat up on the bed, his dick still half hard and flagging against his belly.

“Yeah,” he muttered. “Ok.”

“They’ll wonder where we are.” She wasn’t sure why she felt the need to explain, but the way he was looking at her made her feel like maybe she should. Spending the night in his arms wasn’t the worst idea she’d ever heard, but did he even want that? She didn’t know how this was supposed to work. And he was right before. They needed to get some sleep. There wasn’t time to wax poetic about this situation, whatever it was. It was time to rest, because tomorrow was so uncertain. They’d be lucky if they had a roof over their heads come tomorrow night. 

He got up then, fumbling around for his clothes, and when he straightened again, he huffed out a breath and pulled his jeans up, tucking himself back inside before doing up the button. He looked at her then, and for a moment, she wondered if he was angry with her. Or was he angry at himself? 

“You ok?” she asked, reaching out to touch his arm. He stiffened for a moment, before he raised his eyes to hers and nodded.

“Yeah. You?”

“Yeah.” She managed a weak smile, and Daryl followed suit with one of his own. “Okay. Goodnight, Daryl.”

“G’night.” She turned and hurried out of the room, being careful and quiet as she made her way back to her sleeping bag on the floor. Minutes later, Daryl returned, sitting back down and leaning against the wall the way he’d been when Carol had left the room. She turned to face him, and though neither of them could see the other’s face through the darkness, Carol was certain he was staring. Despite the uncertainty of tomorrow, Carol fell asleep with a smile.

_Author’s Note: Thanks for reading guys! Please let me know your thoughts. Feedback is always appreciated!_


	3. Chapter 3

Three

The scorching sun made for absolutely miserable traveling conditions, and when the group came upon a traffic snarl on the Interstate, they had no choices to get out of the vehicles and search for supplies. With Rick and Shane’s help, Carl and Sophia were put up on the roof of Dale’s RV on lookout duty while the adults started pulling clothes and food and other supplies out of the other cars on the road.

Glenn and Shane had found a water truck and were transferring large jugs of water from the truck and into the back of Carol’s Jeep Cherokee. Carol had started rummaging through suitcases to find clothes. With no hope of the world going back to what it once was, Winter was sure to be brutal that first year.

She kept her eyes up, looking out for danger and knowing with certainty that should one of those monsters come at her, she had no way to defend herself. She’d never shot a gun. She knew a knife could cause damage, but if a walker got close enough to her that she could _attempt_ to put a blade through its skull, she knew she’d be as good as dead. And somehow, she was supposed to protect her daughter in this world. She wasn’t ready. But, really, who was?

There was a particularly heavy suitcase with a latch that wouldn’t budge, and when she tugged at it, it barely moved. She heard feet scuffling behind her, and she gasped, turning quickly to see Daryl moving toward her. She placed her hand to her chest and felt her heart racing beneath her fingertips. 

“Need some help?”

“Yeah, this one’s heavy. Might have something good in it.”

“Might be a body,” Daryl pointed out, staring at the big piece of luggage. Carol frowned then, and Daryl reached in to try to tug it out. He didn’t have much luck, and he didn’t think it was worth the effort or his energy. Carol watched him walk over to the back of Carol’s Jeep, and he grabbed an ax out. He brought it over and made quick work of breaking the latch. Carol flinched when the blade hit the metal latch, but it popped open, and Carol leaned in to open the lid.

“Daryl, look,” Carol murmured. Inside were several guns. Handguns, rifles and boxes of ammo. 

“Jesus,” he muttered. He glanced around, and then he looked at Carol. “Wanna help me with these?”

“Ok,” she agreed. “Should we put them in the RV with the others?

“Nah,” he said with a little shake of his head. “Take one for you.” He handed her one, and she held the barrel between her thumb and forefinger. Daryl smirked. “It ain’t gonna bite ya.”

“I’ve never held a gun much less shot one,” Carol admitted. She chanced a blushing glance at him. “Would you teach me?” He pressed his hands against the back bumper of the car, and he risked a long gaze that moved down her slender neck and down the front of her blouse. Carol’s face reddened, and she put the gun back into the suit case. Daryl cleared his throat then, and he wiped the sweat from his brow before straightening. 

“Yeah. I could teach you, but you’d probably learn better from somebody like Rick or Shane.”

“I don’t trust Shane,” Carol said quietly. “And Rick’s got his own to look after. You’re a hunter. You know how to shoot. I’ve seen you handle a gun.” Daryl nodded then, and he cleared his throat. 

“Alright. Help me get these to the Jeep.” Carol nodded then, and just as she took a shotgun in her hands, Andrea came walking up.

“Holy shit. You hit the jackpot.” She wiped the sweat from her brow with the back of her hand, and she reached in to grab a gun for herself. Carol glanced at Daryl who looked more than annoyed, but neither of them said anything. “Taking these to the RV with the others?” 

“Yeah,” Daryl muttered. “Might as well.” Andrea grabbed a couple of shotguns and started for the RV. Carol chanced a glance at Daryl, and he grabbed the small handgun Carol had been looking at before. He tucked it into the back of his jeans and glanced at Carol before loading his arms up with some ammo and weapons. It only took two trips for the three of them to get everything back to the RV, and when Carol placed the rest of it with the duffel bag full of guns, she brushed her hands over the front of her shirt and watched Andrea step back out of the RV. Daryl started to squeeze past her to grab a box of bullets, and as he did so, she nearly bumped right into him. 

She held her breath as their bodies touched, and he placed a steady hand on her arm and looked down at her, his face just inches from hers. She blushed, her face almost unbearably hot. 

“Sorry.”

“Sorry.” 

Carol chuckled as they bumped into each other again in Daryl’s attempt to get past. She finally managed to squeeze past him, and she took a step outside of the sweltering RV just in time to see Sophia climbing down the back of the RV.

“Sophia?” Sophia jumped the last couple of feet. “Sophia! What are you doing?” Carol hurried over to her daughter. “I told you to stay up there.”

“I have to go to the bathroom,” Sophia insisted. Carol sighed and nodded before pointing toward the RV door. Sophia hurried up to climb the steps, ducking under Daryl’s arm as they passed in the doorway. Daryl glanced back at Sophia and then out at Carol.

“She ok?” he asked. Carol nodded and she took a step over toward a nearby car and started to rummage through it. Daryl stayed close by, poking through the trunk of another nearby car. When Carol found a pretty red top and held it up for size, she looked up to see Daryl staring at her, and when she caught him, he looked away and rubbed the back of his neck. She couldn’t help but smile a little, but before she had a chance to say anything, Carl whistled from the top of the RV. 

“Walkers!” he hissed as quietly as he could but loudly enough to get Daryl’s attention. 

“Shit,” Daryl bit out. “C’mon.” He rushed over, taking Carol’s wrist in his hand. He looked right at the RV, but just when he started for it, a walker came passing right along the backside of it. Daryl quickly pulled Carol around the side of it, getting to his knees and scurrying under, guiding her toward the center, keeping his hand on the gun in the back of his pants just in case.

“Sophia,” Carol whimpered, feeling the RV rock above her as Sophia started out of the bathroom. “Sophia!” 

“Shhh,” Daryl urged, placing his finger over his lips and reaching over her back and around to place his hand over her mouth. “Gotta stay quiet.” Carol trembled, biting back any bit of noise that threatened to escape her throat. Daryl brought his hand away from her mouth, and she buried her face against her arm, shaking as she heard Sophia’s frightened cries. 

Every moment since those two lines showed up on the pregnancy test seemed to flash through Carol’s mind, and the shuffling feet coming around the RV from what seemed like every direction had her blood running cold.

Blinking through her tears, she saw Lori and Andrea under a nearby car, both horrified by whatever it was they were witnessing. Carol closed her eyes again, praying her little girl would somehow be ok. But when she heard two feet hit the pavement followed by frantic cries, she realized Sophia had gotten out. 

“Sophia,” she cried, clawing at the asphalt, desperately trying to get out from beneath the RV. Daryl kept his arm around her middle, keeping her still until the walkers were gone, seemingly following Sophia wherever she’d gone off to.

“Alright. C’mon.” He crawled out from under the RV and reached under to help Carol get out. 

“Sophia!” she cried, louder this time as the other survivors came out of their hiding places. Lori and Andrea hurried over, and Carol, shaking, looked at them. “Did you…did you see her?”

“She went down there,” Andrea choked out. “They were right behind her. She took off, and…”

“Oh God. No. Sophia!” Daryl came rushing over, crossbow slung over his shoulder, and he took Andrea aside. 

“You gotta get her in there. She’s gonna draw more of ‘em right back here. I’m goin’ after the girl.”

“I’m going, too,” Carl called from atop the RV. Daryl shook his head.

“You stay here. I work better on my own.” He turned his gaze back to Carol who was hugging her arms around herself, doubling over. Lori and Andrea were practically holding her up. “I’m gonna find her, alright? Nobody’s gettin’ left behind. Not on my watch. You hear me?” Carol just squeezed her eyes shut and choked out a sob as Lori and Andrea helped her back to the RV. 

_Author’s Note: Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed it. More to come soon! Feedback is appreciated!_


	4. Chapter 4

Four

“I should’ve gone with him. I should’ve…” Rick ran his fingers through his hair as Lori clung to his arm. 

“Daryl knows what he’s doing. He’d go off for days when we were at the quarry,” Lori assured him. “He works better on his own, like he said.” She rubbed his back, and she pressed a tight mouthed kiss to his shoulder. “He’s gonna find her.” 

Carol leaned over the guardrails, and the metal creaked under her hands. Her tears had dried up about an hour ago, and her eyes felt like they were full of sand. She stood staring down into the darkness, down where Sophia had gone, where the walkers had followed, where Daryl had gone to try to bring her home.

“I didn’t hear gunshots,” Carol murmured. 

“What?” Lori asked.

“He had a gun. He could have used it.”

“No,” Rick said, shaking his head. “He knows just as well as the rest of us. Making noise just draws more of ‘em. Daryl’s smart. If anybody can find Sophia and get her back safe, he can.”

“My little girl’s lost in the woods,” Carol choked out. 

“Honey, he’s gonna find her,” Lori promised. “He will.” She came up behind Carol and gently squeezed her shoulder. Carol brought her hand up to put over Lori’s, and she took a trembling breath. She knew going out into those woods would do Sophia absolutely no good, but now she was playing the scene back in her head and wishing she’d taken off after her. Maybe if she was out there, Sophia would feel so scared. Or maybe she’d feel more terrified, because she knew her mother couldn’t protect her from the monsters. The first twelve years of her life had been an example of that. 

Her stomach lurched at the last thought. She did her best to keep Ed’s anger and abuse directed at her and her only, but he’d gotten loud and angry with Sophia on more than one occasion. He’d lifted his hand to her, but Carol had stopped him. It had only turned into a worse beating behind the closed door of their bedroom later that night. She’d done her best to make sure it was she alone that carried Ed’s bruises.

Ed was gone now, and the part of her that still wanted to believe in God liked to think it had been Divine intervention. The last few months before the world turned upside down, he’d been looking at Sophia more, and it had made Carol’s skin crawl. She’d made certain to never leave Ed alone in the house and had even encouraged Sophia to lock her bedroom door at night, lying to her about being safer because of a rash of break ins in the neighborhood that never actually happened. She hadn’t been sure his heart would ever turn so sour and sick that he’d do such a thing, but she’d never thought he could hurt her the way he had, either. The Ed Peletier that died in that tent was not the man she married, or at the very least, he had done an excellent job of hiding his true self during the earliest years of their relationship. She’d prayed for his death countless times, and when he finally _did_ die, she had felt the weight of the last few years just fall away. He wasn’t going to hurt her ever again. He wasn’t going to have the opportunity to hurt Sophia.

“Carol, you should get some rest,” Dale chimed in, stepping up to the small group gathered at the side of the road. “You take my RV and get some rest. We’ll wake you when Daryl gets back.” Carol shook her head, and her shoulders slumped. She covered her face with her hands, and her jaw tensed and trembled. She fought hard to keep the tears away, but they came again. 

Her shoulders shook, and Andrea and Lori both held their arms around her as she cried. She knew this world wasn’t meant for children. It was violent and brutal, but with Ed gone, Carol had had some hope that maybe that meant they could survive.

“Daryl’s the best tracker, Carol,” Shane offered, as Carol took a shaking breath. He was out there looking for her little girl while the monsters chased after her. It had been too long. What if he was hurt, too? What if…

The knots in Carol’s stomach twisted painfully, and her throat felt hot like she might get sick. She took a deep breath and turned to walk back toward the RV. But a moment later, a rustling from the tree line had everybody taking a big step back. Shane shined his flashlight into the moving leaves, and Carol spun around just in time to see a walker come stumbling out, snapping its jaws and outstretching its hands. Carols’ heart sank, and she turned away quickly, covering her mouth with her hand. 

“It’s ok, honey,” Lori soothed her, pulling her into a hug as Shane and Rick advanced on the walker and quickly put it down. 

“They’re still out there,” she choked out. 

“I know. I know,” Lori whispered.

“Mom!” Carl shouted from the top of the RV.

“Carl, quiet! Those things could still be out there.”

“No, mom, there’s a horse!” 

“A horse, little man?” Shane asked. “C’mon now.”

“No, really!” Carl pointed down the road, and sure enough, coming up the road about a half mile down was someone on horseback, and they looked like they were in a terrible hurry. 

“Alright, everybody into the RV,” Rick urged, waving everyone off one at a time. Carol lingered back with Lori behind Rick, watching as the figure drew closer. Rick and Shane drew their weapons, and Carol clutched Lori’s hand. 

“Carol? One of you Carol?” A young woman with dark hair wearing a cowboy hat brought the horse to a stop before the startled survivors. Carol gasped softly, and Lori squeezed her hand. 

“Who are you?” Shane asked, narrowing his eyes at the woman. 

“I take it you ain’t Carol, so don’t waste my time.”

“I’m Carol,” Carol spoke up, her voice soft and trembling. 

“Daryl sent me. It’s Sophia. She’s been hurt.”

“Oh God. No,” Carol choked out. Her knees threatened to buckle, and Lori kept her upright. 

“She’s lost a lot of blood, but my daddy’s workin’ on her now.”

“We just supposed to trust you on that?” Shane asked.

“Shane, she knows Daryl and Sophia’s names,” Rick pointed out. 

“We don’t have time to sit here and build trust,” the woman barked. “Now ya’ll need to turn yourself around and come back about a mile and a half to the last exit. Fairburn road. Take it about two miles, and you’ll see a long drive with the name Green on the mailbox. That’s us.” She reached her hand out toward Carol. “Come on, you need to get there fast, and they’re gonna have to turn this RV around.”

“She’s gonna die,” Carol choked out.

“My daddy’s doin’ everything he can. But you gotta come with me _now_.” Carol looked to Lori and then to Andrea, and finally, she stepped out between Rick and Shane and let the woman help her up on the horse. The woman clicked her tongue, and the horse started off down the highway before cutting off through the woods and out of sight.

“What the hell are we waiting here for?” Dale asked, stepping back off the RV. “Let’s go after them!”

“We don’t know these people,” Shane bit out. 

“They have Daryl and Sophia. Now they have Carol,” Lori countered. “You really wanna sit here and do nothing? Sophia could be dying!”

“We have to go! It’s Sophia!” Carl insisted. “Please!” Shane rubbed the back of his neck and finally nodded his head.

“Alright. Alright, we’ll go. But if anything, and I mean anything looks wrong there, we’re gettin’ the hell outta there. We didn’t survive this long to let our guards down now.” 

_Author’s Note: Thanks for reading guys! Hope you are all well! Please drop me some feedback and let me know what you think!_


	5. Chapter 5

Five

Daryl paced back and forth on the wrap-around porch. Darkness had settled on the farm, and all he could think about was how pale and lifeless Sophia had been in his arms and how his shirt was soaked with her blood. All he could do was think of how the last thing Carol needed was to lose her little girl. 

When the screen door opened, the older man with white hair, a man who’d introduced himself as Hershel, came walking out wiping the blood from his hands. Daryl’s eyes narrowed at him. He couldn’t read the expression on the man’s face.

“She alive?”

“She’s alive. She’s lost a lot of blood. What happened out there?” he asked.

“Ask your man Otis,” Daryl growled. “He’s the one that shot her.”

“He said he didn’t see her ‘til it was too late. He said there were five of those things out there.”

“And he managed to shoot one of living.”

“If there’s anything I can do…” Otis came walking up onto the porch from the yard. “I’m so sorry.”

“You done enough,” Daryl seethed.

“I’m sorry about your girl. If I could take it back….I…”

“Otis, go inside. See if Patricia needs help with anything,” Hershel urged. He turned back to Daryl. “She’s lost a lot of blood. What’s her type?”

“I…I don’t know.”

“You don’t know your daughter’s blood type?” Daryl tensed, and he looked Hershel in the eye.

“She…she ain’t mine. Barely know her.”

“That little girl doesn’t have time to wait. She lost a lot of blood. The bullet nicked an artery in her leg. Now, we’ve stopped the bleeding, but she’s gonna need a transfusion.”

“Wouldn’t that be better comin’ from her mama?”

“She might not even last that long.” Daryl pushed the heels of his hands into his eyes for a moment, groaning as panic settled into his chest.

“Take mine.”

“Yours?”

“I got that universal donor blood or whatever you call it. Type O or some shit.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yeah, my brother wrecked his bike once, and he damn near bled out. Ain’t the first time I had to do this.”

“Alright. It’ll have to do. It’d be better coming from family, but…” Daryl took a step toward Hershel.

“That girl that went to find my group—”

“My daughter, Maggie.”

“Maggie. She knows where to look?”

“She was born and raised in this house. Her sister, too. Maggie’ll find that little girl’s mama.”

“Should we wait for her? For Carol? If her blood’s gonna be better—”

“If we don’t give her blood soon, she won’t make it through the hour.” Daryl took a deep breath and nodded his head. 

“Then we ain’t got no time to lose.” He stepped past the older man and went into the house. Hershel was right behind him, and he followed the commotion into the small bedroom just off of the living room. Otis and the woman—Patricia—were gathered around Sophia’s bed. When Daryl stepped in, he noticed how pale and weak the girl looked. Her blue shirt was spattered with blood, a grim stain over an otherwise cheerful rainbow screen print. 

“Patricia, I’ll need your help,” Hershel insisted, stepping into the room and grabbing some tubing from the tray set up at Sophia’s bedside. 

“Here, you can sit here,” Patricia instructed Daryl, sliding a chair right up next to the bed. “You’ll need to be close.” Daryl sat down slowly, keeping his eye trained on Sophia. She was so still, and if it hadn’t been for the rise and fall of her chest, he would have wondered if she was still alive. 

Patricia took Daryl’s arm in her hands and turned it so his palm faced the ceiling. She wiped a cold, wet little wipe over the crook of his arm. Next, she wrapped a tourniquet around his upper arm, and then she brought the needle over. She attached it to the end of the tube, and Daryl winced when she jabbed it into his arm. She pushed past the scar tissue that had built up from all the times he’d donated plasma to earn money when he was out of work or needed bail money for Merle. He remembered the phlebotomists always telling him to ball his hand into a fist and pump like he was holding a stress ball.

He waited until Hershel stuck the other needle into Sophia’s arm, and when he released the clamp, the blood ran thick and warm through the tube. 

“You’ll probably want to sit back a little. You might start feeling light headed,” Patricia warned. Daryl did as Patricia suggested, and he spread his legs out a little to get comfortable. He passed one last glance at Sophia’s pale face before he closed his eyes and tilted his head toward the ceiling, seeing nothing but Carol’s face in his mind and knowing just how heartbroken she was going to be. This world had freed her from that abusive asshole of a husband, but it might just have taken her little girl, too. It just wasn’t fair.

*~*~*~*~*

Carol hadn’t ridden a horse since she was seven years old, so she held onto Maggie for dear life as she urged the horse through a short cut in the woods. She had a couple of scrapes on her arms from tree branches, but it wasn’t anything she was worried about. All she cared about was getting to her daughter. The first thing that flashed through her mind when she got on that horse was absolute fear that maybe she was being lied to. But how would Maggie know Daryl’s name or Sophia’s? 

She shook the thoughts from her mind, and her heart thundered in anticipation of getting to her girl’s side. Maggie hadn’t elaborated on Sophia’s injury, but Carol feared the worst. Sophia had never had so much as an overnight stay at a hospital since she had her tonsils out when she was three. She had been a pretty healthy kid who got the occasional cold or sprained ankle. Whatever this was, it sounded bad, and if Sophia was conscious, she had to be terrified.

When they finally broke past the tree line, the horse began cantering through a grassy field. Much to Carol’s surprise, about a mile ahead was a big, white farm house lit up like Christmas morning. 

“Carol, right?” Maggie called over her shoulder as the horse picked up speed. 

“Yes.”

“Alright, Carol. I need you to hold on, ok? We’ve got fences around here to keep the dead out.”

“Ok,” Carol said slowly, uncertain what was coming next, but as Maggie tugged on the reigns and urged to horse to go faster, she realized what was about to happen. She held onto Maggie a little tighter, and when the horse leapt into the air, Carol felt her heart leap into her throat. When they were back on solid ground, she relaxed, and she had to stop herself from jumping off of the horse and running the rest of the way back up to the house.

Maggie let out a shrill whistle as they approached, and moments later, the front door opened and a few people stepped out. Maggie slowed the horse to a walk and then stopped him just before the porch steps. A younger man came rushing down the steps to greet them. 

“Jimmy, help Carol down. She’s the girl’s mom.” Jimmy nodded and reached up for Carol. She took his hand, and he helped her down. Maggie came down off the horse on her own, and she went directly into the older man’s arms. He hugged her, and she pulled back. “The rest of them are coming. Somebody’ll need to meet them at the gate to let them in.”

“I’ll go,” Jimmy offered. Hershel nodded.

“You be careful. Take my shotgun off the mantle, alright?” Jimmy nodded and hurried into the house.

“Sophia?” Carol panted, her eyes brimmed with tears as she searched Hershel’s face.

“It was an accident. She was shot.” Carol’s hand flew to her chest, and she let out a choked sob. Hershel quickly held his hands up. “She’s alive. She’s alive. Daryl’s with her now. He carried her all the way here. Gave her his own blood. She wouldn’t have made it if it wasn’t for him.”

“God,” she panted. “Is she…is she gonna…” Hershel reached up and put a hand on Carol’s shoulder.

“It’s up to her now. You should sit with her. She’ll need to know her mama’s here.”

“Where is she?” Carol sniffled. 

“Right this way,” Hershel urged softly, leading Carol to the small bedroom. When she stepped inside, Hershel reached for the doorknob. “I’ll give you some time.” He looked to Patricia and nodded for her to follow him. Patricia quickly tied off the bandage around Daryl’s arm and got up to follow Hershel out.

Carol stood frozen in place in front of Sophia’s bed. 

“Oh God,” she whispered.

“She’s strong,” Daryl murmured from his place by Sophia’s bed. Carol looked at him, noticing how pale he looked, how his shirt was soaked with blood. She trembled, and she made her way to Sophia’s bedside, leaning down to press a kiss to her forehead.

“I’m here, Sophia,” she whispered. “Mommy’s here.” She smoothed her hair back and took her hand. When she looked back up at Daryl, she gasped softly to find his head rolling back a little. “Daryl? Daryl!” His eyes flew open, and he rubbed his face with his hand.

“I’m ok. M’fine,” he murmured. Carol noticed the untouched glass of lemonade at his side. She pressed a kiss to Sophia’s hand and moved to the other side of the bed, picking up the glass from the table. 

“Drink this.”

“Don’t gotta fuss over me.”

“I’m not fussing,” she said softly. “I’m worried about you.”

“Don’t. She’s the only one needs worryin’ about.” Carol didn’t budge. She held the glass there until Daryl accepted it. He took a couple of gulps and winced at the sour taste, but he took one more gulp for good measure. When Carol was satisfied, she put the glass back down. She stood there, staring down at him, and he met her gaze before quickly breaking it. He looked anywhere. At the floor. At the wall. At Sophia. At his feet. Anywhere but her eyes. Carol reached out and put her hand on his shoulder. 

“What happened?”

“She was scared. She was so far ahead of me, and there were five or six of them things between us. I distracted a couple of ‘em, and they came runnin’ for me. But those others were still after her. She got so far ahead.” He took a deep breath. “We got into a clearing, and there was more of ‘em. They were surroundin’ her. She had her back up against a tree, and I was gettin’ closer. All of a sudden, I heard a pop. One of them things went down. Then I caught sight of Sophia. She looked right at me, and then I heard another pop. The color drained outta her face so fast, and she went down.” 

“Oh God,” Carol choked out. She felt her head go swimmy, and she sat down on the edge of the bed. Daryl finally looked her in the eye. 

“It was an accident. Hershel’s guy Otis. He, uh, he was out checking traps. He had an old handgun with a silencer. Guess they knew about them things bein’ drawn to noise. He got her right in the leg. She was bleedin’ everywhere. Otis led us back here, and Hershel saved her life.” Carol covered her face with her hands, and her shoulders shook, and Daryl sat forward in his chair a little. “She’s strong. She’s her mama’s daughter. She’s got your blood. She’s gonna beat this.” Carol let out a little chuckle and dried her eyes. She nodded then and blinked back fresh tears when she looked into his eyes.

“And it’s _your_ blood that might save her life,” she murmured. “Thank you.”

“You don’t gotta thank me for that,” he murmured. “You’d have done the same if you was here.”

“But I wasn’t. You were.” She took a deep breath and shook her head. “You did more for my little girl today than Ed ever did. You’re a good man.” She turned on the bed then, peering down at her little girl and taking her hand again. “She’s strong. She’s gonna survive thanks to you.” 

_Author’s Note: Thanks for reading, guys! Hope you enjoyed this chapter! More coming soon! As always, feedback is greatly appreciated!_


	6. Chapter 6

Six

The rest of the group had arrived at the farm about a half hour after Carol, and Hershel had agreed to let them set up camp on his property. Patricia had brought food in for Carol and Daryl, who hadn’t moved from his spot in the chair by Sophia’s bed. He was still pale and a little woozy, and while Carol hadn’t left Sophia’s bedside, she was keeping a close eye on Daryl. She’d found a white blanket in the bottom of the wardrobe and had draped it over his sleeping form. 

Andrea, Lori, Rick and the others had taken turns coming in to check in, and Carol had thanked them for being so kind. Rick had told her that Hershel was letting them stay as long as was needed to get Sophia well again, but they would be expected to move on when the time came. While Carol hated the idea of her little girl being back out there on the road, she also knew that if it wasn’t for Hershel’s medical knowledge, Sophia would have likely bled out in Daryl’s arms. She was grateful for that, and saving her daughter’s life and giving them a safe haven for even a few weeks was a gift in this new world.

Sometime in the night, Maggie stepped into the room. Carol was half asleep but looked toward the door when it opened.

“Sorry,” Maggie whispered. “How’s she doing?”

“She hasn’t woken up,” Carol murmured, squeezing Sophia’s hand.

“She will,” Maggie insisted. She glanced over at Daryl, who was fast asleep in the chair, his arm outstretched, a small blood stain in the center of the bandage. “He’s ok?”

“Yeah. But I’m keeping an eye on him,” Carol said with a little nod. “I think he gave too much blood.” She glanced over at Daryl in concern and then back up at Maggie.

“He’ll live.”

“Hershel…your dad, right?” Maggie nodded. “He’s done this before?”

“He tried,” Maggie said quietly. “He’s no doctor. He’s a vet. But he’s the closest thing we had, and he saved Jimmy’s life.” 

“Jimmy’s your brother?”

“No,” Maggie said with a sad smile. “He was my little sister’s boyfriend.” Carol noticed the way Maggie’s brows furrowed and how she shook her head as if warding off bad memories. Carol took a deep breath and leaned her head back against her chair. “When all this happened, my daddy was convinced it was some bad virus. Like a super flu or somethin’.” She shook her head. “He didn’t want to believe it. My mama went down to the neighbor’s to sell some eggs. They were good friends, so when they didn’t come to the door, she let herself in. Her friend attacked her. Mom came home, frantic and cryin’. She turned the TV on while daddy was stitchin’ up the bite. It was so new then. We didn’t know she was gonna die like that. And Beth…well, Beth wouldn’t leave her side. She stayed with her. And when Mama died in the middle of the night, she came back, and Beth was sleeping.” Carol put her hand over her mouth.

“Oh God, I’m so sorry.”

“Jimmy panicked when he rushed in the room. He saw on the news about killing the brain, and he went after Mama. Beth panicked and shoved him out of the way. The knife cut his arm so bad we thought he was gonna fall over dead right then. Daddy saved him.”

“And Beth…”

“She’s buried out by the fence with our mama.”

“I can’t imagine,” Carol choked out. 

“You can,” Maggie pointed out. “We’ve all lost someone in this world. We’re still here, right?” She looked at Sophia. “She’s still here. I like to think that’s for a reason.” Maggie moved over toward Sophia and gently placed her palm against the girl’s forehead. “No fever. That’s a good sign.” Maggie turned back to Carol and offered her a tight smile. “You should rest. Try not to worry. She’s fighting hard. If she wasn’t, she wouldn’t be here, right?”

“Right,” Carol whispered softly. 

“I’ll leave you be,” Maggie said quietly. “Like I said, try not to worry. The hard part’s over. She lived through that.” Carol nodded and let out a breath. The ache in her chest eased up for a fraction of a moment. She watched Maggie leave, and then she settled back against the chair again. The last thing she did before she closed her eyes was pass concerned gazes over Daryl and Sophia’s sleeping forms, and she hoped tomorrow morning would bring good news for all of them.

*~*~*~*~*~*

“Mom?” Carol moaned softly in her sleep. “Mommy?” She felt warm and cozy, and for a moment, she wondered if the past several weeks had been nothing but a fever dream. “Mom.” The ache in her back and the dull throb in her temples reminded her that she’d been curled up in an uncomfortable chair for hours. And then she remembered why. Her eyes snapped open, and she sat up, peering over at the bed to see Sophia looking around the room with equal parts fear and confusion in her eyes. When she tried to sit up, she winced in pain. 

“Hey. Hey,” Carol whispered. “Hi, sweetheart.”

“Mom, what happened?” she groaned, patting the blanket over her leg. 

“You got hurt. You don’t remember?” Sophia grimaced and shook her head. 

“I remember running through the woods,” she whispered hoarsely. Carol sat up then, and a blanket fell from her lap. She looked down to find the very same white blanket she’d covered Daryl with. She glanced over at his chair to see it was empty, and her heart jumped into her throat for a moment. But she turned her attention back to Sophia and slid over to sit on the side of the bed. “I remember Daryl. And those monsters were everywhere.” 

“Yeah,” Carol whispered. “Sophia, you got shot, but Daryl brought you here, and they fixed you up. You’re gonna be ok.”

“I got shot?” Sophia whispered. 

“Yeah, but it doesn’t matter. It’s ok now. You’re ok. That’s what matters.” She leaned forward and pressed a kiss to Sophia’s forehead. She looked over her shoulder toward the open bedroom door. “Hershel? Maggie?” Moments later, the older man appeared in the doorway, and a tentative smile pulled at his lips.

“Well, this is good news,” he chuckled. “Hello, Sophia. My name’s Hershel.”

“Are you a doctor?” Sophia asked. Hershel shook his head and put his hand against Sophia’s forehead. 

“I’m as close as you’re going to get around these parts these days,” he said quietly. “How do you feel?”

“It hurts,” she managed, biting back another whimper. Carol took Sophia’s hand and squeezed it. Hershel glanced at Carol.

“I’ll get her something for the pain. It’ll probably make her groggy for the next several hours. But she’ll rest.” 

“She’s gonna be ok?” Carol asked, blinking back tears.

“She’ll be fine. I think the danger’s passed. I’ll send Patricia in to re-dress the incision, and we’ll do what we can to stave off infection.” He got up and left the room for a short minute, and Carol turned her attention back to Sophia. 

“It hurts,” Sophia whimpered again. Carol nodded and kissed her hand.

“I know, baby. But you’re gonna feel better in a minute, ok? Then you’re going to sleep, and maybe when you wake up, you’ll feel better. Remember after you had your tonsils out? Hmm? It hurt for a few days after, but eventually, you felt better than before. Right?” Sophia nodded. “I love you.”

“Love you too,” Sophia murmured, wincing in pain again. Hershel entered the room again, this time with Patricia. He settled down at Sophia’s side, and Carol noticed the syringe in his hand. 

“What is that?” Carol asked, sitting forward in her chair.

“It’s for the pain,” Hershel promised. Sophia squeezed her eyes shut and turned her head away when he stuck her with the needle, but moments later, she relaxed, and her breathing slowed. Her eyes fluttered closed, and she whimpered softly for a few moments before silence filled the room.

“Is it supposed to work that fast?” Carol asked.

“It works differently for everyone. Thankfully for Sophia, it makes her groggy. I do believe she’s partially conscious, but she’s not going to be feeling any pain for a few hours.” He looked to Patricia, who was setting out fresh gauze and bandages. “Make it fast. We want to keep exposure to a minimum right now. And mind the stitches.” Patricia nodded and pulled the blanket back to reveal the bandage on Sophia’s thigh. Carol grimaced at the sight of blood seeping through it, and Hershel put a hand on her shoulder. “You should step out for this.”

“She shouldn’t be alone,” Carol sniffled. 

“She won’t be. I’ll send Maggie in to hold her hand if it’ll make you feel better. You’ve been through enough tonight. Let us take care of her so you can get some air. Alright?” Carol hesitated for a moment. 

“I’ll sit with her.” Carol turned to see Andrea standing in the doorway. Her hair was disheveled, and she looked like she hadn’t slept. She stepped into the room and put a hand on Carol’s back. “I think Carol would feel better if somebody she knows sat with Sophia. Right?” Carol sniffled and nodded her head. 

“That’s understandable,” Hershel offered with a kind smile. “Carol? Would you step out if Andrea sat with her?” Carol wiped at her eyes and nodded. She stood and leaned over Sophia to press a kiss to her forehead. 

“Andrea’s right here. I’ll be back soon, ok? I promise. I love you.” She smoothed her hand over Sophia’s hair and smiled down at her girl. “Everything’s gonna be ok.”

Carol reluctantly left the room after Andrea took her place at Sophia’s bedside. She made her way down the hall, being guided only by a single lamp lit in the front of the house. She noticed the front door was open, and a fresh, cool breeze blew in. She hated those hot, summer days, but she loved the cool darkness of the early morning. It had always been her favorite time of day. She used to make a cup of coffee and sit on the porch and enjoy the quiet before Ed would wake for the day. 

As she stepped out onto the porch, she noticed a figure sitting on the steps staring out toward the small camp the group had made around the RV out by the field. It wasn’t until she stepped outside and came closer that she noticed it was Daryl sitting there with a cigarette between his lips. Daryl looked up when Carol came to stand beside where he was sitting.

“She ok?”

“She’s awake,” Carol murmured with a nervous smile. “Well, she was awake. Hershel gave her something for the pain. She’s out again.” Daryl nodded then and looked away before scooting over just a little, a silent invitation for her to join him. Carol sat and pulled her arms around her knees. “Daryl, are you ok?” 

“Mmm,” he murmured, letting out a puff of smoke before discarding the butt onto the sidewalk. He stared at it and watched the tip smolder for a moment. “Just needed some fresh air.”

“Yeah, really fresh,” Carol teased. She waved her hand in front of her face as the smoke cleared.

“Sorry,” he muttered. “First one I’ve had in weeks.” He chewed the inside of his lip for a moment. 

“It’s ok,” she smiled. “I understand.” She rubbed her hands over her arms, and Daryl eyed her. 

“You cold?” 

“No. Not at all. It feels good.” She let out a slow breath, and she turned her head toward him. “I know I thanked you before, but I need you to know what you did for me. For Sophia.” Carol put her hand on his arm, and he looked down at her, almost surprised at the contact of her cool fingertips against his bare arm. She drew her hand away and folded her hands in her lap. “I’ve been holding my breath for years.” She shook her head and gave him a sleepy, sad smile. “I used to hold my breath when Ed would turn over in the night. I used to tense all over and lay so still until he went back to sleep. I’d hold my breath when he got mad or when he would…” 

“When he’d hit ya. Make ya pray he’d kill ya this time or drop dead himself. Either way, the pain would stop.” Carol gasped softly and blinked back tears. She nodded. “Yeah, I know.”

“When Ed died, I felt like I could breathe again, but I was afraid to, because I didn’t know what would happen next. And then Sophia went into the woods, and I thought this was some cruel karma for wishing for Ed’s death all those years. And then _you_ saved her. You did that, Daryl. You gave me my little girl back. I can breathe. For the first time in ten years, I feel…I don’t know…hope.”

“She’s strong. She was scared, but she kept runnin’. She’s a fighter,” Daryl murmured. Carol let out a soft laugh and nodded her head.

“She is.”

“Think she gets that from you.” Carol wiped her tears away again, and she leaned in to press her lips gently against his cheek. 

“Thank you,” she whispered, her breath warm against his skin. She pulled back, and even in the darkness, she could see he was looking right at her. She saw him lean in just a little, and she met him with a soft kiss. His lips were chapped but tender against hers, and she gasped softly when he turned toward her and brought his hand to rest on her thigh. She put her hand over his, and he pulled back for a breath. She chased his lips and met him for another kiss. His lips parted against hers, and he sucked her bottom lip into his mouth briefly before pulling away. Carol let out a soft chuckle and rested her forehead against his shoulder. She felt him tremble as he let out a heavy breath, and ducked his head against a cool breeze. 

They sat like that for a long while, and before Carol got up to check on Sophia, she pressed a kiss to his temple, and he caught her hand in his. He looked up at her, as if he wanted to say something, but instead, he squeezed her hand and pulled himself up, and together, they went back into the house.

_Author’s Note: Hey guys! Thanks so much for your amazing feedback! I hope you enjoyed this chapter as well! Feedback is always appreciated and encouraged!_


	7. Chapter 7

Seven

A week on the Greene farm had done Sophia a world of good. The girl, while still having some pain, was able to get up and walk around outside. Carl had been extremely attentive to her, and the kids were never outside at least one of the adults’ view.

The property was safe. Still, Shane and Otis patrolled the perimeter at least twice a day checking for any potential breech. Hershel had offered the old barn for temporary sleeping quarters. They all knew within a couple of weeks, he would be asking them to move on. Some, like Shane and Andrea, were having a harder time accepting that than others. 

Daryl had kept his distance from the group. Once he knew Sophia was out of the woods and on the mend, he’d set up camp in one of the old fields, now just overgrown with tall grass. He’d join the group for breakfast in the morning, and Carol would give him a look that would make him feel both guilty and ravenous. He wanted her more than he’d ever wanted anything in his whole pointless life. 

The first time he’d touched her, when they’d taken each other by surprise in the CDC showers, he’d thought it was just about the best thing he’d ever felt. He wasn’t a virgin by any means, but before the world turned to shit, he kept to himself for the most part and avoided relationships like the plague. For him, sex wasn’t what worried him. It was what happened after. He’d never been good at that cuddling stuff or the meaningful conversations. He’d never known what to talk about, and he’d always felt so tongue tied that he’d felt it best not to say anything. Words created feelings, and like Merle once told him, feelings complicated shit, and shit was complicated enough.

He was embarrassed to admit to himself that most of what he’d learned to do with a woman had come from the pornos he’d found in a shoe box in Merle’s closet. He’d was seventeen. Merle had been locked up where he couldn’t bitch about his baby brother messing with his shit, and Daryl was curious. Besides, he’d made sure to put them back where he found them, and Merle had never been the wiser. The women he’d been with had never really offered any complaints about the quality of what he had to offer, but he typically never heard from them again either, so he didn’t know if he was any good or not.

Still, Carol had seemed to enjoy herself, and then she’d had come to him that next night, and it had felt even better. Maybe it was because they had barely escaped with their lives and were running on pure adrenaline, but it was the best sex he’d ever had. And she’d _wanted_ him. And he wanted her. It confused the hell out of him, because he’d never met anyone he just wanted to be close to. And that night, when she’d kissed him on the porch after Sophia woke up, he’d wanted it but feared it at the same time, and when it was over, he found himself wanting more. And what the hell was he supposed to do with that, anyway? He’d disappeared right after breakfast and started setting up his own camp, and the first time he’d seen her after that kiss, she’d looked at him with some sort of anticipation or expectation. And he didn’t know what to do with that, either. He felt like a fucking coward; like the biggest asshole on the planet.

All of his life he’d grown up with somebody telling him he was nothing and would always be nothing and that he was just some asshole who’d never amount to anything. For years, he’d believed it. He’d gotten by on his own with somebody to occasionally warm his bed and disappear by morning. He’d resigned himself to believing that he was less than a man. He was a Dixon man. Dixon men weren’t the happily-ever-after kind. None of the women he’d been with had ever so much as slipped a number in his hand or looked at him with stars in their eyes like they were imagining a future. So why did she kiss him? Why did she let him touch her? Why’d she let him fuck her a second time? And why the hell did she smile at him when she walked by, even when he avoided her? Surely she was just being kind because he helped her kid. Surely that kiss was more of a goodbye than a beginning of…something. What? He didn’t know.

He was no good, and she deserved better than him. So, when she kissed him, he knew he’d gotten too close. Feelings complicated shit, and shit was already complicated enough.

And what made it worse was he’d taken her hand, and maybe that had given her some indication of what he was feeling. Maybe that was why he was so afraid to be near her. He could lie to himself all fucking day long about how he just needed to get his dick wet or some other asshole thing the voice in his head that sounded suspiciously like Merle would say. The truth was, every night he slept in his own private camp, all he could do was think about her and how she

She hadn’t approached his camp, and he’d avoided her, so when he noticed her walking over after breakfast, he suddenly felt the urge to crawl under a rock.

“Hey,” she said quietly, kicking at a dirt clod with the toe of her shoe. 

“Hey,” he said back, looking up briefly to see a little smile on her lips.

“Nice place you set up for yourself.” She eyed the tent behind him and glanced over her shoulder when Sophia’s laughter carried from up on the porch of the house. He looked up in time to see Carol’s smile brighten at the sound. Daryl looked around for a moment, and he rubbed the back of his neck anxiously when Carol sat down on a log across from him. He stared at her feet for a moment, watched the way her fingers curled into the decorative ties on the bottoms of her khaki-colored capris. “Daryl?” He looked up to meet her gaze, aware that his face was probably flushed pink. He felt warm, and the way she was looking at him told him he was going to have to use words, worse he wasn’t sure how to express. “What’s going on?”

“Just needed some space. Too many damn people ‘round that house. Go into the barn, somebody’s there. Go in the house, somebody’s there. Only time you get some peace and quiet is in the shower, and even then ya get five minutes of lukewarm water and then somebody’s bangin’ on the door.”

“Yeah, it’s a little crowded. Well, the good news is, we don’t have to worry about that much longer. We’ll be getting an eviction notice any day now.” She raised her eyebrows, and Daryl managed a little snort. “Hey, come on. I know I’m no stand-up comedian, but I’m trying here.” She tapped the toe of his boot with her foot. “I’m a big girl, Daryl. If you wanted to end this, you could have just told me. You didn’t have to come all the way out here.” Daryl looked up at her for a moment, and he swallowed. “Is it because I kissed you?”

“What?”

“Since I kissed you on the porch the night you saved Sophia, you haven’t said much to me. You barely look at me. It was a kiss, Daryl.” She stuttered over those last words, and Daryl picked up a smooth stone to worry between his fingers. “Hey.” He looked up at her. “Is this over? I mean, whatever this is…do you want to stop?” 

“I ain’t good for you.” His voice was low and soft, and when he looked her in the eye, she felt her heart skip a beat. 

“That’s not what I asked you. When I kissed you, was that too much? What was I to you? Just a good fuck?” Daryl’s head snapped up at her boldness. He stared at her for a long minute, this time swallowing back his anxieties. The tension in his jaw eased, and he swallowed hard. He barely shook his head, but it was enough. “I didn’t think so. So why are you avoiding me?”

“I ain’t good for you,” he repeated. “I ain’t nothin’ special.”

“Why don’t you let me be the judge of that?” She narrowed her eyes at him. “I spent over twelve years being told what to do and when to do it, and I don’t appreciate _you_ trying to tell me what’s good for me. You don’t know me.”

“No, I don’t.” He tossed the smooth stone off into the tall grass but he kept his eyes on Carol’s. “And you don’t know me.”

“I know you’re the kind of man that would risk his life to save a little girl. I know you’re the kind of man that gave his blood to save that little girl’s life.” Daryl looked away. “I know you’ve been hurt. Someone hurt you bad. Someone who was supposed to love you. I know you have scars. I have ‘em too. Some of them you can see. Some you can’t. I know you’re the only person who hasn’t walked on eggshells around me since Ed died. I know you say you’re not good for me, but I know the worst thing that ever happened to me is dead.” Daryl flinched, and Carol let out a shaky breath. “It’s a lot. We’ve both been through a lot. If you don’t want me, just say it. I’d rather know now.”

Daryl clenched his jaw, and he stood up. Carol sat back a little and watched him take a few steps over to his tent. She looked down, expecting that to be the end of it. What had she expected? It was just sex. And she’d fucked it up by kissing him. She hadn’t meant to scare him off. She’d simply needed comforting and had wanted to thank him for saving her little girl. 

To her surprise, Daryl turned from where he was, and he stalked back over to her, his steps quick, almost panicked. Carol stood quickly, and she watched him struggling to find the words. 

“I think about you.” He took a step closer to her. “And all I can think is you been through enough. You need somebody who ain’t…”

“No.” She shook her head. “What do you want?” She watched his gaze lower to the ground. 

“Don’t wanna stop,” he murmured. “Can’t stop thinkin’ about it.” He chewed at the inside of his lip for a moment, and then he turned toward his tent again.

“I don’t either,” she admitted. “I’m not asking for a proposal, Daryl. You have needs. I have needs. It doesn’t have to be anything more than that. Or it can be. I just…don’t want this to end.” Daryl huffed out a breath. “I know what it’s like to be told you’re not good enough. That nobody would ever want you. But I’m living proof they lied. I see you, Daryl. I want you to see me, too.” She reached out and put her hand on his arm. “Don’t pull away. Please.” She took a deep breath and offered him a sad smile before turning away. She took two steps, and then she felt his fingers curl around her wrist. She gasped softly and turned to him.

“Will you come back?” he asked quietly. 

“I will if you want me to,” she nodded. Daryl nodded then, and he fought for the courage to look her in the eyes, to talk to her, to ask her what he needed to. 

“Will you come back…tonight?” His thumb gently traced over the bone that faintly protruded at the base of her thumb. A shiver ran through her. She licked her lips, and his gaze fell there. She drew in a quick breath and nodded.

“Tonight,” she promised.

_Author’s Note: Thank you guys so much for reading! I am loving reading your comments, and I hope you continue to enjoy the story! I always appreciate and encourage feedback! Hope you all like the chapter!_


	8. Eight

Eight

The hot summer day had turned into a chilly night, and Carol wrapped her arms around herself when she crept silently out the front door of the Greene house and onto the porch. She’d been sleeping in the living room, a kind allowance from Hershel who knew that Carol wanted to be under the same roof with her daughter. 

She’d just checked on Sophia, who was sleeping soundly. The rest of the house was silent, the only sounds were the gentle creaks from beneath her feet. She’d held her breath, feeling every bit of sixteen and sneaking out of the house to fool around with her boyfriend in his car without getting caught. 

The camp outside was silent. A gentle breeze made Carol shiver, and she rubbed her hands up her bare arms. The heat that had convinced her to wear a tank top that afternoon was long gone, and she thought briefly about going back inside and finding a shawl or a sweater. But, she knew if she went back in, the chances of getting caught would only get higher.

She wasn’t sure why she felt the need to sneak around. Maybe it was the thrill of it. She honestly didn’t care either way if people knew she and Daryl were screwing around, but he didn’t seem the type to want people gossiping about his sex life, and with so little to do in this lonely new world, people had to come up with their own forms of entertainment. Even the apocalypse wouldn’t stop a juicy piece of gossip.

She kept her eyes trained toward the barn and the camp, looking for any sign of movement, but it was dark and still, and the only sound that could be heard as she stepped across the property was the symphony of crickets and the occasional call of a night bird.

When she made it to the field and started in the direction of Daryl’s tent, she wondered if he was sleeping. She knew sometimes he would lay awake, maybe reading, because she’d noticed a faint light from his tent just after sunset the past couple of nights. She wondered if she’d waited too long, and he’d given up and gone to sleep. Or maybe he was laying there awake, waiting for her, his entire body thrumming with anticipation and need like hers was doing as she walked onward.

Her heart was racing when she stepped up to his tent and drew the zipper down. She peered into the darkness, unable to make anything out, but she could hear his steady breath hitch, and she knew he was awake. Her face flushed hot, and she stepped inside, drawing the zipper back up. She toed her shoes off and held her hands out in front of her until she felt his fingers wrap around her wrist. She gasped softly when he tugged her down into his lap.

“Daryl?” It came out as more of a question, and when he buried his face against her chest and took a deep breath, she felt his shoulders shake with an amused chuckle.

“Expectin’ someone else?”

“You were quiet. I thought you were sleeping.” She bit her lip when his hands slid up the back of her shirt. His calloused hands were surprisingly gentle as they slid up her spine and back down. She shivered, and she tilted her head back when she felt his hot breath against her neck. 

“Wasn’t.” His hands moved down to her ass, pulling her closer, and she scooted up in his lap, feeling a very obvious erection against her thigh. She gasped when his hands started tut at her shirt. “Thought maybe you wasn’t coming.”

“Why?” she asked, bringing her hands down to his to help him bring the shirt up off of her head. Her nipples were hard pebbles in the cool night air, and when his hot tongue slid over one, she was thankful she’d had the good sense to take her bra off before she laid down to wait for everyone to go to sleep. The fact that he didn’t answer might have bothered her, but the way his lips and tongue were teasing her breast was distracting. Her core was throbbing, and bit back a moan when he moved to tease the other breast. “Oh God…” Her hands clawed at his shirt, and she started working with the buttons until he pulled back and quickly lifted it over his head. She reached out for him, wishing she could see him in the darkness. No amount of her eyes adjusting to the dark was good enough. She needed light, but she knew it was too dangerous.

Her hands slid up his bare arms and over his shoulders, and her fingers were gentle against the ridges of his scars. He groaned softly, and Carol pressed a soft kiss to his neck and then to his shoulder, and to her surprise, he grabbed her hips and pulled her legs from behind the knees so she fell back against the pile of blankets on his tent floor. She yelped in surprise, but she could see him crawling over her. His hands were tugging at her pants, and she couldn’t help but giggle when his fingertips brushed over her stomach. He paused for a moment, and then he started tugging again. She lifted her ass, and he slid the pants down her waist, catching the fabric of her underwear and dragging them down too. She moaned, squeezing her thighs together as he tossed the garments aside. She reached for him, but she could hear the metallic growl of his zipper coming down. She shivered, waiting for him as he wriggled out of his clothes, and when he slid his hands up her legs and pushed at her thighs so she’d spread for him, she closed her eyes and braced herself for the delicious ache of him filling her.

But he hesitated. Carol’s eyes fluttered open, and she could see him still kneeling between her legs. She bit her lip and reached out, sliding her hands up his thighs. Her hand barely brushed over his erection, and he sucked in a sharp breath.

“You ok?” she asked, sitting up a little. 

“Yeah,” he managed to choke out, his voice tense and rough. She knew right then something was going to be different tonight. Her heart skipped a beat when he crawled over her, burying his face against her neck. His hand slipped between her legs, sliding through her folds. She was so wet, and he shuddered, his mouth pressing against her shoulder as he pushed two fingers inside of her. Her fingers flexed against his shoulder, and her nails bit into his flesh just enough to bring a little growl from his throat. She arched back as he teased her clit with his thumb, and he continued sucking her neck and nipping at the hollow of her throat. 

He was exploring her, taking his time. Before, it had been raw and intense and passionate. And it still was, but it was as if he was letting himself slow down and indulge, and after their conversation that day, Carol wondered if maybe this was his way of making it last because he wasn’t sure what time they had left together. 

She gently pushed at his hand, and he pulled away like he’d been burnt. 

“I do somethin’ wrong?”

“No. No,” she panted. “I don’t want you to stop. I just...” She ran her fingers through her hair, and she stared up at him, frustrated she couldn’t look into his eyes. Maybe it was for the best tonight. She didn’t want to scare him off, but she needed him to know he didn’t have to worry. “You said you thought I wasn’t coming. Why?” Daryl grunted softly, and Carol reached for his hand, tugging him to lie down beside her. He squirmed for a moment, before Carol rolled onto her side and draped her leg over his hip. He groaned as his dick slipped between her folds. He’d never had a woman want to talk while his dick was so close to slipping inside. His brain felt like it would melt, but when Carol pressed a kiss to his shoulder again, he knew he wasn’t getting out of this one without an answer.

“Thought maybe you changed your mind.”

“Why?” she whispered.

“Don’t know.”

“Bullshit,” she whispered. “You think you’re not good enough.” Daryl said nothing. “You’re good enough. You’re good. Don’t tell me what’s good for me, Daryl.” She shivered as his fingers lazily trailed down her waist and hip. 

“You shouldn’t want me,” he grunted.

“Too late,” she chuckled, sucking his Adam’s apple between her lips, swirling her tongue around it before moving her hand down to stroke his dick. “Since that night at the CDC, you’re in my blood. I crave you.”

“Fuck,” he panted. “Carol…”

“Does that surprise you?” she asked. He said nothing, but he swallowed hard, and she felt it against her lips. “You crave me, too?” He nodded, his hips thrusting as she squeezed him from base to tip. “That scares you.” 

“Ain’t never had somebody look at me like you do. Like I’m some goddamn hero.”

“You are to—”

“Don’t,” he choked out. “You shouldn’t trust me. I’m just gonna fuck this up.”

“You’re doing pretty good so far,” she smiled, kissing his neck again as his hand came up to stroke her breast.

“Don’t know how to do this.”

“Neither do I,” she admitted. “Sex is easy. The rest? I don’t think anybody knows what they’re doing. Some of us…some of us are just more damaged than others. That’s ok, because we find a way through it. We survive. It’s what we do.” Her fingers traced the scars on his back. “I’m scared, too.” Daryl sighed softly, and he slumped forward a little, pressing his forehead against her shoulder. She bit her lip and stroked the back of his neck. 

“Never wanted nobody like I want you,” he admitted. Her breath hitched in her chest, and she let out a soft breath.

“Me neither,” she admitted. Daryl pulled his head back then, and Carol reached up to stroke his face. Her fingers slipped over his jaw line, and she felt him tremble. “Will you kiss me?” His breath stuttered a moment, and Carol’s hands slid up his chest and his neck, and her fingers scraped through his short hair. He came down then, pressing his forehead against hers. She wanted to taste him, but she waited. She gave him time, and when she finally felt his lips, soft and warm against hers, she smiled against his kiss. 

His breath was warm against her lips, and she opened up to him, sucking his bottom lip into her mouth. He traced his tongue against her bottom lip, and when her tongue brushed his, he groaned, and she trailed her hand between their bodies until she curled it around his dick. His hips thrust against her hand, and she guided him between her legs.

He slid into her slowly, and she curled her arms around his neck as he kissed her, sighing softly and relishing the feel of him filling her. She whimpered as her walls stretched around him, and the throbbing between her legs only intensified. He was trembling, and he only broke from the kiss to roll her onto her back. Then his mouth was on hers again, kissing her hungrily as he pumped his hips against hers. 

“Daryl,” she panted, nails scratching at his shoulders. Her toes curled as he pushed into her. She broke the kiss and pressed open mouthed kisses to his neck, trailing her tongue down the side of his throat. 

“You good?” he panted, arching forward and kissing her shoulder before dipping to suck her nipple between his teeth.

“Fuck,” she panted. “Oh, God.” She bit back a cry as his hand came down and his thumb teased her clit again. She bucked her hips, and he grinned around her breast, sucking a little more firmly before letting it fall from his mouth with a wet pop. She mapped a trail down his back with her hands before bringing them around to rest at his hips, gripping him there as he moved. “You feel so good.” He hushed her with a kiss again, and her walls squeezed around him, pitching him close to the edge. She wrapped legs around his waist them, bringing him closer, and she gasped against his lips. “Harder. Please. Faster.” He chuckled then and pulled back, and she whimpered when he slid out of her. “Daryl…”

“C’mere.” He patted her hip, urging her to roll over, and she did so happily, flopping over onto her stomach and raising up onto her hands and knees. He pulled himself up behind her, guiding himself back into her, and she cried out, slamming back against him as he filled her. “Fuck… _Christ,_ I ain’t gonna last.”

“Doesn’t matter,” she panted. “I need it. Please…” She wriggled, and her walls pulsed against him, and he held onto her waist for dear life as he began to thrust harder, faster, pulling her back onto him with each trust, making her cry out each time he slammed up into her. At one point, her arms gave out, and he gathered her up, holding one strong arm around her middle as she leaned back, resting her back against his chest, and she craned her neck to kiss him as his other hand came up to toy with her breasts. She gasped against his mouth, bringing her hand down to rub her clit as he thrust up into her. It didn’t take long before her legs were trembling and an orgasm rocked through her. She fell forward then, back onto her hands, and Daryl pushed into her harder, thrusting into her as her walls continued to flutter around him, and when he came, he huffed her name out against her ear. He pulled out, and they collapsed together on the pile of blankets, slick with sweat and each other’s fluids, panting and reaching out for each other. 

Carol pressed her face against his shoulder as he curled an arm around her waist, and she chuckled softly, trailing her finger tips over the sparse hair on his chest. 

“Oh my God,” Carol murmured. Daryl chuckled then, his chest jerking with each forced breath until his heart began to slow. 

“You ok?”

“I won’t break,” she laughed. “But I like the challenge.”

“Stop,” he snorted. Carol grinned, and she shifted to press her lips to the corner of his mouth. He let out a quick puff of breath before he eased into the kiss, bringing his hand to rest on her waist. He was a good kisser, eager and aiming to please, and she couldn’t help but wonder what other talents he had with his mouth. Still, he pulled back first, and Carol placed her hand against his chest, curling her fingers there, not ready to stop touching him yet. “Don’t wanna hurt you.”

“You won’t.”

“I seen what my daddy did to my mom when I was a kid, and I just…” Carol was glad he couldn’t see her eyes widen in the darkness. It was the first time he’d really spoken about his past, but she didn’t want to scare him from opening up more. She just trailed gentle circles against his chest. 

“You’re not your father,” she said softly, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. “You’re not Ed. You’re you.” His arms tightened around her, and he sighed sleepily. “You’re not gonna hurt me. And I won’t hurt you.” He said nothing after that. And she didn’t press him. They just lay together, touching and kissing, and it was one of the most intimate experiences of Carol’s life. 

It wouldn’t be long, she knew, before she’d have to get up and pull her clothes on and sneak back to the house, but they had some time. And, she was thankful he wasn’t running or pushing her away, because in his arms was the safest place she’d ever been.

_Author’s Note: Thank you guys for reading! I really hope you enjoyed the chapter, and I hope you’ll let me know what you think! Feedback is very much appreciated!_


	9. Chapter 9

Nine

Carol was the first one to wake, so she slipped upstairs to get a much needed shower before the rest of the household woke from their dreams. She noticed the damp towel hung over the rail by the shower and the red handkerchief dropped next to the sink when she first stepped in, and she realized Daryl must have snuck into the house in the night for a shower of his own. 

When she was finished, she dressed and gathered her dirty clothes and Daryl’s handkerchief and took them outside to toss in the washing. 

Daryl was sitting in a camping chair next to Dale’s RV when Carol wandered over. He had his crossbow in his lap and was fiddling with the cable when he heard the crunch of gravel under her canvas shoes. She looked around to see T-Dog and Dale having a chat close by, while Lori was having what looked like a heated conversation with Shane by the barn.

When Daryl looked up at her, Carol offered him a little smile, and she watched his cheeks go pink like the tops of his ears. Carol felt her pulse quicken and her stomach flutter with nerves. The things they did to each other in the dark flashed through her mind. She could tell by his flushed face that he was thinking about it, too.

“Morning,” she chirped, walking past him to get to the RV door.

“Mornin’,” he mumbled, looking back down at the crossbow like he was suddenly concentrating on neutralizing a bomb.

“Sleep okay?” she asked, stepping into the RV long enough to grab the leftover biscuits she and Lori had made the previous morning. She stepped out and handed one to him.

“Good,” Daryl nodded, chancing a glance up at her face. “You?”

“Good,” she nodded, her nose crinkling as her grin widened. Daryl cleared his throat and glanced around.

“You’re up early.”

“Gonna try to find a deer, maybe some rabbit. Fresh meat’s better’n the stale jerky we’ve been chokin’ down. Figure we can dry some of it out, too, take it with us when Hershel kicks us out.”

“Any day now,” Carol said quietly. “Sophia’s getting stronger every day.”

“You ask me, the old man could let us stay, we could move all the way across the property and never seen ‘em.”

“I know,” Carol said softly. “This is his land, though.”

“Don’t seem like that shit matters anymore. Ain’t like somebody’s gonna come arrest us for trespassin’.”

“We can’t just take this place,” Carol said quietly.

“Shane’s already talkin’ about it. Heard him and Rick talkin’.”

“And you agree with them?” Carol asked, narrowing her eyes at him. She knelt down in front of the small fire pit they’d set up. She lit a match and watched the kindling ignite. Then she looked back up at Daryl. 

“I think we gotta protect our own. I get that’s what Hershel’s doin’, but this place is safe. We got kids here. Ain’t right to take ‘em back out there.” Carol nodded briefly and chewed the inside of her lip. 

“I don’t want to take Sophia back out there. That’s the last thing I want. But it’s not worth starting a fight and killing each other to keep a piece of land is it? Has it already come to that?” Daryl glanced up at her, his eyes narrowing briefly, but his attention shifted when Shane came walking over, running his hand through his hair. His face was flushed from his talk with Lori, but he was walking over with a purpose. 

“Mornin’ Carol. Daryl.”

“Morning,” Carol said with a tired smile. 

“Daryl, you comin’ with us today?”

“Coming where?”

“Supply run. There’s a little town not far from here. Hershel says it’s got a drug store, grocery store. Otis was gonna take us in, help us with the supplies. Thought maybe we could get enough to share with the folks here, maybe we can buy us some time.” Daryl shook his head.

“Goin’ to get some supplies of my own. Hoping to bag a deer. Would feed the group for a few days.”

“Alright. Much appreciated,” Shane said with a nod. He nodded in Carol’s direction and headed off toward the barn again. Carol turned her attention back to Daryl. 

“So, when’s my first lesson?” she asked.

“What?”

“You said you’d teach me to shoot.” Daryl took a bite of the biscuit Carol had handed him and nodded. “So, when’s my first lesson?” Daryl chewed his bite for a moment, swallowed and put his crossbow to the side. 

“Maybe we’ll stay here where we got fences. Build ‘em up, fortify ‘em.”

“Maybe,” Carol shrugged. “But I want to learn. We don’t know what’s gonna happen, Daryl. I want to be prepared for…for anything.” 

“Alright,” Daryl nodded, standing up. “Let’s go.”

“What? Now?” Carol asked, taking a step back with wide eyes. 

“Yeah, you wanna learn, right?”

“Y—yes.”

“You sure? You don’t sound sure.” He narrowed his eyes at her, and she swallowed hard.

“I thought you were going hunting.”

“I can hunt anytime,” he shrugged. He stood then, grabbing up his crossbow and slinging it over his shoulder. “You wanna learn to shoot? Let’s go.” Carol took a step backward, her mouth opening and shutting, and she swore she could see a smirk on his lips. “So…you comin’?” His eyebrow arched up just a fraction, but Carol felt her heart skip a beat. Her face grew hot, and Daryl took a step toward her.

Carol turned to see T-Dog glancing in their direction, and he just nodded at Carol and went about his business. She noticed Lori walking away from the barn with a pissed-off, brow-scrunching scowl which softened when Rick poked his head out of their tent. Then there was Shane, leaning back against the barn door with his arms crossed and a shit-eating grin on his face. Everybody was busy with their own separate lives, and nobody seemed to notice the tension between them in that moment. Nobody could see the sweat on her palms or the way her pupils dilated just a little. Nobody knew how her heart was hammering in her ribs at the idea of being out there in the woods alone with him or how her core was throbbing at the anticipation that maybe, just maybe they’d be doing more than just training out there. 

She took a deep breath and forced herself to focus. He was going to teach her how to use a gun, how to protect herself and her daughter, and that was all it was. Thinking about anything else was just going to be a distraction. 

“Okay,” she finally agreed. “Give me five minutes? I need to tell Sophia where I’m going and ask Lori to keep an eye on her.”

“Let’s eat first. Gonna need our energy. Might wanna re-think them shoes.” He nodded to the house shoes she’d been wearing.

“I found some boots when we were searching the cars on the highway.” Daryl nodded.

“Boots are good. Alright. After breakfast, we’ll head out.”

*~*~*~*~*

To avoid drawing walkers with the roar of the motorcycle engine, Daryl had opted to drive the pickup, and they’d gone about five miles out, parked along the side of a leaf-strewn back road and headed into the woods for shooting practice.

She could feel his eyes on her as they walked through the woods. She’d changed into a red tank top and a pair of jeans that looked like they were made for her. She would look back from time to time and catch him staring at her ass, and it made her feel sexy, which was probably the last thing she should have been feeling while traipsing through the woods in search of a place to have target practice.

They finally found a clearing, and when Daryl started pulling weapons out of the bag he’d brought a long, it was all business. He showed her how to hold and load the various firearms he brought, and when Carol chose the small handgun to start her practice with, he made quick work of getting right up behind her and using his hands to guide her arms into position. He’d tap her hip when he wanted her to spread her feet out, and he’d place his hands on her back and waist to change her posture. The whole time, Carol felt like her skin was on fire. Each touch was almost sinful it felt so good, and what made it even more delicious was that he was so into teaching her. 

Carol forced herself to focus. She was as serious about learning as he was about teaching her. She didn’t have any experience with guns whatsoever, and she had a child to protect. So she let Daryl talk, let him explain the more practical uses of each weapon.

And at the end of their lessons, Daryl finally let Carol get a little practice.

She shot off a few rounds with the handguns and then with the shotguns, wincing when the butt knocked against her shoulder. She faltered a few times, and Daryl corrected her position, but it became clear fast that she was a fast learner and a great shot. She hit a tree a hundred yards away dead center on her third attempt. 

“Alright, we gotta head back,” Daryl finally declared after letting Carol pop off a good thirty or forty shots.

“Already?” Carol asked, her exhilaration wilting with disappointment.

“All that noise is gonna draw walkers from everywhere. We don’t wanna be here when they get here. You ain’t ready for that kinda practice yet.”

“Thought you said I was good,” Carol pointed out, putting her hand on her hip.

“You are good.” He took the gun from her, made sure it was safe to pack up and then zipped it up with the rest of the weapons before slinging the pack over his shoulder. “But I ain’t willin’ to gamble our lives after your first day of practice.” He looked over his shoulder. Somewhere not far away, a tree branch cracked on the ground. “C’mon. We gotta go.” Carol quickly followed after him, rushing through the trees toward the highway. 

When they broke free of the tree line, Carol spotted a few walkers about a half mile down the road, and Daryl motioned for her to get in the truck. She climbed into the passenger’s seat, while he tossed the bag full of guns into the back of the pickup. He climbed in, started the engine and tore off back toward home, putting a good two miles between them and the dead before he slowed down. 

Carol eyed him from her seat, and Daryl looked over to catch her staring.

“What?” he asked.

“Did we lose them?” she asked. Daryl glanced into the rearview mirror for a good few seconds before nodding his head.

“Yeah, they probably already found somethin’ else to chase after. They ain’t worried ‘bout us anymore.”

“Good,” Carol huffed out, leaning her head back against the seat. Daryl glanced at her again, realizing she was still breathing pretty hard from their run through the woods. He looked to the road and then back at her.

“You ok?”

“Yeah,” she murmured, wiping her forehead with the back of her hand. “I’m good.” She let out a low hum, and Daryl took a curve, speeding up a little as they came out of it. Carol glanced at dash and then at Daryl. “You in a hurry?”

“Nah, just figured you’d wanna get back.” He eyed her, watching the way her cheeks flushed and the way she caught her bottom lip between her teeth. “You got somethin’ in mind?” Carol stared at him for a moment, and he let up off the gas, training his eyes on the road, only breaking here and there to glance at her, but she was silent. “Hey.”

She took a deep breath and gripped the seat between them. 

“Daryl?”

“Yeah?”

“Stop the car.” Daryl glanced at her then, narrowing his eyes at her, and when he saw the way she was looking at him, he brought the car to an abrupt halt. He slammed it into park, and he turned in his seat to face her, and before he knew what was happening, she was sliding across the seat and tangling her fingers into his shirt. She kissed him hungrily, her tongue slipping between his lips, catching him by surprise. He gasped for breath when she pulled back, and his own face was about as red as hers. Her hand slid down his chest and into his lap, cupping the bulge in his pants. He groaned when she gave him a squeeze, and she leaned in to kiss him again.

“Is this ok?” she whispered against his lips. He answered her with a grunt, sliding his hand up the back of her shirt, tracing his fingers up and down her back. She shivered under his touch. When he pulled back, his eyes were dark, and he was panting for breath, and before Carol knew what was happening, he was getting out of the truck. She looked around, wondering if he’d spotted a walker or something, but before she had a chance to ask, her door flew open, and he was standing there, leaning against the frame, chest heaving with each heavy breath. “Daryl?”

“C’mere.” He reached for her, helping her out of the truck, and as soon as her feet were on solid ground, he brought her in for a hungry kiss. She moaned softly against his mouth, curling her arms around him. He brought his hand down her back and gave her ass a little squeeze, and she giggled against his lips. Her hand moved down between them, pressing against the front of his pants, feeling how hard he was when they’d barely done a thing. She was aching for him, and she could tell she was already soaking wet for him. She squirmed as he nibbled at her bottom lip and was thankful for his enthusiastic, hungry kisses, even if they were a bit eager and overstated. It was hot and passionate, and all she wanted was… _oh God._

As if he’d read her mind, his fingers tugged at her belt loops, but the jeans were too snug they wouldn’t give. Carol brought her hands up and unfastened the button so they had more give, and a moment later, Daryl was sliding them down her legs. She whimpered when his hand slipped between her legs. His fingers slid against her until she was trembling in his arms. 

She backed up against the side of the seat, and she let Daryl lift her up just a little to sit on the edge. A couple moments more of fumbling, and Daryl had his own pants halfway down his ass, and his dick was hard in his hand. When he pushed into her, he kissed her, capturing her moans against his lips, and she gasped as he thrust hard and fast against her. Her legs curled around him, and she grabbed the head rest on the seat with one hand for leverage.

He dragged wet kisses down her throat and over her freckled collarbones, and she tilted her head back, biting her lip as her walls pulsed around his thick cock. She cried out when he slammed into her again, knocking up against her cervix and nearly taking her breath away. The noise she made strangled in her throat, and he pulled back again, but she assured him with hungry kisses that she was just fine. She brought her hand between her legs, toying with her clit as he fucked her.

“Daryl,” she whimpered, squeezing her eyes shut tight, burying her face against his neck. “Daryl, please…” He felt her jerk in his arms, just briefly, and then her thighs were shaking against his hips. He let out a deep groan, unable to hold on any longer. He shuddered when he came, and as he slowed, Carol sought his lips for another kiss. This time, it was tender and slow, and her fingers gently soothed the back of his neck. “Yeah…that’s what I had in mind.” Daryl snorted, and Carol clutched at the back of his shirt, laughing against his shoulder until he pulled back to look at her. 

“You good?”

“I’m good,” she promised, tracing her thumb over his kiss-swollen lips. He was blushing again, and Carol found it endearing that a man who could fuck her up against a truck in the middle of a highway was suddenly blushing like a virgin in the afterglow. 

He pulled out of her then, quickly stuffing himself back into his pants as she eased her own back up her hips. 

“We better get back,” Daryl muttered, wiping the sweat his forehead. “They’re gonna wonder what happened to us.”

“Yeah,” Carol murmured. “I know.” She cocked her head to the side for a moment, narrowing her eyes at him. 

“What?”

“Will you kiss me.”

“What?”

“Will you?”

“Why you askin’ me?” he asked, rubbing the back of his neck. “You don’t gotta ask…” He glanced up at her to see the grin spread across her face.

“I like kissing you,” she murmured, tugging at his shirt to bring him closer. He looked down for a moment, and Carol gently stroked his cheek with her fingertips. “I don’t mean to embarrass you.”

“I just ain’t used to…this. Ain’t used to someone wantin’ to be with me.”

“Neither am I,” Carol said softly. “Ed never looked at me the same after Sophia was born. He looked at me like I disgusted him. But he’d still crawl into bed and…” She shook her head. “He did what he wanted to, when he wanted to.”

“M’sorry,” he said quietly.

“Don’t be. That’s the past.” She took a deep breath and flashed him a hint of a smile. “It doesn’t matter anymore. I’m not his wife anymore. I’m not that woman anymore. I get to be who I was always supposed to be.” Daryl nodded then, chewing the inside of his cheek for a moment.

“Yeah. Maybe I do, too.” He looked around them then, checking for signs of danger, and when he felt confident they were safe for a little while longer, he leaned in and pressed his lips against hers. She smiled against the kiss. His hands rested at her side, and he rubbed little circles against her skin. It drove her crazy, and she squirmed, but when he began to pull back, she chased his lips with her own. 

When they finally took a breath, Carol smiled and hopped back up into the truck. Daryl shut the door for her and came back around to the other side. He got behind the wheel and took a deep breath, trying his best to focus on the road. When he glanced over at her, she was flushed but smiling, and he had never seen anyone so beautiful. 

When he finally dragged his gaze back to the road, he put the truck back in drive and headed off toward the Greene farm, and Carol hummed a soft tune to fill the comfortable silence.

_Author’s Note: Hope you guys enjoy the chapter. I really look forward to reading your comments and hope you’ll let me know what you think of Chapter 9! Thanks for reading!_


	10. Chapter 10

Ten

The last thing either Carol or Daryl expected when they arrived back to the farm was the whole group gathered outside the house. Carol looked at Daryl with worry, and she noticed the way his jaw tensed when he peered out the front window at them.

“What’s going on?” Carol murmured to nobody in particular. She saw Sophia’s face turn toward the truck, and the girl’s eyes went wide. She started limping toward the truck with Carl right behind her. Carol scrambled out of the truck, and Sophia nearly bowled her over with the force of her hug. “Sophia, what happened? Are you ok?” She nodded and hugged Carol tighter. Carol looked down at Carl who was sporting his dad’s Sheriff’s hat. “What happened?”

“Someone died,” he said quietly. Carol’s gaze quickly swept over the group as she tried to figure out who wasn’t there, but Carl beat her to the answer. “It was Otis.”

“Otis?” Carol asked. 

“Yeah, he took Dad and Shane into town, and they got caught.” 

“Caught?” Daryl asked, stepping around the truck. Rick came walking over, blood stains spotting his shirt. 

“A small herd, maybe fifteen of ‘em. They came out from behind the pharmacy, got between us at the car. We had to take off on foot, lead ‘em away, and Otis…he fell.” A sob rose up from the group, and Carol knew it came from Patricia.

“Oh God. Are you ok? And Shane?” Carol asked, hugging Sophia a little tighter.

“Yeah, we got out alright. We tried to go back for him, but they were already on him. Had to lead ‘em off on foot and circle back for the car.”

“Jesus,” Daryl muttered. “That’s bad luck.”

“Yeah. Hershel wants a memorial service. Uh, there wasn’t much left, so Patricia’s gonna bury something that belonged to him. I think it’d make her feel better.”

“Of course,” Carol said softly. She looked down at Sophia and smoothed her hair back. “You ok, sweetheart?”

“Yeah,” Sophia promised. “I’m sad for Patricia. She’s really nice.”

“I know. Me too.” Carol hugged Sophia again, and she pulled her arm around her shoulder. She glanced back at Daryl and gave him a sad smile before joining the group with her daughter. 

Daryl hung back and talked with Rick for a little bit, though Carol couldn’t help but glance up to meet his gaze every once in a while. She knew he was keeping an eye on her, and it wasn’t just because of their physical relationship. He cared. He was a good man, and she never feared for her life when she was with him. He was the kind of man that ran into the woods after walkers to save a child. He was the kind of man to take the time to teach someone who’d never handled a gun before how to stand and aim and shoot. She was grateful that someone was trying, because that hopeless, helpless feeling she’d felt standing on the side of the road waiting for Sophia was not something she ever cared to experience again.

As the day wore on, Carol kept close to the house, helping with the laundry and splitting Patricia’s work around the house with Andrea and Maggie. It was nice, Carol thought, how in terrible times, people banded together and rallied around to help a person. Carol felt grateful for Andrea and Lori’s care and concern when Sophia ran into those woods. If it hadn’t been for the two of them, she wasn’t sure what she would have done. 

By sunset, the group gathered by the fence line, and Otis was eulogized, and a grave marker was placed along the row with Beth and her mother. Carol couldn’t help but feel deep down that Otis’ grave wouldn’t be the last to line that fence, and as she looked around at the people who had become her family since the world went to hell, she couldn’t imagine losing a single one of them. Still, nothing scared her more than the idea of losing Sophia. And now, Daryl. The idea of him getting hurt or worse had her stomach twisting into knots.

After the service, the group headed back toward their makeshift campsite, while Carol and Sophia walked with Hershel and Maggie toward the house. Jimmy had stayed behind with Patricia at Otis’ grave a little while longer, and when Carol turned to glance behind her, she saw Daryl walking to catch up to her. She saw the nervous way he chewed his lip and the way he nodded at her when he realized she’d caught him following her. 

“Hey,” she said softly, as he caught up to her and Sophia. 

“Wanted to make sure you made it back ok.” 

“Thanks,” Carol smiled. Daryl glanced at Sophia, who walked ahead just a little, limping but determined to get there on her own.

“How’s the leg, kid?” Sophia turned her head to look at him before glancing at her mom. She looked back at Daryl and shrugged. 

“Hurts.”

“Yeah. Means it’s healin’, I think,” Daryl said quietly. He glanced at Carol. “Right?”

“Yeah. Something like that,” Carol said with a little nod. 

“Dr. Greene says I’ll have a scar,” Sophia said quietly. 

“Mmhmm. You probably will. Know what that means though, right?” Daryl asked. Sophia shook her head. “Means you survived. You’re still alive, ‘cause you fought to live another day. You’re a warrior.”

“Really?” Sophia asked, eyes widening. “Is that true, Mom?”

“I think he’s right,” Carol said with a smile. “Scars remind you of what you’ve been through. Where you’ve been. But they also remind you to keep looking forward, because you got past the hurt. Now you find a way to live with the reminder of where that came from. In your case, you can tell your grandkids about it someday.”

“About how I got scared and ran into the woods and almost died?” Sophia asked, crinkling her nose.

“Hey, there ain’t nothin’ wrong with bein’ scared.” He watched Sophia flinch, and he remembered the way he’d snapped at Carol when Sophia had cried at the old nursing home in Atlanta. “Everybody’s scared. You just learn how to live with that and use it to stay alive. And someday, you’ll be strong enough to stand and fight.”

“I won’t be scared anymore?” Sophia asked. 

“You’ll probably be scared. That’s good, though, because it means you’re smart. Them things are dangerous. You can’t tell what they’re gonna do next. Ya never wanna be too confident with them things.” Carol reached out and touched his arm as they walked up to the house. She pulled her hand away when Sophia turned to consider Daryl’s words. 

“You weren’t scared,” the girl said softly. “You ran into the woods after us.”

“That don’t mean I wasn’t scared. This group? It’s the closest thing I ever had to family, and family sticks together, right?” Sophia thought for a moment, and then a little grin pulled at her lips. She nodded. Carol chuckled softly, and she nodded toward the house.

“It’s getting late, Sophia. Go in and get ready for bed. I’ll be in soon, ok?”

“Okay,” Sophia said with a nod. She climbed the porch steps, and before she went in, she turned and waved at Daryl. “Good night, Mr. Dixon.”

“Nobody’s ever called me Mr. Dixon in my life. You can call me Daryl, alright, kid?” Sophia blushed and nodded, and she hurried into the house. Hershel and Maggie had beat them to the house, and the rest of the group had made it back to the tents by the barn. Carol looked around briefly, and then she took a step up toward Daryl when she was confident they were alone. 

“Thank you for what you said,” she murmured. 

“I meant it. Kid’s tough. She’s been through a lot.”

“And then some,” Carol said with a nod. “Ed never hurt her, but she knew he hurt me. I couldn’t hide it from her forever, and I wish I could go back and change it. I wish I’d been strong enough to get us both out.”

“Ya can’t blame yourself for that. Wasn’t your fault.” Carol nodded, and she swallowed back that bit of truth. She knew he was right, but it didn’t stop her from wishing things had happened differently in the past. She glanced out toward the field where his tent was undetectable in the darkness.

“I wish you’d stay closer to the house. After today…” She took a deep breath. 

“I’m alright out there,” Daryl promised. Carol nodded, but the way her shoulders slumped wasn’t convincing. “I’ll stay in the barn tonight.” Carol looked up to meet his gaze, and she let out a sigh of relief.

“Thank you.” 

“Mmmhmm,” he nodded. Carol brought her hand up to his chest and she gently curled her fingers into his shirt. She noticed Patricia and Jimmy walking up, and she nodded toward the side of the house, letting go of his shirt. Daryl followed her, and when Carol was confident they didn’t have spectators, she turned and tugged at his shirt, pulling him a little closer. He stiffened at the first kiss but soon relaxed when she curled her arms around his neck. Then his hands were on her hips and moving up her sides and over her back. 

It was a slow, sweet kiss that Carol felt almost drunk on, but she knew if they kept on, they were going to risk giving someone a show. So, when she finally pulled back from the kiss, she kept her hands on his shoulders and cocked her head to the side. A mischievous grin played at her lips.

“What?” he asked, his voice low and soft. 

“Family, huh? Is that was I am to you?”

“Nah,” Daryl murmured, shaking his head. “You…you’re somethin’ else.” Carol grinned then and nodded her head.

“I’ll take that,” she laughed. A moment later, Daryl found his confidence and initiated the next kiss, taking her by surprise and making her moan softly against his lips. When he pulled back, Carol sighed and let go of him. “I should go.”

“Yeah. Me too. Gotta get up early to hunt.”

“Want some company?”

“You wanna hunt?” Daryl asked. He wasn’t laughing. He didn’t think it was a joke. Ed would have laughed his ass off at the idea of Carol traipsing through the woods.

“I want to contribute,” Carol offered. Daryl thought for a moment and nodded.

“Alright,” he agreed. “We’ll leave at first light.”

“Before breakfast?”

“We’ll pack somethin’. Get an early start.”

“Yeah, I’m sure all the good ones will be picked from if we don’t get there early,” she teased.

“Stop,” Daryl snorted. He chuckled then, and Carol leaned in to kiss him once more. 

“Tomorrow morning. First light,” she promised. “Good night, Daryl.”

_Author’s Note: Thanks for reading, guys! Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Please let me know what you think!_


	11. Eleven

Eleven

_Author’s Note: Trigger warning for mentions of spousal abuse and pregnancy loss._

Carol was surprised to find that hunting consisted of a lot of sitting around and waiting and listening. They’d found a good spot about a mile in front the road, and Daryl had sat down on a fallen tree and motioned for Carol to sit with him. He’d opened up a pack of stale trail mix, poured some into his hand and offered her a handful. His crossbow was draped across his lap, and his jaw clenched tight when he stopped to listen.

Occasionally, a squirrel would scurry by. Carol remembered Daryl saying something to Rick back at the quarry about being able to shoot a turkey between the eyes, and she was pretty certain that wasn’t an exaggeration. He’d gotten three squirrels in mid run, killing each of them instantly with an arrow to their skulls. After about an hour, a rabbit came along. Each of his small kills went into an empty pack he'd brought along just for the hunt.

Carol wasn’t sure what to say, but she remembered her grandpa taking her fishing when she was little and how he’d always tell her she had to be quiet or else she’d scare the fish away. So, she said nothing. She didn’t want her boredom to be the reason the group didn’t well that night.

After another twenty minutes or so, Daryl cleared his throat and looked at Carol.

“You’re quiet.”

“So are you,” she pointed out with a little shrug. “I didn’t want to scare the deer away.”

“Gonna have to do this some other time. If there were deer out here, they ain’t here now. I can come back tomorrow, try again.” Carol nodded.

“Are we going back?”

“Yeah. There’s another little town, Collinsville. I saw it on the map. Think they might have a pharmacy? Maybe a grocery store?”

“It’s worth a shot, but Daryl, I’ve never gone on a run before.”

“First time for everything,” he murmured. He stood up then, and Carol started to say something, but the look of concentration kept her from speaking. “There’s a creek nearby. We’ll fill up some bottles, take ‘em back with us to boil.”

“Doesn’t Hershel have wells?”

“Yeah, but the first thing you gotta remember is to be ready for anything. Always carry an extra water. Keep ‘em in your pack, in your vehicle, wherever. You get stuck someplace without water, and you’re gonna be in a world of hurt.”

“Hmm,” Carol nodded. Daryl eyed her.

“What?”

“Nothing.” Daryl nudged her arm as they walked toward the sound of water. She sighed and shrugged one shoulder. “Nobody’s ever actually tried to teach me these sorts of things. Ed stockpiled a bunch of MREs when everything happened, and he had these survival kits. I’d ask him things, and he’d just blow me off and tell me to stay close to him, because I was too stupid to make it on my own.” Daryl stopped then, and he turned to look at her.

“You ain’t stupid.” Carol nodded.

“I know.”

“Yeah, you say that,” Daryl said quietly, “but when ya hear somethin’ enough times, you do start to believe it.” Carol looked away, and Daryl looked forward. They kept walking. “Me and Merle grew up gettin’ told we wasn’t shit. Gettin’ beat up and gettin’ our noses pushed into the dirt. Even after everything, after we grew up, Merle always told me not to expect miracles. Told me to stick with him and not get my hopes up for the job I applied for or whatever else I wanted. We grew up bein’ told we was no good, and we started to believe it.” They stepped out of the clearing and past a few twisted, rotting trees, and then there it was. A narrow stream that bubbled and trickled over a bed of rocks and old wood.

Carol pulled two empty water bottles out of her pack and handed them to Daryl. He crouched down and she watched the cloudy water fill the bottle. He capped the first one and handed it to her, and she watched the sediment swirl like a tornado until it settled at the bottom of the bottle. She stuffed it in her pack and waited for the second one.

“Thing is, as much as we was told we wasn’t gonna be anything or do anything with our lives, my daddy taught me every thing I know about keepin’ myself alive. I hated the son of a bitch, but he taught me a thing or two about stayin’ alive, even if I did go to bed at night prayin’ I wouldn’t wake up in the morning.”

A lump caught in Carol’s throat, and she took the second bottle from him and slid it into her pack. She shrugged the straps back onto her shoulder, and when Daryl straightened, she took a step toward him. She reached out to touch his cheek with her cool palm, and he flinched when he saw her hand coming toward his face. But the second he felt her soft fingertips against his stubbled cheek, he relaxed. Carol took another step toward him and stood on her tiptoes to press a soft kiss to his lips. She felt him gasp at the unexpected kiss, but he brought his hands to rest at her waist. She felt his lips press into hers, and she pulled back slowly.

“What was that for?” he asked quietly, looking down to see Carol’s fingers twisting into the fabric of his shirt.

“We’ve both made it this far,” she murmured. “It’s what we do. We survive.” Daryl nodded. “The only thing that stands in the way of that is the dead. And we’re not them. Right?” He nodded again. “The people that hurt us? They’re not here. We are. We get to keep going. Ok?” Daryl cleared his throat, and he dared to meet her gaze.

“Ok,” he answered. “We best get back. We wanna hit that town and get back to the farm before dark.”

*~*~*~*~*

There wasn’t much to Collinsville. There was a church and a bar and right next to the old post office was an old mom and pop drug store that looked like it hadn’t been touched. Carol waited in the truck while Daryl banged on the glass door, waiting for any sign of walkers. When he motioned for her to follow, she slipped out of the truck and into the store behind Daryl. He shut the doors, and they both took a look around at the nearly full shelves spread throughout the store.

“Daryl, this place is a goldmine.” Daryl chewed the inside of his lip for a moment before nodding.

“Ok. We’re gonna take what we can for now. I’ll mark it on the map when we get back to the farm. We’ll come back and get more when we got more time and more people.” Carol took a deep breath and nodded, following Daryl’s gaze back toward the pharmacy. “You know much about meds?”

“Um, I know about penicillin and things like that.”

“Alright. You start back there. Just grab some shit. Even if ya don’t know what it is, we’ll sort it out later with Hershel.” He reached behind him and pulled a small handgun from the back of his pants. He turned the safety off and handed it to her. Carol held the gun for a moment and met his gaze. “You see anything, you call before you start shootin’.” Carol nodded then, and Daryl led her back toward the pharmacy. He went in first to make sure the area was clear, and then he nodded for her to go in.

He headed off toward the small grocery section, grabbing packs of instant soups and noodles. He went for the toothbrushes and toothpaste and even found a couple bags of candy for the kids. He moved from aisle to aisle, grabbing a little bit of anything he could think of that they might need.

He found shampoo and soap, razors and dental floss. He even grabbed tampons and sanitary pads. Just because the world ended didn’t mean nature wasn’t still going to take its course with the fairer sex.

When he stopped in front of the protruding pegs with multiple packets of condoms hanging from them, he froze. The back of his neck went hot, and he looked up to see Carol making her way over from the pharmacy. She met his gaze, and she offered him a tired smile.

“You ok?” she asked. Daryl opened his mouth to speak, and he shut it again. “What is it?” She shrugged her pack off of her shoulder and moved around to stand beside him. “Condoms?”

“We ain’t used any. Not one,” he pointed out. He looked down at the shelf below. There were multiple brands of pregnancy tests and something called an ovulation kit. Carol followed his gaze, and she cleared her throat. “Shit, we ain’t been very smart about this.”

“Daryl.”

“I mean, we ain’t been careful at all. I mean, I…”

“Daryl, stop.” Carol turned toward the shelf and started grabbing boxes of condoms and pregnancy tests, stuffing them into her pack with the medicines. “I can’t have any more children.” Daryl blinked at her a couple of times before narrowing his eyes at her. She didn’t look at him. She kept grabbing supplies. There were still enough people in the group that some of it was bound to come in handy sooner or later.

“You…you can’t?” he asked. Carol swallowed hard and furrowed her brows as if trying to push something deep down so she wouldn’t have to think about it. After a moment, however, she glanced up at him.

“I got pregnant three times after Sophia. The first time, I had a miscarriage at five weeks. The second one I lost at six weeks after Ed beat me bloody. I got pregnant one more time. Sophia was seven. I lost that one at four months. I fell down the stairs.” She swallowed back the hot, tense lump in the back of her throat and clenched her jaw. “The doctor told me if I ever did get pregnant again, I probably wouldn’t stay pregnant. Something about scar tissue.” And Ed had tried to get her pregnant again. As terrified as she was of carrying another baby she was likely going to lose, she had been powerless against him. But for the last five years of their marriage, there wasn’t even a scare. “That was over five years ago.”

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked. I just…”

“Daryl, it’s ok. I accepted it a long time ago. I love my daughter. I do. But life with Ed was hard. Brutal. Bringing another child into it would have…” She stopped herself and took a deep breath. “It was a long time ago.” She zipped up her pack. “Are you ready?” She looked up at him, her mouth pulled into a frown. Her eyes were brimming with tears though, and Daryl hated that he’d put them there.

“Wish that asshole was here right now. I’d kill him myself.”

“Don’t,” Carol sniffled. “He’s not worth it. It’s not worth it. That’s the past. We have to focus on right now. Five minutes from now. We don’t look back.” Daryl nodded, and Carol put her hand on his arm. “Hey. I’m ok. Ok?”

“I’m…I’m sorry.” He took a step back. “I didn’t know.”

“You didn’t know,” she agreed. “You didn’t do anything wrong. You didn’t say anything wrong. Ok? I’m ok. We’re ok.” He nodded slowly, and she touched his shoulder. “Hey. You heard me?” She waited until he looked her in the eye.

“Yeah.”

“Good. I don’t want you to ever think you can’t ask me something. Ask. If I can’t answer, I’ll tell you, ok?” Daryl nodded, and Carol wiped at her eyes. She cleared her throat and gave him a smile that was somewhere between brave and encouraging.

“Ok,” he agreed.

“Good. Come on. Let’s get back.”

_Author’s Note: Hey guys! Sorry it’s been a minute since the last update. I hope you enjoy this one! Please let me know what you think. Feedback is greatly appreciated._


	12. Twelve

Twelve

Carol and Lori had offered to cook in place of Patricia who was resting and grieving Otis. They’d cleaned and cooked up Daryl’s kills, making sure to season the meat as best as they could. They had plenty of meat for their group and Hershel’s, and everyone sat around the dining room that night at supper just having an all-around good conversation and some laughs. Hershel mentioned how nice it was to hear the laughter of children around the place again, and Carol had noticed the way Rick and Shane looked at each other with renewed hope that maybe, just maybe, Hershel would agree to let them stay.

As the evening wound down, thunder rumbled in the distance, announcing an impending storm. Everyone scattered. Carol noticed that Daryl didn’t. He went outside, but he stayed on the porch chatting with Rick. Every once in a while, she’d look over her shoulder to see him looking at her through the screen door. When he was caught, he’d look away, and Carol couldn’t help but smile.

“I wanted to thank you for the delicious supper.” Carol jumped when Hershel stepped up next to her at the sink. Her soapy hand flew to her chest, and she let out a little relieved laugh when it was just the older man. “I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to startle you. Sometimes I forget that not everybody’s been as lucky in the shelter department as I have.”

“We made do with what we had,” Carol said with a little shrug. She wiped the sweat from her brow with the back of her hand. “This is the nicest place we’ve had to stay since all this started, though. I understand why you’re so protective of it.” Hershel narrowed his eyes at her. A little chuckle fell from his lips. “What?”

“Every time I walk past Rick or Shane, all I hear is how they won’t survive out there. They’re practically begging me to let them stay, and I’m a God-fearing man. I try to do right by my fellow man, and I think I’ve done more than most would in letting you folks stay here.”

“You saved my daughter’s life. If it wasn’t for you and Daryl, she wouldn’t be here. As far as I can tell, you don’t owe me a thing. You don’t owe any of us.” She looked at him and then looked back down at the sink of soapy dish water.

“Why do I feel there’s a ‘but’ in there somewhere?”

“Maybe that’s just your gut telling you you’re having second thoughts about sending us away.” She shrugged one shoulder, and Hershel chuckled.

“That little girl of yours and that boy of Rick’s sure have changed things around here.”

“I’m sorry if they get a little rowdy sometimes.”

“Don’t apologize for that. It’s a nice change.” Hershel rapped his knuckles against the counter top for a moment. Carol glanced at him. He looked like he wanted to say more but was holding back.

“There were more of us,” she said quietly.

“What’s that?”

“Between here and our last camp, we’ve lost a few. Jacqui. Jim. Amy. That’s Andrea’s sister. They were good people. They didn’t deserve to die, but it happened.” She nodded toward the window and looked back to Hershel. “It’ll happen out there. You’ve seen it. Rick and Shane took Otis to town, and Otis didn’t come back.” She grabbed a towel and dried off her hands. “The thing is, it’s happening out there. Everywhere. Eventually, it’ll happen in here, too. If I was trying to protect my home, I’d want as many people fighting for it as possible.” She tossed the towel onto the counter and gave Hershel a little half smile. “There’s leftovers for tomorrow. Good night.” Hershel didn’t turn as Carol left. Instead, he leaned against the countertop and bowed his head.

*~*~*~*~*~*

As it turned out, there was a pretty big leak in the barn, and those who had taken to sleeping there had spread out in various tents and Dale’s RV for the night.

It was dark when Carol stepped out onto the wrap around porch to watch the lightning flash across the sky. The rain was driving down into the dusty earth in torrents, and when Carol looked out toward the field where Daryl stayed, she didn’t see the light in his tent. However, she did see a dim glow of light from the barn.

She wrapped her arms around herself, and shivered. She could hear something coming from the barn. Hammering. She flinched when thunder rolled over head, and she was just about to turn inside when lightning lit up the sky long enough to reveal a shadow slinking along the side of the barn. Her heart caught in her throat, and she looked around. There was a shovel propped in the corner behind the porch swing. She remembered Jimmy had been using it out in the fields and had left it there when everybody piled into the house for supper.

She grabbed it, white knuckling the pole. She could still hear hammering in the barn, and when the lighting streaked across the sky again, she saw the shadow moving toward the open barn doors.

“Daryl,” she whispered. She swallowed back her fear in that moment, and she stepped off of the porch and into the rain. She squinted and shivered as she marched across the lot toward the barn, and as she drew closer, the rain began to pour harder. She kept her eyes peeled for any sign of a walker, but when the lightning flashed again, the shadow was gone. Her heart was still thundering in her chest, but the sound of it was drowned out by the stinging rain.

She nearly tripped over a rake when she rushed into the barn. She let out a cry and caught herself against a stable door. Rustling from the stall shook her to her core. In less than a second, Daryl stepped out with his crossbow aimed right at her. Her eyes flew open, and she dropped the shovel, and Daryl’s eyes went wide at the sight of her standing there soaking wet.

“What’re you doin’ out here?” he asked, lowering his weapon.

“I saw something. A shadow. I thought…I thought maybe it was a walker.” Daryl let out a heavy breath and bowed his head for a moment. He let his crossbow fall into a pile of hay, and he reached around Carol to close the barn doors. The pale light from an oil lamp on the wall cast shadows against the wall. It was either eerie lighting or romantic, but Carol was too wet and cold to consider it.

“You’re freezin’. C’mere.” He pulled her close and rubbed her arms until they started to dry.

“What was that?” she asked. Daryl chuckled a little and ducked his head. He grabbed the lantern off the wall and held it into the stall to show one of Hershel’s cows. “She thought it was bullshit stayin’ out in the fields in this rain.” He closed the stall door to keep the cow from roaming the rest of the night.

“God,” Carol laughed, covering her mouth. “I thought it was…I…” She looked down at the shovel on the ground, and her shoulders shook. “I charged in here with a shovel. What was I going to do? Beat the thing’s head in?”

“It woulda worked. Not as quick as a gunshot or a knife, but it woulda got the job done.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “You ok? You hurt?”

“I’m fine,” she promised. Daryl nodded then, and he swallowed hard when he noticed her nipples poking at her soaked shirt. He cleared his throat and looked away.

“You’re staying in here tonight?” Carol asked, looking around.

“Mmmhmm. Just patched the hole in the roof from inside. It’s good enough to hold tonight. Found a dry corner in the back. Ain’t much, but it’ll do me ‘til mornin’.” Carol nodded her head and listened to the wind pick up and the rain pour harder on the roof of the barn.

“Will you show me?” Carol asked, running her hand over her head, feeling the water droplets slide off with the motion. Daryl nodded and chewed the inside of his lip for a moment, and then he took her hand and used the lantern to lead them through the dark barn.

He stopped in the back corner and hung the lantern on the wall. It gave off enough light to show a blanket and a couple of pillows on top of fresh, dry hay. Another blanket was folded neatly close by, and Daryl reached to grab it.

“You’re gonna catch a cold. Take off your clothes, and I’ll this around you.” In the dim light, she could still see the hint of a blush in his face. She didn’t tease him about it, though. She toed off her shoes and quickly stripped her pants down her legs. She was soaked down to her panties, and she stripped those off, too. She raised her arms above her head and peeled the shirt that clung to her skin, and a soft groan escaped his throat when he realized she wasn’t wearing anything underneath. She took a step toward him, keeping her eyes on his. “Want this?” He held the blanket out to her, and she put her hand over his, pushing the blanket away. She shook her head. Daryl took a step backward and almost tripped over the pillow. Carol giggled when he caught himself and reached out for her, pulling her in close. She looked around at the lighting and the nice little hay bed, and she licked her lips.

“This is pretty romantic,” she teased. “Wouldn’t seem right to let this moment go to waste.”

“No. Wouldn’t.” He licked his parched lips, and Carol started to tug on his shirt. He raised his arms and let her tug it over his head. He shivered when she pressed a kiss to the center of his chest before looking up at him and smiling.

“So? What do you say? You gonna keep me warm?”

_Author's Note: Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think!_


	13. Chapter 13

Thirteen

Thunder shook the barn again, but a damn tornado couldn’t have pried Carol from Daryl’s arms. They lay together atop the blanket, arms and legs entwined. Her hands slid over his chest and abdomen. His moved over her waist and ass. His mouth was hot against hers, and she gasped between kisses each time he slid his dick between her legs. She was throbbing and soaking wet, and he was hard against her thigh.

“C’mere,” he groaned, rolling onto his back and pulling her on top of him. She chuckled against his lips and slid her hands down his chest again. It was usually quick and fast with them, but this time was different. This time, her kisses were long and slow and deep, and every time he chased her lips for one more, she smiled against his mouth and stroked her fingers down the back of his neck. He was hungry for her. He ached for her.

Her hand curled around his cock, and his hips bucked forward. She stroked him from base to tip, and his head fell back against the pillow.

“Fuck. Fuck, that feels…” She smiled and kissed him again, stroking him slowly as she sucked his tongue into her mouth. A low groan escaped his throat, and she broke the kiss to suck the spot between his neck and shoulder. She could feel him tremble, and it made her feel powerful to reduce this strong, feral man into a trembling, yearning mess with just a touch or a kiss.

She pulled back a little, and his head fell back. He dragged his eyes open and gripped her hips. He brought her forward, burying his face between her breasts. He nipped and licked at the soft skin before sucking one between his teeth. He clamped down just enough to make her moan, and he rolled his tongue around the stiff little peak. She cried out when his hand slid between her legs and drew up her slickness with his fingertips.

“Daryl,” she whispered, hands trembling as they trailed down his broad shoulders. “Please…” He took his hand away and her head fell forward. His mouth was hot against the shell of her ear. His tongue slipped against it, and her core throbbed. For as powerful as pleasing him made her feel, he was just as powerful, making her ache for him with just a feather light touch or kiss. She craved him. She needed every bit of him. And she wanted more. She wanted the stars and the moon and an endless night entangled with him and writhing in pleasure until they were both sore and spent.

His mouth was on her neck then, and her knees clenched around his hips. He was so hard, and it would have been so easy to just let him slip in, but there was an excitement in the air. The heady aroma of her arousal and the sweat from their skin and the thick, warm air had her feeling dizzy. She licked her lips and reached for his hands. They were all over her. He opened his eyes when she pushed his arms back to pin them above his head.

“What are you…”

“Shh,” she whispered. She leaned forward to kiss him then, and she pulled back to look in his eyes. She’d never felt so empowered or free to explore with a lover before. The last several years of her life had been an act. She’d been going through the motions and pretending to enjoy herself until Ed was spent and snoring at her side so she could slip off to the shower and wash every trace of him away. But with Daryl, she felt brave. She felt wanted. She felt worthy. She felt like he ached for her in the same way she ached for him.

When he reached out for her again, she gently pushed his hands away. She pressed a kiss to the center of his chest, and his breath hitched when he moved lower. He arched his neck to watch her, and when felt her heavy breasts brushing against his cock, he nearly came undone.

She moved lower, kissing his hipbones, and he reached for her.

“You don’t have to…” She smiled then, and he could just make out the faint hint of a curious smile in the dim light.

“Shh,” she whispered. He groaned when he felt her hand against his cock again, and he closed his eyes. His head fell back against the pillow, and she watched his Adams Apple bob in his throat. She bit her lip, and for a moment, she wondered if she’d be any good. Ed had always demanded it, and he’d made her feel dirty and cheap, and he’d told her on more than one occasion that she wasn’t any good. But, she knew Ed told her lots of things to try and break her spirit.

The groan that escaped his lips the second she took him in her mouth told her all she needed to know. She flattened her tongue against the underside of his cock, and she took him in as far as she could. His hips jumped, and she moaned against his dick, nearly gagging when he hit the back of her throat.

“Fuck. Fuck. M’sorry,” he muttered, dragging his fingers through his hair. He was going crazy and she’d barely done anything yet. She pulled back then, stroking him with her hand.

“Relax,” she murmured. “Let me make you feel good.”

“Fuck, Carol,” he groaned. She gave him no time to recover and took him in again, teasing the head with the tip of her tongue before sucking all the way up. His hips bucked again, and she put her hand on his stomach. His stomach jerked with each ragged breath, and his skin was sweaty against her palms. She took him in again slowly, and he reached out for her. She went rigid when his hand moved up the side of her neck and to the back of her head. She pulled back, and his eyes flew open. He looked down to meet her gaze, and she took a shaking breath. “M’sorry. Did I…”

“It’s ok. I want to. Just don’t touch me there. Not now, ok?” He nodded, bringing his hands to his sides to grip the blanket under him. She kisses his stomach again, her heart thrumming against her ribs. It was the reason she hated doing this to Ed. He always grabbed her by the neck. Not in the gentle way Daryl had touched her, but he’d grab her and force himself into her mouth. In the early years of their marriage, before she’d cut her hair off, he’d grab her tight by the hair. It wasn’t what she wanted to think about when she was with him, and he must have realized her mind was elsewhere, because he brought his hand gently to her cheek.

“Hey.” She pulled away from him, and he licked his lips. “C’mere.”

“But you don’t want…”

“C’mere.” His voice was rough but quiet, and she saw the need in his eyes. The demons from her past were fighting hard to get between them that night, and she was thankful he decided to change things up.

He sat up, and he pulled her into his arms. He kissed her softly, his hand gently resting against her chest to feel her heartbeat dancing against his fingertips. She gasped softly when he shifted to lay her down, and to her surprise, he wasn’t crawling over her. Instead, he spread her thighs with his hands, and he began to kiss her stomach. She knew what was happening, and her thighs trembled. She squeezed her eyes shut and involuntarily covered her face with her hands. The next thing she knew, Daryl was gently prying them away from her face.

“Wanna see you.”

“Daryl,” she moaned, biting her lip as his fingers spread her open and stroked her until she was writhing beneath him. “Oh God. Please…” His mouth was on her stomach again, pressing hot, open mouthed kisses to her flesh. When he settled between her legs, she arched her back and braced for the first touch his lips against her sensitive skin. She heard him take a deep breath, and then his mouth was on her. He was teasing her with his tongue and fingers, and everything felt like it was spinning.

“Taste so good.” The rumble of his voice went straight to her core, and she clenched her thighs around his head. He chuckled then, and she about lost her fucking mind.

“Daryl,” she panted. “Oh God. Daryl, please!” He took his time with her, pushing two fingers in and out of her like he remembered seeing in some of those movies of Merle’s. He lapped at her with his tongue until he found that sensitive bud with the tip, and when her hips jumped up off the blanket, he chuckled and pressed a kiss to her thigh.

She was a trembling, sweating mess by the time he brought her over once with just his mouth. He reveled in the taste of her, rocking his hips against the blanket to ease the pressure in his throbbing dick.

Carol bucked her hips against his chin then, getting his attention, and when he looked up at her, he knew what she needed.

“Come here,” she whispered. He crawled over her then, curling his arms around her. He kissed her, and she moaned against his lips, tasting herself there. And he reached between them and guided himself into her. She cried out and threw her head back when he slid into her slowly and fully, stretching her in the most delicious way.

She buried her face against his neck then, pressing kisses there and gently rocking her hips against his until he started to move.

There was no urgency here. There was this electric energy between them and an overall realization that this was how things were for them now. They didn’t know what time they had left. All they knew was that they had to make the most of what was left, and it didn’t always have to be some frantic, primal fuck.

He rolled onto his back, and she pulled herself up to ride him. She pressed her hands against his chest and sunk down on him, taking him all the way in and feeling him hit her cervix. She cried out softly as she pulled back and sunk back down, and his fingers gripped her hips tight with each downward stroke.

He wasn’t going to last long. Watching her take ride him like that, watching her sink down onto his cock and let him stretch her walls was enough to wind him up.

“Daryl,” she cried out. Her walls fluttered and pulsed around him, and it wasn’t long before he was losing control. He let her ride him at her own pace until the stars burst behind his eyes. And when he finally flipped her over onto her back and drove into her over and over again until her walls were clenching around his cock and her body was trembling, he let go and spilled into her, thrusting through it until he collapsed against her. His damp forehead pressed against her chest, and she chuckled softly, running her fingers through his soaking wet hair. When he turned his head and looked up at her face, she smiled at him and motioned for him to come closer. He did, and she kissed him, whispering sweet words against his lips until he pulled out of her and pulled the spare blanket over them both.

“Want this all the time,” he murmured sleepily, as exhaustion hit him like a ton of bricks.

“Me too,” she smiled against his lips. She yawned and curled into him, burying her face against his neck. The violent storm raged on outside, lulling the lovers into a deep and dream-filled sleep.


	14. Chapter 14

Fourteen

Carol had woken sometime before sunrise, surprised at how heavily she’d slept. She hadn’t slept so good in so long, even since before the world ended. She was warm and sweaty, and her limbs were tangled with his. The oil lamp had long since burned out, and the barn was cool. The warmth from his body had warmed hers, and when she untangled herself from him, the cool air made her shiver.

She hadn’t wanted to wake him. She’d wanted to let him sleep as long as she could, but the last thing she wanted was for him to be woken up by one of the group and have to explain why he was sleeping buck naked in the hay.

She pulled her damp clothes on and shivered when the clung to her skin. She was heading straight in for the shower, anyway, so she didn’t mind. She felt around the walls until she found the oil lamp, and she reached up to find a little packet of matches on the ledge above the nail. In moments, a warm glow filled the little corner of the barn, and she knelt down in the hay beside him.

When she’d left him, he’d rolled onto his back, and now one of his arms was draped across his face. He looked so innocent for a man who’d made her come with his tongue just hours ago. She bit her bottom lip and huffed out a soft chuckle before leaning down to press her lips to his. He moaned in his sleep but didn’t wake.

“Daryl,” she whispered. “Daryl?”

“Hnhhh,” he grunted. Her shoulders shook with a suppressed laugh, and she leaned forward to kiss him again. This time, she gently rubbed her hand against his chest.

“Daryl, wake up.”

“Whassamatter?” he mumbled, rubbing his still-closed eyes.

“I have to go,” she whispered. “It’ll be light soon.”

“You ashamed of me?” he teased, a sexy grin sliding up on side of his mouth. Carol sat back a little. Not the reaction he was expecting, clearly. His eyes flew open, and he sat up a little.

“I’m not ashamed,” she insisted. “I could never be ashamed of you.”

“Hey, I wasn’t bein’ serious,” he said quietly. “I was just teasin’ you.” He leaned in a little, and he pressed a kiss to the corner of her mouth. “I didn’t mean nothin’ by it.” He looked down and pulled a stray piece of straw off of Carol’s pant leg. “You mad?”

“I’m not mad,” she said quietly. “I just don’t want you to ever think I could be ashamed of you.” She placed her hand against his chest. “I’m proud of you. I’m proud to know you. You’re a good man.” Daryl let out a quick breath and shook his head, blushing under Carol’s praise. “I just didn’t think you’d want everybody gawking at you. Or at us.” Daryl nodded then, and he leaned in to kiss her.

“Don’t much like havin’ an audience.” Carol smiled and shook her head.

“Me neither.”

“Don’t much like bein’ the center of attention.”

“Me neither,” she repeated. She looked down for a moment before dragging her gaze back up to meet his. “I spent a long time trying to be invisible, trying not to breathe too loud or take up too much space. I don’t know why I thought that it would do any good.” Daryl’s hand found hers, and he gently traced his fingertips up the back of her hand and up her forearm.

“Spent a lot of time walkin’ with my head down, sittin’ in the back of the room just hopin’ nobody’d see the bruises. I know.”

“You do know,” Carol murmured. “I’m sorry you know.” She reached up to gently brush her hand against his cheek.

“Meant what I said though. I do want this all the time.”

“Me too,” she blushed. “I never met anybody like you before.”

“Never met anybody like you, neither,” he said with a little shrug. “Glad I did. You make the end of the world a lot less shitty.”

“Oh, good. I’ll take that,” she laughed. He chuckled then, and Carol leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. “I need a shower, and I’d rather get one before the rest of the house wakes up.”

“Sure,” Daryl agreed. “We don’t have to tell folks anything. They’ll figure it out for their damn selves, anyway. Besides, it’s like a damn romance novel around here anyway with Glenn and Maggie. Rick and Lori. Lori and Shane.” Carol’s eyes went wide.

“What?!” Carol pretended to be shocked, and Daryl snorted.

“All them trips out to the woods for firewood? We had a whole goddamn stockpile next to Dale’s RV. They were gettin’ wood alright. Just not that kind.”

“Oh my God,” Carol laughed. Her face went red, and Daryl couldn’t help but grin. He’d never been a romantic guy, but damn it if watching her smile and hearing her laugh didn’t make him want to write twenty-page poems about the curve of her nose and the blue of her eyes. She was the most goddamn beautiful creature he’d ever set his eyes upon, and he would never understand how that asshole Ed Peletier couldn’t appreciate what he had right in front of him. “I have to go.”

“Wanna take a walk with me later?”

“A walk?” Carol asked. “Are you…are you asking me on a date?”

“Hard to find any privacy around here,” he muttered.

“Oh,” Carol blushed. “A _walk_.”

“Yeah. Check the perimeter. That kinda stuff.” He cleared his throat, and Carol rolled her eyes.

“I’d love to.” She looked over her shoulder and then quickly back at him. “I should go. You should get dressed.” She kissed him again, and he pulled her close, letting the moment linger just little longer. And when she giggled against his lips and wriggled away, she pressed one quick kiss to his cheek and hurried off toward the front of the barn. As she hurried off, Daryl watched her with a big, stupid grin on his face, and all he could think about was how he couldn’t wait to get her alone again.

 _Christ_ , _if Merle could see me now._

He shook his head and rubbed his hands over his face. He groaned and pulled himself up to start searching for his clothes.

*~*~*~*~*~*

“How can you tell if a boy likes you?” Carol nearly dropped her armful of wet laundry when Sophia lowered the boom on her.

“What?” Carol asked. “Why do you ask?”

“Well, is it true that boys tease you and chase after you and act mean and stuff like that?” she asked, limping along side of her mother with the bag full of clothespins in hand.

“Well, that’s what my mom always told me when I came home crying from school. ‘ _They tease you because they like you_.’” Carol shook her head. “I don’t know. The boys that always picked on me in school were just picking on me to be mean.”

“Oh,” Sophia said slowly. “So if they’re nice and carry things for you and teach you things, they like you?”

“Well, maybe. Or maybe they just want to be your friend.”

“Oh.” Sophia’s face fell.

“Honey, what’s this about?” Carol asked, hoisting the load of laundry into the basket on the picnic table.

“Well…nothing.” Sophia sighed and put the bag of pins down beside the laundry basket. Carol sat down at the picnic table for a breather, and she patted the seat next to her. Sophia brushed her hair out of her face and sat down beside her mother. “Daddy was always so mean to you.” Carol nodded.

“He was.”

“He was mean to me, too.” Sophia looked away. Carol swallowed the lump in her throat, and she put her hand on her daughter’s shoulder.

“Sophia, if you ever want to ask me anything or tell me something, you can. You know that, right?” Sophia nodded. “Sophia, did Daddy ever…did he ever…” She swallowed back the terrible taste in her mouth and cleared her throat. “Did he ever touch you? Hit you?”

“No,” Sophia said with a shake of her head. “He always just yelled at me and told me to be quiet. I always tried to be. And sometimes I’d hear you guys fighting, and you’d cry, and I got scared.”

“That’s over now,” Carol promised her, pulling her arm around Sophia’s shoulder. She kissed the top of Sophia’s head and smoothed her hair down. “That’s the past. We survived that. We can survive anything. Right?”

“Right,” Sophia nodded. “You smile more now. I like when you smile, Mom.”

“I like when I smile too,” Carol chuckled. She patted her daughter’s leg and got up to start putting laundry on the line. Sophia lingered at the picnic table for a minute. Carol looked over her shoulder, sensing Sophia had more to say. “Something else on your mind?”

“Well, Carl’s really nice. He helps carry my stuff since I still can’t walk good yet. And he taught me how to start a fire.” Carol’s eyes went wide, and she turned to look at her. Sophia hopped up in a hurry. “Maggie and Glenn were there. We put it out really fast. Carl just said it’s important.”

“It is important, but I don’t want you starting fires unless there’s a grown up.”

“I promise,” Sophia nodded. Carol smiled.

“Good. Carl’s a good friend.”

“Yeah,” Sophia said slowly. “Mom?”

“Yeah?”

“How old were you when you kissed a boy for the first time?” Carol nearly dropped the wet shirt in her hand. She looked down, and it just happened to be Daryl’s. Her heart skipped a beat.

“Thirteen. Thirteen, I think.” Carol cleared her throat and hung the garment up on the line. She got the faintest hint of Daryl’s familiar scent, and she got goosebumps.

“Really? I’ll be Thirteen soon. I think. Is it still August?”

“First week of September, I think.” Sophia couldn’t help the grin on her face.

“Ok, thanks Mom!” She hurried over to hug her mother before rushing off as quickly as she could with her still-healing leg. Carol shook her head and couldn’t help but laugh as she thought back to that innocent time in her life. Sophia’s life was certainly going to be vastly different than hers. It broke her heart to think about what the future held for her daughter. So much pain and death had already made its way into their group, and there was no hope in sight for things to ever go back to how they once were. But they had each other, and that was enough to give her hope that there was a future. Her daughter could still grow up and be a part of rebuilding the world. It didn’t seem too far out of the realm of possibilities, but Carol knew that time was a long way off. The world was dying, and somewhere out there, there had to be more people like them trying to survive one day to the next.

Carol shook the worries and the daydreams out of her head. There was no use thinking that far ahead, because tomorrow could be the last day. Hell, any day could be the last day. So living in the moment and taking things minute by minute by minute, hour by hour was the only way to survive without overthinking.

When she finished hanging the last of the wet laundry, she started for the house to get a drink of water. When she passed across the lot, she heard hammering again, and he looked over to the barn to see Rick and Daryl both up on the roof, both working in the scorching sun to repair Hershel’s roof properly. Jimmy was standing on the ladder handing them tools and trying not to look down out of fear of falling.

Carol held her hand over her eyes to shield them from the sun, and she found her gaze linger a little longer than she intended. But she couldn’t help but notice the way the sweat dripped down his forehead and how his well-muscled arms glistened in the sun and bulged with each swing of the hammer. He was glorious, and all she could think about was how those same muscles felt under her fingertips when she was holding onto him as he thrust inside of her.

She squeezed her thighs together when her core began to throb, and she gasped when she felt a hand on her arm.

“Oh!” She spun around to see Lori standing there.

“Didn’t mean to startle you. I’ve been calling your name from the porch. Where were you just now?”

“I’m…not sure,” she muttered lamely. Lori stared at her for a moment before deciding not to press the matter.

“Wanna help me make some lemonade and take it up to the boys? They sure look hot up there on that roof don’t they?”

“Yeah, really hot,” Carol sighed, licking her lips and, wiping at her brow again. Lori raised an eyebrow, and Carol’s face reddened. “I mean, it looks really hot. The sun and everything.”

“It’s ok to look. No harm in it. Your secret’s safe with me.” She winked at Carol, and Carol just offered a weak laugh. Lori turned to walk into the house, and Carol covered her face with her hands. Oh, if Lori only _really_ knew her secret. She smiled a little to herself and followed Lori up to the house.

_Author’s Note: Thanks so much for reading, guys! I hope you enjoyed the chapter. As always, feedback is greatly appreciated!_


	15. Chapter 15

Fifteen

“Come on, Sophia!” Carl urged. “Catch me!” Sophia was red-faced and panting as she leaned against the big tree out back of the farmhouse.

“I can’t,” she huffed. “You’re too fast.”

“You always caught me before,” he insisted.

“I can’t. Not anymore.” She wiped at her forehead, and Carl took off toward the barn again. “Carl! Wait!”

“You gotta catch me!” he yelled back. Sophia grunted in frustration and took off after the boy. Carol was sitting in a chair out by the old RV peeling potatoes when she heard all of the commotion. She looked up to see her daughter struggling to keep up with the game of tag Carl had started. Carol knew exactly what the boy was doing. He was trying to help Sophia build her strength and endurance back up. In this world, she was going to need it. She was still walking with a limp, but it was improving every day. Carol was thankful Sophia had a friend to help her.

They’d been on the farm a whole month, which was a lot longer than Carol had expected. She knew it was coming. Any day. They’d be asked to move on. So, she was trying not to get too comfortable. What few personal belongings she possessed were still neatly packed in a bag, and she always knew exactly where that bag was in case things went south and they had to make an escape.

“Hey there, Carol. How ya doin’?” Carol looked up and over at the voice that interrupted her thoughts. She was surprised to see Shane standing there with a bottle of water in his hand. He took a couple of big gulps before pouring the remainder of it over his head. He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed contentedly at the temporary relief from the sweltering heat.

“Just fine,” Carol offered with a little nod.

“You seen Lori?” he asked. Carol had to bite back a little chuckle. The only time Shane approached her these days was to ask about Lori, and she wondered if he realized that.

“Uh, yeah. I saw her and Rick go into their tent about twenty minutes ago.” She saw his gaze flash over toward the tents, and he took a step backward before tossing the empty plastic bottle into the trash.

“You and Sophia doing ok?”

“We’re fine,” Carol said with a little shrug. She narrowed her eyes at him when he chewed at his nails. “You ok, Shane?”

“Yeah. Just fine,” he bit out, clenching his jaw shut before looking back over at the tents. “Hey, Carol?”

“Yeah?”

“You notice Lori acting funny lately?”

“Funny how?” Carol asked. She put down the paring knife and potato and stood up, wiping her hands on a towel.

“Don’t know. Ah, hell, it’s probably nothin’.”

“I wouldn’t worry. She seems fine.”

“Right. Yeah, I’m sure you’re right.” He cleared his throat and ran his hand through his hair again. And just as he was about to walk away, Lori and Rick both emerged from the tent. Lori looked like she’d been crying, and Rick looked like he wanted the ground to open up and swallow him whole. Carol stood then, and Shane took a step away. Lori looked up from across the camp, and her eyes bore into his. She shook her head and stalked off toward the house. Shane kicked at a clod of dirt and turned and marched off toward the house.

“The hell was that about?” Daryl asked, stepping up next to Carol. She jumped a little, and she let out a little laugh. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare ya.”

“It’s ok. I don’t know. Shane kept asking me about Lori.”

“Big surprise,” Daryl snorted. Carol crinkled her nose at him.

“Then Lori and Rick came out of the tent looking like they’d been fighting.”

“Damn, we got Days of our Dead goin’ on around here.”

“What?” Carol laughed.

“Like _Days of Our Lives?_ ”

“Yeah, I know what that is. I’m surprised you know what that is.”

“What? Everybody knows that, don’t they? Shit, Merle’d kill me for sayin’ it, but every time he was nursin’ a hangover, I’d find him spread out on the couch watchin’ that shit.”

“Oh _, Merle_ watched it, huh?”

“Yeah. What? It was on the TV.” Daryl shrugged, his cheeks flushing hot.

“I was more of a _General Hospital_ girl myself. I had a thing for Sonny Corinthos.”

“Ah, you liked the bad boys, huh?”

“How’d you know he was a bad boy?” Carol teased.

“Stahp,” Daryl muttered. Carol couldn’t help but tease him. He was in a surprisingly good mood for not getting much sleep the night before. Sneaking around with Daryl had its many advantages, but the downside was that they didn’t sleep much. They typically slept lightly until just before sunrise before going their separate ways to shower and get ready for the day. Lori and Andrea had both questioned her recently about how tired she’d been, and she’d just shrugged it off by saying she needed to take vitamins. She felt bad that on the last supply run, Glenn had grabbed a bottle of women’s daily vitamins just for her. She took them anyway, figuring there was no harm in staying healthy.

“I’m just trying to stay out of it,” Carol shrugged. “Lori doesn’t talk about it much. I just try to be a good friend. She knows I’m here if she needs me.” She smiled and turned toward him. “You going somewhere?” She nodded to the crossbow draped over his shoulder.

“Oh. Yeah. Me, Rick, Jimmy and Glenn are goin’ out by the creek. Guess there’s a few walkers got stuck in the mud, and we’re gonna go put ‘em down. Ain’t so much a threat, but Hershel don’t like havin’ ‘em so close to the property.”

“Ok. You’ll be careful?” she asked.

“Always am,” he promised. He leaned in like he was going to kiss her, and he hesitated, realizing they were out in broad daylight. Carol blushed, and when Daryl settled for pressing a kiss to her cheek, her heart raced. That was new. It was the first time he’d done that out of nowhere, and when he pulled back, she could see he was anxious and blushing again.

“It’s ok. Nobody was looking,” she grinned.

“Don’t care if they were. ‘Sides, I think everybody’s busy watchin’ a different channel.” He nodded toward the house where Lori was pacing on the porch. Rick was nearby, leaning on the hood of Carol’s Jeep Cherokee, furiously eyeing a map like it had personally insulted his mother. Shane was leaning against the barn door with his arms crossed and his eyes focused on Lori.

“You want me to come tonight?” she asked casually, nudging his foot with her own. Daryl blushed and ducked his head.

“Always want you to come.” His face reddened the second the words left his mouth. “I—I mean…”

“I always want me to come, too,” she teased. “Stay safe.” He nodded.

“You, too.” He brushed his hand over her arm, and his fingertips damn near set her skin aflame. She had never known just a simple touch to get her hot and bothered. At least, not until Daryl. She watched him walk away, and she found herself fanning her face with her hand. She stared down at the bowl full of half-peeled potatoes and silently cursed them. They only served to remind her that the day was still young, and tonight was too damned far away.


	16. Chapter 16

Sixteen

It was close to dark when the guys came traipsing back from the creek. Daryl was covered in mud up past his knees, and there were blood spatters on his shirt. Carol, Lori and Maggie were halfway across the field the greet the guys in a matter of moments.

Glenn looked no worse for wear aside from a rip in his shirt, and his favorite baseball cap was missing. He and Maggie hurried off together. Rick had a big blood stain on his shirt along with mud and muck all over his boots and jeans.

“What happened out there?” Lori asked Rick. He shook his head, and Lori fussed over a deep scratch on his neck. He flinched and ducked away from her touch, but he didn’t seem angry like he had earlier that day. “Jesus, baby, what happened?” He pushed her hand away gently and shook his head.

“It’s nothing. I’m fine. Just took a spill is all.” Lori let out a heavy breath, and she threw her arms around her husband from the side, and they stopped walking until she let go of him. He pulled his arm around her, and she kissed the side of his head.

“I’m glad you’re home. I’m sorry about earlier.”

“Me too,” he murmured. “We’ll get through it.”

“I’m so sorry,” she choked out. “I’m so sorry.”

“Hey. C’mon. Let’s get back.” She nodded, and they walked off together.

Carol was already examining the scratches on Daryl’s arm, her eyes wide and worried.

“They’re not too deep. I can patch them up. Was it…it wasn’t one of them, was it?”

“Nah, we got into some bushes. Thorns and branches scraped us up. Rick got the worst of it. Fell face first into the damn thing. Nobody got bit. Nobody got scratched. Least not by the dead.” Carol gently traced her fingertips along the reddened skin on his arm. She was mindful of the scratches, and she winced when he did.

“Come on into the RV. I’ll get you fixed up.” Daryl just nodded and followed her back toward the RV. Once inside, he followed her over to the little table and sat down. She lit a lantern for extra light and sat it down on the table. She placed the first aid kit on the table and knelt in front of him. He watched as she gently began dabbing at each cut with an alcohol wipe. He sucked in a sharp breath and flinched, and Carol quickly blew over it to ease the sting. She followed up the alcohol swap with some antibacterial ointment. “Well, they’re not bleeding now, so it might be better for them to get some air. If you want, I’ll wrap them for you.”

“Nah, it’s fine. Thank you.” Carol nodded then and stood up. She leaned down then and surprised him with a tender kiss. He blinked up at her when she straightened. “What was that for?”

“I don’t like to see you hurt.”

“Don’t much like to get hurt,” he pointed out.

“Was it bad out there?” she asked. Daryl nodded.

“More of them things than I thought would be there.” Carol sighed heavily, and she reached out to stroke his uninjured arm.

“Is it still safe here?”

“Think so. Gonna go out at first light and check the perimeter again. Thing is, these fences ain’t gonna hold forever. We’re gonna have to find a way to fortify ‘em if this place is gonna last.”

“If Hershel lets us stay.”

“Even if he don’t, this place won’t last if they don’t do something about them fences.” Carol nodded then, and she reached up to stroke the back of his neck. She pulled him and pressed another soft kiss to his lips. When she pulled back, she rested her forehead against his, and he reached out to put his hands on her hips.

“I know you like having your space, but would you please move closer to the house? I worry about you out in that field.” Daryl nodded, and he swallowed hard.

“I’ll sleep up on the porch tonight. Got a funny feeling.”

“Why’s that?”

“Storm’s comin’ in. Saw the clouds rolling in. Don’t wanna stray too far tonight. I just don’t want to—”

“Shane, _stop!_ ” Carol jumped at the loud outburst from outside the RV. Daryl held his hand up and slipped out from between Carol and the table. He moved to the window and looked out to see a couple figures tussling out in the yard. It was almost pitch dark outside, but given Lori’s screams, the only thing he could assume was that Shane and Rick were finally having it out with each other. Whether it was about Lori or the fact that Shane was constantly ragging on Rick for his decisions, it didn’t really matter. What did matter was that this ruckus was going to stir up a hell of a lot more trouble for them if they didn’t quiet the fuck down.

“Hey!” Daryl barked, storming out of Dale’s RV. Shane lunged at Rick, headbutting him in the gut and knocking him down into the dirt.

“Stop it!” Lori scolded as everyone came running from the barn and the house and the various tents.

“What the hell?!” Daryl snapped, rushing over to try to pry the two apart. Somebody’s elbow came up and knocked Daryl in the face. He stumbled backward, and Carol took a step forward. She felt a hand on her arm and looked to the side to see T-Dog standing beside her.

“No use in getting in the middle of that. As tense as things have been around here, I figured it’d come to a head sooner or later.” Carol looked back at Daryl, Rick and Shane and took a step toward her. T-Dog gently pulled her back. “Daryl can hold his own. Just stay back before you get hurt.”

Daryl pushed toward Rick and Shane again, grabbing Rick by the back of the shirt and pushing against Shane’s shoulder.

“Knock it off!” he growled, as everybody formed a circle around them like some high school fight in the cafeteria. “The hell’s the matter with you?”

Shane let out a loud yell and broke past Daryl to lunge at Rick again, and Rick grit his teeth and used his strength to get up under Shane and flip him over in the dirt.

“Stay the fuck down!” Rick yelled, grabbing Shane by the throat.

“You trying to more of the dead our way?” Daryl snapped. “The fuck is wrong with you? You saw what’s out there. You tryin’ to get us all killed, asshole?” Daryl grabbed Rick and pulled him off of Shane. Rick stumbled back in the dirt, but he stayed back this time. Daryl could barely make out Rick’s face in the darkness, but he watched the way he wiped his mouth and spit into the dirt and knew Shane had gotten at least one good punch in.

“Rick. Please, just come back inside,” Lori begged. “Please.” She reached for his arm, and he tugged it away. She held her hands up in the air as Carl came running over.

“What’s going on?”

“Carl—” Shane started.

“Don’t talk to him,” Rick spat. “Leave my family alone, you son of a bitch.”

“Stop! Just stop,” Lori huffed. She grabbed Rick by the arm and started to pull him away. “Carl, get in the house.”

“But—”

“Go on, Carl. Best listen to your mom,” Shane huffed, spitting into the dirt as T-Dog stepped over to help him up.

“I don’t know what’s going on, and I don’t care,” Hershel spoke up, stepping into the middle of the group with a rifle in his hands. “One more outburst like that, and you’re all gone. I won’t stand for this kind of foolishness when the _real_ problem is just beyond our fences.”

“Daddy, does that mean you’re letting them stay?” Maggie asked, curling her arm around Glenn’s.

“Against my better judgment,” the older man murmured with a shake of his head. He looked to Rick and then to Shane. “Don’t make me change my mind.” He turned then and started back toward the house. Glenn and Maggie followed after him quickly, while Shane pushed away from T-Dog and went off on his own.

“What happened?” Carl asked, looking from his mother to his father. Lori just shook her head and ran her fingers through her long, dark hair.

“Nothing, baby. Go inside.” Carl mumbled something under his breath and kicked at the dirt with his shoe, and Rick just put his hand on the boy’s shoulder and guided him away. Everyone sort of scattered, and Carol moved to touch Daryl’s shoulder.

“You ok?” she asked.

“Yeah. Gonna have a hell of a shiner tomorrow,” he grumbled, wincing when Carol gently touched the skin above his cheekbone.

“Daryl, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean for any of this to happen,” Lori insisted.

“It ain’t my business,” he muttered. “Guess I shoulda known better than to try to stick my nose in it.” He turned and walked off toward the house, and Carol shook her head.

“This is a mess,” Lori whispered. “God, this is a mess.”

“You ok?” Carol asked, reaching out a comforting hand toward Lori despite her focus being on Daryl as he walked toward the farm house.

“I don’t know. I don’t.” Carol cleared her throat and turned her attention to Lori.

“You want to talk about it?”

“Talking won’t help.”

“Maybe not, but you might feel a little better. Come on. Come inside.” She nodded toward the RV, turned and started toward it. Lori hesitated for a moment, casting another glance back toward the house before following Carol inside.

Carol handed Lori a bottle of water from one of the cabinets, and they sat down across from each other at the table. The younger woman ran her hands over her face and let out a little groan.

“Everything’s so messed up. I don’t even know where to start.”

“Well, start at the beginning.”

“The beginning,” Lori scoffed. “Yeah, I guess I could start there.” She chewed her lower lip for a moment and nodded. “I sat at his hospital bed, and I honestly wondered if he’d be happy to see me when he woke up. The last conversation we had before he got shot was an argument. Things were bad. I was thinking of leaving him. And I was _so_ close to packing up my things and leaving. And then Shane showed up at Carl’s school and told me Rick was hurt, and everything just stopped. I knew I still loved him. I wanted him to live. I sat by his bed for days until they started sending visitors home. Jesus, he never woke up, Carol. And when Shane came running in the house telling me Rick was dead and they were shooting people at the hospital, I believed him. I did.”

“He was Rick’s best friend. Why wouldn’t you believe him?” Carol said quietly.

“I was scared. Shane seemed to have all of his shit together, you know? He kept me safe. He kept Carl safe. And things just…they just happened. It didn’t mean I didn’t love Rick. I love my husband. I do. Almost losing him made me realize that all of the stupid stuff we were fighting about just didn’t matter anymore. And then he was dead.” Lori looked to Carol. “Before? Before, God, I would’ve been called all the names in the book by the other moms in play group. They would’ve smiled to my face and talked about me the second my back was turned.”

“There’s no time table on grief. There’s also no time table on taking comfort and moving on.” Carol reached out and put her hand on Lori’s arm. “You thought he was dead. You were scared. Everything was crazy.”

“And then…then he _wasn’t._ Carol, seeing Rick come out of that truck was the happiest moment in my life since Carl was born. I was terrified, I was angry, I was hurt, but I was so happy he was ok. I love him. I love my husband.”

“But?”

“But Shane loves me. And Shane thinks I love him.”

“Do you?” Carol’s voice was soft and kind, and Lori blinked back tears.

“I don’t know,” she sniffled. “I want to hate him for lying to me. But it’s not that simple.”

“Nothing ever is.”

“I love Rick. I want to be with Rick. What Shane and I had was over the second Rick stepped out of that truck.” She let out a trembling breath and shook her head. “And I thought it was the end of it.”

“It’s not?”

“I’m pregnant. And there’s…there’s _no_ way it’s Rick’s baby. I know it’s not. I can’t lie to him. And I told him the truth. I told him about Shane. I told him about the baby. And I feel like I need him to hate me. He was hurt. He looked at me like I’d shot him all over again. And he was mad, and we fought.” She sniffled and shook her head. “But he told me he’s going to take care of our family. He’s going to be this baby’s father, and he’s going to protect us.” She huffed out a choked laugh. “He said he’s going to make sure Shane knows he’s not getting between us. That’s about the time Shane walked by and everything went to hell.” Lori let out a heavy breath, and her shoulders dropped a little as if the tension lifted. She looked to Carol and shook her head. “Shane’s not going to stop. He loves me. When he finds out I’m having his baby, he’s not going to stop until…”

“You think he’d hurt Rick?”

“I want to say no. But I can’t.” She shook her head. “Like I said. It’s a mess. I made a mess.”

“Sounds to me like Shane got the mess started in the first place. He had no right to lie to you like that.”

“He was trying to protect me. I know that. If I knew Rick was alive, I’d have walked through gunfire to get back to him. I would have died to get back to Rick, and where would that have left Carl?” She shrugged a shoulder. “I should get back inside and check on Rick. Thank you for listening. I’m sorry for unloading on you.”

“I offered, remember?” Carol smiled. They stood up, and Carol looked at Lori. “For what it’s worth, I’m not judging you. I don’t blame you for how you coped with your grief.”

“Thank you, sweetie. It means a lot.” Lori reached out and pulled Carol into a hug. She let out a soft little laugh and pulled back. “For the record, I’m happy for you.”

“What do you mean?” Carol stuttered, taking a little step back.

“Ed was an asshole, and the world’s a better place without him. Daryl’s a good man.”

“What…what does Daryl have to do with…”

“I’ve seen you looking at him. I’ve seen him looking at you. And, I saw you guys kissing in the kitchen last night when he walked you back up to the house.” Carol’s eyes went wide. “I heard a noise and came down the stairs.” She held her hands up. “Don’t worry. It’s not my business to tell. I just wanted you to know that I’m happy for you. You deserve something good.” She gave Carol a pat on the arm and turned to leave the RV. Carol stood there with her mouth agape, staring in shock at the empty space where Lori had just been standing.


	17. Chapter 17

Seventeen

“Daryl. Unh. _Fuck_. Yes, right there. Oh, don’t stop!” Carol bit her lip to stop from screaming and dug her fingers hard into the sleeping bag in Daryl’s tent. His fingers were digging into her hips as he slammed into her from behind. She met his thrusts with equal enthusiasm, rocking back on her hands and knees, meeting him with each thrust, taking him in a little deeper each time.

His hands moved up her waist and over her breasts, and he finally curled one arm around her middle and pulled her up so her back was against his chest. They rocked together on their knees, and Carol cried out when his hand slipped between her legs. She let out a soft cry when his fingers teased her clit, and her arm came back to snake around his neck. She turned her face up toward him, and he looked down at her for a moment before leaning in to kiss her hungrily.

Carol lurched forward when they both lost their balance, and he slipped out of her. He gripped his cock at the base, and she turned, panting and red-faced, pushing gently against his chest.

“Lay back,” she murmured. He did as she asked, and she crawled over him, kissing his chest and his neck before taking his dick in her hand and slowly sliding down over him. Her eyes rolled back a little when he filled her as far as he could, and she rested her hands against her chest as she began to ride him.

“Fuck, Carol,” he choked out. “Fuck, you feel so good.” Carol smiled down at him, and she quieted him with a hungry kiss. She rocked against him, taking him faster, and when he gripped her hips and sat up a little, she squealed at the change of angle.

“Daryl!” she rasped out. He eased her off of his lap and rolled her onto her back. Gripping her behind the knees, he spread her open and slipped back in, taking her hard and fast, and it didn’t take long before her pussy was throbbing around him, squeezing him and bringing him close. She let go first, and when he finally collapsed on top of her, sweating and spent, she giggled and pressed kisses to his sweaty forehead.

“That was…”

“Yeah,” she panted. “I think I like having you around.” Daryl snorted, and she giggled, giving his ass a squeeze and a slap. Daryl rolled off of her and onto his back. His chest heaved with each labored breath. Carol was already looking around for her discarded panties. Daryl slid his hand up her sweat-slicked back and gently rubbed the back of her neck. His fingers brushed through the short hair at the back of her head, and she shivered. She loved it when he touched her like that. A little smile turned up at the corners of her mouth.

“Got somewhere you gotta be?” he asked.

“No,” she grinned. “I have to pee, and it’s a long walk back to the house.”

“Got a bush outside,” he shrugged. Carol rolled her eyes. “Stay with me tonight.” Carol raised her eyebrows for a moment, considering the invitation.

“Really?” Daryl blushed at her question. He picked at a stray thread on the sleeping bag.

“Wouldn’t ask if I didn’t want you to.” He brushed his hand over her arm, and Carol smiled sweetly. She leaned down to brush her lips against his.

“Let me go back to the house. I’ll use the bathroom and check on Sophia.”

“And you’re comin’ back?”

“I’m coming back,” she promised. The little smile that pulled at his lips warmed her heart, and she gently traced her fingertips over his lips. The lantern light was starting to burn low, and she knew by the time she got back to the tent, he’d be sound asleep, but she wasn’t passing up his invitation for anything.

“Want me to walk you back?”

“I can find my way back just fine. I’ve made the trek more than a few times.” Daryl chuckled at that, and Carol kissed him again. “Try not to fall asleep. I’m not done with you yet.”

“Promise?”

“Promise,” she laughed. She started to get up, but he tugged her back toward him again, pulling her in for a proper kiss. When he finally let her go, he leaned back to watch her throw her clothes back on with a sleepy, satisfied smirk.

Carol put her shoes on last and hurried out of the tent. The night air was cool, and Carol rubbed her hands on her arms to warm herself as she rushed toward the house. The faint light from Maggie’s bedroom window guided her way. She hurried out of the field and into the grassy lot near the barn.

By the time she got up to the house, she was downright shivering. It was the coolest night they’d had for a while, and it was clear that the warm summer nights were quickly coming to an end.

The house was quiet, though she could hear footsteps overhead. She figured Maggie and Glenn were burning the midnight oil, and she was careful when she walked through the house to the little bedroom in the back to check on Sophia.

There was just enough light coming in from the moon to show Sophia’s sleeping form curled up under a quilt. The girl sighed softly in her sleep and turned onto her back, and Carol quietly shut the door so she wouldn’t disturb her.

She grabbed her packing from the living room and took the stairs up to the bathroom. She made quick work of using the restroom and brushing her teeth, and she figured while she was there, she might as well take a nice, warm shower.

Her muscles ached, but her body was still buzzing from Daryl’s touch. She scrubbed behind her ears gently swept the cloth over her neck and down between her breasts. She washed all over, cleansing the grime and sweat away. She couldn’t help but figure this shower would be all for nothing when she got back to Daryl, but it felt good nevertheless.

Her heart skipped a beat when she thought of him, and she found herself holding her breath as she remembered the way he touched her, the way his lips felt against hers, the way he felt buried deep inside of her. Her stomach felt like it was doing somersaults. She felt like a girl with a crush, all giddy and happy every time she thought of him. It was more than that, and she knew it. She’d known for a while. She’d fallen in love with him, and though he didn’t express himself much through words, she knew he cared for her. Sometimes, when he looked at her, she felt warm and safe. Other times, she could see when he was craving her, which was more often than not these days. They were wearing each other out most nights, and she was sleeping better than she had in years.

Two muffled pops broke through the sound of the running water, and Carol’s heart nearly leapt out of her chest.

She turned off the water and grabbed the towel off the rack. She stood there for a moment, listening for any commotion, and when another louder pop broke the silence, she cried out in surprise.

Moments later, several loud footsteps came rushing down the hall and receded down the stairs. Carol quickly dried off and pulled on a fresh outfit, her heart hammering in her chest as the sound of gunfire began to make the windows rattle.

“Sophia,” she gasped, tugging her shoes on and throwing her pack over her shoulder. She rushed out of the room and started for the stairs, nearly running right into Andrea.

“Carol! Come on. We have to go.”

“What’s going on?”

“I don’t know. But there’s walkers everywhere, and the house is on fire. We have to go. We have to go _now_.” Carol gasped and nearly stumbled on the first step. She found her footing and held onto the bannister all the way down. She kept her eyes focused on Andrea until her feet hit the floor downstairs. “Come on.”

“Sophia. I have to get Sophia.” Andrea looked out the screen door, tugging a handgun from the back of her pants. Smoke rolled through the hallway from the kitchen as bright flames cast dark shadows on the wall. Carol coughed and covered her mouth, and Andrea winced and turned away from the flames.

“Okay, hurry.” Gunfire tore through the silence again, and Carol jumped, her hands shaking as she gripped her pack and rushed toward the little bedroom. Her heart leapt into her throat when she saw the door was wide open.

“Sophia!” She stepped inside, only to find the bed empty. “Sophia! It’s mommy! Answer me!” Fear gripped her, but she kept moving forward, feeling around for the flashlight Sophia kept on the bedside table for late night bathroom runs. She flicked it on and waved it around, desperately looking for Sophia in the dim, trembling light. She fell to her knees and looked under the bed. She searched the little half-bathroom off to the side. “Sophia, answer me!”

“Carol!” Andrea stepped into the room. “We have to go. We have to go!”

“Sophia’s gone!” Carol choked out. “I can’t leave her!”

“She’s probably outside with everyone else. We’ll find her, but if we stay, we’re dead.”

“The hell is taking so long in here? We gotta get the hell out!” T-Dog came rushing in. A loud clatter shook the house as the kitchen ceiling caved in just a room away.

“Sophia!” Carol screamed out.

“She got out. I saw her. Think she might be with Lori or Maggie. I saw her, but she was runnin’ fast!”

“She got out? She’s ok?”

“I saw her. I think so. Saw a car peel out, heard them say they were getting back to the highway. Carol, I promise you I saw her.”

“She’s ok? She’s gonna be ok?” Carol was frozen in fear, and Andrea came to her, grabbing her by the hand. She followed her stiffly through the house, and another round of gunfire popped off outside the living room window.

“Stay close!” T-Dog ordered. “Stay with me. We gotta get to the old pickup truck.”

“Sophia!” Carol cried out, as they stepped out on the porch. “Sophia!” The first thing Carol saw was Jimmy out by the barn, surrounded by walkers, shooting to no avail. There were too many of them, and his screams pierced her ears until they sputtered out into silence and the dull din of walkers growling as they tucked into their fresh kill. Carol’s stomach lurched, and Andrea tugged at her arm. “Sophia!” She turned her head toward the field, and her stomach dropped. She tasted bile in the back of her throat when she saw the horde of walkers coming from that direction, stepping through the flames that engulfed Daryl Dixon’s tent. “Oh God…”

The next thing she knew, she was being shoved into the cab of a pickup truck. She was sandwiched between T-Dog in the driver’s seat and Andrea in the passenger’s. Her throat burned, and another sob broke through as the tears began to fall. Andrea put her hand on Carol’s back as T-Dog started the truck and peeled out, clipping three walkers as he rushed down the drive and toward the gates of Hershel’s farm.

The last thing Carol saw through her tears and the smudged rear-view mirror was the orange glow of the farm house that she’d come to call home.

_Author’s Note: I know it’s been a few days, but I managed an update! I hope you enjoyed it. Please let me know what you think. Feedback is very much appreciated._


	18. Chapter 18

Eighteen

**(Trigger warning. This chapter involves a suicide.)**

_Rick poked his head out of his tent at the sound of footsteps on the farm house porch. He heard the screen door creak on its hinges and shut softly, but he couldn’t make out who went in. He looked back into the tent where the soft glow of firelight illuminated Lori’s sleeping face. He ran his hand over his face and the back of his neck._

_“Dad?” He looked over to see Carl stirring in his cot._

_“Go back to sleep, Carl.”_

_“Something wrong?”_

_“No. Just can’t sleep.”_

_“Me neither,” Carl admitted._

_“You cold?” Rick reached for a blanket, and Carl sat up shaking his head. “You feel sick?” Carol shook his head again and swung his legs over the side of the cot._

_“Are you and mom going to break up?” Rick stared at his son for a moment before looking over at Lori sleeping peacefully across the tent._

_“You want to take a walk?” Carl nodded. Rick grabbed the oil lantern and nodded for him to follow him. Carl grabbed his jacket from the end of his cot and followed his father out into the cool night air. They started walking toward the barn. With the nights getting colder, most everyone had opted to sleep either in Dale’s RV or in a tent, as the barn was drafty and damp. The only one who opted for something else was Daryl, who still enjoyed his distance from everyone out in the field._

_“You and mom were fighting really loud.”_

_“Carl, I love you and your mom more than anything. You know that, right?” Carl nodded. “A lot of…stuff happened since I got shot. Your mom…well, she did the best she could.”_

_“You were really mad at her. What happened?”_

_“It’s nothing you need to worry about,” Rick insisted. “Moms and dads fight, and it’s got nothing to do with how much we love you. Ok?” Carl nodded. “No matter what happens, your mom and me want what’s best for you.”_

_“Do you still love each other?” Carl asked, kicking at a rock with the toe of his shoe. Rick paused and knelt down in front of his boy. Even in the pale moonlight, Carl could make out the sincerity in his father’s face._

_“Of course,” Rick assured him. A loud creak from the barn startled them both, and Rick straightened back up, his hand flying to his holster._

_“What was that?” Carl asked, stepping curiously toward the barn._

_“Carl, stay back.” Rick peers up toward the hayloft just in time to see something come fluttering to the ground. It’s straw, he realizes. He heard the distinctive shuffling of feet on the rickety old boards, and he heard a strangled sob before something snapped. Rick held the oil lamp up, trying to brighten the view, but the light was so low it didn’t help at all. Without warning, a pair of legs emerged from the loft, illuminated by the moonlight, twitching as a rope caught, held and then broke under the weight._

_Rick’s first instinct was to shield his son’s eyes, but he was frozen in terror watching one of their people take their own life. Carl let out a loud yell and started forward._

_“No!” He reached out for his boy, but Carl was too quick. Carl knelt next to the still body and pushed at the shoulder. He scrambled backward in the dirt, and Rick rushed to his side._

_“It’s Patricia!” Carl yelled, his voice high and frightened. Rick pulled him back and knelt next to the body. Her neck was turned unnaturally, and her eyes were wide open. He placed his fingers against her neck and bowed his head._

_“She’s gone. Go get Hershel.” Carl gasped and hurried off to the house._

_“What’s going on?!” Dale came rushing out of the RV, shotgun in hand. He’d heard the commotion from Carl’s yells and woken from a dead sleep. He raced toward the dim light of Rick’s oil lantern, and when he stopped cold at the sight of Patricia’s body, Rick stood and put his hand on his shoulder._

_“There’s a note.” He swallowed hard and handed Dale the note he’d just found pinned to Patricia’s shirt. He’d seen a lot of that in his time as a cop, but this was the first time it’d ever hit so close to him._

_Grief. That’s what it was. All the note said was that she wanted to be with Otis. She asked for nothing. She blamed no one. She just wanted Otis._

_“Jesus,” Rick murmured, pinching the bridge of his nose and fighting off the urge to vomit._

_“Was she bit?” Dale asked, kneeling down. Rick shifted nervously and stepped toward._

_“No, I…I don’t think so. We best stay clear.”_

_“Why?” Dale wondered, narrowing his eyes at Rick in the darkness. He turned his attention back to Patricia and gently examined her neck and arms for signs of bites. He saw no blood or wounds. Just the horrible angle of her neck._

_The screen door swung open, and Rick looked up to see Hershel, Maggie and Glenn rushing across the lot with Carl. Glenn held an oil lamp in his hand, and it swung in the darkness, barely illuminating the forms of the frantic survivors._

_“My God, what happened?” Maggie panted, arriving first with Glenn right behind her._

_“We gotta move her. We gotta…” Rick took a step backward, and he ran his hands over his face. “We should bury her.”_

_“Now? In the middle of the night?” Glenn asked._

_“It can wait ‘til morning, can’t it?” Dale asked, standing and taking a step toward Rick._

_“I don’t know,” he murmured. “I don’t know.”_

_“What?” Maggie asked. “What aren’t you saying?” Dale took another step forward, only to feel something tug at his pant leg. He looked down in time to see Patricia’s broken corpse roll toward him, her hands outstretched, her mouth gaping open with that horrible, strangled rasp escaping._

_“Shit!” Rick hollered, pulling Dale toward him, ripping Dale’s pant leg in the process. Dale’s eyes went wide, and he stumbled backward, and just as Rick brought his pistol out, Carl came up between him and Hershel, reached into his jacket pocket and revealed one of the hand guns from the duffel bag. He aimed it right at Patricia’s head and pulled the trigger. The corpse slumped forward, still, and Maggie curled into Glenn, choking back a sob as Rick grabbed the gun from his son._

_“She wasn’t bit,” Dale stammered. “She wasn’t…” He looked to Rick, and Rick shook his head._

_“Jesus. Jesus.”_

_“The hell is goin’ on?!” Shane asked, coming around the back of Dale’s RV, rushing over with his gun in hand, flashlight casting frantic shadows in the dirt._

_Another sound from off in the field turned their attention back toward Daryl’s tent where the dim light barely illuminated the structure in the dark._

_“What the hell is that?” Dale panted. Rick took a few steps forward, and he listened as the sound grew closer. And louder. And then his stomach twisted in fear._

_“Get everybody to the cars. We gotta get out of here now,” Rick choked out. Moments later, the dry, throaty rasps of dozens of walkers came washing over the property like the cacophony of a badly tuned orchestra._

_“Dad!” Carl yelled. “Dad, what’s happening?”_

_“Carl, get your mom. Get what you can and get to a car.”_

_“Glenn!” Maggie cried out, as he started for the house._

_“Sophia’s inside. She’s sound asleep. We can’t leave her. Get to a car.”_

_“I’m not leaving without you!” she choked out._

_“I’ll meet you at the traffic snarl. We get separated, we meet at the traffic snarl. I’ll be there. I love you.”_

_“I love you.” She let go of his hand, and he rushed toward the house, lantern swinging in hand, illuminating the shadows of walkers coming around the house._

_The next few minutes would be a blur of chaos and terror, and nothing would ever be the same again._


	19. Chapter 19

Nineteen

Carol had gotten away. That much he knew. He’d seen a glimpse of her in the headlights of a fleeing car when Andrea and T-Dog rushed her out of the house. He’d been running from six walkers, making a wide arc toward the farm house after he’d knocked his own oil lantern over in his rush to get dressed. He'd heard the moans first, and then the gunshots, and the only things he’d managed to grab were his crossbow and bolts as well as the keys to his bike. The rest of the place had gone up in flames like dry kindling.

He had a handgun on him, but there was nowhere near enough ammo to take down every walker. All it would do was draw more of them, and that was the last thing he needed.

The bike was parked up by the old barn, and Daryl was struggling to get there. He used his crossbow almost like a shield, using it to push walkers out of his way. Some he knocked down, and for those, he brought his boot down hard until their skulls gave and they went still.

Even after the truck had left with Carol inside, he could hear her wailing for her daughter, and his heart about broke in two. He hadn’t seen the girl, but in all of the chaos, she could have been anywhere. For all he knew, she got out with someone else.

What he did know was that they’d made a pact a long time ago to meet back up at the traffic snarl where Sophia had run into the woods should they ever get separated again. He knew if he could just get out, he’d see her again. But if he showed up and Sophia wasn’t there, he couldn’t live with it. He wasn’t leaving that farm until he knew Sophia wasn’t there. If she wasn’t there, that meant she might have made it out, and if she made it out, there was still a chance she was alive.

When he made it clear from the cluster of walkers he’d been pushing through, he could see smoke roiling up through the open kitchen windows, an orange glow tearing from room to room until the whole downstairs was alight. Daryl’s stomach churned, and he pushed past another couple of walkers and made it to the side of his barn where his bike was parked.

He had to step over a corpse to get to it, and when he finally hopped on and turned the engine on, another walker came around the back of the barn, arms outstretched, teeth gnashing in mindless hunger.

Daryl slung his crossbow over his shoulder, and he peeled out of the dirt, turning sharply and heading toward the old farm house. He knocked over more than a couple walkers in his path, and when he pulled up along the house, he let the engine idle and listened for any sign of life. All he could hear was the pop and crackle of the flames engulfing the house and the rasping snarls of the dead.

He listened, keeping a close eye on the advancing walkers. He drove a little past the house, giving himself a little more room. Something crashed in the old farm house, and he knew it was time to go. If anybody was inside, they were gone. What was left of the group would be halfway back to the traffic snarl, and if he didn’t want to get left behind, he was going to have to go, too.

But as he was about to peel off toward the gates, a scream from the fields shook him to his core. Another one came. Another. He shot off toward the fields, speeding past walkers and their clawing hands. He could barely hear the screams over the rumble of the engine, but he knew he was getting closer.

He hit dirt in the field, and it sprayed up behind the bike, and when he finally caught sight of the wooden perimeter fence, he had to make a sharp left to avoid driving into another small herd of walkers. He saw, then, where the wood had rotted through, and the commotion lately from Rick and Shane’s fighting had probably led walkers from miles away in their direction. The breech in the fence had left them all like sitting ducks.

“Help!” The screams were louder, and as Daryl’s headlight flooded the darkness, he searched for the screams. “Help!” When turned again, this time toward the east fence, and that was when he saw a cluster of seven or eight walkers following the screams. That was when he saw her, frightened and gripping the fence as she tried to run. Her unsteady gait made her stumble and fall, and one of them grabbed at her ankle. “No!” She screamed and kick her foot loose from the monster’s grasp. Daryl stopped the bike and grabbed his gun, lifting it high over his head and firing. The walkers chasing Sophia and walkers flooding through the broken fence all turned and made him their next mission.

“Sophia, run! Keep goin’, I’ll come to you!” Daryl yelled. She panted, her dirty face smudged from tears. She was panting and pushing at the ground to pull herself up. “Sophia, go!” He shot at a walker that got too close, and it seemed to make the walkers swarm tighter. They were getting too close, and when Daryl saw Sophia get up and start to run again, he hit the gas and knocked his way through the wall of walkers coming at him. Sophia was running a little faster now, her once-injured leg slowing her down.

“Help!” she screamed again, stumbling as another walker grabbed at her through the fence. Daryl managed to get up close to her, putting a bullet through that walker’s head. Sophia jumped, and he brought the bike close enough that he could reach down for her hand.

“C’mon. C’mon, we gotta get you back to your mom.”

“I’m scared,” she choked out, wiping at her nose.

“I know. Me too.”

“I saw Glenn,” she whimpered. “He came into the house, but two of those things got in. They fell on him. He dropped his lantern. I heard him yell, and I got scared. I just ran.”

“You did the right thing, you hear me? You ran. You survived. Nothin’ you could do.”

“He’s dead, isn’t he?”

“I don’t know,” Daryl admitted, keeping an eye on the walkers that were drawing near. “We gotta go, Sophia. We gotta go!” He reached out for her again, and she took his hand. He helped her up, and she got onto the back of the bike. “You hold on, alright? We’re gonna be ok.” Sophia whimpered and clutched her arms around Daryl. She squeezed her eyes shut tight, and Daryl hit the gas, tearing off away from the farm and toward the old highway that would carry them back to the traffic snarl on the Interstate. All Daryl could hope for was that he’d find _her_ there.

*~*~*~*~*~

Day was just beginning to break when Andrea, T-Dog and Carol made it back to the old traffic snarl. A smoky haze traveled on the breeze carrying smoke from the old farmhouse in their direction.

“Stop,” Carol choked out, tears in her eyes as T-Dog slowed the truck to a near crawl. “Just stop. Nobody’s here.”

“We could be the first ones,” Andrea encouraged. “We had to take three detours just to get back here. Maybe the others are having trouble. They’ll be here.”

“She’s not here,” Carol choked out. “He’s not here.” A hot, sick feeling washed over her, and she started to panic.

“Whoa. Whoa, T-Dog. Stop!” Andrea hollered. T-Dog hit the brakes, and Andrea scrambled out of the truck so Carol could get out. Carol rushed to the side of the road, leaning over the railing and heaving. But nothing came but tears. She coughed and sputtered and thought for a moment she might vomit, but she just choked out a strangled cry, and Andrea hurried over to her.

“Hey,” she soothed. “She’s gonna be ok.”

“She wasn’t there. She wasn’t in her bed. Something must have scared her, made her run.” She shook her head. “I have to find her. I have to…” She let out a shaky breath. “And Daryl was out in that tent. He was…”

“Hey, if there’s anything I know for sure, that’s this: Daryl Dixon can take care of himself,” T-Dog assured her. “He would’ve heard the shots. He had time to get out. Right?” Carol wasn’t so sure. She hugged her arms around herself, and she thought about the fact that if she hadn’t gone back to the house, she’d have been there with him. At least she’d have known if he was alright if she’d stayed. Now she didn’t know where he was, and she didn’t know where Sophia was, and she felt like the world had dropped out from under her just like that day in this very spot when Sophia had run into the woods.

“He’s right,” Andrea assured her. “Let’s just wait. Let’s get in the truck and wait. They’ll be along soon. You’ll see.” Carol took a deep breath and shook her head.

“I can’t just sit around and wait. I need a gun. I need to go back.”

“You’re not going back alone. Are you crazy?” T-Dog asked.

“I can handle a gun.”

“A few lessons in the woods with Daryl isn’t going to keep you alive when a whole herd of those things comes at you,” Andrea explained. “Just wait. If they’re not here soon, we’ll go back together.” T-Dog flashed her a look that told her he thought she’d lost her damn mind, but he said nothing. Instead, he went back to the truck and got back behind the wheel. Andrea took Carol by the hand. “Come on. Let’s go wait.” Carol hesitated a moment longer, before she started back to the truck with Andrea.

Though, before they could slide inside, lights from another vehicle approached from up ahead. Carol put her hand on Andrea’s arm, and the blonde woman stopped.

“T!” Andrea gasped. She pointed ahead, and he rubbed his hand on the dirty windshield, peering out about a half mile down the road.

“Carol, isn’t that your Cherokee?”

“Yeah,” she gasped. “It is.”

“See? I told you they were coming,” Andrea nudged her. “Come on.” She started waving her arms, and Carol joined her, a wave of relief washing over her as the vehicle neared. They started out through the maze of cars in the traffic snarl to meet the other vehicle. All Carol could see was Lori driving, Carl in the middle and Glenn in the passenger’s seat. When the vehicle came to a stop, Carol rushed over, peering in the back windows, hoping to see her daughter and Daryl, but instead, there were just supplies and guns. Her heart sank.

“Maggie? Is Maggie with you?” Glenn asked, holding his arm close against his chest.

“No,” Andrea panted. “What happened?”

“I went in the house. I knew Sophia was there.”

“Sophia? You saw her?” Carol asked. Glenn nodded his head, and he swallowed hard. “There were walkers. They fell on me. Probably scared her. Last thing I saw was her running out the door.” He pulled back a towel to reveal a burn on his arm. It wasn’t severe, but it was going to take some time to heal. It reminded Carol of a burn Ed had given her when he’d held an iron to the outside of her thigh. It had hardly scarred, but the memory remained.

“She ran out?” Carol gasped. “Oh God. Oh God, you didn’t see her after that?”

“I’m sorry, Carol.”

“She’s ok, Carol,” Carl chimed in, getting out of the car alongside his mother. “Sophia’s strong. She got shot, and she lived. I bet she’s with the next group. I bet she’s with my dad.” Lori came around and wrapped Carol in a supportive hug.

“Daryl?” Lori whispered. Carol shook her head.

“I don’t know,” she choked out. “I don’t know where they are.”

“It’s ok. They’ll be here. They will.” Lori gave her a tight squeeze. When she pulled away, Carol wiped at her eyes and took a steadying breath. Crying wasn’t going to help her daughter or Daryl. She had to compose herself, and then she had to convince the others that they needed to go back. Sophia wasn’t getting left behind. Daryl wasn’t getting left behind. Not while she had breath in her body.

The group decided to start scavenging through some of the cars they might have missed the last time they were there, and Carol tried hard to focus on anything but worrying. Still, she couldn’t shake the knot in her stomach every time she thought of Daryl and Sophia and where they might be.

About a half hour later, when the morning sun began to turn the sky a beautiful orange hue, another vehicle arrived, and as it neared, Carol’s hope renewed. But when the doors all opened and only Maggie, Hershel, Rick and Shane stepped out, Carol’s heart sank gain. Carol watched Maggie and Glenn race to each other, embracing the way Rick and Lori had that day at the quarry. This time, when Lori and Rick reunited, Rick buried his face against her neck and breathed deep, holding her close, renewed hope charging through him as Carl came in between them to hug his dad. Shane leaned back against the car with a shotgun in his hands, his shirt torn and bloody, his eyes staring anywhere but at the family reunion.

“Dale?” Andrea asked, looking to Maggie and then to Hershel.

“They caught him just before we escaped,” Hershel admitted. “There was nothing we could do. They swarmed on him.”

“Dale’s gone?” Glenn asked, still holding Maggie tight. She nodded and let out a little sob against his chest.

“Jimmy, too,” Andrea said quietly. In one night, they’d lost Jimmy, Patricia and Dale. And now Sophia and Daryl were missing.

“Where’s Daryl?” Rick asked, pulling back from Lori and Carl and looking to Andrea and then to Carol. “Sophia?”

“I don’t know,” she choked out. Her voice was barely audible, and the tears stung her eyes again. “Daryl was in his tent, and Sophia was in the house.”

“Sophia saw me get swarmed,” Glenn explained to Rick. “She ran. It’s the last time I saw her.”

“Alright, I’m going back,” Rick offered. “Daryl and Sophia may still be out there. We’re not leaving anybody behind. We’ve lost enough in one night. We’re not losing anyone else. If they’re alive, we’re gonna find them.”

“I’m going with you,” Carol insisted, stepping toward Rick. Shane scoffed in the background.

“Carol, you ain’t anywhere near experienced enough to go on a search and rescue.”

“At least she’s _willing_ ,” Lori shot back. “What about you, Shane?” Shane sobered, and she straightened up.

“Look, we barely got out of there alive. I say we give it one more hour, because soon, those things are gonna be here. They’re gonna be hungry. And we don’t wanna be here when all hell comes down on us.”

“Carl,” Rick started, “go wait in the car. “Everybody that’s not coming, get in the cars, wait, and give us an hour. One hour. It’s all I’ll ask for. Who else is coming?” T-Dog stepped forward, as did Glenn.”

“You’re in no condition,” Hershel insisted. “I need to take a look at that wound.”

“I wanna go,” Carl offered.

“ _No_ ,” Lori snapped.

“It’s Sophia,” Carl countered. “She’s my friend.” He looked up at his mother and at his father. “Please.” Moments later, the familiar rumble of a motorcycle motor ripped through the air, and Carol’s eyes went wide. The group turned toward the direction of the sound, and Carol took a couple of steps forward. When Daryl’s motorcycle first came into view, Carol’s hand flew to her chest. At first, all she could see was Daryl riding with his crossbow hooked on the bike. But then she saw two frail arms around his middle, and she let out a sob.

“Oh my God,” she gasped. As Daryl approached the snarl, he slowed to a stop, and Carol took off toward the bike with the rest of the group walking behind her to give her a little space. Sophia slid off the back of Daryl’s motorcycle, and she looked around for a moment before finding her mother running toward her. A wide smile spread across her face, and she took off toward her, her healing leg dragging just a little slower than the other. But she made it to her mother and nearly knocked her over with the strength of her hug.

“Mom,” she choked out.

“Sophia. You’re ok! You’re ok,” she gasped, crying and kissing the top of her daughter’s head.

“I got scared. I’m sorry I ran.”

“No, you did good,” Carol promised. “You’re ok. That’s all that matters.” Carol took a few shaky breaths and hugged her daughter a little harder.

“Sophia!” Carl called. Sophia pulled out of her mother’s embrace and tucked her hair behind her ears.

“Go on. Somebody was worried about you,” Carol whispered. Sophia hurried to greet Carl, and Carol turned to see Daryl throwing his leg over the bike. She covered her mouth with her hand and sniffled, blinking back tears. She watched his face flood with relief. He started toward her, and she took off toward him, running at him as he opened his arms to welcome her in.

“Oh my God, you’re ok,” she whispered. “You’re alive.” She threw her arms around his neck and held him tight. He held her back, taking a deep breath as he buried his face against her shoulder and breathed her in. She buried her face against his neck and let out another sob. “You saved her. You…”

“Knew you got away. Didn’t wanna leave ‘til I knew she was safe, too.” Carol hugged him tighter then, and Daryl looked up to see everybody walking their way. Carol pulled back then, and she framed his face with her hands, smiling through her tears.

“I thought I lost you.”

“I’m right here,” he promised. She leaned in then, pressing her lips against his. He returned the kiss was the same intensity, and when she pulled back, she let out a little laugh, and he rested his forehead against hers.

“I love you.” Her voice was so soft, he nearly didn’t hear her. But when he pulled back to see her blue eyes sparkling up at him, a little chuckle fell from his lips.

“I love you,” he echoed, leaning in for one more kiss.

_Author’s Note: I’m not sure how many more chapters I have in me. I do thank those of you who decided to keep reading, and I hope you enjoy what’s left to come. Thanks so much._


	20. Chapter 20

Twenty

In the time the group had spent at Hershel’s farm, weather and other factors had made some of the roads impossible to travel on. Fallen trees, wrecked vehicles, roads torn up from some sort of altercation involving a semi-truck and an army tank. Finding a decent road without a lot of obstacles took hours.

Daryl was running low on fuel for the motorcycle, so he, Shane and Rick had hoisted it up into the back of one of the trucks. As loud and impractical as a motorcycle might seem, it was good for getting out of a tight spot with a moment’s notice, and it was also good for weaving between cars on cluttered highways.

By nightfall, it was growing cold, and a storm was coming in. The group found an old semi to hunker down in for the night. With most of their possessions and supplies lost at the farm, they had to make due with whatever they could scavenge from surrounding cars. They’d found a few blankets and battery powered lanterns that gave off enough light for them to see each other.

Hershel and Shane had decided to sleep in the cab to keep watch, but for now, they were hunkered down with the rest of the group, passing out what could be shared for supper. Everyone had spread out through the trailer sharing a meager meal of stale crackers and potato chips.

“Mom?” Sophia asked quietly. Carol glanced at her daughter. “Carl says Patricia wasn’t bit. How’d she turn?” Carol looked to Daryl for a moment and then to Rick. Rick looked down for a moment, and he curled his arm around Lori.

“I didn’t want to believe it at first,” Rick began. “What Jenner told me at the CDC right before he…” He cleared his throat. “I told myself it was just the ramblings of a mad man. But he was right.”

“What are you talkin’ about?” Daryl asked, peering across the trailer at Rick.

“He said they’re all infected. Jenner. Doesn’t matter how we die, whether we’re bit or we die in our sleep. We’re gonna turn.” Carol stiffened next to Daryl, and she peered across the way at the leader of the group.

“When were you going to tell us?” she asked.

“I wasn’t sure if it was true,” he explained, holding up a hand.

“You didn’t think to tell us when my daughter was shot? You didn’t thing it might be the right time to bring it up?” Rick nodded then and he cleared his throat.

“I thought about it. But she started getting better, and I didn’t think it was the time.”

“There’s never a right _time_ to tell someone something like that, but it’s pretty damn important, Rick,” Carol spoke up. “Any one of us could catch pneumonia, die in our sleep and then…” She felt Sophia’s hand squeeze hers.

“Carol,” Lori murmured, “it’s late and we’re all tired. We should get some rest before we talk about this.”

“We all could have died today,” Daryl spoke up. He nodded to Carol. “She’s right. We shoulda known about this.”

“Look, I ain’t saying Rick was right to keep it from us, but we’re all still here. We’re still alive,” Shane pointed out. “Can’t say I’ve always agreed with Rick’s course of action on things, but he had his reasons for keepin’ it to himself. Now we know, and we can go forward understandin’ just a little more about how this shit works.” He looked to Rick who nodded to him. “Every last one of us survived tonight, and that means we’re gonna have to work hard to make sure _everybody_ knows how to take care of themselves. That means giving the kids proper shooting lessons. That means teaching everybody to track and hunt and kill. This is the real world now, and if we’re gonna live in it, we have to learn how to survive it.” Shane looked to Lori and then to Rick and finally to Daryl and Carol. “It’s done. We keep moving.”

“Shane’s right,” Andrea spoke up. “I don’t like being kept in the dark, either. I know I can’t speak for everyone, but I know I’ve looked to Rick since he got us out of Atlanta and back to the quarry. We’ve all looked to Rick. If it wasn’t for him, I’d be wandering around Atlanta. I’d be one of those things.” She glanced at Rick. “You have to be up front with us. We got ourselves off of that farm. We’re here, because this is all we know. Don’t keep something like this to yourself again. We have the right to know.” Rick nodded, and he looked to Carol and then to Lori.

“I don’t want to be the guy that calls the shots. I don’t want to be the guy that gives orders,” Rick said quietly. “We make decisions as a group. We vote. It’s the only way this works.”

“Until it doesn’t,” Shane snorted. “We really gonna stand around and waste time takin’ a vote when we got geeks at our back door?” Rick glared at him. “Look, I’m with you, man, but if somebody doesn’t take the lead here, we’re all gonna be dead come Spring. Somebody’s gotta keep the peace around here.”

“You want the job?” Rick asked.

“Hell no,” Shane snorted. “Didn’t much like it back at the quarry. Don’t want that pressure again. You handled it. You came in, and everybody looked to you without a second thought. Somebody’s gotta keep this group together, keep us moving.”

“You saying it’s every man for himself or one man for everybody?” T-Dog asked.

“Think about it, T,” Shane said with a little nod. “Groups are fine, but every group needs a leader. It’s been that way since the dawn of time, man.”

“Why don’t we just get some sleep?” Maggie suggested. “Half of us are dead on our feet. The kids can barely keep their eyes open. Let’s sleep. Tomorrow, we’ll talk about it.”

“I second that,” Andrea agreed. “We’ll all feel better in the morning. Let’s sleep on it and let the rest wait until tomorrow.”

“Best thing I’ve heard all day,” Lori agreed. A few tired agreements rose up from the crowd, and Carol looked to Daryl again. He looked back at her, and she found his hand between them on the cold steel of the semi-trailer floor.

“You ok?” he whispered as everyone started getting comfortable for the night. Shane and Hershel let themselves out and shut the doors securely to keep their people safe.

“Yeah,” Carol murmured. “Just tired.”

“Me too.”

“Thank you,” she said quietly. “This is the second time you saved my daughter. I don’t know how to…”

“It’s what we do,” he insisted. Carol smiled then, and she squeezed his hand.

“Mom?” Carol turned her head and looked at Sophia who was sitting next to her. Sophia looked at her and then at Daryl.

“What is it, Sophia?” Sophia pursed her lips to hide a smile and just shook her head.

“Nothing.” She giggled softly and turned down the lantern beside her. Carol leaned over and hugged her girl before the light went out completely.

“I’m so glad you’re safe,” Carol whispered, squeezing her tight. Sophia turned her head and whispered to her mother in the darkness.

“I really like Daryl.” A smile threatened to brighten the darkness in the trailer as it spread over Carol’s face.

“Me too,” she whispered back. Sophia yawned and moved to lay back against the makeshift bed, and Carol felt Daryl’s hand, warm and calloused, squeeze hers. She scooted closer to him, and he drew his arm around her shoulder.

“She ok?” he asked, as Carol leaned her head on his shoulder.

“Yeah, she’s great,” Carol murmured. She turned her face toward him in the dark and pressed a kiss to his cheek. He turned into her touch and met her lips with his own. She sighed softly against his tender kiss, and he ran his hand slowly up and down her arm.

“Best get some sleep,” he murmured when he finally pulled away. Carol leaned in to press one more quick kiss to his lips, and then she lay back beside him and stared up into the darkness, curling her fingers with his between them. He rubbed his thumb along her knuckles, and she closed her eyes, saying a silent prayer that tomorrow would bring more hope than this cold semi-trailer could offer.

Still, she thought, she could handle anything so long as she had her daughter and Daryl. The two most precious things in the world to her were sleeping safely just inches away. That was all she could ask for, and that was enough reassurance to finally lull her to sleep.

_Author’s Note: Thank you so much for reading! Please let me know your thoughts on the chapter! Feedback is very much appreciated and encouraged!_


	21. Chapter 21

Twenty-One

Carol hated road trips before. Even before the abuse started, Ed was always a bear to drive with. He always insisted on driving, would drive until well into the night, stop at hotels out in the middle of nowhere and insist on getting up early to get as much driving time during daylight hours as possible. And the only time he stopped is if they needed gas or to pee. He also hated driving with music on, so they generally sat there in silence listening to the tires on the asphalt. Carol would often make up little games in her head to entertain herself. And after Sophia was born, she generally spent most of those long drives keeping her quiet so Ed wouldn’t get irritated.

Daryl was probably the best road trip partner she’d ever had. Sophia had found her old collection of CDs under the passenger’s seat, and she hadn’t even asked. He’d noticed her fidgeting with the zipper of the collection case and offered to put some music on for her. The smile that spread across the girl’s face warmed Carol’s heart. She loved seeing Sophia happy, and despite the awful circumstances of the world they were living in, she felt happier than she had in years. It occurred to Carol that if it hadn’t been for the horrible turn of events that brought the group together in the first place, she never would have met Daryl. Ed would still be alive. All things considered, this nightmare of a life was better than life with Ed Before.

When they group picked up at first light and took off, Daryl chose to stay at the back of the caravan. They had a walkie on the dash board that directly communicated with one in Rick’s vehicle up at the front.

After only a half hour of driving, Carol got uncomfortable in the passenger’s seat. When he noticed her squirming, he slowed down a little.

“You ok?”

“Huh?” She stared at him curiously.

“You look like you need a break. Want me to ask Rick to stop?”

“No,” she chuckled. “I’m fine. I just needed to move a little.”

“Mom hates road trips,” Sophia interjected from the back seat. Daryl glanced at her in the mirror and then looked back to Carol.

“You sure you’re good?”

“I’m fine,” Carol assured him. “I’ll be glad when we stop tonight. Whenever that is.” She sighed and leaned her head back against the seat. They all knew when it would be. It would be whenever Rick was ready to stop. Carol wasn’t surprised at all when the leadership conversation took very little time that morning. It was also no surprise that most everyone wanted Rick to lead. Though there was talk of voting and making big decisions as a group, Carol knew in her gut that when it all came down to it, Rick was going to have the final say. That could either be a blessing or a curse.

Carol knew Rick was a good man, but his main priority was his family, as it should have been. She just wasn’t certain that if the time came to make decisions for the group, he would make a choice that was good for everyone, not just his family. She supposed that time would tell. Besides, as long as she had Sophia and Daryl, she had all she could ask for. When it came down to it, if it came to choosing between the group and her family, there was no question which way she would go.

She leaned back in her seat and rested her arm on the rest in the middle. When she felt his arm bump against hers to rest beside it, she smiled. It wasn’t but a moment later that he was holding her hand, and her heart beat a little faster in her chest. There was something about holding hands with him, about kissing him that made her knees go weak. Sometimes it felt brand new again. Those butterflies in her stomach always acted up when he was close. And now that they weren’t sneaking around, she felt almost shy to hold his hand and to kiss him. Those sparks were still there, still simmering just under the skin, but knowing someone was likely watching made her feel exposed.

She could practically feel Sophia’s eyes on them when Daryl ran his thumb over her knuckles. They weren’t doing anything dirty, but Carol had been with Ed so long, and Ed was the least affectionate person she ever knew. She imagined it was a shock for her daughter, and she did feel a little guilty that she hadn’t spoken with her about Daryl a while ago. But, the girl didn’t seem to feel left out about finding out with the rest of the group. If anything, she was just as happy as she was the day she and Carl were chasing each other around the farm.

It wasn’t long before Sophia settled back with a book. Carol never had figured out how Sophia could read in the car without feeling sick, but she supposed it was something Sophia trained herself to do from a young age to avoid being mentally present in the tension-filled drives with Ed.

Carol found herself dozing off before long, and when the car jerked suddenly, her eyes flew open, and she saw Daryl clenching the steering wheel. The cars ahead of him had stopped abruptly. He reached for the walkie he’d put on the dash.

“The hell was that?” he asked. “You hit somethin’?”

“Two cars in the road. We can’t get around. There’s an exit up ahead though. Looks like a truck stop. We’re gonna stop and use the facilities. Grab something to eat. Maybe see if we can pull some fuel. Lori’s feeling bad.” Carol immediately grabbed for the walking.

“Is she ok?”

“Nothing to worry about. We just need to rest for a bit.” Carol nodded then, as if Rick could see her, and she handed the walkie back to Daryl.

“I’m gonna get out. Help them get the cars off the road,” Daryl sighed.

“Be careful,” Carol urged.

“Lock the door.” He opened the door and looked around, seeing no sign of danger before closing the door. Carol hit the automatic lock on her side, and Sophia sat up a little. Carol reached up and turned the CD player off.

“Where do you think we’ll end up?” Sophia asked quietly, resting her chin on the edge of Carol’s headrest.

“I don’t know, Sophia. Hopefully some place safe. Some place we don’t have to keep watch all night.”

“Do you think we’ll find other people?” the girl wondered. Carol gazed out at the back of the car in front of them and leaned her head back a little.

“I’m sure there’ll be more people somewhere. We survived. I’m betting there are groups scattered everywhere doing the same thing we are right now.”

“I hope so,” Sophia sighed. “Mom?”

“Yeah?”

“You _really_ like Daryl, don’t you?”

“I do,” Carol offered with a soft smile.

“Do you love him?”

“I do,” Carol said, unflinching. She turned in her seat to look at her daughter. “Is that something you’re going to be alright with?”

“Yeah,” Sophia said slowly. “He’s not like Dad.”

“No. He’s not like your father. Not at all.” She reached up and put her hand over Sophia’s.

“Will you get married?”

“What?” Carol chuckled. “What on earth made you think of that?”

“I don’t know,” Sophia shrugged. “People that love each other get married.”

“Sometimes,” Carol acknowledged with a little nod. “Not always.”

“I wonder if I’ll get married someday,” Sophia frowned.

“Sophia, you’re only thirteen. You don’t need to worry about that right now.” Carol watched her daughter’s frown fade, but she still looked concerned.

“When I’m old enough to get married, there might not be anybody left.” She slumped back in her seat and opened her book again. Carol slowly turned back in her seat and stared ahead, thinking about her daughter’s words. She had a point. This world was dying and so were the people in it. Carol couldn’t help but think it was going to take a miracle to get the world back to something like it used to be, even if they had to build it back up from scratch. Nothing was ever going to be the same again, and thinking ten years down the road left Carol with that rush of anxiety akin to the second before the first drop on a rollercoaster. What kind of world were they looking forward to? What kind of world would she leave for her daughter to survive in when she was gone? It was a terrifying thought that left knots tightening in her belly.

She jumped when Daryl pulled on the door handle and let it flip back. She put her hand on her chest and quickly unlocked the door. When he slid in, he saw the apprehension in her tense face.

“You ok? Something happen?”

“Yeah. You scared me.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s ok,” she chuckled. “I was in my own little world, I guess.” She put her hand on his. “We ready to go?”

“Yeah, we’re gonna shoot for the travel center a half mile down. If it ain’t overrun, we’re gonna regroup and figure out our next move.”

“It’s a start. It’s something,” Carol said with a tired smile. “Besides, I think we could all stand to stretch our legs for a bit.”

“Yeah. Maybe it ain’t been picked clean. Get some food, some supplies. Maybe it’s one of them truck stops with the shower rooms. Ya know, for those truckers that slept in their trucks?”

“Anything would feel great right about now,” Carol offered with a tired smile. She settled back in her seat and watched the car ahead slowly creep forward. Daryl followed behind, and it wasn’t long before they were coasting down the exit ramp toward a large travel center. Back in the day, it was the kind that had gas pumps for cars and trucks as well as larger ones for semi-trucks. There were signs advertising an all you can eat buffet for just $10.99 as well as showers.

The place looked relatively untouched, but there were cars lined up at the gas pumps, doors wide open and abandoned long ago. The price of gas on the sign was four times what it was before shit hit the fan, and Carol guessed that when they bled the pumps dry, people abandoned their cars and started off on foot. She knew that day would come for them, too, but she hoped that day was long after they found a permanent home where they could start over from scratch and not have to depend on supply runs to survive. They’d almost had that at the farm. Next time, they’d have better fences. Walls, maybe.

They lined the cars up right in front of the doors, parking bumper to bumper so not to let anything get between the cars. Rick had mentioned over the walkie that the area looked secure but they needed to be ready to leave at a moment’s notice, and parking right up along the building would make that easier and keep anything from getting into the travel center.

“I’m gonna go in, help Rick and Shane clear the place.” He reached into the back seat for his crossbow, and Sophia handed him his pack full of bows. “Thanks, Soph.” She smiled at him, and Daryl cast a glance in Carol’s direction, getting a little smile from her in return. “Be right back.”

*~*~*~*

There was a half dozen walkers in the travel center, and it took Daryl, Rick, Shane and T-Dog less than fifteen minutes to put them down and drag the bodies out the back. They did another check of the place including the bathrooms and shower rooms before motioning for the rest of the group to come inside.

“Hot water in the showers,” Daryl announced. “There’s a generator, probably for back-up for the pumps since we’re so close to the Interstate. Folks best cut it down to five minutes in the shower each to be safe.”

“We’ll go in groups. There’s five stalls per shower room. Carol, Lori, Andrea, Sophia, Maggie, you go first. T-Dog, Glenn, Hershel and Shane can take the men’s shower room. Daryl, Carl and myself will scavenge until the first group’s done. Then we’ll swap. When you’re scavenging, go for things that’ll keep. Boxed foods. Canned goods. This place is pretty much untouched, so we should be able to gather a lot.” Rick was pretty good at splitting people up for different tasks, but it remained to be seen how things would go when things got rough on the road. He’d gotten them precisely from the quarry to the CDC where they’d almost died. Then he’d gotten them from the CDC to the traffic snarl where Sophia had almost died. Rick was a good man. Carol knew that much. But she still felt better staying closer to Daryl. She was certain he had what it took to be a great leader, but she knew that was a job he'd never ask for.

Carol followed the rest of the girls back toward the showers, but when she was about to turn the corner, she felt a hand against her arm. She turned to see Daryl standing there, his blue eyes locking with hers.

“Stay safe,” he urged. She smiled then and leaned forward to kiss him. She grinned when he pulled back, and she leaned in to whisper against his ear.

“I’d suggest a replay of our night in the shower room at the CDC, but I’m not one for an audience.” Daryl snorted at that, and the tops of his ears turned red. She kissed him again, and he pulled her in for a tight embrace. She sighed softly and relaxed in his arms, glancing over to see T-Dog and Glenn grinning as they passed by. She giggled when Daryl pulled back. “What was that for?”

“Just been wantin’ to hold you all day. Ain’t gonna be easy to do much more than that for a while, I expect.”

“Well,” she smiled, “we’ll just have to get creative.” She winked at him, and he damn near turned as red as the handkerchief in his back pocket. She passed one quick peck of a kiss over his lips before turning and hurrying off to the showers, leaving Daryl red-faced and looking forward to whatever the hell Carol’s idea of creativity was.

_Author’s Note: Thanks everyone who is still reading this. I appreciate your comments so much! Please let me know what you thought of this chapter. Feedback is very much appreciated!_


	22. Chapter 22

Twenty-Two

Two solid hours at the travel stop had been enough time for everyone to get cleaned up and fed. They packed as many supplies as they could gather into the backs of some of the vehicles. There was a lot of candy and junk food that would do nothing but rot their teeth and ache their bellies, but Sophia and Carl were both allowed one package of candy apiece, because it felt cruel to deprive them of it when it was there for the taking.

They’d managed to pull enough fuel from the pumps to fill each vehicle, Daryl’s motorcycle and four one-gallon gas cans to use as spares. Glenn had managed to unlock one of the pumps using the monitors by the front registers, and when he realized everybody was staring at him, he shrugged and explained that before he delivered pizzas, he worked at a gas station.

Before leaving, Sophia had asked if she could ride with Carl for a while, and while Carol was nervous about Sophia being away from her, she knew Carl and Sophia were the best of friends, and so long as it was ok with Rick and Lori, she wasn’t going to keep her from seeing her friend on a long, boring drive.

The quiet time alone with Daryl was nice. They didn’t talk much. They just listened to the sound of the tires on the roadway and held hands. Every once in a while, Carol would look at him, and he’d lean over a press a kiss to her lips, getting a smile in return before he’d turn his attention back to driving.

They’d decided to try heading south of Atlanta, and while the roads were mostly passable, the drive was long. After the third hour, Carol had grown weary, and Daryl kept shifting in his seat in a way that told her he was worn out from driving. She’s promised to take over driving the next time they all stopped. In the meantime, Carol had decided it was the perfect opportunity to get to know Daryl a little better.

“Look at that house,” Carol murmured, pointing to a big, fancy house up on a hill. Daryl narrowed his eyes and grunted.

“Too much house for me,” he muttered. “Wouldn’t wanna clean it.”

“Me neither. When I was a little girl, I always dreamed I’d have a house like that someday. It’s funny the things you think about when you’re a kid. You always think you’re going to have lots of money and kids and cars and a big house.” Carol glanced at him. “What did you want to be when you grew up?” Daryl chewed on his lip for a moment and shrugged.

“Didn’t think much about it.”

“Oh, come on. There must’ve been something.” She eyed him, and a little grin perked up on her lips. “I wanted to be a ballerina. And a librarian. A pediatrician. And a fireman.”

“Fireman?” Daryl asked with a little chuckle.

“Yeah, but only because Tommy Reynolds wanted to be a fireman. I was six, and I told him that, because I wanted him to like me.”

“Did it work?”

“No,” she laughed. “Not until eighth grade when he asked me to my first dance. He was my first kiss, you know?” She smiled at the memory. “I was convinced we’d be together forever. He broke up with me at the end of the school year, because he was going on a cruise with his parents, and he wanted to be single in case he met someone better.”

“Fucker,” Daryl snorted. Carol laughed.

“Well, he ended up moving away, and I never saw him again. By junior year, I met Ed, and the rest his history.”

“Bet you were pretty.”

“I was all curly, brown hair and freckles,” she grinned. “I was pretty, but not the way the popular girls were. I was never one of them, but Ed liked me.” She slumped down in her seat a little. “I didn’t have a lot of friends. I think that’s why Ed starting coming around. He knew he’d have my attention. The friends I did have, he managed to run off one way or another until it was just us.”

“M'sorry.”

“I wish I knew then what I know now. But if I hadn’t met Ed, I never would have had Sophia. She’s the best thing to come from all of it. I wish I could change what happened, but I won’t ever regret having her, because she kept me going.” Daryl reached over and squeezed Carol’s hand. They drove on in silence for a few moments, and then Daryl let out a little chuckle.

“A rock star.”

“What?” Carol asked with a sleepy smile, rubbing her thumb over the back of his hand.

“It’s what I wanted to be when I grew up,” he pointed out. “’Course, my daddy wouldn’t pay for no guitar lessons, and a cat with a boot stompin’ on its tail sang better’n me, but I figured I’d learn a thing or two, get the hell out of the house and make all kinds of money and never look back.”

“Daryl Dixon, rock star,” she giggled. “With the big hair and the torn jeans.”

“It was stupid,” he snorted. “For about a year or two, I swore up and down that was what I was gonna be. Then I hit puberty, my voice changed, and it _really_ went to shit. Then I decided I best set my sights a bit lower. Figured I’d end up a garbage man or one of them guys that holds the signs while the road crew’s out there workin’.”

“All honorable careers,” Carol pointed out. “Not everybody would be willing to do those jobs. Besides, those road crew guys do ok. They just have to watch out for asshole drivers. When we first got married, Ed worked the road crew. He worked long hours, and I barely saw him. Those were the best years of our marriage.”

“Yeah, Merle,” Daryl snorted. “He sure did get me into a lot of shit I didn’t have no business bein’ around.”

“I didn’t know Merle well, but he sure stuck out. You were the quiet one until he was gone. It’s like you walked in his shadow.”

“Yeah, it’s just been me and him for a long time. The shit we went through when we was kids is enough to fuck anybody up. Merle tried keepin’ a lot of it from me. He was older, so he was out of the house first. He got into drugs. Sellin’ and usin’. And when I took a notion to run off, I’d sleep on his couch, wake up with all these women comin’ and goin’ from his room. Christ, he shoulda just put in a revolving door.” He ran his hand over his face and shook his head. The weariness was setting in. “You know, they talk to when you’re a kid about peer pressure and shit. They talk about folks just offering drugs like it’s nothing. I never touched the shit. I saw what it did to Merle. But one night, one of his tweaked-out buddies wakes me up, grabs me by the shirt and pulls me off the couch. He just fuckin’ slams me into a wall and beats the shit out of me. He accused me of messing with his stash. Split my lip. Broke my nose. I didn’t touch the stuff, but he was whacked out of his mind, fuckin’ paranoid as shit. Folks I grew up around accounted for every pill, every ounce, every gram. They so much as think you touched their shit, they’d put a gun to your head.”

“I’m sorry, Daryl. I’m so sorry you dealt with that. I know your father was…”

“A sadistic piece of shit that deserved every bad thing that ever happened to him? Yeah, that’s the damn truth.” He let out a heavy breath. “Merle weren’t much better. Hell, neither was I.”

“I don’t believe that,” Carol said quietly. “I think you saw all the bad things you grew up with, and you avoided making the same mistakes. Sounds like Merle wasn’t so lucky.” Daryl shook his head.

“Nah. He wasn’t. And I tried helpin’ him, but he’d just push me away, laugh and call me a pussy. Wherever he is, if he made it outta Atlanta, he’s gotta be hurtin’ for a fix.” He let out a dry laugh. “Guess one good thing that came outta this bullshit is now Merle’s gonna be forced to clean up his act, eventually. Ain’t like there’s many tweakers cookin’ anymore.”

“The end of the world got me out of my abusive marriage,” Carol pointed out.

“That’s another,” Daryl said with a nod.

“You know what the best thing is about the end of the world?” Carol asked with a little smile, squeezing his hand. He turned his face toward her for a moment.

“What’s that?”

“It led us both to that quarry. It brought us together.”

“That’s gotta be the best damn thing to come outta this mess. That’s definitely number one.” Carol let out a little laugh, and she leaned back in her seat to look out the window.

“Oh yeah,” she agreed. “That’s definitely number one.”

*~*~*~*~*~*

“No more trains at three in the morning rattling the damn windows and all the knick-knacks on the shelves,” Daryl pointed out.

“Oh, that’s a good one. No more trains stopped on the tracks holding up traffic for a half hour.”

“No more sirens. Police or ambulance. Couldn’t hardly take the sound of it,” Daryl confessed. “Either somebody was dyin’, or somebody fucked up bad enough the cops were comin’. Either way, it always reminded me of when my folks died and all the times the cops came to haul Merle off to jail.”

“No more rude, entitled people at the grocery store. Do you know how many times I just wanted to yell ‘the coupon’s expired, lady. Get over it!’” Daryl laughed at that one. “I hated grocery shopping, but I did it anyway just to get out of the house and away from Ed.”

“No more assholes cutting you off on the freeway,” Daryl pointed out.

This new game, finding the good things about the end of the world, had made for an enlightening and sometimes hilarious hour and a half, and when the caravan began to slow again, Daryl reached for his walkie.

“What’s goin’ on up there?” he asked.

“Might have found a place to stay for the night.”

“What’d you see?” Static crackled on the walkie for a moment before Rick’s voice came through again.

“Saw signs for this fancy private boarding school. One that rich folks pay lots of money to ship their kids off to. Schools closed first thing when all this started. Might be something worth looking into. Either way, it’s better’n sleepin in a semi-trailer. Worth a shot, right?”

“Yeah,” Daryl agreed, glancing at Carol who looked both relieved and exhausted. “Good call. How far?”

“Next sign says…ten miles.”

“Ten miles,” Daryl agreed. “Let’s check it out.” He put the walkie back on the dash.

“A school? Daryl, if it’s a private school, it’s probably one of those gated ones. You know, so the kids don’t think about running off? If there’s a gate, there’s walls. It might be some place to stay for a while. Not just a couple nights.”

“Might be,” Daryl agreed with a nod. “Guess we’ll have to see the place first.” Carol sat up a little in her seat, looking around as the sun dipped low in the western sky. She anxiously wrung the hem of her shirt between her fingers, and when Shane put his turn signal on, she took a deep breath.

Before long, they were pulling up outside the gates of a big, old school. _Claypool Advancement Academy, where the future is ours!_ The banner that had torn in one corner and now hung by one rusty hinge was torn and flapped in the wind.

“Looks like a damn prison for kids,” he muttered, staring up at the three tall brick buildings behind the gates. Dormitories. A larger building behind the dorms bore the same name as on the banner. Carol felt her stomach sink at the thought of sending her daughter away to school. She couldn’t imagine even considering it. She never would have heard of her child being raised by a bunch of teachers and aides.

She and Daryl got out of the car. Andrea and T-Dog came to stand watch, each armed with a hand gun. Carol and Daryl moved toward Rick, Lori and the kids. Rick curled his hands around the steel bars and shook it, sending a grinding, metallic sound through the air. Carol cringed and flinched, and Glenn sighed heavily, rubbing the bandage over his sore arm.

“How do you propose getting in?” Hershel asked, staring at Rick with the utmost confidence despite the concern in his voice.

“A place like this is gonna have a generator. These gates are electric.” He nodded to a guard station just inside. “I’m willing to bet the controls are in there. If I can get in and get it going, we might have a chance of getting in tonight.”

“How are _you_ getting in?” Lori asked, crossing her arms and staring at her husband. Rick looked up at the tall, brick wall and then at the gate.

“Somebody give me a boost. If I can get over the gate, get my feet on the ground, I can figure out how to get us all in.”

“And if there’s walkers?” Shane asked.

“If there were walkers wandering around, they’d be here by now,” Carol pointed out. She moved up to the gate and banged her hand against the metal bars. “Of course, that doesn’t account for what’s _inside_ the buildings.” Rick considered that for a moment before looking at Shane.

“Good enough for you?”

“Good enough for me,” Shane agreed. “You’ll need backup.” He started to move toward Rick, but Rick nodded to Daryl.

“You any good at climbing?”

“Spent half my childhood climbin’ trees and deer blinds. I got your back,” Daryl agreed. He glanced at Carol. “Best everybody waits in the cars ‘til we come back.”

“Daryl’s right,” Rick agreed. He looked to his son. “Carl, any sign of walkers, you honk that horn, and you get your gun ready, alright? We’ll come runnin’.” Carl nodded then, his young face filled with the confidence of a man many years his senior.

“Come on, Sophia,” Carl urged, taking her hand and leading her back to the car. Carol followed with Lori, climbing into the backseat Shane and Hershel both worked to help Rick and Daryl with that first hoist up the gate. Carol watched with baited breath as Daryl and Rick both started up. She couldn’t blink or breathe for what felt like forever, and when they finally straddled the gate and started down the other side, she felt a new wave of anxiety hit her. Who knew what they would find once they got inside and started going through those buildings.

One thing was for sure, Carol knew as she looked around the deserted road around them, was that anything had to be better than spending the night out in the open with only a few inches of glass and steel from their car doors to protect them from the horrors of the new world. Besides, maybe this place was safe. Maybe it _could_ be a place they could stay for a while. Whatever the case was, Carol knew this was their only shot at getting a much-needed good night’s sleep tonight.

_Author’s Note: Thanks so much for reading! Your feedback means so much to me! I really hope you all continue to read and enjoy! Please let me know what you think of this chapter. Feedback is always appreciated._


	23. Chapter 23

Twenty-Three

It took almost forty-five minutes for any sign of life to appear from within the walls of the boarding school. A security light outside the security guard’s shack lit up like Christmas before a loud popping sound filled the air and the light burnt out. The gates began to creak and groan as they swung open. Lori, Maggie, Hershel and Shane drove the vehicles through the gates, and when they swung shut with a loud clang behind them, Daryl came walking out of the guard shack.

“We checked all around the perimeter. Weren’t no walkers. First floor of the first dorm is cleared. Found two of ‘em in the lobby. Put ‘em down and dragged ‘em out back. Might be more upstairs, but the place is secure so long as nobody opens the doors to the stair wells. Tomorrow, we’re gonna make a sweep through the rest of the building, check out what we can. We’ll go through the other buildings and the school, see what we can find.”

“It’s safe,” Carol deduced. He nodded.

“Rick’s checkin’ the generator, but there ain’t much juice. Plus, the damn thing’s almost busted.”

“Can it be fixed?”

“Don’t know. Probably get a better look at it when we got more light. But we’re safe for the night, gonna have a roof over our heads. Beds. Gonna be cold, but there’s plenty of blankets.”

“I don’t even care,” Maggie groaned, stretching as Glenn put his arm around her. “I just needed out of that car.”

“Hope ya’ll like bunkbeds,” Daryl snorted, glancing over in Maggie and Glenn’s direction. Maggie was too tired to blush, and Glenn just bit back a grin. Carol caught up to Daryl and slipped her hand into his. He jumped in surprise but quickly relaxed when she looked up at him with those big, blue eyes. She leaned in.

“I’ll come to you after Sophia’s asleep,” she whispered. She could practically hear him swallow hard, and she felt his hand get all sweaty against hers. He shot her a look that went straight to her core, all smoldering and full of need, and she took a shaky breath.

“Mom?” Sophia called from behind. “Can I have the top bunk?”

“Are you sure? Your leg isn’t hurting?”

“No, it’s fine. Besides, I should try. What if I get chased by a walker, and all I can do is climb on top of something? I gotta practice.”

“Well, you certainly make a good point,” Carol chuckled. Daryl opened the door, and the faint smell of decay hit them all in the face.

“Don’t worry,” Daryl assured them. “Gets better as you get down the hall a way. It’s dusty, but it’s safe for the night.” A loud thump over head made them all jump, and Carol pulled Sophia a little closer.

“What the hell was that?” T-Dog asked, pulling his gun from his belt.

“Probably one of them upstairs. Don’t worry. Me and Rick checked. Ain’t no way it can get at us.”

“I don’t know if I can sleep with those things right over us,” Andrea admitted.

“We have to try. We’ll have more energy tomorrow,” Carol urged. “I don’t like the idea myself, but I also don’t like the idea of hunting those things down when we don’t have enough daylight left. It’s too dangerous.”

A loud bang made them all jump again, and they looked to see Rick shutting the back entrance. Carol sighed and gave Daryl’s hand a squeeze.

“Generator’s shot,” he muttered. “We’ll look at it tomorrow.” He ran his hand over his face and suppressed a yawn.

“Let’s get to bed,” Lori urged.

“We should eat first,” Hershel encouraged. “Going to sleep on an empty stomach’s not going to do any of us any good. We’ll be restless all night.”

“Found some food in the back kitchen,” Daryl explained. “We’ll check the other dorms tomorrow and the school. Got some canned corn and beef stew. Enough for tonight and to take with us. Ain’t out of date yet, so we might as well enjoy it while we can.”

“Why don’t we find our rooms and meet in the kitchen?” Rick urged. “Kitchen’s down this hall.” He motioned toward the left and then to the right. “Down there’s about two dozen rooms to pick from. I suggest sticking close together in case anything happens in the night. Keep your doors closed. Stay away from the stair wells and just stick to the rooms and the bathrooms. The place is secure for now, and we wanna keep it that way.”

Everybody ambled down the right corridor that led to the rooms. Rick chose the one closest to the front, to no-one’s surprise. He wanted to be ready for anything, and being right at the front of the hall gave him the good fortune of being able to hear anything trying to get in. He and Lori took that room. Across from their room, Hershel claimed a room for himself.

“Do I get my own room?” Carl asked.

“If you promise you won’t wander off or go exploring,” Lori insisted sternly. Carl suppressed an eyeroll, because he knew his mother hated them so.

“I promise I won’t,” he nodded.

“Alright. You bunk next to me and Dad then, ok?” She nodded to the door right next door. Carl’s face lit up, and he hurried off to claim his room.

“I don’t want my own room,” Sophia whispered. She glanced toward the ceiling, and Carol pulled her arm around her daughter’s shoulders.

“Don’t worry. You can still bunk with me.”

“I’ll take this one,” Andrea yawned, nudging a door open with her foot next to Hershel’s room. She glanced around and deemed the room good enough for the night.

The others spread out, looking for a room to bunk in, and Carol and Sophia took the room next to T-Dog’s. Carol watched as Daryl chose a room a few doors down from everyone else. She knew exactly why he chose it, and she couldn’t stop the blush that rose in her cheeks.

*~*~*~*~*~*

The halls were dark by the time the group finished eating. They tossed the dirty dishes into the sink and left them. When morning came and allowed for a closer inspection of the grounds, they’d all be able to see if the place was truly safe enough to put down roots for a while.

Carol was one of the last to finish cleaning up in the bathrooms. When she found her way back to her room, Sophia was up on the top bunk with a flashlight in one hand and a book in the other. However, her flashlight-holding hand had fallen to the wayside, and the object was mere seconds away from falling to the floor with a crash. The girl had fallen asleep in the less than ten minutes Carol had been gone.

Carol smiled to herself and reached up to take the flashlight and book. She turned the flashlight off and tucked it and the book into Sophia’s pack. She pulled a blanket over her girl, and Sophia stirred lightly before rolling onto her side and sighing that heavy, final sigh before sleep took her under.

It was a cool night, and Carol rubbed her hands over her arms before she slipped out of the room and closed the door. She padded down the corridor in her socks, and she could see the faint glow from a lantern from under Daryl’s door. She felt a rush of heat spread through her veins like wildfire. She always got that rush of excitement and fluttering of butterflies when she went to him. They’d known each other for such a small amount of time in the scheme of things, but she knew him better than anybody she’d ever known. She knew his touch, his kiss, his laugh. She knew there was darkness and pain in his past, some of which he’d likely never speak on. It was ok with her, because she had her own darkness and pain that left her stomach churning and a hot, sick feeling in the back of her throat to even think on. Still, she was certain that he knew _her_ better than anybody else had.

She turned the knob on the door and slipped inside. She found him laying back in the bed with his arms folded behind his head. He had his eyes closed but a little smirk on his lips. He was bare-chested, and she knew he had to be naked under those covers. She bit her lip and pushed the door shut behind her. She thought for a moment, and when she spotted a wooden chair at a desk in the corner, she grabbed it and propped it up under the knob. Daryl cracked one eye open in time to see her slip out of her T-shirt and shimmy out of her sleep pants.

She crossed the room, naked, her skin pale in the bright glow from the battery-powered lantern.

“Didn’t want any interruptions,” she whispered. Daryl tossed the covers back, revealing he was already semi-hard, and Carol’s core throbbed.

“Climb in. S’getting cold.” Carol slipped under the covers with him, and he brought the covers over her waist. Her breasts swayed and brushed against his chest when she climbed on top of him. Daryl groaned and shifted his hips. “Been missin’ this.”

“Me too,” she whispered, reaching for the lantern light.

“What’re you doin’?” he asked. “Leave it on. Like seein’ your face.” He gently rubbed his hand up and down her back, and she smiled.

“We should save the batteries,” she whispered. He chuckled at her practicality. Daryl snorted.

“Fuck the batteries. Wanna see you when you come for me.” Carol blushed, even then with his stiff cock slipping against her slickness.

“Shh,” she whispered, leaning down and pressing her lips against his. “Close your eyes.” She reached over and flicked off the lantern, leaving them bathed in darkness. A disappointed groan escaped his mouth, and she giggled, sliding her hand down his chest and stomach, reaching between them to stroke him from base to tip.

“Fuck,” he groaned out.

“Eyes closed?” she teased.

“Mmmhmm,” he murmured, digging his fingers into her hips.

“Good,” she murmured. She pushed up on her knees, guiding him with her hand before she sunk down slowly onto his cock.

“Oh fuck,” he groaned. “Feel so damn good.” Carol bit back a whimper as she took him in as far as she could. That sweet, aching stretch as she adjusted to his size never got old. He reached up, hands grazing blindly over her breasts. She leaned into his touch, a soft moan escaping as she buried her hands into the pillow under his head to give herself leverage.

She leaned over him, rocking as he thrust upward to meet her movements. The darkness did make it difficult. She loved looking into his eyes when she rode him, and now she wasn’t even sure where she was looking or what she was looking at. But when she felt his mouth enclose over a nipple, she bit her lip and threw her head back.

“Touch me,” she panted. “Daryl…” His hand moved down his own stomach and toward the base of his cock until his thumb brushed against her folds. She slowed down until his fingers began circling her sensitive flesh in rhythm with their bodies, and when his thumb flicked over her clit, her core throbbed around him, squeezing him in the most delicious way.

“Fuck, Carol,” he bit out. “Ain’t gonna last.” She grinned into the darkness. She knew what he wanted then, and without words, she slipped out of him, and she let him take the lead. He rolled her onto her back and climbed over her, kissing a trail up from her hip bone, between her breasts, up her neck and behind her ear before finding her lips and slipping his tongue against hers. She sighed when he threw her leg over his and pushed into her, hard and fast.

She let out a gasp when he set a fast rhythm, gripping her hips and digging his knees into the mattress as he pounded into her. She was gripping his arms, crying out as her pussy fluttered and squeezed around him. When his hand came between them again and teased her clit with his calloused fingers, she felt her thighs squeeze around him, and he felt her body shudder with release a half second before his name spilled from her lips.

He was close, and he buried his face against her neck, inhaling her scent, feeling her pulse racing against his lips as he kissed the hollow of her throat. Her hands were in his hair then, and she was panting, whimpering over the sound of skin sliding and slapping against skin. Her arms curled around his neck, and it wasn’t but a few moments more that he let go, spilling into her as she trembled through another orgasm.

He rested his forehead against her chest, and she chuckled softly when her breath slowly returned to normal. Her fingers threaded through his damp hair, and his hands wandered down her waist and hips. He pulled out of her then, rolling onto his side and pressing soft kisses to her shoulder. She let out a soft hum when he found her mouth again, kissing her like it was the first and last time, all soft and sweet and tender.

“Jesus Christ,” Daryl panted, flopping onto his back, his cock still semi-hard and flagging against his belly. Carol chuckled and stared into the darkness and reached for his hand.

“Not bad for not being able to see a damn thing.”

“Still like it better with the light on,” he murmured. “Don’t like not seein’ you.”

“It’s kinda fun. Feels like we’re sneaking around. Feels naughty.”

“Naughty,” he snorted. “After all the shit we’ve done?”

“Are you saying it was boring?” she teased.

“Nah. It’s always good with you. Just can’t do much in a tiny little bunk bed.”

“Oh, no?” Carol asked, rolling to her side. “Is that a challenge?” He was quiet for a moment, and when he climbed over her and spread her legs apart, she had to bite her lip to keep from squealing. To her delight, Daryl was indeed up for the challenge.

_Author’s Note: Thanks again for reading, guys! So happy those of you who are still reading are enjoying it! Please let me know your thoughts on this chapter! As always, feedback is greatly appreciated!_


	24. Chapter 24

Twenty-Four

After a surprise pancake breakfast that T-Dog whipped up from instant pancake mix in the cafeteria, the group split into smaller groups to start scavenging and taking out walkers a building at a time, a floor at a time.

Shane, Andrea, Hershel split into one group. Rick, Maggie, Glenn and T-Dog split into another. Lori was feeling sick and offered to sit the mission out to keep Sophia company in checking out the already cleared out first floor for supplies since they had daylight to guide them. Sophia had wanted to go, but Carol insisted she stay behind. While most of the reasoning had been because Sophia wasn’t trained with a weapon, it was also because the girl’s leg still wasn’t wholly healed, and the nerve damage was still slowing her down, making her easy prey for a missed walker in a dark doorway.

While Carl had a little more weapons experience than Sophia, Rick asked the boy to sit the scavenge out as well to help his mother and Sophia. While he’d complained at first, there was no arguing with Rick, and Carol could see the relief in Lori’s face that he’d put his foot down with the boy.

Carol and Daryl decided to venture off on their own, because while Daryl usually felt he worked better alone, he felt better knowing that Carol was close. He knew she was still learning how to deal with walkers, but he felt better knowing she was learning under his watchful eye. While he knew no one in the group would purposefully let anything happen to Carol, he didn’t feel comfortable letting anybody teach her but himself. Losing her was not an option.

So, after everybody was in a relatively good mood after a tasty breakfast courtesy of T-Dog, Shane’s group headed up to explore the other floors of the building. Rick’s group decided to explore the school while Carol and Daryl decided to take on building 2.

The first floor was relatively untouched. The rooms were tidy but dusty, and the kitchen was stocked with enough canned food to get them through the worst of the winter months. There was also a supply closet filled to the brim with everything from first aid kits to feminine hygiene products. The rooms were all habitable, and the doors were all secure, and while there was no obvious signs of walkers on the above floor, Daryl told Carol to be ready for anything.

“What do you think?” Carol asked, as she and Daryl ventured into the stairwell after clearing the first floor.

“’Bout what?” he asked, shining his flashlight around the back of the first flight of stairs to make sure nothing was there to catch them by surprise. Dusky light filtered in from narrow windows that resembled something a prisoner might look through out of his jail cell. The windows hadn’t been cleaned in some time, and a thick film of dust and grime made light hard to come by in the narrow stairwell.

“About this place. Walls. Buildings. There’s plenty of room to spread out, to take in more people.”

“More people?” Daryl asked, as if the concept of what the world would be now that it was over had never occurred to him.

“Yeah. If we’re going to re-build society, we need more people.” They took the steps side-by-side. Carol clutched a knife in her hand and kept her other hand close to her belt in case she needed to grab her gun quickly.

“Who says that’s what we’re doing?” Daryl asked, glancing at her as they reached the first landing. Carol paused and eyed him.

“Then what? We just travel around Georgia until we die of a walker bite, or starvation or old age? What’s the point to all that?”

“We’re still breathin’.”

“Yeah. We’re still breathing. We’re still up and walking, but the dead are, too, in their own way. Not breathing, of course.” She fell quiet for a moment, and they scaled the steps to the exit onto the next floor. “There has not be something more. Some way to get back something of what we used to have. A way to sleep soundly and go to bed with a full belly. Hope for the future. For Sophia’s future. The last thing I want is for her to be all alone in the world.” Daryl nodded then, chewing on his words before he said them.

“Bet a big, fancy school like this has a football field out back. A greenhouse too, maybe. Be perfect for growin’ food. Hershel could help with that, bein’ a farmer and all. Who knows, maybe some farms ‘round here still have livestock roaming the pastures. If the dead ain’t got to them yet, that is.”

“We could use the school for lots of things. The gym could be used for weapons practice. Not shooting, of course. We’d do that someplace else so we wouldn’t attract so many walkers. We could set up big barrels or drums to collect rain water for boiling.”

“That what you were thinkin’ about, tossin’ and turnin’ last night? That why you got up and went back down the hall?”

“That, and it’s really hard to sleep in a twin-size bunk bed with a man putting off body heat like a furnace.” Daryl snorted at that.

“You’re gonna thank me for that when it gets real cold this winter. Just like I’m gonna thank you for the ear plugs you found down on the first floor this mornin’.”

“What?” Carol scoffed. “Are you implying that I snore?” Daryl smirked and tapped the butt of his crossbow against the narrow glass window on the door. “I do _not_ snore.”

“You snored one night at the farm,” he pointed out. “We fell asleep in my tent, and ya snored real loud.”

“Okay, what? That was…that was, what, once? I had an allergy thing going on. I mean, hello, we were screwing around in a field. It was a farm with hay and animals and weeds and…I _don’t_ snore.” Daryl’s grin widened the longer Carol talked, and she scrunched up her nose and swatted him on the behind.

“Bet I can take them bunkbeds apart, figure out how to make one big bed out of it. If we stay, you can move in with me. I’ll keep ya warm in the winter, and so long as I got earplugs, I won’t hear ya snore so much.”

“I _don’t_ snore,” Carol huffed, getting a laugh out of Daryl. “But if that’s your way of asking me to move in with you, I accept.” Daryl blushed and banged the butt of his crossbow against the door again. “Besides, everybody knows we’re together. We shouldn’t have to sneak around anymore. As fun as that can be, I’d rather just everybody know that we’re…you know.” Her cheeks flushed red. Daryl found it endearing that she could fuck him like it was their last night on earth and whisper some of the dirtiest things in his ear, but when they were actually talking about it, she’d blush. Of course, he was no better, and he knew it, too.

“We’re…adults,” Daryl finished for her.

“Exactly,” she grinned. Daryl peered through the window briefly, seeing no sign of walkers roaming the halls. He took a moment to pull Carol close and brush his lips against hers. She moaned softly when he backed her up against the wall and ran his hand down her waist and her hip. He peppered warm, wet kisses along her jaw and down her neck, and he wrapped his hand around the back of her knee, pulling her leg around his waist. She gasped softly when he pressed into her, and she nipped at his ear. “You’re playing with fire…”

“Don’t mind to get burnt,” he teased, reaching for his belt buckle.

“I’ll kiss it and make it better,” she huffed out, blushing at her own words and how silly they sounded coming out of her mouth. Daryl snorted out a laugh, kissing her hungrily again. Carol giggled, and she tugged his lower lip between her teeth and wrapped her arms around him. But before Daryl could move to loosen his belt, a raspy growl and a loud bang on the door ruined the moment.

“Fuck,” Daryl bit out, pulling back and straightening out his shirt that Carol had managed to bunch up past his belly button. “We best get this done.”

“Yeah, we’re pretty shitty scavengers today,” Carol admitted. “Maybe we should split up before we end up burning the building down or something.” Daryl smirked, and Carol bit her bottom lip before leaning in to press one more kiss to his lips. “Can I take this one?” She grabbed her knife again, holding it at the ready. Daryl eyed her nervously for a moment and glanced over at the walker gnashing at the glass pane, breaking two teeth off in the process.

“You sure you’re ready?”

“I have to be. Learn by doing, right?” Daryl nodded. Carol took a shaking breath and cleared her throat. She stood up straight and nodded, while Daryl grabbed hold of the door handle. “Alright. Let’s go.”

_Author’s Note: Thanks so much for the feedback! Hope you enjoyed this chapter. Let me know what you think!_


	25. Chapter 25

Twenty-Five

_Author’s Note: This chapter mentions pregnancy loss in somewhat graphic detail. Also mentions of spousal abuse._

There were a total of four walkers in the building Carol and Daryl had checked out. The other groups found another dozen between them. After every last one was put down, tossed down the stairwells and dragged out into a pile outside, every last crawlspace and room was checked until they were satisfied the danger was gone.

It was a group effort that took hours. The corpses were lit on fire, and as they burned, Shane, Rick, Daryl and T-Dog worked to dig a hole big enough to bury the remains. The air smelled of burnt, rotten flesh, and the scent got in their clothes and on their skin. It was impossible to shake. So when everyone started back to the main dorm for the night, agreeing to put off grabbing supplies until morning, the first place everyone made a beeline for was the shower rooms.

When Carol left the shower room with her hair drip drying on her clean shirt, she headed for her and Sophia’s room. At first, she was alarmed to find the door open, but when she stepped closer, she was happy to find Sophia and Carl doing what looked like math homework. Carol looked around for Lori but didn’t see her.

Carl was the first to look up, and he put his pencil and book aside.

“Did you see any walkers?”

“A few,” Carol nodded, crossing her arms across her chest. She saw the worried look crease Sophia’s brows, and she shook her head. “Don’t worry. We took care of them.”

“You did?” Sophia asked.

“Well, the group did,” Carol insisted.

“Did you?” Sophia asked. “Did you put one down?”

“A couple,” Carol said with a little nod.

“Was it scary?” Sophia asked, wide-eyed.

“It was scary. That’s why I don’t want _either_ of you going near those things until you’re properly trained. Even after, I want you to keep your distance. You hear me?” Sophia nodded. Carol looked around again. “Carl, where’s your mom?”

“She wasn’t feeling good. She told us to do some math work for a while. She was gonna go lay down.” Carol nodded.

“Ok. You two stay here. I’m gonna go check on her, ok?”

“Where’s my dad?”

“Probably in the showers. We all worked hard today. Don’t worry. He’s fine. Tired, but fine.” Carol offered him a tired smile. “Sophia? You ok?”

“I’m fine. Carl’s helping me with fractions.” Carol narrowed her eyes at her daughter. Fractions were difficult for a lot of people, but not Sophia. When she saw the blush of pink on Sophia’s cheeks, she realized what was going on.

“Oh, okay,” Carol said slowly.

“I got mostly B’s on my fractions,” Carl said with a proud nod. Carol looked to Sophia who just ducked her head a little. The girl always brought home A’s in math, but she wasn’t about to spoil her fun.

“Well, if you have any questions, I know Hershel is pretty good with math.”

“We’ve got answers in the back of the book. We can check our work,” Sophia insisted.

“Oh. Well, you two have fun,” Carol grinned. She stepped out of the room, passing by Shane as she headed to Rick and Lori’s room. He acknowledged her with a lingering stare that struck her as odd before she stopped in front of the door and knocked. “Lori?”

“Is it just you?” Lori’s voice sounded strained, which was definitely cause for alarm.

“It’s just me.”

“Come in.” Carol pushed the door open and found Lori half-sitting, half-lying on the bottom bunk. She was sweat-covered and pale. Carol quickly shut the door and moved across the room. She felt Lori’s forehead. No sign of fever, but the woman winced in pain and brought her hand down low on her stomach. Carol flinched, remembering her own history with pregnancy.

“I think I’m losing the baby,” Lori bit out. “Something’s wrong.” Carol sat down next to Lori, and Lori whimpered when another pain hit her.

“I need to get Hershel.”

“No. No, there’s nothing he can do,” Lori choked out. “There’s nothing anybody can do.” Carol knew she was right. If Lori was in fact having a miscarriage, there were no facilities to take her to, no medicines readily available to try to stop it.

“Let me get Rick.”

“No. No, please,” Lori choked out. “Just wait.” She took a few shaking breaths, and she sat up a little and blinked back tears. “I haven’t even told Shane yet. I think he suspects, but he’s pretty much kept his distance.” She grabbed the steel of the bottom of the top bunk and leaned forward a little. “Ok. Maybe…maybe you should go get Hershel? I want to talk to him before I talk to Rick. Every time I mention the baby, Rick gets this look in his eyes. I know he wants to forgive me, but he can’t yet.” She let out a groan, and Carol reached out to put her hand on her friend’s shoulder.

“Just lay back. I’ll get him. Ok? I’ll be right back.” Carol helped Lori ease back onto the mattress, but before she could turn to go, the door opened wide, and Rick walked in. He stopped in the doorframe the moment he saw Lori’s face scrunched up in pain. He dropped his pack on the desk, and took a couple steps toward.

“What’s…what’s happening?” Carol felt Lori grip her arm, and she looked over her shoulder.

“Go get Hershel.”

“Is she…”

“Just go get Hershel. Now,” Carol offered in an even tone. “And shut the door.” Rick swallowed hard, and his expression was one between worry and uncertainty, but he did turn and close the door like Carol had asked him.

“God,” Lori choked out, covering her face with her hands. “I messed everything up.”

“I don’t know,” Carol said with a sad smile. “The world messed up on its own. Everybody else is just surviving the best they know how.”

“Carol? Have you ever…did you ever lose a baby?” Carol looked down for a moment before taking Lori’s hand. She offered her a little nod and her lower lip trembled.

“I have. I also had a scare with Sophia. I thought for sure I was losing her, but they were just cramps. My body adjusting to the growing baby.”

“Do you think that’s what this is?”

“It could be,” Carol offered quietly. “I don’t want to say it’s not. Have you been bleeding?”

“Spotting. Just here and there for a day now.” Carol nodded. “That can happen.”

“It never did with Carl. Aside from morning sickness and swollen ankles, everything was pretty easy with Carl up until the end when I had to have a C-Section.”

“Every pregnancy is different,” Carol said quietly. “I was lucky to have Sophia. I got pregnant pretty easily. Sophia was my first, and I was terrified, but she came out healthy. I had a miscarriage not long after she was born. I had another miscarriage a while after that. Ed had gotten mad at me and just didn’t hold back. I got pregnant again, and I made it to four months with that one. Ed pushed me down the stairs, and I…”

“Oh God,” Lori choked out. Carol flinched when Lori put her hand on her arm.

“I’m sorry,” Carol murmured. “Here you are scared and hurting, and I’m going on about my own problems.”

“I asked,” Lori whispered. “I’m so sorry.” Lori put her hand on her own belly. “The pain’s stopping. That’s good, right?”

“I think that’s good,” Carol said quietly, turning at the sound of shuffling outside the door. A knock came, and a moment later, the door opened to reveal Hershel and Rick. Carol started to move, but Lori held onto her hand a little tighter. “Stay. Will you please stay?” Carol looked to Rick who looked positively lost, and then she looked to Lori. She recognized that fear in her friend’s eyes, and it was clear Rick could not be a comfort now.

“I’ll stay,” Carol promised. “Just try not to worry.”

*~*~*~*~*

She turned in the bed for the third time in five minutes. Daryl could practically hear her thinking as she lay snuggled up beside him. She hadn’t complained about being too warm once, and in fact, she’d tucked herself just a little closer each time she turned.

Daryl shrugged one arm up and pulled it around her shoulders, caressing the bare skin there as she let out a sleepy sigh.

“You ok?” he asked into the darkness.

“Mmm, I’m ok,” she murmured.

“You’re awful quiet. This have somethin’ to do with Lori?”

“I don’t know,” she whispered. “Maybe.” Daryl groaned softly and reached to flick the lantern on. They both squinted into the darkness, and he turned onto his side to look at her. “I feel bad for her. Everybody knows about the baby, now. And Shane’s looking at her like he was back at the farm. Possessive, almost.” Word of Lori’s condition had spread fast despite the hush-hush nature of Rick’s trip to get Hershel. Besides, everyone was bound to find out sooner or later. “I can’t help but feel like he’s a ticking time bomb.”

“Rick’s gonna have to get a handle on him.” Carol scooted closer, and Daryl slid his harm comfortingly up and down her back. “Hershel says she’s gonna be ok? The baby, too?”

“Yeah, but he wants her resting for a few weeks. I guess we have no choice but to stay put.”

“Ain’t so bad here,” he said quietly. “In a couple days we can go out, see what’s close. Might hit the jackpot on supplies someplace.” Carol offered him a tense smile in return, and his hand paused on her back. “You gonna tell me?”

“Tell what?”

“What you been thinkin’ about since we turned the light out.” Carol sighed and shook her head, and Daryl brought his hand up to her face. He brushed his thumb along her jaw, and she finally dragged her gaze up to look him in the eye.

“Today just brought back a lot of memories for me.”

“You wanna tell me about it?”

“It was a long time ago,” she said quietly. She blinked back tears, and he pressed a kiss to her forehead.

“Don’t matter. Old pain hurts just as much as new. Sometimes worse.” Carol took a deep breath and nodded. Looking into his eyes, she felt a sense of calm wash over her. He was her safe place. He was her light in dark times.

“I was just thinking about the babies I lost after Sophia.” She swallowed thickly, the ache of tears threatening to fall making her throat tighten with each breath. “The last one? I told you I fell down the stairs.” She sighed and shook her head. “It’s what I told the doctors. Ed pushed me.” Daryl leaned in and pressed a kiss to her shoulder.

“Kinda thought it might be somethin’ like that.” He pulled back and brushed a tear from her cheek with the pad of his thumb.

“I wasn’t just four months pregnant. I was almost nineteen weeks.” She sniffled. “I know the fall knocked me out for something like five minutes. I remember it hurt to move, and I thought I’d broken my back. Sophia was crying. Her little bookbag was still strapped to her back. Front door was wide open from when she came in from the bus. She was just shaking me all over saying ‘mama, wake up.’ She just kept crying. Ed was gone. I don’t know where he went, but it made the lie easier when I told the paramedics I fell down the stairs.” She closed her eyes for a moment, and when she opened them again, she looked into his eyes to see that safe place again, that warmth that soothed her in a way nothing else could.

“M'sorry that happened to you.”

“I didn’t know what was happening. Not at first. But I got up, because Sophia was talking to someone on the phone. She’d learned at school about calling 911. I don’t know why I got up, but the second I did, I felt something between my legs. I thought I’d wet myself or something. I was disoriented. But I felt pain. I thought I was bleeding. Turns out, my water broke. I got to Sophia and I sort of passed out on the couch until the paramedics came. The last thing I remember was being loaded onto the ambulance and Sophia crying for me while one of the paramedics held her hand. When I woke up, I was in the hospital, and I felt, I don’t know, hollow. I touched my stomach, and something wasn’t right. It felt bulky but not pregnant. The doctor reminded me about the accident. He said I was in and out of it when they brought me in, but I lost the baby. I don’t even remember it, but they said I was delivering before I got out of the ambulance.”

“It’s ok,” he murmured, stroking her back as she sucked in a shuddering breath again. “I’m here.”

“I guess I kept bleeding, and they had to go in to stop it. The had to cut me open, but they got it stopped.” Her hand traced over the faded surgical scar on her lower belly. She knew he’d seen it many times, but he’d never pressed her on it. “I kept asking for my baby, and they had to keep telling me it was gone. They asked me if I wanted to see him.” She blinked her tears away again. “Him. It was a boy.”

“God,” he murmured. His tongue was thick in his mouth, unable to say much else.

“I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t look at him. The next thing I know, Ed’s rushing in like he had no idea what was going on. He was holding Sophia’s hand, and he was playing the doting husband and father.” She scoffed. “I hated him. I hated him so much, but I hated myself more. I blamed myself for letting it happen.”

“You didn’t.”

“I know,” Carol said quietly. “Now.” She sniffled. “The whole thing made Ed resent me all the more. He never said it, but I think he blamed me for the fact that he killed his own son.” She shook her head. “You know, I don’t even think Sophia remembers that. If she does, she doesn’t talk about it. She was just seven. I never really talked about the baby with her, because I’d had two previous miscarriages. I just didn’t want to get her hopes up, you know?” Daryl nodded, and he rubbed soothing circles over Carol’s back with his calloused hands. A surge of emotion hit her like a tidal wave, and she trembled in his arms. She bit back a sob and buried her face against his neck, sobbing softly. “Sorry. I’m sorry.”

“Hey, you don’t gotta apologize. It’s ok. M’here.” He pressed a kiss to the top of her head, and he held her as she cried. He fell quiet and listened to the sounds of her breath catching with each sob until her breathing began to slow and her sniffles quieted. When she pulled back, he brushed the tears from her face with his fingertips.

“I haven’t talked about that in a long time.” She shook her head. “He doesn’t even have a grave. We had him cremated. I spread his ashes over my parents’ graves. And then it was like he never existed. Ed never talked about him. Sophia asked me, once, why my belly wasn’t big anymore, and I didn’t know how to answer her. I never really did. I think she saw how sad it made me and didn’t bring it up again. Eventually, I think she just forgot.”

“Yeah. There’s a lot of shit I blocked out when I was a kid. Sometimes it comes back to me in the middle of the night, ya know? Like a nightmare, only you realize it ain’t a dream. It’s a memory.”

“Yeah. I get that a lot, too.” She wiped at her eyes and leaned in to kiss him.

“Thank you for listening.”

“You don’t gotta thank me for that. It’s what we do, right?”

“Right,” she whispered. “I love you so much.”

“I love you, too.” He hugged her close.

“M’sorry for what that son of a bitch did to ya. M’sorry that ‘cause of him you never got to have another Sophia.”

“It was better that way. Losing my son broke my heart, but if I’d gotten pregnant again, I would have…” She cleared her throat. “I wouldn’t have wanted to bring another baby into that life. It wasn’t right. I protected Sophia the best I could, but it got harder the older she got.” Daryl nodded a little. “Still, I thought about it, a lot, you know? I couldn’t help it. I thought about how good of a big sister Sophia would have been. I wondered what my son would’ve looked like.” She curled into him again, resting her head on his chest. “Did you ever want kids?”

He let out a slow breath, and a soft groan rumbled in his chest.

“No. Didn’t wanna have a chance to make the same mistakes my folks made. My daddy wasn’t no better than your husband.” Carol placed a kiss to his shoulder and rested her chin on his chest to look at him.

“You could never be like that.”

“Didn’t wanna take the chance that the bad in them might pass down to my kid.”

“It wouldn’t have. You’d have been a good dad.” She chewed her bottom lip for a moment and looked up at him. Her eyes glassed over again, and he knew what she was thinking. He leaned in to kiss her again.

“We got a lot of work to do to make a world worth livin’ in. Maybe we’ll get that someday. If we do? I still got everything I need already. Don’t need nothin’ else. Alright?” Carol smiled through her tears and nodded her head.

“Alright,” she whispered.

“We best get some sleep. You ok?”

“Yeah. I feel better. Thank you.” She snuggled up against him, giving him one last kiss for the night.

“Love you,” he murmured against her lips. Her heart fluttered in her chest. She knew he meant what he said. Whatever happened, she had Sophia and Daryl. That was all she needed, and that was what she was going to hold on to.

“I love you, too.”

_Author’s Note: It was brought to my attention about a continuity error. I thought I had fixed it, but poor internet connection and sleep deprivation clearly got in the way. Back in Chapter 17, I originally intended for Shane to find out about Lori's pregnancy. I thought I had fixed my error, but I had not. My intention after editing was to make it clear that Shane and Rick had a confrontation about the affair but not know about the baby. The original draft had him finding out about the baby. I have gone back to edit Chapter 17 properly to hopefully make things make a little more sense. I apologize for the confusion!_


	26. Chapter 26

Twenty-Six

“What the hell?” Daryl grumbled, sitting up straight in bed after a gunshot rang out in the middle of the night. Carol was up and pulling her clothes on before Daryl could even decide if he was dreaming or awake.

“I heard fighting. Come on,” Carol urged. She reached over and flipped the switch on the lantern. Daryl squinted into the light.

“Are you fuckin’ kidding me? How long are they gonna do this shit?” He rolled over, nearly wedging himself between the frames of the two bunks they’d pushed together. He rolled again and sat up to swing his legs over the bed. Carol tossed his jeans and shirt at him.

Another gunshot.

“What the _fuck_?” Andrea’s voice carried down the hall, and Carol looked at Daryl before sighting with exasperation.

In the month since they’d arrived at the boarding school, they’d been working every day to clean the place up and make each building functional. They were still all sleeping on the same floor of the first dormitory while they adjusted to the new settlement, but that was beginning to cause tension between certain members of the group. Namely, Rick and Shane.

Since Lori’s pregnancy became the hot topic of the month, it had been argument after argument between Rick and Lori, Lori and Shane and Shane and Rick. Once Shane knew about the pregnancy, there was no hiding the relationship he’d had with Lori from the rest of the group. It was clear that he believed the child was his and had made his claim on the baby Lori carried. This, of course, didn’t sit well with either Rick or Lori, who preferred to raise the baby together.

Carl was staying out of the way for the most part, barely speaking to either of his parents and instead taking comfort in his friendship with Sophia. They spent a lot of their time exploring the grounds and doing school work to keep their minds sharp. Occasionally, they’d grab Daryl for an impromptu shooting lesson, and while Carol was nervous about her daughter handling a weapon, she did want her to be prepared for anything. So, occasionally, they’d leave the grounds, just her, Daryl, Sophia and Carl and get some training in. Lori had no objections, and while Shane offered to teach Carl, Lori preferred if he kept his distance from her son.

Carol and Daryl preferred getting away at any opportunity to avoid the tension that seemed to come to an explosive head nearly every night. It was getting old, fast.

They finished dressing fast and headed out into the hall. Sophia was standing there in her own doorway with wide eyes, staring off toward where the rest of the group was running.

“You ok?” Daryl asked, looking at the girl as they passed by the room.

“Yeah. What’s going on?”

“I don’t know,” Carol offered. “Stay here, sweetie. We’ll be back.” She brushed her hand over her daughter’s shoulder and hurried off down the hall. Carl poked his head out of his room, and Carol pointed back toward Sophia. “Carl, stay here with Sophia.”

“I wanna know what’s going on.”

“Stay here,” Carol repeated.

“I can help. I can shoot!” Carl insisted.

“Damn it, kid. Stay put!” Daryl barked. “Don’t get in the way.” Carol looked to Daryl who already looked like he felt bad enough for yelling at the boy, but his words worked, because Carl turned around with an eyeroll and walked back toward Sophia.

Carol’s curious glance at Daryl caught his eye, and he sighed.

“Sorry. Just tired of gettin’ woke up ever damn night. ‘Bout to just move to the top floor where I don’t gotta listen to this bullshit.” He huffed as they turned the corner to the lobby. “Better yet, make their asses move up there.”

The night was cold and dark, and when she stepped outside, Carol half expected to see Rick and Shane at each other’s throats for the twelfth time that week. Instead, she found them standing next to each other at the front gates. The faint growl of a walker chilled Carol more than the cool air did, and when it pressed up against the gate, Shane took a step forward and put a bullet through it’s head. Rick shoved him again.

“You’re drawing more of those things this way. What’re you thinking?” he snapped. Shane stumbled backward, a chuckle falling from his lips. Liquid sloshed in the glass bottle he was holding. Carol recognized it as a bottle of whiskey T-Dog had found hidden in the cupboard of one of the kitchens.

“Was thinkin’ there was three damn geeks outside our gates. Now there’s no damn geeks.”

“You used your gun?” Daryl asked squinting into the dark.

“Gun’s the only sure way. Knife takes too long. Too messy. Could get yourself bit if you ain’t careful.”

“Jesus Christ,” Daryl muttered, kicking at the ground. “You gotta stop this shit.” He swiped for Shane’s whiskey bottle, and Shane shoved at him.

“Mind your own business, you redneck asshole,” Shane slurred. Daryl grabbed for the bottle again, and Shane took a swing, knocking him right in the jaw. Daryl stumbled backward, and he huffed out a breath. He was sick and tired of getting popped in the face because of those assholes, and the more Shane stared at him, the more pissed off he got. He lunged for Shane again, knocking him back against the gates and grabbing him by the shirt collar.

“I don’t give a fuck what your problem is, but how you handle it affects every person in this goddamn place.” Shane struggled, and Daryl let him go, taking a step back and looking to Rick. “Either you sort out your problems, or we’ll sort ‘em out for you. I don’t claim to be no leader, but anybody who puts my family in danger is gonna get their ass booted out the gates.” Carol’s gaze shot up to focus on Daryl in that instance. She wasn’t even sure he knew what he’d said, he’d said it so fast, but the determination and frustration in his face was unmistakable, even in the darkness. He’d meant every single word. “So get your fuckin’ shit together for the group’s sake. Jesus Christ, it’s like livin’ with a couple of frat boys. Drinkin’ and fightin’. Grow the fuck up.” Carol stared at Daryl when he turned to walk away. Her brows shot up, and she was pretty certain even Shane was shocked at Daryl’s outburst. But it had been a long time coming. Rick, Lori and Shane had a lot of drama to sort out, and while it was nobody’s business but theirs, it was quickly becoming _everybody’s_ business because of shit like this.

“Let’s all go back inside and try to get some sleep,” Hershel urged, stepping up as Daryl stalked off toward the dorms. “I think we need to have a discussion about this tomorrow.”

“There’s nothing to discuss,” Rick insisted. Shane scoffed and took another sip of his whiskey.

“Your ‘nothing’ is making everybody miserable around here, so I beg to differ,” Hershel stated evenly. “Shane? Can I make you some coffee?”

“Don’t need no coffee,” Shane snorted. “Leave me be. I got everything I need.” Shane pushed past Hershel and headed to the dorms, while Lori came rushing out pulling her arms around herself in the cold.

“What happened?” Her eyes were wild in the dim lantern light.

“Nothing. It’s over. Just some walkers,” Rick lied. “Let’s go back to bed.” Lori looked at Carol for a moment, and Carol reached out to touch her arm.

“You should get inside,” Carol urged. “I think we all need a good night’s sleep for once.” Lori looked back toward Shane’s retreating figure and then back at her husband.

“Rick…”

“It’s fine. We’ll talk in the morning,” he urged. “Come on. You need to rest. Let’s go back.” Carol watched them turn and walk off together, barely touching, both clearly miserable from the arguing and the confrontations. Carol shook her head and wrapped her arms around herself.

“She ok?” Hershel asked, stepping up beside her. Carol glanced at him.

“You’re the closest thing we have to a doctor. You tell me.”

“I don’t mean her health,” Hershel chuckled. “You’re her friend.”

“Yeah,” Carol nodded. “She’s made some mistakes. We’ve all made mistakes. Only now she’s got to live with them in impossible circumstances.” Carol shook her head. “She’s doing the best she can. I think Rick and Shane are making it hard on her. She doesn’t need that right now.”

“No, she doesn’t. I agree,” Hershel nodded. Carol groaned softly and rubbed at her temples as a headache began to pulse there. “Carol, are _you_ ok?”

“Me? Oh, I’m fine. Just a headache. Sleep’s been hard to come by lately,” Carol admitted.

“One night’s uninterrupted sleep,” Hershel murmured, a longing in his voice that she heard often when he thought about all the things they used to take for granted. “I slept so soundly on the farm.”

“So did I,” Carol admitted. “It was peaceful. I hope we can find that sort of peace again. I thought we could have it here, but I’m not so sure now.”

“Not so sound like a novelty greeting card, but home is where the heart is. And right now? Everybody’s too on edge and exhausted to know what they really want. But I know one thing for sure. Folks need to sort out their differences before they tear the whole group apart.” Carol sighed heavily but nodded in agreement, and when they stepped into the lobby, Daryl was waiting there for her. She offered him a tired smile, and Hershel headed off toward his room.

“Sorry I didn’t wait for ya,” he said quietly. “If I stuck around another minute, I was bound to say a few things I’d probably regret.”

“No. What you said? You were right. Every word.” She pulled her arms around Daryl, and he tugged her close, burying his face against her neck, reveling in the warmth there. She giggled when his cold nose pressed into her skin.

“Meant every word, too,” he said quietly, rubbing her back. Carol pulled back a little, biting her bottom lip. She knew what he was saying, and she felt the warmth bubble up in her chest as her eyes brimmed with tears. “You’re my family. You and Sophia. I’d do anything to keep you safe.” Carol smiled and touched his cheek.

“I know you would. And I’d do the same for you. You know that, right?” He nodded.

“Don’t know what the hell I did to deserve you, but I figure I musta done somethin’ right. Don’t know who I’d be now if it wasn’t for you.”

“You’d be you,” Carol promised. “You’ve always been you.” She placed her hand against his chest. “People like us either live with the scars, or we let the past consume us. We’re both still here. We’re still trying. I think we both found each other at the exact _right_ moment. Ed’s shadow was gone. Merle’s shadow. It’s just us and our scars. And I think we’re doing ok, don’t you?”

“Yeah,” Daryl murmured, pulling her into his arms again. He stroked her hair and inhaled the sweet smell of soap on her skin. “Yeah, I think we’re doin’ just fine.”

_Author’s Note: For those of you who are still reading, I thank you. Please let me know what you thought of the chapter. Feedback is very much appreciated and encouraged. Thanks._


	27. Chapter 27

Twenty-Seven

Daryl rubbed his hand over one fogged-up window in the back seat of Carol’s Jeep Cherokee. A noise had startled them both, but they hadn’t let it ruin the mood. But, a couple more bumps against the back of the vehicle later was a little more concerning. Daryl was buried inside of her with his ass on full display, propping himself up with one arm while wiping the fog away with his free hand. He grunted as Carol’s walls pulsed around him, and he muttered something under his breath before leaning back down to kiss her again. Carol let out a little chuckle against his lips and pushed at his shoulder. Something she could only describe as a gruff whine escaped his lips.

“What was it?” she panted.

“Walker,” he muttered, thrusting his hips against hers and accidentally kicking the door behind him. They’d changed positions when the window handle kept poking him in the ass. Her legs were up over his shoulders now, and they had been on the cusp of Carol’s third orgasm when the jolts and bangs against the vehicle had started.

Another loud bang and another set Daryl’s teeth on edge.

“No,” Carol groaned, huffing out a frustrated breath.

“God damn it,” he grunted. He never thought he’d see the day where he’d start to go soft so damn fast, but those fucking skin bags were ruining the mood real fast. Carol’s flushed face and kiss-swollen lips were the prettiest picture he ever did see, but by the time another bang shook the vehicle, the moment was over. “Son of a bitch.” Carol let out a laugh, and Daryl pulled out. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be,” she grinned, licking her lips. “Nothing to be sorry about.” She folded her arms behind her head.

“Yeah, says you. You got off,” he snorted, stuffing himself back into his pants.

“Twice,” she sighed, fanning herself. “You’re good.” Then her lower lip poked out, and she brought down her legs from over Daryl’s shoulder. “Sorry, Pookie. I’ll take care of you tonight. Promise.”

“Ya don’t have to.”

“I _want_ to,” she insisted, tugging her shirt back down her belly. She preferred feeling his bare skin against her own, but it was too damn cold to get naked, especially when they’d chanced it just to get a few minutes of loud, unbridled passion where they didn’t have to hold back for fear of little ears—or big, nosy ears, for that matter—hearing. Unfortunately, when they took those rare few minutes away from the group under the guise of a scavenging trip, even the most secluded of places would see a smattering of walkers swarming by the time they finished.

Daryl moved out of the way so Carol could tug her pants back on and up her hips, and in a matter of moments, they were sitting side-by-side, still panting and red-faced. Daryl looked a little worse for wear, but Carol intended to make good on her promise.

“How many do you think’s out there?” Carol asked, wiping a streak through the fog on the window. A walker gnashed its teeth at her, and she jumped.

“’Least four,” Daryl mumbled. “Fuck. Let’s get outta here before more of ‘em come along. Don’t wanna get caught in a herd.” Daryl climbed up into the driver’s seat, and Carol followed after, settling into the passenger’s seat and wiping the sweat from her forehead with the back of her hand. Daryl started the engine, turned the heat on to take down the fog on the windows and clipped a couple walkers as he pulled back out onto the road.

Carol slid across the bench seat and wrapped one arm around him, snuggling up against him and resting her head on his shoulder.

“You cold?” he asked.

“Hmm, not really,” she sighed. Daryl chuckled, and he pulled his arm around her shoulders, giving her arm a little rub. “You’re warm enough for both of us.”

“Don’t hear you complainin’ about me bein’ a furnace now,” he snorted.

“Shut up,” she grinned, tucking her bare hand into the front of his shirt. His skin felt damn near like the hood of a car left in the summer sun. Daryl moved his arm a little, and he ran his fingers through the hair at the nape of Carol’s neck. It curled there, and he loved playing with the ends and twirling them around his fingers.

“Hair’s gettin’ long,” he pointed out.

“Mmmhmm,” she hummed, pressing a kiss against the side of his neck. He shivered, and Carol snuggled up a little closer. “Longer, anyway. I’ve kept it short for so long, I don’t think it knows what it’s supposed to do, so it just does its own thing.” She thought for a moment. “You know, I don’t think Sophia remembers me with long hair. I started cutting it off when she was about two. I always told people it was because she liked to grab for things. Earrings. Long hair. But really, it was because I got tired of Ed yanking it whenever I pissed him off.” A soft grumble escaped Daryl’s throat, and he tightened his arm around her protectively. She rested her head back against Daryl’s shoulder, and he kissed the top of her head.

“I used to try to make myself look smaller,” Daryl admitted. Carol lifted her head again.

“What?”

“I was real small. Just barely in school. I had this notion in my head that if I looked smaller, maybe my daddy wouldn’t notice I was there. So, I started stealin’ Merle’s clothes. He was a lot bigger’n me, and I’d just stay real quiet, slinkin’ around the house wearin’ clothes four sizes too big for me.” He scoffed and shook his head. “Seems stupid now.”

“It’s not stupid. You were little, and the person who was supposed to love and protect you was a monster. You coped any way you could.” She pressed a kiss to his cheek. “You survived. I’m glad you survived.” She pulled her arm out from around him and took his hand. “I would tiptoe. I didn’t even realize I was doing it. I guess it started after Sophia was born. I would tiptoe so I wouldn’t wake her. But even after she was older, I found myself slinking around the house like a scared mouse or something. I didn’t want to make any noise that would remind Ed I was around. Usually he was passed out in front of the TV in his recliner or something, and I’d just leave him be until it was time to go to bed. I’d stay in my room or hang out in Sophia’s room and pretend I _really_ wanted to have that tea party with her. Anything I could do to keep out of his way.”

“You get nightmares?” Daryl asked quietly. Carol sighed softly and shrugged one shoulder.

“I did while I was married to him. Sometimes, I think back on it, and the nightmares weren’t nearly as bad as the reality. “Do you?”

“Sometimes,” Daryl admitted. “Not as much as I used to. Used to be two or three times a week. Now maybe once a month.” He squeezed Carol’s hand, and she smiled to herself. “It’s better when you’re sleepin’ beside me.” Carol felt tears prick at her eyes, and she blinked them away. She didn’t know what to say. She couldn’t quite put into words the way he made her feel. He made her feel safe and loved and valued. He made her feel like everything she knew about the world before was a lie. The only good thing to come from it had been Sophia. And with the world the horrible, scary place it was today, he was her anchor. He was the light in the dark. She knew as long as he was at her side, everything would work out the way it was supposed to.

“I love you,” she finally said, pressing a kiss to his cheek. He smiled and squeezed her hand a little tighter, and they continued on down the road in silence.

*~*~*~*~*~*

Not long after they’d arrived at the school, the electric gate out front had been fixed to open and shut on a pulley system and without electricity. Thanks to this fix, they could conserve fuel for the generator for more important purposes. Of course, this also meant that somebody needed to man the gate anytime someone was outside the walls. On this particular afternoon, it was T-Dog at the gates, and when Daryl drove through, T gave him _that_ look, the one with pursed lips, a knowing glance and a head shake. Carol caught it and blushed as Daryl slowly pulled the Cherokee through.

“Find anything?” T-Dog asked, tugging on the rope that brough the gates clanging back together. He tied off the rope and put the chain through the slats, locking the doors securely.

“Yeah, found some food, medical supplies, seed packets,” Daryl said confidently.

“There were a couple of stores that looked untouched, but there were too many walkers in the parking lot to chance it,” Carol spoke up, glancing up at T-Dog from the window. “Maybe we can take a group out in a few days once they’ve cleared out.” T-Dog glanced in the back of the Jeep Cherokee and saw the multiple boxes and bags full of things.

“You run into some trouble? You’ve been gone for hours.” T-Dog crossed his arms across his chest and grinned shamelessly at Daryl. Daryl snorted then and shook his head.

“You wanna help us unload this shit or not?”

“Yeah, I’ll be there,” T-Dog agreed with a little chuckle. He shook his head and waved Daryl on, and Carol rolled her eyes when Daryl flipped him off out the window.

“Be nice,” she laughed.

“You saw the way he was lookin’ at us. Lookin’ at us like he thought we were out there screwin’ around.”

“Well, we were,” Carol pointed out.

“Yeah, but he don’t have to be so goddamn rude about it.”

“He wasn’t,” Carol laughed. “Aw, Pookie. You’re blushing.” Daryl ducked his head, though he could feel his ears and cheeks burning.

“Stahp,” he muttered.

He pulled up out in front of the first dorm building, and Sophia and Carl came running outside in their warm coats.

“Mom! Did you guys find anything good?” Sophia asked.

“We found a few things,” Carol said with a nod, “but there are a couple stores we’ll check out later in the week. There were too many walkers.”

“Did you see any walkers up close?” Sophia asked.

“A few,” Carol admitted. “That’s why we’re a little late getting back.” She caught Daryl’s glance out of the corner of her eye and blushed. “Everything ok, here?”

“Yeah. Hershel and Maggie are talking about making a garden in the Spring,” Carl spoke up.

“Good thing we found some seeds then.” Daryl motioned toward the back of the car.

“Sweet! Can we help?” Carl asked.

“You gotta talk to Hershel about that. Think he’s the head of the gardening committee.”

“We have a gardening committee?” Carl asked with a furrowed brow.

“Just go tell the old man we’re back, kid,” Daryl chuckled. Carl shrugged.

“C’mon, Sophia.” Sophia looked at her mother who just gave her a smile and a nod, and then she hurried off after her friend.

“Oh, young love,” Carol sighed.

“What?” Daryl muttered, turning off the engine. Carol nodded toward Carl and Sophia.

“I think Sophia is smitten.”

“Smitten? People still say that?”

“I do,” Carol teased.

“She likes Carl?” Daryl asked, glancing off toward the two of them.

“I think the feeling’s mutual.”

“Ain’t they like ten?”

“Thirteen,” Carol laughed. “They’re growing up. It’s sweet. Puppy love.”

“Never understood that. ‘Puppy love.’ I mean, everybody love puppies. And they grow up into dogs, and ya love them, too.” Carol grinned at that and walked around the Jeep to meet Daryl. He reached out for her. It was a reflex anymore. If she was close, he wanted to touch her. He pawed at her hips and tugged her flush against him. She blushed but didn’t back away. She bit her bottom lip when he leaned in close.

“I think it’s more that _they’re_ the puppies. They’re young and don’t even know what love is. Maybe they’ll grow out of it. Maybe they won’t.”

“Yeah? Well, all I know is I’ll be keepin’ a damn close eye on that Grimes boy from now on.” Carol laughed and pushed at his shoulder.

“I don’t think we have anything to worry about,” she laughed. “They’re sweet. He’s a good friend to her. I’m glad she has that.”

“Ok, you two,” Andrea sighed, stepping out of the dorm. “Do you _have_ to flaunt your happiness around all of us miserable single people?” A grin spread over the blonde woman’s face, and Daryl reluctantly let Carol go. “Find anything good?”

“A few things,” Carol nodded. “We’re going to make a group trip this week. Want to come?”

“God, yes. I’ve been itching to get some field time in. Take any walkers down?”

“Just with the car,” Daryl nodded. “Whole group of ‘em crowded around us on one of the back roads.”

“What were you doing stopped on a back road where…” She saw the blush in Carol’s cheeks, and she cleared her throat. “Never mind. I don’t wanna know.” Daryl grunted something under his breath, and Carol nudged him with her elbow.

“Rick around?” he asked, changing the subject.

“Oh, uh, yeah. He’s back in the school looking over maps with Shane and Glenn.”

“They playing nice?” Daryl asked, squinting in the sunlight.

“Yeah, but probably because Glenn’s there,” Andrea pointed out with an eyeroll as T-Dog came walking up.

“Oh, that reminds me. I need to get something to Lori.” She grabbed a bottle of pills out of one of the boxes in the back. “She inside?”

“Yeah, she’s feeling pretty rough today,” Andrea said with a nod. “Poor thing. I would _not_ wish pregnancy on anybody during this mess.”

“Mess? You talk about it like it’s temporary,” T-Dog muttered with a shake of his head. “This is the new normal. The world might be trying to die, but if people stop having babies, it’ll be dead a hell of a lot sooner.”

“You want to carry around a baby for nine months and then give birth with no epidural?” Andrea asked, raising her eyebrows at him. T-Dog backed off nervously and rubbed the back of his bald head.

“No?”

“Then mind your business.” She shot him an amused look, and he rolled his eyes. She turned back to Carol. “Anyway, last I saw her, she was in her room.”

“Thanks,” Carol grinned. She leaned over and pressed a kiss to the corner of Daryl’s mouth. “I’ll see _you_ soon.” She winked at him, and he swallowed hard, his dick twitching in his pants at the memory of Carol’s promise. _Fuck_. Now he wasn’t going to be able to think of anything else for the rest of the day. She flashed him a wicked grin before she turned around, and he let out a little groan.

“You good over there?” T-Dog asked, looking at Daryl who had started to sweat despite the cold air that chilled his skin. Daryl shot him a glare and grabbed a box out of the back of the Jeep, unable to resist one last look at Carol’s ass as she sauntered into the dorm.

“Yeah, just help me with these boxes before we freeze to death, will ya?”

*~*~*~*~*~

“Oh God,” Lori sighed, taking the bottle of nausea medicine from Carol. “You’re a lifesaver. Thank you so much.” She took a pill from the bottle and swallowed it down with a couple gulps from her water bottle. “Where’d you find this?”

“A house we scavenged down the road. There were ultrasound pictures pinned to a bulletin board. I found some prenatals, too.”

“God, that’s sad,” Lori sighed. “But thank you for getting them.” She put her hand on her belly and lay back against the bed. “This morning sickness has to stop soon, right? I mean, I’m throwing up at night, too. It wasn’t that bad with Carl.”

“I’m sorry you feel so bad,” Carol frowned.

“You’ve been feeling bad, too. Your headaches getting any better?”

“Some. I haven’t had one for a few days, so I’ll chalk that up to a win. I think it was just exhaustion.” She smiled a little and ran her fingers through her hair. “Is Rick helping you?”

“Yeah. He does what he can.” She shrugged. “Shane brought me some stale crackers from the kitchen earlier.”

“Did he?” Carol asked, brows shooting up.

“Yeah,” she smiled tiredly. “He’s trying. Rick’s trying. Carl’s still pissed at me. I don’t blame him. _I’m_ pissed at me.” She shook her head and pressed the heels of her hands into her eyes. “God, I just want to feel halfway decent for one day. The crackers helped a little. Shane’s trying.”

“And Rick’s ok with it?”

“You know that old gimmick in the movies where one person holds a gun on someone, that person holds a gun on someone, and the third person holds a gun on the first person? I kind of feel we’re in a weird stalemate like that right now. I don’t know.” Carol sat down on the edge of Lori’s bed and smiled at her. Lori chuckled and placed her hand on her chest. “You know, I felt like I was getting called to the principal’s office when Hershel made us come sit down with him the other day.”

“Hershel’s a wise man,” Carol said with a little shrug. “Seems like whatever he said to you and Shane and Rick helped.”

“It did. A little. He told us a story about his first wife dying and how he got re-married and had Beth. It didn’t really fit my situation, but if it wasn’t for Shane, I wouldn’t be pregnant. It’s his baby as much as mine. We can’t go out and do a paternity test, but I know. There’s no question.”

“Rick’s ok?”

“I don’t think any of us are,” Lori shrugged. “Most days, I feel like we’re barely holding this marriage together. I don’t know if it’s going to work out. But he’s trying. I’m trying. And he tells me he wants to be there for this baby, too. I just have to look at it like…this baby’s going to have three parents that love it, and that’s more than a lot of people get. Some people don’t even have two. Some don’t have one.” Carol nodded and shrugged a shoulder.

“It’s a start,” Carol said with a nod. “I hope it works out for all of you.”

“Me too. I just don’t know _how_ it’s supposed to work.”

“It’ll work out. It will. All you have to worry about is taking care of yourself and that baby. The rest will work out in time. And Rick and Shane are big boys. They can learn to get along if that’s what’s best for the baby.”

“God,” Lori sighed, “how do you do that? You have a way of making me feel so much better. I run these things through my own head, and I stress myself out. But you say them, and I feel like everything really is going to be ok. Maybe it’s the hormones. I don’t know. Maybe it’s the fact that you brought me these nausea meds, and damn, I think they’re already working. You’re my hero.” Carol laughed at that, and she patted Lori’s hand.

“Get some rest. I’m gonna go shower, and I’ll check on you before bed.” She started for the door.

“Carol?”

“Hmm?” she asked, turning.

“Thank you. You’re a good friend. I really appreciate...I just…thank you.” Carol smiled right back at her and pointed at her.

“Rest,” she insisted.

“Yes, ma’am,” Lori laughed. Carol grinned brightly at her before closing the door and heading off to the showers.

_Author’s Note: Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Please let me know what you think. Feedback is very much appreciated._


	28. Chapter 28

Twenty-Eight

The rest of the afternoon and evening was pretty quiet around Claypool. After Carol’s shower, she’d checked on Lori again before spending some time with Sophia. It was T-Dog’s turn in the kitchen, but Carol helped him out a little. After everyone was fed and ready to turn in, Daryl hit the showers while Carol checked on Sophia. When she retired to her and Daryl’s room, she shivered and turned on the heater under the window. The group had agreed to rotate nights with the heaters in order to conserve as much fuel for the generator as possible. Tonight, it was Carol and Daryl’s turn as well as Sophia’s and Andrea’s. Everyone else was hunkering down with extra blankets for warmth.

Carol was thankful for the heat tonight. Usually, Daryl kept her plenty warm, but this night was especially cold. She wasn’t looking forward to what bitter cold the winter would bring, but she figured at least they had walls to protect them from the wind. That was better than nothing.

As soon as the room warmed a little, Carol changed into the flannel pajamas she’d scavenged over a week ago. She put an extra pair of socks on, and chuckled to herself that she was going to be making good on her promise to Daryl least sexy outfit she’d ever worn. But, it was warm and comfortable, and she was pretty sure Daryl really wouldn’t give a shit what she was wearing when her mouth was on his dick.

When Daryl stepped in, he shut the door and immediately brought the chair up to prop under the handle. It was something they did every night now, just in case, because the last thing either of them wanted was an unannounced audience or somebody walking back from taking a piss and returning to the wrong room. Glenn had walked in on them one night in the middle of sex, but thankfully for all of them, the room had been pitch dark, and he’d only gotten a glimpse of Daryl’s blanket-covered backside with Carol’s legs over his shoulders. Never again, they’d agreed.

Carol watched him from where she sat at the edge of their pushed-together beds. He pulled his shirt over his head and hung it up on the hook behind the door. He turned again, the scars on his back stretching when he bent down to tug his boots off. He stripped all the way down to his boxers, and when he turned around, Carol was seductively watching him with her index finger poked between her lips like a lollipop. She took it out with a pop and crooked that same finger at him. Daryl was already half-hard. Hell, he’d been uncomfortable all damned afternoon with Carol’s promise on his mind.

He still couldn’t get over the way she looked at him. Those beautiful blue eyes stared up at him like he was everything, and he wasn’t sure he’d ever be used to that.

“C’mere,” she said sweetly from the bed, patting the mattress beside her.

“Ya really don’t have to…”

“I told you I wanted to,” she insisted. Then a little grin spread across her face, and she shrugged. “But if you’re turning down a blow job, I can just read a book or some—” He practically pounced on her then, and she laughed when he pressed her back against the mattress. “Hey! I thought this was your turn?”

“Is my turn,” he growled, peppering kisses along her collarbone. Carol bit her bottom lip and closed her eyes as his tongue and lips worked against her skin. She gasped when his hand slid up her shirt. His fingertips skimmed over her stomach and over her bare breast, teasing a nipple with his thumb and forefinger.

“Daryl,” she panted. He kissed her then, slowly and deeply, slipping his tongue between her lips and groaning when she met his kiss hungrily. His hand slipped away from her breast, this time coming down the waistband of her pants and slipping inside her panties. She cried out when he brushed his fingertips against her folds, toying with her until she was writhing beneath him. “Oh God. Oh…” But before he could go any further, she pushed his hand away and pushed at his shoulders so she could wriggle out from under him. “You’re distracting me.” She wagged her finger at him, and he blushed. “Sit up and scoot back.” He did as she told him, scooting back so his back was pressed against the headboard.

She crawled between his legs then, grazing her hands up his thighs and over his hips before she dipped her hand inside of his boxers and stroked his cock. His head smacked against the headboard, and Carol looked up at him in surprise. He grabbed for a pillow and put it behind his head, and she bit her lip to keep from giggling.

She sprawled out between his spread legs, lying on her belly and kneading one of his thighs while stroking him with the other. He groaned, his eyes rolling back as she slowly stroked him.

She didn’t freeze up anymore when she did this for him. He’d been reluctant to try again after the first time. They’d talked about the way Ed had treated her, and while she made it clear she knew he’d never hurt her, he still didn’t want her doing anything she wasn’t comfortable with. Still, she had wanted to try again, and they had a few times. And she loved the look on his face every time. She loved the noises he made, the way his mouth fell open, the way he’d tremble just before he came.

The second she swirled her tongue around the head, his hips came up off the mattress. She gave him a couple more strokes with her hand before she took him into her mouth. The heat of her mouth and the suction of her lips was nearly too much for him to stand as she began to pump her hand in a steady rhythm, taking him in as far as she could before pulling all the way back up and releasing him with a wet _pop_.

“Fuckin’ hell,” he grunted, reaching for her. His hand cupped her chin, and she kissed his palm. Then she pushed his hand away and brought her full attention back to his cock, taking him in as far as she could, finding a comfortable rhythm that drove him crazy.

The sounds coming out his mouth were erotic all on their own. Her core was throbbing, and she needed sweet release, but she wanted this first. She wanted to watch him tremble and moan. She loved to watch his hips jerk and his stomach muscles clench when her hand moved down to give his balls some attention.

It wasn’t long before she felt that familiar tremble. His breath caught in his throat, and he tensed up.

“Carol,” he panted. This was usually her que to pull back. He started to grab for a tissue by the bed, but instead, she gripped him a little more firmly around the base. He couldn’t hold on any longer, and her eyes fluttered closed when he let go. He panted softly when Carol pulled back enough to swallow, and then she licked him from base to tip, sending a shiver through every nerve ending in his body. “Holy shit.” She wiped at the corner of her mouth, grabbed the tissue and promptly cleaned up the last remnants of his release before tossing the paper in the wastebasket by the bed. He stared at her for a moment, slowly tucking himself back into his pants, and she crawled up to flop down beside him on the bed.

She reached for a book and cleared her throat, sighing softly as if she’d just flopped down after doing the dishes or something.

“You’re really gonna read?” he asked, laying down on his side next to her.

“Hmm?”

“That’s it? You don’t want me to…”

“You already did. Twice, remember?” Daryl’s mouth opened and shut a couple times as he tried to figure out what the hell just happened.

“That’s…you mean, you don’t…I mean, if you don’t want to, we don’t have to. I just thought…” His face went red again, and that was when he realized Carol was grinning behind that book.

“Well,” she sighed dramatically. “If you insist.” Daryl grabbed the book from her hands and tossed it over his shoulder. It landed with a loud smack against the tile floor. Carol squealed with laughter, and he put his hand over her mouth.

“We ain’t in the car anymore, sweetheart,” he warned. “Best keep quiet.” Carol snorted and shimmied out of her pants and panties.

“Oh, I’ll do my best,” she grinned, spreading her legs for him. He stared at her like a man starved, and he pressed a kiss to her knee.

“Don’t think you got it in you to be quiet tonight.”

“Oh no? Well, if you’d stop running your mouth and start using it, we might find out.” Daryl let out a snort and stared at her for a moment before she erupted into laughter. Daryl shook his head and gave her thigh a little nudge.

“Smart ass,” he grumbled, pressing a kiss to her knee before showing her just how right he was.


	29. Chapter 29

Twenty-Nine

Carol sat on the edge of the bunk beds tapping one booted foot on the floor. Daryl paced back and forth, back and forth, and the more he paced, the harder he jerked at each turn. The harder he jerked, the more the nerves in Carol’s belly coiled.

“Come sit down,” Carol urged, patting the bunk beside her.

“How much longer?”

“Two minutes.”

“Fuck.”

“Daryl. It’s ok.”

“It ain’t ok,” he fumed. He saw her shoulders slump out of the corner of his eye, and he stopped. He turned to her and watched her pinch the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger. He approached her then and sat down next to her. He clasped his hands and leaned over his spread legs, staring at a tiny spider that crawled across the tile floor. He watched it for a moment before he stomped his foot on it and dragged his boot back, smudging the critter on the floor. “M’sorry. Ain’t your fault. I ain’t mad. Just worried about ya.”

Carol shook her head and ran her fingers through her hair. This wasn’t at all what she thought she’d be doing on this cold day. By her count, it was early December. The cold snap had drawn out another month, and Winter had come to Claypool. The first snow had fallen, and while snow wasn’t entirely unusual for Georgia, the amount of it was. It had to be a record. Sophia and Carl were out there throwing snowballs at each other. Rick, Shane and Andrea were on a supply run, and Carol had counted on getting some inventory done in the kitchen that day. Instead, she was waiting on a piece of plastic to finish seasoning so they could both breathe again.

“Maybe this is why you been getting them headaches,” Daryl reasoned.

“Daryl…”

“Lori said she had ‘em. And you’re fillin’ out a little. I don’t mean that in a bad way. I just noticed, you’re…fuller than ya were before.” His gaze moved down the swell of her breasts and over the curve of her hips for a moment, and Carol huffed out an exasperated breath. She was still slender and petite, but he knew her body well enough to notice subtle changes. “I ain’t complainin’, I just…”

“We’ve haven’t exactly been eating healthy. A lot of empty calories, you know?”

“Still, I just noticed…”

“Daryl,” she said again, this time sternly. “I told you…”

“Yeah, you told me you can’t have more kids. But what if you can? What if you are?” Daryl asked, turning to look at her.

“I told you.”

“I was listenin’. You said you had scar tissue, that you never got pregnant again after that. That it was five years and it never happened again.” Carol took a deep breath, and she looked at him.

“Even if I could, which I don’t think I can, I’d lose it.” She looked down at her hands. They were clasped tightly in her lap, and her knuckles were turning white. “If I’m pregnant, I’ll lose it. I know I will.” She sighed heavily and leaned her elbows on her lap, burying her face in her hands. “I’m not pregnant. I can’t be pregnant.” She was still a moment, until Daryl pulled his arm around her. She leaned into him and let out a shaky breath. “I can’t be pregnant.”

“If you are, I’m here. Ya know that, right? You don’t gotta go through that alone.”

“I know,” she sniffled.

“I just don’t want ya to go through that. I don’t want ya to hurt. You don’t deserve that.” Carol sniffled then and lifted her head. Daryl brought his hand to her cheek and wiped a tear away with his calloused thumb. “Hershel said ya might just need more iron, right?” Carol nodded. “I’ll get ya some next time I go out. That’s probably all it is, anyway, right?”

“Right,” Carol sniffled, offering him a teary smile. “That’s probably all it is.”

Honestly, she wasn’t sure what she was more afraid of. While the rational part of her knew that it was likely lack of sleep and proper nutrients that was giving her headaches and making her tired, and that it couldn’t possibly be pregnancy, the other part of her worried about what it was if it wasn’t either of those things. What if she was sick? Really sick? She felt ok, besides the headaches, but they weren’t impossible to deal with. She was just worn out. It wasn’t like she could go get herself checked out by a specialist, but the worry was there. Any of them could be sick, and nobody would know it until things got really bad.

“Hey,” he said quietly. “You’re worryin’.”

“I’m not.”

“You’re a real bad liar.”

“I thought it sounded good,” she shrugged. Daryl chuckled then, cupping Carol’s face in his hand.

“Hey. C’mere.” She looked him in the eye, and she leaned in to press her lips against his. “I love you. Whatever else happens, I love you.” She sniffled and nodded and kissed him again. When she pulled back, she briskly wiped at her eyes and stood.

“Well, I know it’s been more than two minutes. We might as well stop talking about what ifs and get back to reality.” She started over toward the desk, but he took her hand and stopped her.

“Hey.” She turned then, and she down at him looking up at her. His eyes were filled with worry and love and so many things that made the lump in her throat swell a little bigger. She stepped back toward him, standing between his legs. He took her other hand in his. “Everything’s gonna be ok.”

“I know,” she whispered. She leaned down and kissed them then, and when he finally let go of her hands, she turned back toward the desk. He stood then, taking a couple steps toward her. She leaned over the desk, her hands spread out on the surface, and a moment later, he watched her shoulders shake.

“Carol?” She turned then, tears in her eyes. Her knees gave out, and she started to slump down, but Daryl crossed the gap between them and pulled her into his arms. “Hey. Hey, it’s ok.”

“It’s not ok,” she choked out. “It’s not ok.”


	30. Chapter 30

Thirty

Daryl took a long puff on a cigarette as he stared out through the slats in the front gate. The sound of small feet crunching on snow gave away his visitor long before she arrived, but he didn’t turn around. After all, he’d been helping to teach her and Carl how to track and hunt for a while now, and they both thought they were pretty stealthy in the sneaking up department. They had a lot to learn.

“I thought you quit smoking.” Sophia wrapped her arms around herself and shivered.

“What’re you doin’ out in this cold? You should go back in.”

“My room’s cold, too. Besides, I can’t sleep.”

“Bad dreams?” He glanced down at her. The yellow light from the lantern in her hand illuminated her sad face. She shook her head and looked up at him.

“Is my mom ok?” She stared up at him for a moment, and he took another drag on his cigarette before flicking the ash down in the snow.

“Sure she’s ok,” he said quietly.

“She’s been sad the last couple of days. She tries not to show it when I’m around, but I’m not dumb.”

“No, you ain’t dumb. But your mama’s gonna be fine.”

“Gonna? So there is something wrong?” Sophia asked.

“Nothin’s wrong,” he insisted. He took another puff on his cigarette.

“You suck at lying.”

“You been hangin’ around that Grimes’ boy too much. That mouth on you.”

“Suck’s not a bad word. You say a lot worse words.”

“’Cause I’m a grown up,” he countered.

“Is that why you smoke? Because you’re a grown up?” Daryl snorted and licked his lips before tossing the cigarette butt down in the snow.

“I was your age when I started smokin’.”

“Gross,” Sophia murmured. “I don’t even like the smell.”

“Yeah, me neither.”

“Then why do you do it?” she asked. Daryl shifted next to her and cleared his throat.

“You sure ask a lot of questions.” Sophia blinked up at him. “I started smokin’ ‘cause my brother smoked. I wanted to be like him.”

“Your brother? You mean that mean man from way back in Atlanta?” Sophia balked.

“Yeah, well, he was an asshole, but he was still my big brother, you know? It just got to be a habit. Ain’t smoked much in a while.”

“So why’d you start again?”

“Found a pack hidden in one of the rooms. Guess one of the kids that used to be here had a habit, too.”

“My dad smoked,” Sophia sighed. “He was mean like your brother. Meaner, even.”

“Yeah, I know,” Daryl bit out.

“I’m glad he’s dead.” Sophia looked up at him again. “Is that wrong?”

“My dad’s dead, too. I’m glad. Is that wrong?”

“Was he mean like my dad?”

“Oh yeah,” Daryl murmured. “He was real mean.” He turned and leaned against the gate and looked down at Sophia. She’d grown about three inches since the summer, and those soulful eyes reminded him more and more of her mother every day.

“My mom smiles a lot now. Maybe not the last couple of days, but she does. Do you love my mom?” Daryl swallowed hard as the kid continued to question him, and for a moment, he felt like he was being interrogated like some criminal in a police show. But, he also knew the kid had had a rough start in life, maybe not the same kind of rough start he’d had, but she’d been through enough. He nodded.

“Yeah. I love your mama.”

“She loves you, too?”

“Mmhmm.”

“She told you?”

“’Course she did.”

“Good,” Sophia said quietly. “Do you know why she’s sad? And don’t say she’s fine, ‘cause I’d know if you’re lying.” Daryl sighed and shifted his weight from foot to foot. He ran his hand over his face and cleared his throat before pushing back off the gate and taking a step toward Sophia.

“Your mama’s ok,” Daryl promised. “She just needs to rest right now is all.” He could tell the kid wasn’t entirely convinced, but he was glad when she nodded and decided to accept his answer. “You best get inside. Cold room or not, this wind’s what’ll get ya.”

“I guess so,” Sophia sighed. She started to turn, but Daryl saw a light flicker in her eyes. She gasped, and he turned to see a set of headlights coming up the road about a mile back. “Who’s that?”

“None of our people,” Daryl bit out. “C’mon.” He grabbed the arm of Sophia’s coat and tugged her back against the brick post that held the gates. He quickly doused her lantern with snow, letting only the half-moon light their way. The sound of the car’s engine drew closer and closer until he could hear the rattle under the hood as the car was put into park. Daryl glanced around, seeing no sign of light coming from any of the windows, but he hoped nobody got up to take a piss and turned a light on in the next few minutes.

The car door opened, and feet crunched on the fresh snow outside.

“I swear I saw a light.”

“You _thought_ you saw a light,” a woman countered.

“I know what I saw. ”

“You’ve been awake for nearly forty-eight hours. You’re hallucinating. I didn’t see a thing.”

“Still. Look what we found. We should tell the boss about this place, Rosita.” Rosita scoffed.

“What’s the boss gonna want with an old school, anyway?” she asked, stepping closer to the gates. Sophia gasped, and Daryl put his hand over her mouth.

“You notice anything?” the man asked.

“The footprints and tire tracks? I noticed those before we pulled up. Somebody’s been here. Somebody might be here. But the place is dark. Cold.”

“It’s shelter. Better than what we’ve got now at the old train station,” the man insisted. “C’mon, Rosita. Let’s just check it out.”

“I’m not going in there. Do you know how many of those things could be in there? No. We’re late enough getting back as it is. Come _on,_ Aaron. Let’s get out of here. I don’t want to spend another night out here in the cold. And I know you want to get back to Jesus. Let’s just take this junk back and keep moving. Boss wants to move south, and I don’t know about you, but I’d rather go someplace warm than stay here another day.”

“I still say I saw a light,” Aaron muttered.

“I believe you,” Rosita grumbled, as the footsteps retreated back toward the car.

“You’re patronizing me.”

“No I’m not,” she scoffed. “Oh, no. No no. I’m driving.”

“What? Why?”

“Because you’re hallucinating. I’m good to go. Now scooch. Move it.” The man sighed, and Daryl peeked around the brick pillar in time to see the car doors shut and the tail lights blaze red. When the car sped off, Daryl let out a breath he’d been holding, and he removed his hand from Sophia’s mouth.

“We should tell Mr. Grimes,” she whispered. Daryl nodded with a little grunt, and he motioned for her to follow him back toward the dorms.

*~*~*~*~*~*

“I don’t like this, man,” Shane murmured, running his hand through his curly, dark hair. He was pacing in front of the line of tables in the cafeteria. Everyone looked exhausted, and Hershel and Andrea were passing around pots of coffee. Lori scrunched her nose up at the smell and waved her hand to pass.

“I don’t think they’re coming back,” Sophia said quietly from where she sat next to her mother. “It sounded like they weren’t, right, Daryl?”

“Yeah, it sounded that way,” he muttered. “Still, these are the first people we’ve seen in damn near six months. Don’t know who they are, how many people they got. Who knows? They might change their mind, tell whoever this boss is of theirs and come on back.” He chewed the side of his thumb and glanced at Carol who looked flat out exhausted.

“We need to be ready for this,” Shane insisted. Rick nodded.

“I agree. This is our home. We made it ours. We don’t need anybody else coming along to take what’s ours. We’ve got children here.” He looked to Carl and Sophia and then to Lori.

“We don’t even know they’re dangerous, Rick,” Hershel pointed out. “Daryl? Did you see any sort of weapon on them?” Daryl shook his head. “Sophia?”

“No, sir. But I didn’t really get a look at them, either. I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to be sorry,” Carol said softly, stroking her daughter’s hair. Sophia gave her mother a sad smile and sighed.

“I don’t want to leave again. I like it here.”

“Nobody’s leaving,” Rick insisted. “This is our home. If they come back, we’ll let them know.”

“But, Dad? What if want this place anyway?” Carl asked, looking his father right in the eye. Rick looked to Lori and Shane and then to Daryl. He swallowed hard and folded his arms across his chest.

“We’ve got weapons to defend this place.”

“Oh my God,” Lori interjected, covering her face with her hands.

“The walls are sound,” Rick bit out, a bit louder. “They’ll hold.”

“You’re really not suggesting what I think you’re suggesting, are you?” Lori asked, gaping at him. Rick’s nostril’s flared, and Hershel spoke up.

“We don’t know these people. We don’t know if they’re coming back. But if our first reaction is to shoot and fight, then we’ll all end up dead, and it’ll all be for nothing.” He looked to Lori and then to Carl and Sophia. “We have children here. We have new life coming in the spring. Yes, that should be protected at all costs, but violence shouldn’t be the first response to new people.” He looked to Rick. “If we’d reacted that way when your group came along, Rick, where would we be now?”

“We don’t know these people,” Rick insisted.

“We didn’t know you, either,” Maggie pointed out. She looked around the group. “We took a chance because a little girl was hurt, and it turned out for the best.”

“You really think it’s gonna be the same this time around if they come back?” Rick asked. He looked to Daryl. “Tell me you’re with me on this one.”

“I don’t know,” Daryl admitted quietly. “We got to protect ourselves first. We’re tryin’ to survive. But so are they.” He motioned toward the outside. “Least we can do is talk to ‘em. We got a gate between us. We’ll do it careful. One of them draws on us, we’ll be ready.”

“Jesus Christ. Way to pussy out and sit on the fence, Dixon,” Shane scoffed. Daryl pushed his chair back and stood, glaring at him. Carol put her hand on his arm, but he stayed standing.

“I got a family to protect, and the last thing I want is folks shootin’ at each other ‘cause they’re too scared to talk instead of fight. Now I’ll be ready to fight if it comes down to it, but I ain’t willin’ to hurt a bunch of innocent folks before we even find out who these people are.” Daryl looked from Rick to Shane and then to Hershel. “We expected there’d be more people out there. Couldn’t be just us.”

“They’re strangers,” Shane countered. “You said yourself they seemed interested in the place. Could be they’d get through our gates, kill all of us and take what’s ours for themselves.”

“Or they could join us,” Hershel offered. “If it came to that.”

“If you ask me, all this talking about something that might never happen isn’t doing a bit of good,” T-Dog muttered, rubbing his eyes with his knuckles. “If you ask me, we ought to get some shut eye and go about our business in the morning.”

“I think we need to be careful,” Carol said quietly. “It’s good to be prepared, but we can’t get paranoid. That’ll just make us impulsive. We should keep someone on watch at all times, rotate shifts every few hours. There’s a room in the second dorm on the third floor that has a perfect view of the gate at the roads. We’ll know if someone’s coming.”

“I agree with Carol,” Andrea yawned.

“I agree,” Lori nodded. “And I don’t think it’d hurt to get a few extra shooting lessons in.”

“I’ll take a group out in the morning,” Shane agreed.

“Alright,” Rick said with a stiff nod. “Let’s all try to get some rest. I’ll take first watch.”

*~*~*~*~*~*

When Daryl opened the door to their room, he found Carol sitting in bed with a book spread out in her lap. However, she was distracted by something on the far wall, because she was staring off into space when he shut the door. She only flinched and pulled herself out of it when he tossed his shirt at the foot of their bed.

“You ok?” he asked quietly, knowing that was a loaded question these days.

“Mmm,” she hummed softly, stretching and closing her book. She reached over and put it on the bedside table before scooting over to make room for Daryl.

“Oh, I got somethin’ for ya.” He reached into his pants pocket and came out with a little pill bottle. “I swiped some from Lori’s stash.”

“Daryl, you shouldn’t have done that.” Daryl tossed the bottle at her. It rattled when she caught it, and he started to change into an old sweat suit. It was a bitterly cold night, and it wasn’t their turn for the heat. Carol had already draped two extra blankets across the bed.

“We can get more,” he shrugged.

“Lori needs them,” Carol insisted.

“Yeah, I know. So do you.” He got into bed to sit next to Carol and tucked his legs under the blankets. Carol looked down at the old aspirin bottle that hid several prenatal vitamins inside.

“Daryl, I told you…”

“I know what ya told me. Ya told me you couldn’t get pregnant. But ya did.” He put his hand over hers.

“But the doctor said…”

“Doctors ain’t always right. Don’t they call what they do practicin’?” Carol sighed heavily, but Daryl wasn’t deterred. “Two of them babies you lost was ‘cause of that asshole husband of yours. And what was it the doctor said exactly?”

“Daryl…” She saw the determined look on his face, and she leaned her head back against the headboard. “He said that _if_ I could get pregnant, I probably wouldn’t stay pregnant. I have a lot of scar tissue from the last one.” She looked down at her hands.

“He said _if_ and _probably_. That ain’t exact, Carol.”

“Don’t,” she whispered, shaking her head. “I can’t.” Daryl watched as she tensed and blinked back tears. “I can’t.” Daryl nodded then, and he swallowed hard.

“M’sorry. I know you’re scared.”

“I’m beyond scared, Daryl,” she choked out. “This shoudn’t be happening. Especially not now. Not here.” She wiped at her eyes with the backs of her hands.

“I know. But it is.”

“See, that’s what I’m talking about. You’re already talking about this like it’s a sure thing. Like we’re going to have this baby and try to keep it alive in all of this mess. I _can’t_ do that, Daryl. I had Sophia, and she was beautiful, and then every time I got pregnant after she was born, I got attached, and…”

“I know.”

“You don’t know,” she bit out. She sucked in a deep, shaking breath. “You could never know. Not really.” She took his hand in hers and gave it a squeeze. “I’ll take the vitamins. I’ll do what I can, but I know how this is gonna end. I just don’t want you to get too attached, and I can already see that you are.” Daryl chewed the inside of his lip for a moment, and then, and then something changed in his eyes.

“If somethin’ goes wrong, I don’t wanna…I don’t want ya to…” The words jumbled on his tongue, and Carol squeezed his hand.

“I’ll talk to Hershel soon,” she said quietly. “Just Hershel. Daryl, I don’t want to tell people. Not now. I want to wait. I’d rather nobody else know, you know, in case…” Daryl nodded then.

“Ok.” He looked up at her and saw the fear and worry in her eyes, and he swallowed hard against the lump in his throat. “Are you ok? Are you gonna be ok?”

“I’ll be ok. I just…I need you to not get…” She huffed out a frustrated breath. “I need you to be prepared.” Daryl nodded again, and he squeezed her hand.

“Ok. I will be. I’ll be here, ya know. I ain’t goin’ nowhere. Even if these new folks show up, you and Sophia are what matters. If they show up and things go south…”

“If things happen with them at all,” Carol corrected him, “we’ll be prepared for that, too.” She looked at the bottle of pills in her hand again and sighed. “I never thought I’d be doing this all over again.”

“M’sorry.”

“Hey, it’s just as much my fault as it is yours,” she said with a little shrug. “We’ll just have to be more careful when this is all over.” With a sigh, she put the bottle of pills aside and gave him a weak smile, her eyes still glassy and tear-filled. “I love you.” She leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth before sliding down in the bed and pulling the covers up over her. Daryl looked down at her, watched the way she put her hand on her stomach before quickly moving it away. He hated that this was happening to her. He’d never thought much about being a father, but the idea of having a baby with her wasn’t the worst idea he’d ever heard. But the fact that she was scared shitless and so certain that she was going to lose it left him feeling helpless and powerless. How was he supposed to comfort her when she was so certain there was no hope?

He leaned over and turned out the lantern by their bed and scooted down to lay beside her. He turned and pulled her back against him, wrapping his arms around her and nuzzling his nose against the back of her neck. She sighed softly and laced her fingers with his, letting him know that somehow they were going to be ok.

“I love you, too,” he murmured, pressing a kiss to the back of her neck before he closed his eyes and attempted to get some sleep.

_Author’s Note: Thank you to those of you who are still reading. I do hope you’ll comment and let me know what you think. Feedback is always appreciated. Thanks again!_


	31. Chapter 31

Thirty-One

“I had him!” Carol huffed, wiping the sweat from her forehead. She leaned against the wall and glared at Daryl who was wiping off the butt of his crossbow. The walker lay at his feet while the remnants of its brain and skull remained on the wall over Carol’s shoulder.

“I had a better shot. He had you cornered,” Daryl argued. “Besides, you took down three just clearing the front of the store. It was the least I could do.”

“I can take care of myself,” she huffed. Daryl narrowed his eyes at her.

“I know that. I had your back. It’s what we do.” Carol looked down then, feeling silly for getting bent out of shape about who got the kill.

“I know,” she huffed.

“So why do I feel like you’re pissed at me?” He took a step back, and Carol stepped away from the wall and over the walker’s corpse.

“I’m not,” she sighed. “Sorry.” She felt something wet on her neck and realized it was splatter from the kill. She groaned.

“Here.” Daryl handed her a towel from a close by shelf. She groaned and wiped at the gunk, craning her neck so Daryl could inspect it. “You’re good.”

“Thanks.” She tossed the towel down and stuck her knife back into her belt. She took a step toward him when Andrea came running over.

“You guys ok?” she asked. “I was over in pharmacy when I heard you guys yelling.”

“We’re fine,” Daryl panted, gesturing toward the corpse on the floor.

“Jesus. How’d we miss that one?” Andrea asked, hiking the strap of her backpack up her shoulder.

“Trapped under a rack that fell,” Carol muttered, kneeling down to search the tattered pockets of the body. She came up with a wallet and a loaded gun. She stood up again and opened the wallet. “Abraham Ford. Military ID.” She placed the wallet respectfully back in his pocket. “Looks like he was staying here.” She nodded toward a tent set up in the middle of one of the aisles. “Maybe he left a few things behind.”

“Was he bit?” Andrea asked. She knelt down to pull the boots off of the corpse. They were new and sturdy and might come in handy. He certainly wasn’t going to be using them anymore.

“On the neck.” Carol pointed toward the bite-like ring that was red and putrefying on the skin.

“God,” Andrea bit out, holding back the urge to gag.

“Opted out is my guess. Gunshot through the bottom of his chin. Guess he must’ve slipped. Missed his brain, blew his teeth and nose to hell,” Daryl murmured. He glanced at Andrea. “I think he was the last one, but you best be careful, and keep your weapon ready.” Andrea nodded.

“Right. I’m going back to pharmacy. You two take the canned goods aisle.”

“We’re on it,” Carol said with a nod. Andrea turned and hurried off to the other side of the store, and Carol started for the tent. “I’ll take a look.” Daryl reached out for her arm, gently curling his fingers around her wrist. She turned and looked at him.

“I’ll check it.”

“Daryl…”

“I know. I know. You can take care of yourself,” he said with a little grin. “I ain’t tryin’ to step on your toes. ‘Sides, I’d probably grab all the wrong shit. We’d end up eatin’ boiled peanuts for two weeks or somethin’.”

“Hey, with the right spices, I can do _something_ with them,” she offered with a tease, letting him know she really wasn’t pissed. Her hormones were off the charts lately, and she figured part of it was all in her head. Ever since those two pink lines showed up on that damned plastic stick, she’d _felt_ pregnant. It was like all everything she’d been going through before she found had gotten worse, and the other symptoms started. Nausea. Mood swings. Sore breasts. And she was flat out exhausted half of the time. Daryl had let her sleep until noon the day before, and she still felt like she hadn’t slept a wink in a month. “Alright, you go check the tent. I’ll grab a cart and start going through the canned goods.” She leaned in and pressed a kiss to his cheek before hurrying off on her task.

Daryl turned and started toward the tent, wondering if Carol had noticed the blood spatter on the side of it. It was hidden in the shadows, but it was there. Something awful had gone down, and judging by the bite on ole Abe’s neck, he’d tried to put an end to himself before he could turn.

Daryl tapped his heel hard against the floor, keeping his eyes trained on the tent for any sign of movement. There was none, but he was still cautious, raising his crossbow and using it to peel back the front flap of the tent. A horrific smell that he could almost taste hit him like a ton of bricks. He spat and knelt down, peering into the tent to see three bodies in the same state of decay as the walker they’d just put down. It was hard to tell except by the clothing, but it appeared to have once been a woman, a little boy and a little girl. They all had bites and wounds, and they had all been put down.

Daryl could put the pieces together to tell a tragic story about a family hiding out in a grocery store. One of them got bit. Maybe the mom, maybe one of the kids. They turned in their sleep, attacked the rest of the family. They all died, one by one, leaving dad feverish and infected and alone.

Daryl glanced over his shoulder to see Carol tossing things into a shopping cart, and the realization that one day one of them would have to put the other down struck him like a bullet in the chest. He coughed and sputtered, the overbearing stench nothing compared to the stinging realization that this could easily be them someday.

“You ok?” Carol called, as Daryl pulled himself out of the tent and closed it up.

“Yeah,” he choked out. “Nothin’ worth grabbin’ in there.” He wiped his nose and Carol took a step closer.

“Oh God,” she groaned, covering her mouth with her hand. “That smell.” She looked at the tent behind him.

“You don’t wanna see that,” he said, holding up a hand. “Trust me. It ain’t somethin’ you’re gonna want to remember.”

“Oh,” she groaned. The smell was overpowering, and Daryl knew what was happening when Carol’s face paled. Her cheeks puffed out, and she turned, leaning over a bin of rotten fruit. She threw up, and Daryl winced at the sound. He wasn’t sure what he could do for it, so he took a step up, gently placing his hand on her back before she choked out a sound of protest and shrugged him away. When she was finished, she straightened up and wiped her mouth.

“Can I do anything?”

“Get me something to wash the taste out of my mouth,” she coughed. Daryl quickly ran to the juice aisle and grabbed the first thing he could find that wasn’t expired. Apple juice. He ran it over to her, and she opened the cap and guzzled a quarter of the jug down in one breath. When she was done, she screwed the cap back on and put the jug aside.

“Better?”

“Yeah,” she grimaced. “A little. I’ll probably throw that up later.”

“Here. How about these?” He tossed her a box of crackers, and she hugged them to her chest.

“Where’d you find these?” she asked, wide-eyed.

“Hidden behind the juice. Last box in the store, I’d wager.”

“Yeah, that’s what I looked for first.” She sighed and opened one of the plastic sleeves, taking a crisp cracker into her mouth and crunching down. She was surprised to find it wasn’t entirely stale, and her stomach growled in hunger with the first swallow. “Oh God. Thank you, Daryl.”

“Just tryin’ to help however I can.”

“Guys!” Andrea shouted, rushing across the store again. “We’ve got company!”

“Alive or…” Daryl grabbed the shopping cart, and Carol threw her pack over her shoulder.

“Very much dead! They got through the cart bay or something. We’ve gotta go out the back.”

“Fuck,” Daryl muttered. “C’mon. I saw a door behind the meat counter.” He motioned for Carol to follow, and as soon as Andrea caught up to them, they were all three scrambling past the counter and into the back warehouse. A loading dock door was half-open, and Daryl made a bee-line for it. He lifted the rusted door as far as he could and looked out. “Shit. Gotta be a nine-foot drop. I’ll go down first.”

“Be careful,” Carol urged, squeezing his hand. Daryl shoved the cart out first, and it fell with a metallic clatter that had them all cringing. Daryl looked down and realized he could hop down onto the side of the cart and shave a couple of feet off of his drop. So, that’s what he did. He let go of Carol’s hand, crouched down to do a quick calculation in his head, but the sound of walkers making their way into the warehouse left no time left to think. He leapt off of the ledge, landing hard on his back on the side of the metal cart. He groaned, his whole lower back twinging, but he didn’t have time to worry about that.

He stood then, reaching out. Andrea helped Carol lower herself down a ways, and Daryl caught Carol by the waist. She let go of Andrea’s hands, and they both fell back. Daryl broke Carol’s fall with his back, and she gasped when she heard him wheeze in pain.

“Are you ok?” she panted.

“Fine,” he bit out between gritted teeth. “You?”

“I’m ok.” She smoothed her hands down over the front of her shirt and stood up, helping him to his feet. Andrea took the plunge before they could even attempt to get up to help her, and she landed hard on her ankle, growling out in pain when pain tore through her leg.

“Fuck!” she screamed. “I think it’s broke.”

“C’mon. We’ll get you back to the car.” He flipped the car back right-side up and started tossing their supplies back into it. He looked to Carol and she nodded.

“I’ve got this. You help Andrea.” Daryl nodded then, moving to Andrea and draping her arm around his neck.

“Can you walk at all?”

“No. Fuck, it hurts.”

“Alright. Alright, I’ll carry ya.” He hoisted her up into his arms, and he started out around the building. Carol pushed the cart alongside him, but as they rounded the corner, a dozen walkers were ambling up alongside it, heading right for them.

“Daryl!” Andrea cried out. “Go back!”

“Shit. Carol!” Daryl bit out, as he caught sight of three more walkers coming up behind them. Carol acted instinctively and pushed the cart at them, sending two of them flying back. The third one kept coming for her, and she took her knife out, jabbing it deep in the walker’s temple. It went down quick, and Carol quickly put down the walkers she’d toppled over with the cart.

Daryl put Andrea back down and grabbed the shopping cart.

“Hold onto this,” he urged. Andrea nodded, biting back the urge to scream when she put too much pressure on her ankle. She lifted her foot a little, but the pain kept coming.

He reached for his gun, taking down three walkers that were coming too close.

“They’re just gonna keep coming,” Carol choked out. “We have to get out of here!” Walkers were stumbling off of the loading dock, landing in broken piles, bones jutting out of rotted flesh, raspy snarls coming from behind yellowed, gnashing teeth.

Daryl watched as Carol looked around, frantically trying to pinpoint a good direction to run. But there were too many walkers coming from around both sides of the building by now. That only meant one thing. The car was going to be impossible to get back to.

“Daryl,” Carol urged, popping off a couple of shots at nearby walkers.

“C’mon. Let’s make a wide circle around, see if we can’t make it back to the car.” Daryl knew it was a long shot, but they had to do something or die.

“You should go. Go! I’m gonna slow you down,” Andrea ordered.

“We ain’t leavin’ no one behind!” Daryl snapped. “Come on. We’re goin’ around!” Another walker got too close to Andrea, and before she could shoot it, it had her hair in its hand. She screamed out, terror in her wide eyes, and before Daryl or Carol could react, the walker’s head blew to bits, and Andrea fell back with a scream. A series of rapid shots fired, cutting through the herd of walkers. Daryl grabbed Carol, tugging her down with him while he kept his gun at the ready. In moments, the snarling and gnashing and quieted down to nothing more than a few desperate growls from the pile of broken corpses under the loading dock.

The soft _glug glug glug_ of liquid escaping the canned goods from the shopping cart announced that their loot was gone. Carol groaned, pulling herself up onto her knees and brushing off her shirt.

“You ok?” Daryl asked. She nodded, looking down at the scraped up palms of her hand. She brushed the dirt and gravel away.

“I’ll live.”

The crunch of gravel and scrape of bullet casings under heavy boots had Carol scrambling to her feet with her gun poised. Daryl scrambled up too, and Andrea hollered when a pair of hands grabbed her and hoisted her up to her feet.

“Well, look what the cat dragged in,” a familiar voice laughed, pulling off a military-grade helmet. The automatic rifle strapped to his chest was still smoking. Daryl’s breath caught in his throat when he looked right into the eyes of a man he’d long ago given up hope of finding. He felt Carol’s hand on his arm, and he knew he wasn’t seeing things. This was real.

“Oh my God,” she whispered beside him. He blinked in surprise and swallowed hard before taking a step forward.

“Merle?”

_Author’s Note: Thank you guys so much for reading! Please, please let me know what you thought of the chapter and if you’d like to see more. Feedback really is appreciated. It means more than you know! Thanks so much again!_


	32. Chapter 32

Thirty-Two

“Whadda we got here?” Merle asked with a laugh. “This all that’s left of the old group? I gotta say, Darylina, I ain’t surprised. Didn’t think none of ya had it in ya to survive the summer, much less make it to the cold months.” Daryl looked at Carol, and he couldn’t quite read the expression on her face. It was something resembling bewilderment and anxiety, and he was pretty sure that look on her face matched the feeling that was rumbling around in his gut right then.

Daryl’s gaze moved to the steel cap on the end of Merle’s injured arm. It was solid and sound, and when Merle propped the butt of his rifle on it, he realized Merle had adapted pretty damn well to only having one hand.

“Merle, you…where’d you come from?” Daryl wasn’t sure that was really the first question he wanted to ask his brother, but it was the first thing that fell out of his mouth. Other questions like _how’d you survive,_ and _where the hell’d you go_ were now scrambling around in the forefront of his brain.

Two more people came running around the side of the building. One was a young woman with dark hair and dark eyes. The other was a young man with darker eyes and darker hair that was pulled back behind his head. He looked panicked, like maybe this was his first time out on a mission in a while.

“Uh, Merle? Dude, I hate to interrupt this…whatever this is, but we’ve got to _go_ ,” the woman said, holding her rifle like a kid playing soldier. Her eyes were wide and scared, but she didn’t look half as freaked out as the other guy.

“Now, hold on now, girlie. We’ve got some folks that need savin’.” Daryl narrowed his eyes at his brother.

“I’m all for that,” the man said with a hushed whisper. “But we’ve got about fifty growlers two blocks down heading right for us. Not to mention the thirty or so that got in the store and are trying to find a way out.”

“We have a car,” Andrea bit out through the pain. Merle shook his head.

“Can’t chance it. If ya need it that bad, come back for it after the geeks clear out. Might still be here. Too many of them things out there. Come on. We got a truck. We’ll get you folks the hell outta here.” Daryl stood in front of Carol and eyed his brother. They’d brought a walkie along with them, but it was of no use now. They had no way to call for backup. They were going to have to take care of themselves if this went south.

“Where the hell are you takin’ us?”

“You really wanna sit here and play catch up, or do you wanna live? Seems to me Blondie here needs a doctor, and the church mouse back there—Carol, right? —is lookin’ a little green around the gills herself.” Daryl looked at Carol again, and she did look pretty pale. She groaned and held her hand over her mouth, and Daryl held onto her when she teetered on her feet.

“It’s ok,” the man behind Merle said. “I’m Siddiq. I’m a doctor. I might be able to help.”

“Tara, get the truck,” Merle barked.

“Already on it,” she called over her shoulder, already half-way around the store.

“Girl’s quick on her feet,” Merle grinned. Andrea cried out in pain again, and Merle slung his rifle around so it hung at his back, and he pulled her up off the ground to carry in his arms. She gasped but held her arms around his neck. “Now, Blondie, I don’t make it a habit of sweeping beautiful women off their feet. They usually come to ‘ole Merle on their own.” He winked at her. “But I’m gonna make an exception for you.” Andrea was in too much pain to protest, and moments later, a big SUV came rumbling around the side of the building, screeching to a halt.

“You guys gonna stand around all day, or are we gonna get the hell outta here?” Tara called, leaning over to open the passenger side door.

Merle was already carrying Andrea toward the vehicle, and Daryl cast a worried glance at Carol.

“The others will wonder where we are,” she whispered. She looked at him. “I can’t leave Sophia.”

“I know. We’ll figure somethin’ out,” Daryl murmured. “Just stay close to me. We gotta get outta this alive, and we’ll figure out the rest.” Carol hesitated for a second, but she knew he was right. She wasn’t going to get back to Sophia dead. This was the only option. She nodded then, and she followed Daryl to the truck.

They climbed inside the back, while Merle helped Andrea into the front seat.

“Scoot on over toward the middle,” he urged her. She did as he asked, groaning in pain the whole way. Merle leaned over her, grinning while he buckled her seat belt.

“Can’t be too careful. Tara here drives like a bat outta hell.” Andrea winced in pain, and Merle pat her shoulder. “You look good, Blondie. Maybe after the doc takes a look at you, gives you a little somethin’ for the pain, me and you can play catch up.”

“Not a chance, Merle,” Andrea scoffed. Merle laughed and grinned over at Tara who rolled her eyes.

“Merle, get in the truck before I leave your ass on the side of the road,” Tara barked. Merle laughed and climbed in next to Andrea and turned to look at his brother in the back seat.

“Everybody in? Alright. Let’s get the hell outta here.”

Tara tore out of the lot like she was running from a fire, and as soon as they were out on the road, Merle reached into the glove compartment and pulled out a walkie. Carol and Daryl eyed each other in the back seat.

“Just gotta communicate with the home base. We been gone a few days. Gotta make sure there’s a home to go back to.”

“Let me do it,” Siddiq encouraged, reaching for the walkie.

“Easy there, Doc. Why you?” Siddiq grabbed for the walkie, and Merle jerked it away.

“Because you’re an asshole. They don’t like you.”

“They like me just fine,” Merle laughed. “Ain’t my fault if they don’t like to hear the truth sometimes. Boss likes me.”

“Boss is an asshole, too,” Siddiq pointed out. “And you can tell him I said that. Why? Because he likes me.” Merle laughed and handed the doctor the walkie.

“You grown yourself a pair since we first met. I like you, Deeky.”

“It’s Siddiq.”

“Whatever,” Merle snorted.

Suddenly, Carol reached for the door handle, and Daryl grabbed her arm before she could open it.

“You ok?” he whispered. She shook her head, her glassy eyes and pale face giving away her predicament.

“Pull over,” Daryl called out.

“What? Are you crazy? We’re in the middle of town,” Tara argued.

“Don’t care. Pull over. Now!” Tara hit the brakes, and Carol opened the door, leaned her head over and threw up.

“Christ,” Merle groaned. “You alright back there, Church Mouse?”

“Fuck off,” Daryl snapped. Merle grinned and turned a little in his seat.

“Can’t she speak for herself? I know she was awful quiet back at the quarry, but I figured that was ‘cause of that asshole she was ma—”

“Go to hell, Merle,” Carol spat, wiping at her mouth with the back of her hand. Merle wheezed when he laughed, and he looked to his brother.

“She ain’t a church mouse no more.” He noticed the way Carol’s hand was on Daryl’s arm, and he raised an eyebrow. “Seems like you taught her well. She ok? She gonna ruin the seats in my sweet, new ride?”

“Breakfast didn’t agree with me this morning,” Carol lied. “I’m fine.”

“You sure? Don’t like to see nobody feelin’ sick. Don’t like to see ‘em yack in front of me, neither?”

“I’m fine,” she bit out, glaring at him.

“Just leave her alone, Merle,” Daryl ordered.

“Well, lookie at you, throwin’ around orders like a big boy.” Merle reached over and clapped his brother on the leg.

“Would you be quiet already so I can call camp?” Siddiq asked with a huff. Merle held his hand and his metal arm up in surrender and turned back around in his seat. Siddiq cleared his throat and glanced nervously over at Daryl and then Carol.

“You go on ahead, Deeky.” Siddiq glared at Merle for a moment before he took a deep breath and focused his attention on the walkie in his hand.

“Group 2 to Base Camp.” He let go of the button and heard nothing but squealing and static. “Group 2 to Base Camp. Do you copy?” More static. He sighed. “Base Camp, this is Siddiq. Do you copy?”

“This is base camp. We copy,” a little girl’s voice came over the walkie. Siddiq chuckled and shook his head.

“Group 2, this is Base Camp. We copy.”

“Sasha, that you?” Siddiq asked.

“Siddiq?”

“Yeah.”

“Great. I’ll let the boss know, and…”

“Wait, Sasha. We have people. We’re coming back. We’re about an hour out from camp. We’ve got three. Two women and a man. One of them’s hurt pretty bad. One might be sick.”

“Sick? Infected?”

“No. No, nothing like that. Is Group 1 back yet?”

“Yeah, they go back in last night. We expected you guys back first. Everything ok?” Siddiq paused for a moment and cleared his throat.

“We lost Gareth.”

“What?!”

“It happened yesterday. We were trying to get through all night last night.”

“What…what happened?” Sasha asked.

“We got caught in a herd. He, uh, he got caught. There was nothing we could do.”

“Damn it,” she huffed out over the airwaves. “I’ll uh, I’ll go tell everybody.”

“Did group 1 do alright?”

“Yeah. They didn’t find much. They didn’t find anybody, either. Of course, it was just Rosita and Aaron, so what do we expect? Probably playing the license plate game.” There was a laugh in her voice, but Carol and Daryl looked at each other. Daryl’s gaze bore into hers, and he gave her a little nod. She knew he’d tell her later, when there weren’t other ears around.

 _“I heard that!”_ came a voice in the back. Siddiq laughed and shook his head.

“Hey, Rosita. We’re coming home. Make room. We’ve got company.”

*~*~*~*~*~*

It was near dark when they rolled up outside of a chain-link fence. When someone opened the gates and let them through, Carol felt like she was being let into a prison yard. There was barbed wire along the tops of the fences, and there was dim light emanating through some of the windows.

“Welcome to Terminus,” Merle boasted with a laugh.

“The hell is Terminus?”

“Well, it used to be a kind of sanctuary. Gareth and his family found it, started lettin’ people in. Then one person got bit and didn’t tell nobody, and…well, let’s just say, Gareth was in a whole mess of trouble when The Saviors found him.”

“Saviors?” Carol asked. “Who are they?”

“You’re lookin’ at ‘em,” Merle chuckled.

“Alright,” Tara spoke up. “We’re here.”

“Look, we have a camp we need to get back to,” Daryl pointed out. “They’re gonna wonder where we are.”

“Oh, so it ain’t just you three left? Well, is good ‘ole Ricky boy still around?” Daryl’s jaw tensed, and he looked at Carol again. “Alright. Well, don’t tell your brother. Hell, I don’t know what kinda ship your leader runs over there, but our boss is a pretty good guy. Saved my ass when he found me bleedin’ to death on that roof. Same roof Rick left me on.”

“C’mon, Merle. That’s the past.”

“Oh, I ain’t mad about it now more. Was, but that’s the past. Hell, I’m sittin’ pretty in the apocalypse. Now that I got my baby brother back, I ain’t got any problems.”

“We ain’t stayin’,” Daryl insisted.

“Who said you had to?” Merle asked. “Anyone hungry? Don’t know what kinda setup ya’ll got going on, but we’ve got food to last for days. It gets awful damn cold at night, but we ain’t goin’ hungry.”

Tara pulled up outside a set of double doors, and she offered Carol a smile.

“It’s not much, but it’s home. Maybe it’s not as good as what you’ve got, wherever that is, but it’s kept us alive since this shitshow started.”

“Thanks, Tara,” Carol said quietly.

“Don’t worry. The boss is kind of an asshole, but he’s a good guy. Saved my life when the rest of my family…” She looked down. “Anyway, he’s done right by me. And don’t worry about getting back to your people. We’ll get you back to them.”

“We gonna sit around talkin’ all night, or are we gonna go in?”

“Honestly, I’d rather stay in the car,” Tara muttered. “It’s warmer.”

“Gotta save gas, kiddo,” Merle pointed out. “C’mon.”

Siddiq and Merle helped Andrea out of the car, and a couple of people came out to hold the doors open. Carol and Daryl stayed together, eyeing their surroundings with each step.

“We can’t stay here,” Carol whispered.

“I know,” Daryl murmured. “We’ll get back to Sophia. I promise. I kept an eye on where we was goin’.”

They stepped through the doors and into a large room filled with curtained off areas that Carol supposed were supposed to be rooms. The smell of food in the air made her stomach turn. It didn’t smell terrible, but everything seemed to be setting her off today.

Siddiq and Merle brought Andrea over to the nearest cot and put her down. A young woman and a man with a cropped, dark beard came walking over. Daryl nudged Carol’s arm.

“Them’s the two that was outside the gates that night,” he whispered. “Thought it was when I heard their names in the car, but now I’m sure.”

“Rosita, can you get me something to make a splint?” Siddiq asked, kneeling by the cot to help Andrea get her boot off. Her ankle was black and blue and swollen, and she winced to look at it. Siddiq looked up at Carol and Daryl. “We’re running low on supplies. There’s a, uh, a hospital in Atlanta we’ve been trying to get to, but the city’s still so overrun.”

“So, you bring people here?”

“People that need help. People that need saving,” Aaron said with a little nod. “It started out just a couple of us, but now there’s eleven of us. Ten now, I guess.” He cleared his throat. “There used to be thirty of us or so.”

“What happened?” Daryl asked.

“What always happens?” Rosita countered, bringing back a couple of rulers and gauze. “People died.” She handed the supplies to Siddiq and folded her arms across her chest. “You guys look ok. You must be staying somewhere. Are there more of you?”

“Yeah, there’s more of us,” Daryl said with a nod.

“So, you guys just go around looking for supplies and people to save?” Carol asked, narrowing her eyes at them.

“Pretty much.” A young, black boy about Carl and Sophia’s age came walking over.

“And you call yourselves The Saviors?” she asked. Rosita snorted and rolled her eyes.

“ _He_ calls us that.” She nodded to Merle. “I think it sounds stupid. But we do try to help people when we can.”

“They helped us just two weeks ago,” the boy said. “Me and my dad. It was just us since my mom died.”

“Well, where’s your dad now, kid?” Daryl asked. The boy looked to Rosita who nodded.

“He died. Got bit. It’s just me now. I’m Duane.”

“I’m sorry, Duane,” Carol said softly.

“I think we’ve all lost somebody. I’m so sorry,” Andrea said quietly.

“Who’d you lose?” Duane asked, his big, brown eyes curious and pained.

“My sister,” Andrea sniffled.

“Sorry,” Duane said softly. “That sucks.” A loud pop filled the air, and Andrea let out a scream.

“Ow! Ow! Fuck! Ow! Oh my God!” Andrea let out another string of curses after Siddiq set her ankle while she was distracted by Duane.

“I’m sorry, Andrea. I had to set the ankle, and I’ve learned from experience that it hurts a lot less when you aren’t expecting it.”

“Says you!” she huffed out, wiping at the tears that streamed down her face. “Holy shit!”

“What’s all the racket?” The group turned at the booming voice as a tall, lanky man came out from behind one of the curtains. His dark hair was slicked back, and he walked with a swagger that would make a cowboy envious.

“Boss,” Siddiq said with a nod. “Meet Daryl and Carol. And Andrea, here, was making all that commotion. She’s got good reason. Nasty ankle break.”

“Shit. I _am_ sorry,” he groaned. “Will she lose the foot?”

“What?!” Andrea squealed. The man smirked, and Siddiq rolled his eyes.

“She’ll be fine.”

“Good. Hate for her to end up like ‘ole Merle, here, but we fixed his stump up pretty good, didn’t we?” He clapped Merle on the back.

“Sure did, boss.” The man shook his head and chuckled.

“These guys. Calling me boss. I try to get them to stop, but they just won’t. Guess they like having someone to look up to.”

“Hey, boss,” Tara said, holding her knuckles out. He held his fist up to hers for a bump, and she popped her chewing gum as she walked by.

“Who the hell are you, anyway?” Daryl asked. The man smirked and looked at Merle who shrugged.

“Uh, boss, this is my little brother Daryl.”

“Daryl. I’ve heard a lot of shit about you. Pretty sure none of it’s true though. This asshole loves to talk, and sometimes I don’t think he knows most of what’s coming out of his mouth.” Daryl snorted. The guy had a point. “Two Dixons. Wow. I’m not so sure we have enough room for the both of you here if your ego’s as big as his.” He held his hand out. “I’m Negan. Welcome to Terminus.”

_Author’s Note: I said yesterday on a Tumblr post that this story was intended to be just a quick porn without plot with Caryl canoodling in the CDC showers and a few more chapters after that. It turned into a full-blown story, and I am thankful to those of you who are still reading and leaving feedback. I appreciate each comment so very much, and I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I hope to hear from you! Thanks again!_


	33. Chapter 33

Thirty-Three

The eating area was set up was very much like a school cafeteria. Two long tables were set up with chairs on either side. Andrea sat on the end of one table with her leg propped up on a chair. Daryl and Carol sat on one side of the table, while Merle and Siddiq sat at the other. Negan sat opposite Andrea . At the next table was Rosita, Duane, Tara, Aaron and his boyfriend Jesus, and Sasha.

“Hope you’re hungry,” Negan said with a gleeful chuckle. Daryl stared down at the massive steak on his plate.

“This beef?” he asked.

“Yeah. The cow wandered into the field on the other side of the tracks. Three walkers were heading right for her. We did the humane thing, and then we took down the skin eating bastards before they could ruin our supper.”

“Do you have cows where you’re at?” Duane asked, glancing at Daryl.

“Uh, no,” Daryl said quietly.

“We did at the last place. Chickens and horses, too,” Carol said quietly, poking at the medium-rare steak on her plate. She groaned softly.

“You ok, Carol?”

“Yeah, just a case of food poisoning, I think,” she lied. Andrea furrowed her brows.

“That’s the second time you’ve said that, but I had what you had this morning,” Andrea noted, taking a hearty bite and sighing at the delicious taste.

“Well, maybe it’s just a bug,” she tried. “I’m fine. I just don’t have much of an appetite.” She looked to Daryl for help.

“Yeah, truth is, I ain’t been feelin’ the best neither. Ya know, it might be that juice from the grocery store. Maybe it turned sour or somethin’. I just had a little sip, but Carol had a big drink of it.”

“Yeah, that’s probably it,” Carol winced. She cleared her throat and pushed her plate away.

“Where’d you three come from?” Negan asked.

“Atlanta,” Daryl said quietly. “Where’d you come from?” Negan clicked his tongue and ran his hand over the nape of his neck.

“Wisconsin. My wife and I made it to Indiana before she got bit.”

“Sorry to hear that,” Andrea said softly.

“Yeah,” Negan murmured. “The truth is, I was pretty pissed off at the world. Not only was everybody dying and coming back trying to kill my ass, but now my wife was gone, and I had to figure out how to survive on my own. I grouped up with a few folks I met on the road, but by the time we made it to Georgia, they either dropped dead from starvation or they got picked off by those things out there. And I was in a bad way. Almost dead, you know? And then I meet this guy right here.” He nodded to Siddiq. “He took me in, gave me food and water. Hell, he even patched up a couple wounds I didn’t even remember getting. Saved my life. Then we started meeting others, and we started pulling them in, helping them. The place we were at, some old shelter, got overrun, and we had to move. That’s when we found Terminus. And Gareth—I think you heard of him—and his family had a nice little operation going on here until some asshole got bit and didn’t tell anybody. We found Gareth just in the nick of time. Set up our little operation here and didn’t look back.”

“Operation,” Andrea said quietly. “Funny thing to call helping people.”

“Well, it’s not all selfless. Folks do their part to help out. We had a garden up until the first frost. We were planning on another one until this winter came and bit us on the ass. We’re thinking of heading south.”

“What the hell is south besides Florida?”

“The beach. A wall of ocean at our backs?”

“Yeah, ‘til them things start washin’ up outta the sea,” Daryl pointed out.

“Yeah, maybe. But at least we’d be prepared.”

“How many at your camp?” Negan asked. Carol glanced at Daryl and then at Andrea.

“Why do you want to know?” Andrea asked.

“Just making conversation,” he said, holding his hands up. “Besides, it might not hurt to pool our resources, have some allies out there in this shitshow of a city.”

“Boss, my baby brother don’t trust easy,” Merle pointed out. “He’s the sweet one, but he’s a lot more stubborn than me, if you can imagine that.” Negan nodded.

“I respect that. It’s hard to trust these days. I’ve come across some real sons of bitches out there.”

“Well, it ain’t just that,” Merle smirked. “My baby brother don’t call the shots. They got a real prick of a leader over there with ‘em.”

“Shut up, Merle,” Daryl warned. Merle laughed.

“I’m just messin’ around, little brother. As I recall, Blue Eyes over there has herself a pretty little girl and a bastard of a husband. They still around?”

“Ed’s dead,” Carol said quietly, taking a sip from her water bottle.

“Then I reckon you want to get back to that girl of yours.” He looked at Negan. “I’d be willing to drive ‘em back to their camp, see if I can convince Ricky-boy to have a sit down with us and think about joining forces. He might be a prick, but he ain’t stupid. He might have some good ideas. ‘Course, he might also wanna come in here and take over everything we built, too.”

“Hey, the more the merrier,” Negan shrugged. “Can’t say I blame a man for wanting to take what’s there to be taken. But what good’s all that shit gonna do you when you die alone and have nobody to put a bullet in your noggin when death comes knocking?” Negan tapped his fingers against the wooden table top. He looked from Andrea to Carol and then to Daryl. “You’re welcome to stay as long as you like, but I understand needing to keep your family together. Look, you don’t know us. We don’t know you. All I know is that you, Daryl, are Merle’s brother. Now, I trust Merle, and if you’re good with him, you’re good with me. I’d be willing to drive you back home personally and meet the rest of your people.”

“Thanks all the same,” Daryl said slowly, “but we’ll get back home ourselves.” Negan narrowed his eyes at him.

“You’re careful,” he chuckled. “Smart. I like that.” He looked at Tara and Siddiq and then back at Merle. “I take it they had a car.”

“Yeah. Surrounded by a bunch of those freaks,” Tara muttered. Negan nodded.

“Alright. Merle, tomorrow, you take our new friends back to their vehicle. Send them back home to their people.”

“What’s the catch?” Carol asked slowly, eyeing the man.

“Excuse me?”

“You expect us to believe you’re just going to send us back home and not have us followed?” A big grin spread over Negan’s face.

“Smart and beautiful,” Negan sighed. He looked at her for a moment and then looked at Andrea and winked. He turned his attention back to Daryl. “I do _not_ know how you concentrate.” Daryl glared at him.

“Cut it out, boss,” Siddiq sighed. He looked at Daryl and shook his head. “Don’t mind him. He’s a dick, but he’s harmless.”

“Deeky, that hurts,” Negan scoffed. Siddiq rolled his eyes. Now Merle had _him_ saying it.

“Yeah, once you get past the asshole exterior, he’s a pretty cool guy,” Tara shrugged her shoulder. “Kind of like Merle, except Merle’s got a suit of armor over his asshole exterior.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” Merle grinned. Tara flipped him off, and a Rosita snorted from her seat. She shook her head and rolled her eyes like this back and forth banter was old hat.

“Look,” Negan sighed, taking a big bite of his juicy steak. “Whatever you folks decide, you’re not going to do yourselves any favors out in that cold tonight. You might as well stay in here where it’s, well, not windy. We’ve got a few space heaters. We can share the wealth tonight. And tomorrow, you can be on your way. We just ask that if you decide not to come back, you don’t tell your people about us.”

“Why?” Andrea asked, drawing out the word as she narrowed her eyes.

“Look,” Negan said quietly, his tone a bit more serious, his eyes staring right into hers, “it hasn’t always been good for us here. We’ve had a lot of shit go down. We’ve lost a lot of people. Too many.” He cleared his throat and glanced at Sasha. She put her fork down and wiped at her mouth with a towel. Tears welled in her eyes, and he nodded at him, giving him permission to share a little with their guests. “Sasha’s brother. We, uh, we were out at a little shit-splat town in the middle of god-knows-where, and we found a row of stores we could scavenge. We were in the middle of it when a group of guys roll up. They were just as surprised to see us as we were to see them. One thing led to another, and we ended up with an excessive exchange of gunfire that lost people on both sides. Tyreese wasn’t even there.” He cleared his throat. “Some of them got away, but I guess they followed us back. They tore in here in the middle of the night, shooting and ransacking the place. Tyreese was the first one to wake up.”

Sasha took a deep breath, and Carol looked over at the young woman. The pain was pouring out of her in waves. Carol could practically feel it. She brought her hand to her chest.

“I get not trusting easy,” Negan said quietly. “We probably have more reason not to trust folks than you do, but we keep trying. We have to. What’s the world worth if there aren’t people to live in it with?”

“Aw, hell, Boss. You’re gettin’ me all misty-eyed,” Merle snorted.

“Shut the hell up, Merle,” Tara sighed. She sniffled and shrugged her shoulders. “Yeah, people suck. They did before the world died, and they kinda suck more now. But we try to help if we can. If they turn out to be real assholes, they usually show their true colors in a few days.”

“What happens then?” Carol asked.

“We send them on their way,” Aaron said quietly. “We give them a couple days’ worth of food and water and tell them not to come back.”

“What if they do?” Daryl asked.

“Then we do what we have to,” Negan said grimly. “You can only help folks that want to be helped. So, if you don’t want our help, don’t come back. And we’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t give our current whereabouts away to anyone else.”

“Thought you folks were all about helping people,” Daryl countered. “But you don’t want nobody to find you?”

“There’s a difference between bringing someone in and _letting_ someone in,” Negan explained, rapping his knuckles against the countertop. “You have to have some control. Know what I mean?”

“So you only help who you think’s worth helping?” Carol asked.

“It’s not really like that,” Aaron spoke up. “When you’ve lost what we’ve lost…the ways we’ve lost…” He cleared his throat. “Would you be willing to set up a meeting with your people and ours?” He looked to Negan. “I mean, that seems fair.”

“What makes you think we’d want to join you, anyway?” Andrea asked. “Our setup’s fine the way it is.”

“Fine’s good,” Jesus agreed, speaking up as he gave Aaron’s hand a squeeze at the table. “But maybe if we all work together, we could have something bigger. Better. We could set up a meeting.”

“What? So ya’ll can decide if we’re good enough to join ya? Thanks, but no thanks. We’re doin’ just fine.”

“Daryl,” Merle urged.

“Nah. You can stay here, pick and choose the folks you wanna help if it makes you feel like a hero, but that ain’t me.” He pushed his plate away. “Thanks for the supper. I’m turnin’ in for the night.” He pushed his chair back from the table and stood up. He stared down Negan for a moment. Negan stared right back at him before nodding his head.

“Duane, you wanna show our friends where they can hunker down tonight?”

“Sure,” the boy said with a nod, wiping his mouth and putting his fork down by his now empty plate. “C’mon, I’ll show you.” Carol stood next to Daryl and looked at Andrea.

“I’ll sit up a little while longer,” she said with a tired smile. “I’m still a little hungry.”

“Here. You might as well eat mine,” Carol offered, putting her plate in front of Andrea. She leaned down to hug her and whispered against her ear. “Be careful.”

“I’ll be fine,” she promised. “Good night.”

*~*~*~*~*

“Negan’s really nice,” Duane said quietly, leading Carol and Daryl to a separate part of the building. He pushed through two swinging doors to reveal another set up of beds, mostly made and untouched. “I don’t know why he lies about his wife like that, but I guess it makes him feel better.”

“What do you mean?” Carol asked softly.

“I heard him talking to my dad one night. My dad was telling him about my mom and how she died. It took my dad a really long time to put her down. Well, Negan told my dad how it was his wife’s idea to help people. They made it all the way to Georgia, and they helped people. ‘Course, none of those people are still around. Nobody here knew her, ‘cause one night, they helped some folks they thought they could trust, and they ended up hurting his wife. Bad. Negan had to put her down like my dad had to put my mom down.” He stopped in front of a larger bed and lit the lantern on the nightstand. “He had it pretty rough, though. He made it to Atlanta somehow and would’ve died if Siddiq hadn’t found him and helped him. He says he doesn’t let his guard down anymore. He still wants to help people, because he thinks that’s what she’d want. But he said he won’t _ever_ let something like that happen again. I don’t think he tells people the real story about his wife, ‘cause he blames himself. Thinks he didn’t do enough to protect her. I know my dad blamed himself for my mom for a long time.” Carol and Daryl looked to each other, and Daryl cleared his throat.

“You like it here, kid?”

“Yeah. I really like it here. I wish there was some kids, though.” He looked to Carol. “You really have a kid?”

“Yeah. She’s about your age,” Carol smiled.

“Are there more kids?” Carol nodded. “I hope you change your mind. We won’t stay here forever. Maybe we could all stay where you are.” Duane shrugged. “Is your boss a nice guy?”

“Has his moments,” Daryl snorted, getting a nudge in the ribcage by Carol. He glanced at her to see the sly grin on her face. He cleared his throat. “Thanks, kid.”

“Well, good night.” He turned and pushed back through the double doors.

“Good night,” Carol called after him. She turned to Daryl when they were alone, and her smile faded. “What the hell is this place?”

“Don’t know, but I’m gonna try and get Merle alone, see if I can get any information out of him.”

“He seems pretty sure of this place.”

“Yeah, well, my brother ain’t never been the best judge of character. And that Negan asshole needs to tone it down about five notches.” He scoffed and sat down on the bed. Carol sighed and sat down beside him, letting her shoulders slump. The tension in her back eased a bit, and she groaned, placing her hand there. “You ok?”

“Yeah. Just a busy day,” she huffed. “I’m beat.”

“Me too. Ain’t gonna get a damn bit of sleep tonight.”

“We should try. Honestly, Daryl, I don’t know how I feel about this place, but I don’t get serial killer vibes from these people.”

“That’s the best you can come up with?” Daryl snorted. Carol laughed and shrugged one shoulder.

“Well, it’s a start.”

“Shane would have a field day with this guy.” It was Carol’s turn to snort, and she leaned against him. “Probably have a dick measuring contest by the time it’s all said and done.”

“Now _that_ I’d like to see,” she teased.

“Stahp.” Carol snorted at that, and she kissed his cheek.

“Let’s try to sleep,” she urged. “Tomorrow, we’ll get out of here and think about what we’re gonna tell Rick when we get there.” She rested her head against his shoulder. “What about Merle?”

“What about him?”

“It’s big news, him being here.”

“Yeah,” Daryl sighed. “Kinda thought I was seein’ a ghost for a minute when he showed up outside that store.” He shook his head. “I know my brother. Usually falls in with the wrong crowds, but I know what ya mean about these folks. I don’t get all bad vibes from ‘em. Still can’t be too careful. Tensions goin’ like they been back home, Rick and Shane are liable to do anything.”

“Lions protecting the den,” she murmured.

“More like jackasses,” Daryl muttered. Carol laughed, and she curled her fingers against his. “Don’t know what’s worse. Them brayin’ at each other all damn day or my brother and this Negan asshole.”

“Yeah, well, whatever we decide, all I know is I want to get home to Sophia.”

“We’ll get there. By nightfall tomorrow, you’ll see your girl again. I promise.”

_Author’s Note: If you’re still reading, please let me know. Thanks._


	34. Chapter 34

Thirty-Four

“They’re not back yet.” Sophia stared out the slats in the front gate, her pale cheeks flushed red from the cold.

“Sophia, they’ll be home soon, sweetie,” Lori urged, stepping up behind the girl and putting one hand on her shoulder. Her other hand gently pressed against the swell of her stomach where she felt a foot or a knee jabbing her there.

“They said they’d be home by dark. It’s morning. Something happened.” Sophia’s lower lip trembled, but she kept her back to Lori so she wouldn’t see.

“It _did_ snow a lot. I bet some of the roads were hard to travel on. They would’ve had to drive a lot slower. They might have ended up taking cover at a house somewhere. I bet they’ll be home really soon.”

“You think?” Sophia asked.

“Daryl, Andrea and your mom are all very capable of taking care of themselves and each other. They’ll be fine. I just know it.” Sophia sighed then and turned to look up at Lori.

“Daryl saved me. I know my mom will be safe with him.”

“And he’ll be safe with your mom,” Lori said with a grin, chucking Sophia on the chin. Sophia grinned. “You mom’s getting _very_ good at taking care of herself out there. I’m kind of jealous.”

“Why?” Sophia asked, cocking her head to the side.

“I could use the practice, but I’m a little bit slower these days.” She patted her belly. Sophia looked down at where Lori’s coat puffed out around her pregnant belly.

“How much longer?”

“Few months. Maybe four,” Lori said quietly.

“I think it’s a girl.”

“You do, huh?”

“Yeah. I would’ve liked to have a baby sister.” She looked back up at Lori’s face. “Do you think I could help with the baby sometime, Mrs. Grimes?”

“I’ll take _all_ the help I can get, honey,” Lori chuckled. “Thank you for offering.” She pulled her arm around Sophia’s shoulder. “Come on. Let’s go get warm. I’m _pretty_ sure Maggie found some hot chocolate in the kitchen. We better get some before Carl drinks it all.” Sophia giggled, and the two made their way back into the safety of the dorm to try to keep their minds off the fact that three members of their group weren’t back yet.

Lori could tell Sophia was scared and trying to be brave, and she knew how absolutely devastated she’d be to lose her mother. Lori couldn’t help but worry about her friend’s safety. She knew it they weren’t back by nightfall, they’d be sending out a search party, and the last thing anybody needed was for more of them to go out there with those dark snow clouds on the horizon. The roads were bad enough as it was, and there was sure to be another wave of bad weather to make traveling conditions worse.

Lori shivered when a snowflake fell before her, and she said a silent prayer they’d be home soon.

*~*~*~*~*

Daryl had barely slept a wink the night before. He’d been too worried about the strangers in the next room. Plus, there was the startling realization that Merle had been alive all this time, not bleeding to death and wandering around like the rest of the walkers out there in Atlanta. He realized that he’d pretty much given up on the idea of ever seeing Merle again, and a part of him had already buried him a long time ago.

When the sun first started to filter through the dirty windows high up on the walls in Terminus, Daryl put on his boots and kissed Carol’s cheek. She stirred in her sleep but didn’t wake, and he rubbed his hands together. He could see his own breath, and he knew she had to be cold. He tugged the blanket up around her shoulders, tucking it in around her gently enough that he wouldn’t disturb her. She sighed in her sleep, and he turned to leave the room.

He passed by closed curtains, and a few soft snores echoed off of the walls. He saw Merle by the doors with his coat on, tugging a hat on over his head.

“Merle,” he hissed out, trying to be quiet so he wouldn’t wake the rest of the group. “Merle!” Merle pushed through the doors and headed outside. Daryl bit back a curse and followed his brother until he was outside in the bright sunlight. A fresh coating of snow had fallen at some point in the night, and Sasha and Jesus were outside shoveling a path. For a second, it felt a bit like the old world again.

He caught sight of Merle leaned up against the side of the building with a cigarette hanging from his lips.

“Merle.” Merle glanced up to see his little brother walking over with his hands shoved deep in his pockets.

“Well, you’re up early,” Merle chuckled. “Used to be I couldn’t get your ass to wake up ‘til after noon.”

“Think you got that mixed up. I was usually pullin’ your ass off the bathroom floor and cleanin’ the barf off the floor.”

“Them was the days, weren’t they?” Merle clapped his brother on the shoulder as he joined him leaning against the wall. “Wasn’t much time for a reunion yesterday, what with all the excitement. It’s good to see you, brother.” Daryl nodded then, and Merle offered him a cigarette. He took it, accepted the lighter and inhaled deep on that first drag. He let it out slowly and leaned his head back against the building.

“Thought you might be dead. Told myself for the longest time you couldn’t be. But after a while, I had to believe it.”

“Yeah. I damn near was. You see what I had to do.” He held up his metal-covered stump.

“Yeah. We went back to Atlanta. Rick told us what happened. We went back. Me, him, T-Dog. Glenn.”

“They all still around?”

“Mmmhmm,” Daryl hummed, taking another pull on his cigarette. “Plus a few more you ain’t met.” Daryl eyed him. “You been with him all this time?”

“Yeah. Weren’t a lot of us back then. Really wasn’t all that long ago, but it seems like a lifetime ago.” Merle flicked his cigarette but into a pile of snow.

“You trust him?”

“With my life,” Merle nodded. “You trust me?” Daryl glanced at him and took another drag of his cigarette. Merle let out a laugh. “Yeah, well, what can I expect? You chose a bunch of strangers over your own flesh and blood.”

“That ain’t true,” Daryl spat. “We went back for you. Maybe if your ass hadn’t been poppin’ shots off the top of a fuckin’ building, ya’ll wouldn’t have been trapped in the first place.” His face reddened, and his hands shook. Merle shot around in front of him and got in his face, nose to nose, and then he laughed.

“I’m just fuckin’ with you, baby brother. God, I missed that. You gotta lighten’ the hell up, you know it?” Daryl scoffed and pushed Merle away. “Aw, I’m serious. If Rick Grimes came up to me right now, the first thing I’d do is…well, the first thing I’d do is punch him in the jaw. Next thing I’d do is shake his hand, ‘cause him leavin’ me chained up there was the best thing that coulda happened to me. I’m a hand short, but I sure have learned a lot the past six months or so.”

“Yeah. So have I.” Daryl took one last drag on his cigarette and tossed his into the same pile of snow.

“You grew up,” Merle said with a nod. “Hell, I grew up. I was a prick. I admit it. Still am, but bein’ here with these folks, some of the folks that’s been and gone, I learned a hell of a lot about myself that I ain’t proud of. I’m workin’ on it.” He cleared his throat. “So, my baby brother’s in love, huh?” Daryl narrowed his eyes at Merle. “Oh, hell, you don’t gotta tell me. It’s all in them moon eyes every time you look at the Church Mouse.”

“Don’t call her that,” he spat. “You don’t know her like that. She’d cut you down to your knees if you said that to her.”

“Oh, I’m sure she would,” Merle grinned. “She’s a fine lookin’ woman. Only shows what good it does a woman to get it from a _real_ man. ‘Course, if she was with me, she’d…”

“Don’t,” Daryl warned. “One thing ain’t changed. You’re still a fuckin’ pig.” Merle laughed and smacked his good hand on the side of the building.

“Speakin’ of pigs, what are you gonna tell ‘ole Ricky Boy about our little set up here?”

“Ain’t decided.”

“You don’t have to trust the boss. Hell, he’s basically just a figurehead anyway. But I’m your brother.”

“Yeah. I _know_ you. And ya wonder why I got my reservations.” Merle’s grin faded, and he nodded before ducking his head.

“We both went through it when we was kids. Think you had it a little worse than me. Shit, I was numbin’ myself with whatever the hell I could find before you ever saw your first pair of tits.” He spat on the ground. “I ain’t proud of who I was. Guess that’s why I kept an eye on you. Didn’t want you makin’ the same mistakes I did.” He eyed Daryl. “Look at you. You ain’t standin’ in nobody’s shadow no more. Not mine.” He narrowed his eyes at him. “Not even your faithful leader’s. Look at you. You ain’t a boy no more. You’re a man. Remind me to thank that Church—Carol. She made a man outta you.” Daryl’s face went red, and Merle clapped him on the shoulder. “It sure is good to see you, brother.”

“Glad you’re ok,” Daryl said quietly. “Glad you found your place.”

“It could be your place, too. I’m serious, Daryl. I’ve made some downright stupid calls in my life, but I’m right about this. You bring your group to us or we bring our group to you, whatever, and we can do anything.”

“You sound like a fuckin’ after school special,” Daryl snorted. Merle grinned.

“Hell, is it wrong to wanna see my brother? Just got you back. Don’t wanna lose you now.” He shoved his shoulder.

“I’ll talk to Rick,” Daryl agreed. “But…”

“Somethin’ tells me Officer Friendly don’t play sharesies when it comes to bein’ the head honcho.”

“Rick’s got a family to take care of. He’ll think about it.”

“You got a family to take care of too, am I right?” Daryl chewed his lip and nodded. “This place you’re set up in? Is it better than here?”

“Warmer. More room to spread out. ‘Course, you’ve got more room for buildin’ and plantin’. You got fences. We got walls. You got more options as far as scavengin’. We got more woods, more opportunity to hunt.” He eyed Merle for a moment. “You got a doctor. We got a vet.”

“Vet?”

“Yeah. He saved Sophia’s life. He does what he can, but there’s a baby.” He rubbed the back of his neck and avoided his brother’s eyes. “Uh, Rick’s wife. She’s pregnant.”

“Rick’s wife,” Merle said slowly. “I know her?”

“Uh, yeah. The woman with the kid. Remember Lori and Carl?”

“Christ almighty. Wasn’t she playing house with that asshole ex-cop?”

“It’s complicated,” Daryl muttered.

“Damn, it’s like them old soap operas mom used to watch,” Merle laughed. “Gotta say, I wouldn’t mind to watch all that shit play out in real time.” At Daryl’s eyeroll, he shrugged. “We’d be glad to have ya. All of ya. And yeah, even them assholes that left me on the roof. They might be assholes, but at least they ain’t dead.”

“Like I said,” Daryl said quietly. “I’ll talk to Rick.”

“Might wanna lead with that doctor bit. Hell, you wanna take Deeky with you?”

“You want me to sell Terminus to Rick using Siddiq?”

“Why not? He’s a nice guy, charming. Boss is kind of a dick, so I’d lead with the nice doctor.” Merle chuckled. “Might not wanna lead with me, neither, come to think of it.” Daryl snorted at that and shook his head. Merle had always been full of hot air. That’s one thing that hadn’t changed. But Daryl had to admit it sure was good to see his brother again.

*~*~*~*~*

Carol cursed under her breath when she fumbled with the aspirin bottle and it went clattering to the floor. The lid popped off of it, and her prenatal vitamins went scattering. With a groan, she got on her hands and knees and started picking the pills up and putting them back in the bottle. To her surprise, she looked up just as two feet clad in running shoes appeared outside of her curtain. A hand slipped down to pick up a stray pill, and Carol scrambled to her feet to pull the curtain back. She came face to face with Siddiq, and he offered her a kind smile.

“Drop something?”

“Uh, thanks,” she said, quickly taking the pill from him and popping it back in her bottle.

“I was just coming to check on you. How are you feeling this morning?”

“I’m fine. Um, ready to get back to my daughter,” she said softly. “Ready to sleep in my own bed.”

“Understandable,” Siddiq said with a nod. “No nausea?”

“Not right now,” she said quietly.

“Headaches?”

“Sometimes. Not as bad now.” Siddiq nodded.

“How far along are you?” Carol stared at him for a moment. She opened her mouth and promptly shut it. “I know a prenatal vitamin when I see it. I’m a doctor, remember?” Carol looked down for a moment at the aspirin bottle, and her shoulders slumped.

“I’m not sure,” she admitted.

“Do you want me to take a look?” Carol took a step back, and he held his hands up.

“I have an ultrasound machine. It’s kind of ancient, but it works. I haven’t had to use it yet, except once when Merle wanted to see what his gut looked like inside. He was pretty disappointed.” Carol couldn’t help the little laugh that fell from her lips. “I don’t think the boss would mind me using a little juice to take a look.”

“I don’t know,” she said quietly. “I, uh, I’m probably going to lose it.” Siddiq cocked his head a little.

“What makes you say that?”

“I had a miscarriage after my daughter was born. At five weeks. Then I lost two more. One at six weeks and the other was…” She cleared her throat. “The doctor told me I have a lot of scar tissues.” She shrugged one shoulder.

“You don’t want to get attached to this pregnancy,” Siddiq concluded with a little nod. She said nothing, just stared at the aspirin bottle in her hand. “You probably have a lot of questions.” Carol swallowed thickly and felt the burn of tears she didn’t dare shed in front of this stranger. “Hey.” She looked up at him. “Money does nothing for me in this economy. I’ll accept a couple of squirrels or a few bottles of water as payment.” A little grin pulled up at his lips, and Carol found herself chuckling. “I understand if you don’t want my help. I’m a stranger. I get it.”

“It’s not that. I just…” She cleared her throat and stuffed her aspirin bottle into her pocket. She sighed heavily and looked up at Siddiq. He nodded.

“Seeing it makes it real.” She nodded. “Ok. That’s ok. You don’t have to see it. But if it would make you feel better, I can take a look and see how far along you are. I can see how things look. It might give you some peace of mind. It might also confirm your fears. I can’t make any promises.” Carol took a shaky breath and furrowed her brows.

“You’d do that?” Siddiq nodded.

“I’m a doctor. It’s what I do. And I’ll tell you, all of these broken bones and nasty coughs I’ve been getting lately are really starting to bore me.” Carol laughed and that, and Siddiq grinned. “What do you say?” Carol took another deep breath before brushing a stubborn tear away. Finally, she nodded.

“Yeah. Ok. Let’s do it.”

_Author’s Note: Feedback is so very much appreciated. Thanks for reading!_


	35. Chapter 35

Thirty-Five

“Carol?” Daryl pushed through the door Siddiq had saw the curtain pulled around in the corner.

“In here,” she announced.

“What’s goin’ on?” He let the door swing shut behind him and pushed past the curtain to find Carol sitting in what looked like an old dentist’s chair. She was wringing her hands together and looked like she’d been crying. “You ok?”

“Yeah,” she sniffled. “I wanted you here for this.” Daryl noticed the machine by the chair, and he knew he’d seen one before but couldn’t quite place it. He figured it was something he’d seen on some TV show, but that wasn’t really important. He was more concerned about why Carol looked like she’d been crying.

“Somebody say something to you? Somebody do something?”

“No,” she murmured. “Nothing like that. Siddiq figured out that I’m pregnant.” Daryl wasn’t sure what to say. He knew it was something she didn’t want people to know about, because she was convinced the pregnancy was doomed from the get-go.

“Oh.” He stepped over toward the bed and watched her tremble with the deep breath she took. “So what’s goin’ on?”

“He’s doing to do an ultrasound. He can tell me about how far along I am. He can see if things look ok.” She shook her head. “I don’t know why I agreed to it. I almost told him to do it without you. It won’t help the whole…attachment thing. But this is _your_ baby, too. This is probably the only time you’ll ever get to see something like this, and even if I do lose it, at least we’ll both remember.” Her lower lip trembled, and Daryl took her hand. The back of his throat clenched and felt hot, and he swallowed hard around the lump there.

He still wasn’t quite sure how he’d gotten to this place in his life. He’d started the end of the world a man of few words, a hot head. He’d been the kind of man who knew how to use his fists more than his words. He still remembered the day Rick Grimes blew into camp and announced that he’d left Merle on the rooftop in Atlanta. If he was being honest, hearing some stranger deliver that kind of news sent him back to his childhood when a stranger sat him down on a porch step and told him his mother was dead. Merle had been all he had left in the world, and then some stranger had told him he’d left him handcuffed to a roof.

Now, here he was, holding onto the hand of the woman he loved more than he’d ever loved anything, and he was going to be a father. Maybe going to be a father. If Carol was right, that maybe would be an absolute. And he wasn’t sure what terrified him more: becoming a father in this terrifying new world or losing a child he made with the woman he couldn’t live without.

And on the other hand, what if she _did_ carry the baby to term? What if something happened later in the pregnancy? What if something happened to _her_? He was no expert, but he knew that childbirth was a hell of an ordeal for a woman even before things went to shit. And that scar tissue she mentioned? What if that caused complications? What if he lost _her_?

Suddenly, he felt warm, and his heart was thundering in his chest. But when he looked at her, she looked terrified, and he knew that she was worried enough for both of them. So, he swallowed back the panic that threatened to shake him to his core, and he gave her hand a squeeze.

“It’s gonna be alright. You and the baby are both gonna be fine. I know ya can’t let yourself think that, so I’ll think it for both of us.” Carol blinked back tears, and Daryl leaned in to press a kiss to her forehead. She sighed against the tender touch, and when he pulled back, he pressed a kiss to her lips. When the heard footsteps approaching, he straightened and gave her a little half smile that seemed to ease some of the tension in her anxious face.

The door swung open, and a moment later, Siddiq slipped behind the curtain and messed with a fuse box on the wall. Suddenly, the machine by Carol’s chair made a whirring noise, and the screen lit up.

“Alright. I think I’m ready,” Siddiq said with a little duck of his head. He moved over to the machine and grabbed the doppler and what looked like a ketchup bottle filled with clear gel. “You guys ready?” Carol flinched but nodded, and Daryl just ducked his head a little. “Alright, Carol, I’m really sorry, but this is gonna be cold. Like, _really_ cold.”

“That’s ok. I can take it,” she promised. She raised her shirt up and unfastened her jeans to shimmy them down enough for him to have access to her lower abdomen. Carol sucked in a sharp breath when he squeezed a dollop of gel on her tummy.

“You ok?” Daryl asked.

“Yeah,” she grunted, squeezing his hand. “He wasn’t lying. This stuff is freezing.” She remembered the doctor she’d gone to during her last pregnancy had their gel sitting on a warmer. She wasn’t going to complain about the cold, however, because she’d never thought in a million years she’d get to see _this_ baby on an ultrasound.

“Alright, it’ll just take me a few seconds.” He cleared his throat and started moving the doppler around. Daryl watched Carol’s stomach muscles jump, and then he watched the screen jump around with each of her reflexes. “Carol, you told me before I sent Daryl in that it’s been ‘a while’ since your last period.” Carol glanced up at Daryl and then back at Siddiq.

“I haven’t been…I mean, my periods aren’t as regular as they used to be. Not since my last pregnancy. Sometimes I’d go a few months without one. Stress, I think.”

“And this new world has its own share of stressors,” Siddiq said with a little nod. Then he nodded to the screen. “See that?” Daryl squinted at the black and bluish white swirls on the screen. Carol cleared her throat.

“I see it.” Siddiq tapped his finger on the screen for Daryl’s sake, but Daryl didn’t see much until Carol took a deep breath, and a dark spot appeared for a moment.

“Wait. Was that it?”

“Mmmhmm,” Siddiq murmured. He moved the doppler again, and that dark patch got a little bigger. Inside that dark patch was something almost bean shaped, and Daryl cocked his head to the side to try to make heads or tails out of it. “Carol? Do you see that?” He pointed to the screen where something pulsed in the swirls.

“Yeah,” she sniffled. Daryl looked down to see her eyes were brimming with tears. “I see.” Siddiq nodded and made a couple of adjustments on the machine, and a few moments later, a swishing sound came from the speakers.

“What’s that?” Daryl asked, eyeing the doctor carefully.

“Heartbeat,” Carol whispered.

“It’s so fast. Is it s’posed to be that fast?” Daryl asked. Siddiq chuckled, and he nodded his head. “It’s strong. It sounds good.” He put the doppler away and gave Carol a towel to wipe her belly with. When she put her shirt back down and sat up a little, Siddiq cleared his throat.

“Carol, I know you have a lot of concerns. That’s to be expected given your medical history and with the world being what it is.”

“Ya don’t have to talk like that, ya know,” Daryl said quietly. “Just talk to us.”

“Sorry,” Siddiq chuckled nervously. “It’s been a long time since I’ve had a pregnant patient. I guess I’m a little nervous and excited.” He shook his head. “Not nervous. I don’t mean…”

“It’s ok,” Carol said quietly. “Just tell us what you saw.”

“I saw…a healthy ten-week embryo,” Siddiq explained.

“Ten weeks?” Carol asked, swallowed hard. She looked down at her slender waist and then back at the doctor. “How can I be ten weeks? I’m not even…”

“You’re underweight which is understandable with everything going on. But my best prescription is for you to eat what you can when you can. Not in excess, of course. You don’t want to make yourself sick.” He cleared his throat and stood up. “Everything looks good, and honestly, Carol, the scar tissue your doctor talked about doesn’t appear to be affecting this pregnancy at all. Carol, the placement of the scar tissue, from what I can see from the ultrasound, isn’t affecting the growth of this baby at all. As long as you’re healthy and you take care of yourself, I don’t see why you _can’t_ carry this baby to term.”

Carol let out a sharp breath, like someone had knocked the wind out of her, and she sat up a little.

“You…you saw that just on that screen?” Daryl asked.

“It’s not perfect, and if we were at a hospital where I had access to better equipment, I might be able to see things a little better. But the baby looks ok for now.” He turned his gaze back on Carol. “I know you didn’t want me to give you hope. I’m not trying to give you that. What I’m trying to give you is honesty.” He looked to Daryl and then back to Carol. “And, pending an actual physical examination, the ultrasound alone shows me a healthy pregnancy.”

“Does…” Daryl cleared his throat, and he felt Carol and Siddiq’s eyes on him. He looked to her and then to the doctor. “The scar tissue…I mean, if things go ok, what’s that mean for her havin’ the baby? I mean…like the actual…”

“Oh,” Siddiq said with a nod. “It would be best to monitor with an ultrasound at least once a month, but the best that I can tell, the scar tissue shouldn’t affect the birth in any way. Now, what we want to watch out for is the placenta. Right now, everything looks ok. But bleeding is something to look out for. A little spotting isn’t much to worry about, but if it’s more than that and frequently, then there’s cause for alarm.” Carol flinched and nodded and swung her legs over the side of the chair before standing up.

“Thank you for everything,” Carol said quietly. Siddiq nodded.

“Of course. Uh, I’ll give you two some time. I know you’re anxious to get back to your group. Merle’s out getting the truck gassed up to drive you back to your car.” He turned to leave but stopped at the curtain. He turned back. “I hope your group will join ours. Or ours will join yours. Whatever happens, I’d like to help you. Obstetrics wasn’t my specialty, but I was _very_ good, if I do say so myself. And I’d like to meet this vet of yours. I’d be happy to work with him and teach him a few things that might be useful.”

“We’ll talk to Rick,” Carol agreed, looking to Daryl who nodded. “Thanks again.”

“Yeah. Thank, Doc.” Siddiq nodded and left them alone. Carol’s shoulders slumped, and she covered her face with her hands.

“Oh my God,” she murmured. Daryl nodded.

“You ok?”

“Yeah. I think so. I don’t know. I’m not even sure I should have let him do that.” Daryl pulled her in close and held her. She sighed and buried her face against his chest, letting the warmth coming from him soothe her. He kissed the top of her head and stroked the back of her neck.

“I know. But he seemed to know his stuff.”

“They always seem to know their stuff,” Carol huffed out. She sniffled and pulled back. “This was a mistake.”

“What?”

“We heard him say all of those things that sounded really good, and now we’re feeling like maybe this might really happy. And I don’t know if it’s a good thing. Bringing a baby into this? Is that even fair? And now I’m actually thinking that it might happen, all because…”

“Hey, whoa. Carol,” Daryl urged, tugging on her hand. “It’s ok to want this.”

“Is it?” she sniffled. “What kind of life can we give a kid?”

“Sophia and Carl are doin’ alright, ain’t they? And Duane.” He nodded toward the door.

“Sophia’s been shot. She almost died. She…”

“And she’s waitin’ back at home for us right now. She’s ok.”

“God,” Carol choked out. “You really want this, don’t you?”

“I want _you_.” Daryl swallowed hard, and the tops of his ears went red. “Havin’ a baby sounds like the scariest thing right now. Walkers ain’t got nothin’ on the responsibility of keepin’ a kid alive. But right now, that kid’s safe. We got time. We can figure somethin’ out.”

“You’re making plans,” she sniffled.

“Can’t live each day like tomorrow ain’t comin’.” Carol’s lower lip trembled, and she leaned in to press a soft kiss to his lips.

“But what happens tomorrow?” she asked.

“We get through it. Whatever happens.”

“Yeah,” she sniffled. “We get through it. We always do. We always will. Until we can’t.” She put her hand on his cheek, and she could see the worry in his eyes. “You’re scared.”

“’Course I’m scared. Scared of bein’ somebody’s daddy. Scared of what you’re gonna go through. Scared of…” His words caught in his throat, and Carol knew what he was thinking. “Can’t lose you.”

“I don’t plan on going anywhere,” she said with a sad smile. “But if anything does happen, will you take care of Sophia?”

“You’re gonna be ok.” His voice waivered, and Carol looked him in the eye.

“Daryl. You’d take care of her?” Daryl took a step back and squeezed her hand.

“You ain’t gotta ask. ‘Course I would. But you ain’t goin’ nowhere, so don’t go thinkin’ that way, alright?”

“Ok,” she sniffled. She wiped at her nose and offered him a weak smile. “What’ll we tell Rick?”

“We’ll tell him…everything. Whatever happens, we need a doctor. No disrespect to Hershel, but I’d rather have a doctor takin’ care of you.”

“And if Rick doesn’t like the idea of joining them?” Daryl shrugged one shoulder and linked his fingers with his.

“Rick’s gonna do what he thinks he has to do for his family. We’re gonna do what we have to for ours.” He kissed her knuckles. “C’mon. Sophia’s gonna be worried sick. Don’t wanna keep her waitin’.” Carol wiped one last tear from her eye and squeezed Daryl’s hand firmly. She wasn’t sure what was going to happen, and as much as she feared it, a seed of hope had been planted, and no amount of preparing for the worst was going to wash it away. But she was thankful she wasn’t alone. She just prayed when all was said and done, their little family would be ok.

_Author’s Note: Thanks again for reading! I always look forward to your comments!_


	36. Chapter 36

Thirty-Six

“I’m not going.” Carol turned on her heels to stare at Andrea. Andrea was sitting at the table while Tara and Jesus cleaned up the breakfast dishes. Daryl was off talking to Negan, Carol was keeping Andrea company, and Merle was pulling the truck around.

“Not going?” Carol asked. “What are you talking about?”

“Look, if we get caught in the middle of something, I’ll just slow you down.”

“We’re just going from here back to where we left the car. Then we’re going home. We’ll be fine, Andrea,” Carol insisted. “And we don’t know what’s gonna happen with Rick back home. We’re not just gonna leave you.”

“It’s fine,” Andrea insisted, peeking over her shoulder as Tara and Jesus carried the next load of dishes back to wash. She looked back at Carol. “I want to stay. It’ll give you a reason to come back. You know Rick. He doesn’t leave one of his own behind.”

“But you expect us to?” Carol asked.

“No, I expect you to let me make a choice for myself,” Andrea whispered. “I want to stay here, get to know them.” Carol straightened up.

“You want to spy?” Andrea gave her a little nod.

“I feel pretty good about this place. I feel like we can trust them. But we’ve been here a night. Let me stay, get to know them. Let my ankle heal up a little. And you talk to Rick.”

“S’goin’ on?” Daryl asked as he and Negan came walking over. Carol raised her eyebrows and mustered up a nervous smile.

“Andrea wants to stay. She thinks she’ll slow us down.”

“You won’t slow us down. We’re just goin’ back to the car.”

“That’s what I said,” Carol said quietly. She cleared her throat.

“I told Carol I’d like to stay.” She glanced at Negan. “If that’s ok with you.”

“You already know how I feel about that,” Negan shrugged. “Though, the way Daryl tells it, you’ve got better digs back at your own camp.”

“Depends on how you define better,” Andrea said with a wince, tensing as the pain in her foot throbbed.

“We don’t know how shit’s gonna go down with Rick. We wanna be able to check on ya, make sure things are good here,” Daryl pointed out.

“Hold up. I’ve got just the thing.” Negan held his hand up and headed over to a file cabinet along the wall. Carol and Daryl shared a glance and then turned their attention back to Negan. He fished into the back of the cabinet and came back with a walkie talkie radio. “This thing’s got a fifty-mile radius or some shit. It’s pretty powerful. We got another one here. You take this one, that way you can check in any time. Besides, you know we might move on if we find something better. This way you know if we make that move.” He extended the radio out toward Daryl, and he took it cautiously.

“You’re just givin’ it to us?”

“You’re trusting us to keep one of your people safe. We’re trusting you to get that back to us when the time comes. Oh, and it takes real batteries. None of that USB charging shit. You got batteries?”

“We got batteries,” Daryl said with a nod.

“Good. Then I won’t keep you,” Negan said with a nod. “Save travels, and hopefully we’ll see all of you again soon.” Negan clapped Daryl on the shoulder. He nodded to Carol and turned away to leave. Carol turned back to Andrea and took her hand.

“Are you sure about this?”

“I’m sure,” Andrea promised. The door banged open, and Carol jumped. She turned to see Merle standing there with a grin on his face.

“Car’s warmed up. Let’s get you two lovebirds back to your nest.” Carol sighed and shook her head before turning back to hug Andrea.

“Be safe,” she whispered.

“Promise,” Andrea murmured. “Radio me when you guys are home?”

“We will,” Daryl assured her. “You sure you won’t change your mind?”

“I’m sure. It’s not forever. Just until I’m on my own two feet again. Literally.” Carol pulled back from the hug, and Andrea gave her a smile. “Now, go on. Get back to your kid. Talk to Rick and tell him about this place. I know Shane will have a fit, but the group’s going to go with what Rick wants. You know they will.” Carol nodded.

“We’ll see you soon.”

“Soon,” Andrea smiled.

“Are ya’ll waitin’ for the end of the world or somethin’, ‘cause it’s here,” Merle called, knocking his metal stump on the steel door.

“Hold your horses, jackass,” Daryl grunted. He looked to Carol and nodded. “You ready?” She nodded.

“Yeah.” She waved to Andrea, and Andrea smiled back. “Bye, Andrea.”

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The old truck was still parked where they’d left it and didn’t look any worse for wear save for several bloody, smudged handprints on the windows. Merle parked halfway up the block to watch for any sign of the small herd that had come through. There were a couple walkers way up the street traveling the opposite direction, so the coast was pretty much clear.

“Looks safe enough,” Carol said quietly, looking out her window and then out the back.

“Yeah, I’ll drive ya’ll on up there.” He looked to his brother. “It sure was good to see you again, little brother.”

“Good to see you too,” Daryl said quietly. He cleared his throat and looked at his brother. “I know that’s your group now. Your home. But you’re family. You got a place with us, too.”

“You’re my family,” Merle said with a nod. “But so are they. I can’t leave ‘em. We been through a lot of shit together. Not the kinda shit me and you been through, but I can’t leave ‘em. Thing is, you done a lot better for yourself without me.” Daryl swallowed hard and looked down. “Don’t deny it. If he hadn’t chained me on that roof, who knows where you’d be? Still followin’ me? Still listenin’ to my bullshit? Nah, you’re better’n that.” Daryl cleared his throat, and he put his hand on the door.

“I’m gonna ask you one more time. It’s just us.” He looked to Carol and then back at Merle. “You really trust this Negan guy?” Unflinching, Negan nodded.

“With my life.” Daryl thought for a moment before nodding.

“Alright. All I need to know.” He looked back at Carol. “You ready?” She nodded.

“Careful out there,” Merle called as they climbed out of his truck. “Hey, Church Mouse.” Carol huffed out a breath and crinkled her nose. She looked at Merle, and he chuckled at the annoyance in her face. “Take care of my brother, will ya?”

“You don’t have to worry about that,” Carol promised. “Thanks, Merle.” She shut the door quietly, and Daryl cast one last look back at his brother. He patted his pocket for the radio Negan had given him and he nodded.

“Hear for you soon?” Merle asked.

“Soon,” Daryl agreed. “Watch out for Andrea.”

“My pleasure,” he chuckled with a wiggle of his eyebrows.

“You hurt her, I’ll beat your ass.”

“Noted,” Merle snorted. “Be careful.” Daryl nodded once more and shut the door. He met Carol around on the other side, and together, they rushed off toward the truck. Carol reached it first, climbing into the passenger’s side, while Daryl got behind the wheel. He flashed his lights at Merle, who flashed his own back and did a U-turn before heading back off toward Terminus. Carol caught her breath and leaned her head back against the seat while Daryl turned the key. The engine roared to life, and Daryl put the heat on full blast, shivering as cold air blew out until the engine warmed up.

“You think he’ll follow us?” Carol asked quietly.

“Don’t know. Kept lookin’ out the rear-view mirror on the way here, thinkin’ they might have sent somebody to trail us. Didn’t see nothin’ or nobody.”

“We have the upper hand here,” Carol pointed out. “We know how to find them. They don’t know how to find us.”

“They do. They just don’t know they do,” he pointed out, remembering the night Rosita and Aaron had showed up at the gates of Claypool. Carol nodded and groaned, putting her hand against her chest. “You ok?”

“Yeah. Yeah. Just feeling a little queasy. I’m fine,” she promised.

“You sure?”

“Yeah. I just want to get home.” Daryl nodded then and took a look out the mirrors before pulling out onto the road. Caro reached into the glove compartment and grabbed the radio they’d left behind. With a heavy sigh, she closed her eyes and leaned her head back against the rest again. “Rick. Rick, do you copy?” Static. Daryl turned the corner and clipped a walker stepping out into the road. Carol flinched, and she peered in the mirror seeing no trace of anyone following. “Rick, it’s Carol. Does any body copy?”

“Carol?” A familiar voice broke the static.

“Lori?”

“Yeah. Hold on.” Static again. “Ok. Are you guys ok?”

“We’re…we’re ok. We’re heading home. We got into a situation, but we’re heading home.”

“How close?”

“Fifteen minutes,” Carol assured her. “Is Sophia there?”

“Yeah. I’m going to get her now. She’s been so worried. Rick and T-Dog went out looking this morning, but they just came back through the gates.”

“Everybody’s ok?” Carol asked.

“Yeah, we’re good. Here’s Sophia.”

“Mom?!”

“Sophia,” Carol smiled. “Hi, honey.”

“Mom, are you ok?”

“We’re ok, baby. Are you ok?”

“I’m fine. What happened?”

“We just got into some trouble, but we’re ok now. We’re coming home.”

“Be careful!”

“We will be. We’re almost home, Sophia. I love you.”

“Love you, too.” Static sounded again, and then Lori spoke.

“What happened out there?”

“We were surrounded,” Carol said quietly. “We’ll explain everything when we get home.”

“Alright. We’ll be at the gate.” Carol put the walkie down and looked at Daryl.

“You ready?” Daryl asked, eyeing her when she pinched the bridge of her nose.

“Yeah,” she snorted, running her fingers through her hair. “Here goes nothing.”


	37. Chapter 37

Thirty-Seven

The first sip of hot chocolate went down slow and warmed Carol’s chest. Her fingertips tingled from the heat of the ceramic cup, but she hadn’t felt this warm in what felt like days. She sighed heavily and took another drink before lifting her gaze to meet the concerned faces of the rest of the group. She glanced at Daryl out of the corner of her eye. Sophia, who sat right next to her mother, gave her hand a squeeze.

“So Andrea stayed behind with a bunch of strangers on purpose?” Rick said slowly.

“Yeah,” Daryl offered with a nod.

“Because Merle says it’s ok?” Rick concluded.

“Merle vouched for ‘em, but that ain’t why she stayed,” Daryl corrected. “Look, I know my brother. I wasn’t there for what went down on that rooftop, but I’ve known him my whole life. He’s still an asshole, but he’s not gonna hurt nobody.”

“So, we’re just supposed to take his brother’s word for it, then?” Shane asked with a disbelieving chuckle.

“No, you’re supposed to take _Daryl’s_ word for it,” Carol snapped. Shane’s eyebrows shot up, and he folded his arms across his chest.

“You mentioned Rosita and Aaron. They know where we live. They’re the ones that were here that night, right?” Rick asked.

“They didn’t see us. They don’t know we live here.”

“That you know of,” Rick pointed out.

“So these people just showed up and brought you home with them?” Maggie asked. “Doesn’t it seem a little suspicious that they just showed up right in the nick of time to help you? Doesn’t it seem like maybe they were watching you?”

“I don’t know,” Carol said with a shrug. “All I know is Andrea broke her ankle, and we were surrounded. If it wasn’t for Merle, Tara and Siddiq, we might not have made it out at all.” Everyone looked to Daryl for clarification, and Carol’s jaw clenched.

“She’s right,” Daryl pointed out. He turned his attention to Rick. “They didn’t have to help, but they did. Hell, _you_ didn’t have to help folks back in Atlanta, but you did. _They_ didn’t have to let you into the group, but they did.” Daryl motioned toward Shane and T-Dog. “Helped that you had a family there, otherwise you might’ve been out on your ass.”

“That’s not the same thing,” Shane started.

“Maybe it ain’t.” Daryl sat up a little in his chair, shoulders squaring. “They’ve got a doctor.”

“We’ve got a doctor,” Rick pointed out, nodding to Hershel. Lori’s mouth fell open, and she stared at her husband incredulously for a moment. Still, she said nothing.

“All due respect to Hershel, but I doubt he’s ever delivered a baby before,” Daryl said quietly.

“At least not a human one,” T-Dog muttered.

“You’re right. I haven’t. And a doctor would be a good asset to have right about now.” Hershel looked to Lori. “It’d be good to have someone here if things went wrong.”

“Nothing’s gonna go wrong. Why’d you say somethin’ like that?” Shane asked, glaring at the older man.

“He’s right,” Lori spoke up. “I had a C-Section with Carl. I might need one with this baby. And I lose sleep at night thinking about what might happen if…” She swallowed hard. “It’d be nice to have a doctor here. Just in case.”

“What kinda supplies do they have? Weapons? Ammo?” Shane asked. He glanced at Lori, getting a cutting look from her for his change of topic.

“Didn’t get a good look,” Daryl admitted. “But they have weapons. They have food. Look, they live in an old train terminal. A stock yard, really. It’s surrounded by fences, but they ain’t walls like ours. They got room to spread out, but they ain’t got much of nothin’.”

“Is there room for planting? For building?” Hershel wondered.

“Yeah, there’s plenty of room,” Carol said slowly. “But we’re more secure here. We have sturdy buildings. Walkers aren’t going to get through brick.”

“They’re not likely to get through fences either, at least not unless one of them comes down,” Shane said quietly. “And Daryl, you said the folks that came here that night were scoping out new places, right?”

“They’re talking about going south. Some place warmer along the coast so the ocean’s at their back,” Carol spoke up. “They helped us, but they need help, too. Things aren’t ideal for them there, otherwise they’d be making plans to make things permanent where they are.”

“How many people do they have?” Rick asked, scooting his chair back from the table a bit.

“Nine,” Daryl said warily.

“We outnumber them,” Shane pointed out, glancing at Rick. “Things came to blows, we have the upper hand.”

“No!” Daryl barked. “We didn’t tell ya’ll this so you could plan some takeover. We told ya’ll, ‘cause these folks need us as much as we need them. They got a doctor, we got secure walls. We all got know-how when it comes to scavenging and taking down walkers. We joins up, train each other, we’d have a good thing goin’.”

“You want to move them here?” Maggie asked. “I don’t know how I feel about that.”

“We didn’t know how we felt about taking _them_ in either,” Hershel pointed out, gesturing to Rick and the rest of the Atlanta group. “But we did.”

“Not everybody’s gonna be good like that, Daddy,” Maggie argued. “And, no offense Daryl, but your brother sounds like bad news. And if _he_ likes their leader…I don’t feel good about this at all.”

“Where is this place, anyway?” Shane asked. Daryl looked to Carol, and she tensed beside him. He cleared his throat and rubbed his hand on the back of his neck.

“We can set up some kind of meeting between our people. They don’t know where we are—”

“That you know of,” Rick interjected. “But we know where they are. You’d remember how to get there?” Daryl nodded. “Will you show me?” Daryl looked to Carol and then to Rick before clearing his throat.

“My brother’s there. I ain’t takin’ nobody nowhere unless I get a promise that nobody’s gonna get hurt. We don’t know these people. They don’t know us. They’re just tryin’ to survive like we are,” Daryl insisted. “They got a kid there. They got good people there.”

“If they’ve got weapons and supplies that we need, we could trade with them,” Glenn offered quietly.

“What do we have that they need besides walls?”

“Does it have to be about tradin’?” Daryl asked. “They’re open to a meeting. They’re open to joining us or us joining them.”

“I’m sure they are,” Shane huffed. “Sounds like the only thing they _really_ got goin’ for ‘em is a doctor and maybe some extra weapons. Those ain’t gonna last forever.”

“Stop it,” Lori warned. “Just because you don’t like it doesn’t mean it won’t be good for the group. We don’t know who these people are, but they’re people. It can’t just be _us_ anymore.” Lori’s hand ghosted over the swell of her belly. Rick swallowed hard and rubbed the back of his neck before looking to Shane. “Oh come on. Don’t do that.” Rick’s attention snapped back to her. “You’re gonna look to _him_ for your decision? Just a few days ago, you two couldn’t wait to throw punches at each other. Now you’re going to bond over _this_? Last I checked, _I’m_ the one having the baby. And _I_ would feel better having a doctor. Are you even going to consider that just a little bit?”

“Lori, it’s not good for the baby to get all worked up, alright?” Shane said quietly, holding his hand up.

“Oh, please. Don’t. Just…don’t.” She shook her head and pushed her chair back from the table and stood up. Hershel stood, too, looking from Carol and Daryl to Rick and Shane.

“We should take the day. Consider our options,” Hershel said evenly. “Tomorrow morning, we can vote on it.” He eyed Rick who still didn’t look convinced, and then he looked to Lori who looked to Carol.

“If you two are willing to consider merging groups, that’s good enough for me,” Lori stated. “I’ll take the word of someone who’s met them over somebody who’s afraid to make a damned decision.” She turned on her heel then and walked off. Carol stood next and leaned over on the table. She looked at Rick and Shane, and she took a deep breath.

“Andrea’s there. She’s fine. She’ll come back to us when her ankle’s better. They let us go and didn’t follow us. They could have followed us if they wanted. The ball’s in our court here. We’ve got the power here.” She eyed Rick. “Sounds like that’s what all of this back and forth is about. Power. Maybe instead of focusing on that, we should focus on what’s more important. Surviving.” She straightened then but kept her eyes on Rick.

“How do we know they didn’t do somethin’ with Andrea the minute you all left?” Maggie asked warily. Daryl sighed and reached into his pocket, pulling out the radio Negan had given him.

“Andrea, you there?” he asked into it. Rick and Shane looked at each other as the hiss of static crackled through the room. “Andrea, it’s Daryl. You copy?”

“Yeah, I’m here. Everything ok?”

“Yeah, we’re home. You good?”

“I’m good,” she promised. “Tell everyone hi for me?”

“You just told ‘em. Take care, Andrea. Check in in a couple days?”

“Copy.” Daryl put the radio away and leaned back in his chair.

“Alright?” He asked. Rick nodded.

“Alright. We’ll vote tomorrow.”

_Author’s Note: Please let me know your thoughts. Thanks!_


	38. Chapter 38

Thirty-Eight

It was cold. The windows were frosted over, and Carol was reminded of a time one cold winter when Ed was too cheap to pay the electric bill. She remembered puttering around the house in three layers of clothes and wrapping Sophia up in an extra blanket. She could still remember waking up in the morning and seeing her breath and wondering how she’d survived the night.

She was a little warmer on this night, however, because Daryl was spooned up behind her with his arms curled around her waist. One of his hands was splayed out under her shirt against the warm skin of her belly. His warm breath against the back of her neck also kept her from shivering from cold.

She knew he wasn’t asleep. She could tell by his breathing and the soft sighs that escaped his lips from time to time. He was restless, but he was trying not to disturb her. She sighed heavily and turned in the bed. Daryl groaned softly and stretched before enveloping Carol in his arms and pulling her close.

“You ok?”

“Can’t sleep,” she admitted.

“Me neither.” He slid his hand up and down her back, and she tucked her hands under his shirt to warm them against his back. He groaned softly, and Carol nuzzled her nose against his neck.

“What do you think’s gonna happen tomorrow?”

“It’s gonna be a shitshow,” he snorted. Carol sighed and kissed his neck before resting her head against his neck.

“Yeah, you’re probably right.”

“Rick and Shane are worried about the wrong things.”

“I think Hershel will vote with us. Lori, too,” Carol said quietly. “Maybe if I tell everybody I’m pregnant, too, they’ll vote with us.”

“Ya don’t have to do that,” Daryl said quietly.

“I know. It’s just a thought.” She cleared her throat. “They’ll find out eventually.” Daryl didn’t dare remind her that she spoke with a bit of hope in her heart. They were both quiet for the longest time, and finally, Carol took a deep breath. “We saw our baby today.”

“We did,” Daryl murmured, resuming the slow patterns he was tracing on her back with his palm.

“What’d you think?”

“Didn’t know what to think. Just ain’t never seen anything like it before.”

“Ten weeks,” she whispered. “Almost out of the first trimester.”

“That’s good?”

“It’s not a guarantee,” she admitted. “But it’s not bad, either.” Carol let out a heavy breath. “I have a bad feeling.”

“About what?”

“I don’t know. I just feel like something’s going to go wrong. Things have been tense for a while.” Daryl kissed the top of Carol’s head, and she sighed. “We could just run away. You, me, Sophia. Just take off and find a place of our own. Head west maybe.”

“West? What’s West?” Daryl murmured sleepily, stroking the back of Carol’s neck with his calloused fingertips.

“Don’t know,” she yawned. “I always wanted to find out.”

“West. Like California?”

“Maybe. Maybe not that far. Arizona. New Mexico, even.”

“Just live out in the desert eatin’ scorpions or whatever the hell they got out there?”

“Heck yeah,” she chuckled. “It could be fun. Just start a whole new life.” She tugged at the neck of Daryl’s shirt.

“Maybe we can all do that. Who knows how the vote’s gonna happen,” Daryl offered.

“We’ll see.”

“Rick’ll go along with whatever the group votes for.”

“Yeah,” Carol said slowly. “But will Shane?” Daryl said nothing then, only pulled Carol a little closer and a little tighter. She snuggled up against him and let the rhythm of his heart against her cheek lull her closer to sleep. For now, at least, she felt safe. But tomorrow made no promises.


	39. Chapter 39

Thirty-Nine

_Author’s Note: Trigger warning for graphic pregnancy loss._

Carol paced back and forth in front of Sophia’s bunk. Sophia sat with her elbows propped on her lap and her head in her hands. Her mother had knocked precisely four minutes ago and had done nothing but pace since she’d come in the room.

“Mom? Are you sick? Did you get bit?” Sophia asked quietly after a moment, her curious eyes taking in every anxious step her mother took. Carol stopped and looked at her daughter.

“No. No, it’s nothing like that.” Carol cleared her throat, and she moved to sit down next to her daughter on the bunk. “Sophia, I wanted to talk to you about something. We’re, uh, we’re having that meeting this morning about the other group, and I wanted you to know something before I tell the rest of the group. I haven’t decided if I’m telling the rest of the group, but I think you should know first.” She wrung her hands together, and Sophia turned to face her mom. “I’ve been afraid to say anything or think about it, but whatever happens, it’s happening right now, and…”

“Mom, you don’t make any sense,” Sophia said slowly. “What’s going on?”

“Well, it turns out that, uh...” She took a deep breath. “Well, I have some…some news.”

“Good news?”

“I hope so. I think so.” She blew out a fast breath and shook her head. “I’m having a baby.” Sophia’s eyes went wide.

“What? You…you are?” Carol nodded. “When?”

“Maybe six months,” Carol said slowly.

“I…I thought you couldn’t have another baby,” Sophia said slowly. “I heard you and Dad talking about it one time.”

“The doctor said a lot of things, but it turns out that I _can._ ” She cringed. “I can get pregnant, I just…don’t know what happens next. I didn’t want to say anything unless something happened.”

“Oh,” Sophia said slowly, nodding.

“I know we…we talked a little about the…the birds and the bees. I just want you to know if you have any questions…you can _always_ talk to me.”

“I don’t have any questions. I know how it happened,” Sophia blushed. “But…” She chewed her nails for a moment.

“What is it, Sophia?”

“It’s…Dad didn’t…I mean, he’s not…”

“No. No,” Carol said quietly. “This happened after.”

“Oh,” Sophia said slowly. Then her eyes went wide. “ _Oh_!” Carol cringed again. “So…you and Daryl are having a baby?” Carol saw the wheels turning in Sophia’s head. It would’ve been easier if Sophia was five and she could just say there was a baby in mommy’s belly. But Sophia knew about the birds and the bees. She knew what things were called, and in the back of Carol’s mind, she’d wanted her to know those things so she’d know that those were grown up things and if anybody ever tried to do those things with her, it was not ok and she needed to tell.

“Well…yes,” Carol said slowly. “Are you…ok with that?” Sophia nodded. “Good. Because I’ll need your help. You’re the big sister, after all.” Sophia smiled.

“Cool,” she grinned. Sophia’s brows furrowed together for a moment, and she looked at her mom. “I remember…you were in the hospital once. I was younger.” Carol’s lower lip trembled, and she nodded. “You were pregnant then, weren’t you? I remember your stomach got big.”

“Yeah,” Carol sniffled.

“Then you came home, and your stomach wasn’t so big, and I remember wondering why, but you looked sad.” Carol nodded. “Was it because of Dad?” Carol let out a choked gasp, and she covered her mouth with her hand. She nodded. “Do you know if you’re having a boy or a girl?”

“No,” Carol sniffled, smiling through her tears. She was happy Sophia had changed the direction of the conversation.

“I think it’s a boy.”

“You do?” Carol asked with a chuckle, pulling her arm around her daughter’s shoulders.

“Yeah. It’d be neat to have a little brother.”

“Well, I’ll do my best,” Carol chuckled. Sophia grinned, and she hugged her mom.

“Do you think someday we could all live in a big house with a dog and a big, back yard? You, me, Daryl and the baby? Like a real family?” Carol pulled back and brushed her daughter’s hair behind her ears.

“We _are_ a real family,” Carol whispered. “But the house and all that? Maybe someday. I hope so.” A frantic knock startled them both before the door swung open, and Carl stepped in. His face was pale, and his eyes were filled with tears.

“Hershel needs you,” he sniffled. “It’s mom.” Carol’s heart sank. She and Sophia both stood, and Carol reached out to put a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “Stay with Sophia.”

“But—”

“Carl,” Carol insisted sternly. “Stay here.” Carl looked to Sophia, and the girl nodded at him with pleading eyes. He sniffled and wiped his nose with his shirt sleeve before nodding. Carol shut the door behind her when she left, and she hurried across the hall to Lori and Rick’s room. She stepped in to find Hershel sitting next to a pained Lori. Lori was curled up on her side with her hands on her stomach, and Carol could smell blood in the air. She winced when she looked over Hershel’s shoulder to see the pool of blood in the middle of the bed. Her hand flew to her chest.

“Carol?” Hershel called without looking up from where he sat. “Come hold Lori’s hand.” Lori let out a wail, and Carol’s eyes brimmed with tears.

“Does…Does Rick know? Shane?”

“They’re out at the gates with Daryl. A small herd built up over night. I can’t stop the bleeding, and her water broke.” The reality hit Carol hard. She knew what it meant. It sent her right back to that day in the hospital when she’d lost her baby boy. She knew it was inevitable now, and the pain of the past was ever present. But she had to focus for the sake of her friend.

“No,” Lori choked out, face scrunching up with renewed pain. “No! My baby. Not my baby!”

“Now,” Hershel said calmly, reaching to touch Lori’s shoulder. “I sent Glenn out to pull Daryl from the gates with an excuse. We’re going to have him call Andrea and see if she can arrange for that doctor to get here. Would Daryl know how to get back to their camp on his own?” Carol nodded quickly and sniffled.

“Yeah. Yeah, I think so.”

“How long would it take?”

“An hour. Maybe a little less,” Carol murmured. Just then, Glenn and Daryl came walking up. The worry in Daryl’s face eased a little when he saw Carol wasn’t the one in need. Carol reached out for his hand, and Daryl looked over to see Lori on the bed. “We need Siddiq, Daryl.”

“I’ll go now. I’ll walkie Andrea; have Merle meet me halfway with the doc.”

“You need to hurry,” Hershel urged.

“Rick,” Lori choked out. “Get Rick. Please.” Carol squeezed Daryl’s hand, and she nodded at him.

“Go on. Be careful, and send Rick in.” Daryl nodded solemnly, and he leaned in to kiss Carol’s cheek.

“I’ll be back soon.”

“I know,” she whispered. “Go on.” Daryl took off down the hall, and Glenn turned his gaze to Hershel.

“Is there anything I can do?” he asked, swallowing back the lump in his throat. Hershel shook his head.

“I’m afraid not, son. Not this time.” Glenn looked down, and Carol touched his shoulder.

“Go out and wait for Rick. I’ll stay with them,” she promised. Glenn nodded and turned to leave the room. Carol shut the door, and just as she turned back, Lori cried out in pain again.

“What…what can I do?” Carol asked. “Blood. D—Daryl can give blood. I can take his place and…”

“We don’t have the supplies, I’m afraid,” Hershel murmured. “Let’s just keep her still and pray Daryl gets the doctor here on time. I’ll do what I can.” He turned his attention back to Lori, and Carol gently sat down on the side of the bed, taking her friend’s hand.

“If—if somethin’ happens to me, promise me you’ll look after Carl,” Lori choked out.

“Don’t talk like that. You’re gonna be fine.”

“Don’t bullshit me,” Lori choked out. “You’re a mother. You’d want the same for Sophia. Just…promise me.” Carol swallowed hard and looked down. She gave Lori’s hand a squeeze and nodded.

“I promise,” she whispered. “But you’re gonna be fine. Just lay still. Daryl will back with the doctor soon. Everything’s gonna be ok.” Tears rolled back toward Lori’s ears as she lay her head back against her pillow. She cried out as another pain hit her, and she squeezed Carol’s hand hard.

“You hold on,” Carol urged. “You squeeze my hand as hard as you need to, ok? I’m not gonna break. You just hold onto me, ok?”

“Ok,” Lori choked out. “Ok.” She sniffled, and Carol leaned down to press a kiss against her forehead.

“Close your eyes and breathe,” Carol urged. “I’m right here. You’re gonna be ok.”


	40. Chapter 40

Forty

The halls were still and silent. Most everyone had gathered in the cafeteria to wait for news. Sophia had been keeping Carl busy with a card game until Daryl had arrived with Siddiq. There had been no time for introductions, and while Carl had wanted to go to his mother, Shane had pulled him back and told him that the best thing he could do for his mom was to stay out of the way and say a prayer.

Daryl was pacing the hallway. He’d been there for a solid hour, and about five minutes ago, Rick had called Shane into the room. Daryl had barely gotten a glimpse of Carol before the door shut. She’d met his gaze, and he’d seen the tears in her eyes. She’d given him a sad smile and a little nod, and he knew she was hurting. He hated being on the outside while she was in there with everything going on. It made him anxious, and all he wanted to do was go to her and hold her and tell her this wasn’t going to happen to them. He couldn’t promise it, but he could sure as hell try and give her some little bit of hope. So, he’d started pacing. He hadn’t really realized he was doing it until he heard a soft voice behind him.

“Are you scared?” He turned on his heel to see Sophia standing there with her hands stuffed in her pockets. She took a step toward him, barely limping now, he noticed. She had grown at least four inches in height since the day he’d carried her all the way to Hershel’s doorstep.

“Just worried,” Daryl admitted.

“Mom’s with Lori,” Sophia offered, watching Daryl lean against the wall. “And Hershel and the doctor.”

“Yeah,” Daryl said quietly. Sophia crossed her arms and leaned back against the wall facing Daryl.

“You’re worrying about my mom, aren’t you? About the baby?” Daryl stared at her for a moment before nodding.

“You know?”

“She told me this morning.”

“Yeah,” he said quiet. “Pretty sure your mama’s worried enough for all of us. But yeah, I’m worried.” Sophia nodded and looked down.

“Me too.”

“Hey.” Daryl waited until she dragged her gaze up to meet his. “Your mama’s gonna be just fine. Alright? You ain’t gotta worry about that, ok? Ain’t no use in worryin’ ‘til there’s somethin’ to worry about.” He paused a moment and cleared his throat. “You tell anybody yet?”

“No.”

“Best keep it quiet ‘til things settle down. What with everything goin’ on, it might be bad timin’.” Sophia nodded.

“I won’t say anything,” she promised. The door opened again, and Shane stepped out, pressing the heels of his hands against his eyes. He let out a mournful groan, and Rick stepped out behind him. Shane sniffled and shook his head, running his fingers through his hair. Rick looked down, hands stuffed in his pockets, toe of his boot scuffing the stained carpet.

Shane left the hall looking like all of the air had been let out of him. His head hung low, his shoulders slumped, and he walked like a man twice his age, like every step was a struggle and a pain.

Sophia moved to the opposite wall, leaning on it next to Daryl as Rick passed by.

“How’s she doin’?” Daryl asked, his voice thick and rough like he hadn’t spoken for a week.

“Uh, she’s…uh, she’s gonna be ok. The doctor’s good. He, uh, he saved her life.” Daryl nodded then, and he took hold of Rick’s arm. Rick looked down and took a shaking breath.

“She’s gonna be ok,” Daryl reminded him.

“Yeah.” Rick cleared his throat and pinched the bridge of his nose as tears welled in his eyes. “It, uh…it was a boy.”

“M’sorry,” Daryl said quietly. Rick nodded, and Daryl let go of his arm. Rick walked off, and Daryl back against the wall. Sophia looked up at him with those big, sad eyes, and he could feel her staring at him. He looked back down at her, and he reached over to put an arm around her shoulders. “Don’t worry. Everything’s gonna be alright.”

*~*~*~*~*~*

Carol stayed by Lori’s side long after Hershel and Siddiq had left the room. Hershel had cradled the white towel in his arms on his way out, and they’d taken it off somewhere to prepare for a burial. Lori was still. The bleeding had stopped, and so had the crying once Siddiq gave her a sedative. She was lying on the bed, staring up at the ceiling, and her tears were dry. Still, her lower lip trembled, and a whimper escaped her lips now and then. Carol just sat there holding her hand, wiping her forehead with a damp rag once in a while.

She remembered lying in the hospital after she’d lost her son. She remembered feeling so numb and empty after the tears had dried up only to wake the next morning, tears renewed and uncontrollable. It still hurt to think about, and now Lori was experiencing that same pain.

It was more than a couple of hours before Lori started to move around. Carol leaned forward in her chair and squeezed Lori’s hand.

“It’s ok. You’re ok,” she said softly. Lori blinked up at her for a moment, her hand moving to the swell of her stomach before her face paled and the pain etched into her features.

“Where is he?” she whimpered. “Where’s my baby boy?”

“Hershel and Siddiq took him away. It’s ok,” Carol whispered. “They’ll take care of him.” Lori squeezed her eyes shut and she shook her head.

“I’m being punished,” she whispered. “I did this.”

“You didn’t,” Carol urged. “This isn’t your fault. It’s nobody’s fault.” She sniffled and leaned forward to brush the hair from Lori’s face. “It’s not fair. I know. It hurts like hell. I know that, too. But you’re alive. You made it. And I know you feel like you want to die, but you’ll keep going. You have someone to keep going for.” Lori brushed the tears from her cheeks, and she took a shaky breath.

“Is Carl ok?”

“He’s worried about you. Sophia’s been keeping him occupied, I think. He keeps asking to see you.” Lori sniffled and sat up a little in bed. Carol helped her by putting a pillow behind her back. The bloody sheets were gone, discretely pushed to the bottom of the hamper to be taken out after everyone was sleeping.

“Will you get him for me? I need my boy,” she choked out.

“I will,” Carol promised. Lori wiped furiously at her eyes again, and Carol shook her head. “You don’t have to do that. Seeing you cry won’t break him. You don’t have to hide anything.” Lori nodded and coughed and blew her nose with a tissue from her nightstand.

“Ok. Ok. I’m ok.” She blew out a slow breath and looked Carol in the eye. “Thank you for being here.”

“That’s what friends do,” Carol whispered. She’d done it for Lori, because nobody had done it for her. She hadn’t had friends. By that point in her marriage, Ed had driven everyone away. Waking up in that much pain without anyone to comfort her had been something she wouldn’t have wished on anyone. “You rest now. I’ll get Carl.” Lori nodded then, and she ran her fingers through her hair. Her eyes were red from crying, her skin pale from blood loss, and the dark circles around them made her face look gaunt and sunken. But she was alive, and that was something.

Carol stood and walked to the door, opening it to find Carl sitting on the floor with his head in his hands. Daryl wasn’t far away, and he started walking her way when he saw her. She leaned down to nudge Carl’s shoulder, and he looked up at her, wiping his eyes and sniffling.

“Someone would _really_ like to see you,” Carol said softly. “Why don’t you go give your mom a hug, huh?” Carl scrambled to his feet.

“She’s ok?”

“She’s awake, and she wants to see you.” Carl looked toward the door and swallowed hard.

“What should I say to her?”

“You don’t have to say anything, but I’m sure a hug would do a lot of good.”

“I won’t hurt her?”

“No,” Carol promised. “You won’t hurt her.” Carl looked up at her with uncertainty in his eyes, but he finally nodded and took a step toward Lori’s room. Once he stepped inside, Carol’s shoulders fell, and she covered her face with her hands. Her shoulders shook, and she tried like hell to keep her tears at bay, but they came uncontrollably. She’d made herself be so strong for so long in that room, and now it felt like the floodgates had opened.

“Hey,” Daryl murmured, walking up to her and pulling his strong arms around her. She choked out a sob and buried her face against his chest. He held her as she broke, and he held her up when her knees buckled. “It’s ok. I’m here. You got me. You ain’t alone.” Daryl led her to their room and into the quiet solace behind the door. He held her again, letting her cry until she was all cried out.

_Author’s Note: Thanks for reading! There’ll be a slight time jump in the next chapter. Nothing too big, but just a nudge to progress the story. Let me know your thoughts on this chapter!_


	41. Chapter 41

Forty-One

Electric. Her nerve endings felt alive, each one sparking and sizzling with each touch of his fingertips, lips and tongue. She gasped and writhed under him, her fingers knotting into his hair, her body thrumming with pleasure. The soft groans that shook from his lips and juddered through her body brought her to her peak. And after, a tangle of sweaty limbs and heaving chests, they lay in the early morning light, fingers slipping over warm flesh until the came back down to earth.

“Missed this,” Daryl murmured, pressing kisses to the shell of her ear. She smiled and ran her hand over the rough stubble on his chin.

“Me too,” she whispered. The last couple of weeks had been busy with preparations for the merge with Negan’s group. After Siddiq had saved Lori’s life, there wasn’t much to put a vote to, and neither Rick nor Shane had any qualms. A vote had taken place for ceremony, but all were in agreement that a doctor was needed, and if a doctor came with people, then adjustments would be made.

Rick and Negan had met, discussed their ideas, and while both were hesitant about each other, they could agree that people needed people, and building something of a life for a sustainable future was the most important thing. It wouldn’t be easy making a go of it at first, but at least at Claypool, there were sturdy walls and the potential to expand as a community. There was enough shelter for both groups plus many, many more.

The second dorm had been completely cleared and prepared for the new arrivals who were going to be bussed in later that afternoon. Supply runs and fuel runs had become priority in the days leading up to the merge, because the winter was getting colder, and the burden of keeping everyone warm and healthy was going to be the number one goal of surviving the winter. That had made the days long, the nights short and with Carol struggling to hide her nausea, they’d spent most of their nights just cuddled up together for warmth. This morning was the first in weeks Carol had woke up feeling like herself again.

“I can’t guarantee I won’t be hanging my head over the toilet later,” she pointed out. “But this was fun.” Daryl snorted and buried his face against her neck. His hand ghosted over the swell of her belly. Almost overnight, her belly started to actually look pregnant. The fact that she’d made a conscious effort these past couple weeks to take better care of herself and eat more had certainly helped. Her breasts were fuller, and the small swell of her lower belly was currently the object of Daryl’s obsession. He was always touching her, always kissing her, always placing his hand there, even if they were just lying in bed together reading.

She wondered if seeing the grief in Rick and Shane’s faces had something to do with it. Sometimes, she looked at him and saw something flash in his eyes. Worry, panic, something else? She knew it was in the back of his mind. Lori had come so close to dying, too, and she knew he’d thought about the what ifs. She had, too. But they hadn’t talked about it. They’d kept themselves busy and spent their alone time together just enjoying the quiet and closeness of being together. The idea of having a real doctor coming along certainly eased her worries, but she knew anything could happen. She already had low expectations for the pregnancy, given her past history. Letting herself think about dying herself was not an option. It couldn’t be. Not yet. It was always in the back of her mind, but she worked hard to keep her mind busy with other things like planning scavenging trips and getting things in order for the new group.

Daryl was already the doting partner. He got her things she needed when she was nauseated. He snuck down to the cafeteria when she woke in the middle of the night with a hankering for something sweet or salty. He would rub her feet or rub her stomach when she just needed to unwind.

Carol wasn’t used to this kind of affection, but she wasn’t letting her past hinder her enjoyment of the present. While she was still trying to distance herself and keep her hopes and expectations low, she couldn’t help but think about how this brash, almost feral man she’d met at the quarry in the spring had turned out to be a doting, loving, protective partner who made the troubles of the new world melt away with a look or a touch. She was thankful for him, and seeing him so curious and captivated by the way her body was changing as their baby grew made her heart so full she felt it might burst.

“You feel anything yet?” Daryl asked. Carol’s stomach muscles jumped at the tickle of his fingertips over her lower abdomen. She grinned and shook her head.

“No, it’s a little early,” she said softly. “Probably not for a few weeks. I’ll feel it long before you can. It’ll feel like bubbles sometimes. Little flutters. I remember that much.” She took a deep breath, and Daryl kissed her softly, slowly. She tasted herself on his lips, and she tugged at his bottom lip with her teeth. He chuckled, and Carol’s eyes darkened with desire.

“Again?” he teased, pressing kisses to her collarbone, nipping at the freckles with his teeth.

“Something else I remembered about being pregnant,” she murmured, pushing back against his shoulders and climbing over him to straddle his hips. “I got _really_ horny. A lot.” Daryl’s face flushed pink, but he couldn’t stop the smirk on his lips. “But, I had Ed, so I usually took care of it myself.”

“Don’t gotta worry about that,” he groaned, hands sliding up her thighs and around to her ass. “I’m here whenever you need me.” Carol smiled down at him, and she was about to reach between them to stroke his dick when a heavy knock came to the door. Daryl’s head slammed back against the pillow.

“Just a minute!” Carol called, scrambling off of him in case their visitor was Sophia. She pulled the blanket up around herself, and Daryl shoved a pillow over his lap to hide his erection.

“It’s Glenn,” Glenn called awkwardly behind the door. “Uh, I have Merle on the walkie for you.”

“Can you take it?” Daryl asked, glancing at Carol who was failing to hide the grin on her face.

“I tried that. He said, and I quote, ‘don’t be a little bitch. Go get my brother.”

“Yeah,” Daryl snorted. “Sounds like Merle to me.” He grunted. He huffed and rolled out of bed, keeping the pillow over his groin as he bare feet slapped against the floor. He opened the door just a little, and Glenn slipped the walkie through.

“Good morning,” Glenn offered with a nervous smile.

“Yeah,” Daryl muttered. “Was about to be even better ‘til you knocked.” Glenn shot him a look and blushed when he accidentally saw a peak of Carol on the bed with the sheet pulled up around her. He cleared his throat and averted his eyes.

“I…uh…I’m gonna go see if breakfast is ready.” He hurried off, and Daryl shut the door, propping the chair under the door handle and letting the pillow fall away as he started back across the room.

“Merle,” he grunted into the walkie. Carol watched him, letting her gaze wander down his body. “Merle, you there?” Daryl was still half-hard, and Carol couldn’t pass up the opportunity to make him squirm. She scrambled out of bed and got on her knees in front of him. Daryl’s jaw clenched when he realized what she was doing, and just as she took him in her hand, Merle’s voice came out over the walkie.

“Hey, baby brother. You’re fallin’ back on old habits, sleepin’ in so damn late.”

“Wasn’t asleep,” Daryl muttered without holding the button down. Carol snickered, and he groaned when she took him in her mouth. “Christ!”

“You there, Darylina?”

“Fuck off, Merle,” Daryl bit out, hips jutting forward as Carol teased him and sucked him until she pulled back and let him go with a satisfying _pop_. “Where are you?”

“Still at Terminus. Was hopin’ you’d come give us a hand with the rest of this shit. Doc’s got some equipment we’re gonna need a little more manpower to lift.” Daryl’s eyes rolled back when Carol took him in her mouth again.

“Fuck, Carol,” he panted. “I can’t think straight.”

“Hmm,” she hummed around him, making his knees go weak. She pushed back on his stomach, urging him to sit on the edge of his bed. He fell back onto it, the metal frame unyielding against his ass. He knew it’d hurt later, but this was too damn good to stop now. She crawled between his legs again, pumping him with her hand as she teased the head of his cock with the tip of her tongue.

“Daryl? You there? You jerkin’ off? Get your head in the game, baby brother.”

“What time?” Daryl choked out with as much strength as he could muster.

“Meet us in an hour? Might bring Officer Friendly along, too. And that other one. The asshole cop. Officer Friendly’s pal.”

“Yeah, I’ll see what I can do,” Daryl muttered. “One hour.” The radio went silent and Daryl tossed it down beside him on the bed just as Carol cupped his balls and gave them a squeeze. “Fuck, Carol, you’re fuckin’ killin’ me.”

“Hmm? Me?” Carol asked with a Cheshire grin. Daryl groaned when she slipped him between her lips again, pulling up slowly, the suction too much for Daryl to take. He groaned and pushed her away gently before he joined her down on the floor. She quirked an eyebrow, and he motioned for her to get up on her knees and brace herself against the side of the bed.

“Can’t fuckin’ take it,” he choked out, coming up behind her, wrapping his hands around her hips. He pressed up against her, and she glanced at him over her shoulder before he lined up and pushed all the way in. She gasped, slamming back against his pelvis, her pussy clenching around him as he filled her.

“Fuck, Daryl,” she hissed out. Daryl put his hand over her mouth and gently bit her ear.

“Best be quiet, sweetheart.” She turned her head to glare at him, and he smirked in that way that drove her wild. She loved it when he got cocky with her, and he knew it. For a moment, he broke character and tenderly cupped her cheek and leaned in to kiss her. “This ok? I ain’t hurtin’ you?”

“You won’t break me,” she promised. He knew he had to hold back. He didn’t want to hurt the baby, and they _both_ knew he was holding back, but he knew how to make her cum and made her cry out his name until her lungs were breathless and her legs were jelly.

He gripped her hips again, and she faced forward, rocking with him as he pushed into her, setting a quick, hungry pace. His hands gripped her hips to the point when he pulled them away, her flesh was pale where his fingers were. He kissed the back of her neck and down her spine as his hands moved around, one hand sliding between her legs to tease her clit while the other arm wrapped firmly under her breasts to hold her and give himself leverage.

When she let go and started to collapse against the bed frame, he held her up, thrusting through her waning climax until he came, a slew of curses muffled against the back of her neck as he spilled inside of her.

“Jesus,” he panted, slipping up and getting to his knees. 

“Mmm,” she sighed. “That was fun.” He snorted and held his hand out to help her stand. She took it and stood up, standing on her tiptoes to kiss him properly.

“You ok?” he asked, hands trailing down her back and pulling her close.

“I’m great now,” she grinned. “If you didn’t have to leave, I’d be willing to go for round three.” Her lower lip poked out, and god damn it, he couldn’t resist. He pulled her in, sucking her lip into his mouth, teasing her, trailing his hand down her stomach and between her legs. She gasped when he slipped his fingers between her folds, and she grinded down against him, desperate for friction. “Fuck….Daryl!” She was panting against his lips, curling her arms around his neck to anchor herself. “You better not— _oh!_ —start something you can’t finish.” Daryl pulled back just enough to see her beautiful eyes, pupils blown wide as her lips panted with desperate gasps for breath.

“Fuck,” he groaned. “I can be ten minutes late.”

“Ten minutes? Someone’s ambitious,” she teased.

“Stahp,” he muttered against her lips. She giggled against his lips before he showed her just how ambitious he could be.

_Author’s Note: Thanks for reading! Please let me know how you’re liking the story!_


	42. Chapter 42

Forty-Two

“Shit, it’s cold.” Carol turned on her heels and stared at her thirteen-year-old daughter. Sophia’s eyes went wide, and Daryl stifled a snort.

“What did you just say?” Carol asked, raising her eyebrows in surprise.

“Sorry,” she muttered.

“Hmm.” Carol felt Daryl’s hand on her arm when she got close to a snow-covered stump. She stepped over it without looking and gave him a look. “I saw it, you know.”

“Yeah, m’sure you did.”

“I did!” she insisted. “I think I could’ve been an excellent woods-woman,” she teased. Carol looked over her shoulder at Sophia. “Don’t you think so? Once upon a time, we could have lived in a cabin in the woods, lived off the land.”

“Would’ve been boring,” Sophia pointed out. “But boring’s better than what we had.” Sophia shivered and hugged her arms around herself. She stumbled over an ice-covered rock, and Daryl reached out to steady her. “Sorry.”

“Don’t gotta apologize. Your leg’s doin’ a lot better. Your limp’s almost gone. ‘Fore you know it, you’ll be runnin’ through these woods better’n me,” Daryl pointed out. Sophia ducked her head, and her scarf came up over her nose and mouth to hide her rosy cheeks.

“I’m too clumsy,” Sophia pointed out.

“Who got them rabbits for supper?” Daryl asked, holding up the lumpy burlap sack. “That ain’t beginner’s luck, neither. You’re as good a shot as your mom.” Carol glanced back at Sophia and offered her an encouraging grin.

“I like rabbits,” Sophia sighed. “I feel bad. Maybe they had babies.”

“Don’t think about it,” Carol said quietly. “You eat what the world provides for you now. Today it’s rabbit. Tomorrow it might be owl.” Sophia made a face. “See? It could always be worse.” She looked around, shivering under heavy coat. The sunlight filtered down between the bare tree branches, and a gentle breeze blew glittering snow from them down to earth.

She went still for a moment, closing her eyes and letting the sunshine warm her face for a moment. And as Daryl stepped up beside her, she felt something, just the tiniest something that may have been nothing, and she gasped. Her hand moved to her belly, and Daryl immediately put his hand on her back.

“You ok?”

“Uh,” she huffed out, a little smile threatening to pull at her lips. “Yeah. Yeah, I think so.”

“You hurtin’?”

“No. No. I think….I’m not sure—it’s so early—but I think I just felt the baby.”

“What?” His hand moved to her belly right away, and she smiled.

I could be wrong. I probably won’t feel much of anything for a few more weeks. You won’t feel it for a while after that.”

“Oh.” He almost looked disappointed, standing there with his hand still on her belly and the excitement slowly retreating from his bright, blue eyes. She stuck her lower lip out, faux pouting. “I promise the first time I feel it with my hand, I’ll tell you so you can feel it too.”

“What’s going on?” Sophia asked, stepping up beside her mother.

“Your mom thinks she felt the baby.”

“Really?!” Sophia asked, eyes lighting up.

“Maybe,” Carol smiled. She started walking again, a smile still upon her lips. She was about fourteen weeks, and she still wasn’t really showing. To her, it was obvious. To Daryl, too. But nobody seemed to notice anything, and Siddiq had been kind enough to keep things quiet. While HIPAA wasn’t really a thing anymore, he at least respected Carol’s wishes not to go talking about her condition to anyone else.

She was still trying to find a way to tell Lori. In the past few weeks, Lori’s condition had improved, and she’d been staying close to Rick and Carl. Carol was glad her friend’s family life was improving. Carl was very attentive toward his mother, making sure she didn’t overwork herself. Rick had been very protective and seemed to look guilty most of the time, as if he somehow blamed himself for what had happened.

The merge with Negan’s group was still an ongoing process. While the second dorm building was currently being occupied by the newbies, the groups ate together, did supply runs together and pretty much spent their days making plans and preparations for the spring when they could start building and gardening and making a life. The winter cold had everyone feeling less than hopeful, but crisp, sunny mornings like this were good for the soul.

Negan, Merle, Glenn and Maggie had gone out scavenging, while Carol and Daryl had taken the opportunity to give Sophia some hunting lessons. Daryl was right. The girl was a good shot, and while Carol wasn’t thrilled about the idea of her little girl learning how to use a weapon, she knew that not preparing her was a death sentence.

“I think it’s a boy,” Sophia spoke up as they stepped over the narrow foot bridge over the river they’d crossed over an hour ago.

“You do, huh?” Daryl asked.

“Yeah. I’d like to have a sister, but I really think it’s gonna be a boy.” Carol was the first off the bridge, and she turned to watch Sophia and then Daryl step off. “What do you want, Mom?”

“I want to get home and clean these rabbits for supper tonight,” Carol said with a shrug. Sophia made a face and looked at Daryl.

“I don’t have to do that, do I?”

“Hell yes,” Daryl said with a nod. “You never know when ya might be caught outside with nobody to do it for you. Now as long as I’m around, I’m gonna see to it that don’t happen, but you gotta be prepared, just in case.” Sophia’s nose scrunched up, and Carol chuckled.

“If I do that, then I _really_ won’t be able to eat it.”

“If you’re hungry enough, you will,” Carol pointed out.

“We still have beef stew.”

“Some, but we’re rationing. We have a lot of extra mouths to feed now, so we have to be careful. But, we’re hoping we’ll have a good garden in the Spring, and we can store some things for next winter.” They took a turn following their old footsteps toward the road where the truck was parked. Carol eyed Sophia. “Is everyone from Negan’s group treating you ok? You’ve been pretty quiet around them.”

“Yeah,” Sophia shrugged. “I like Jesus and Aaron. Oh, and Sasha’s really nice. Duane promised he’d show me how to use a knife against a walker.”

“Uh,” Carol said slowly, “with adult supervision, only. I don’t want you hurting yourself.” Sophia nodded.

“Yeah, if anybody should be teachin’ you how to use a knife, it’s your mama. She’s pretty good,” Daryl reasoned. Carol had noticed Sophia and Duane had been spending a lot of time together, and while she liked that her daughter was making a friend, she also knew that Sophia was growing up, and in this world, that was a rare thing for a child. All she could hope to do was be there for her and guide her as she grew and matured. She only worried, because she’d noticed Carl had seemed a bit jealous about Sophia’s new friend. She had a teenager on her hands in the apocalypse and was about to start all over again with a new baby. The idea of it made her feel about ten years older and like she needed to take a long, long nap.

The cleared the tree line minutes later, and Sophia was the first to stop.

“What’s wrong, Soph?”

“There’s…something in the truck.”

“What?” Daryl asked, narrowing his eyes at the foggy windows.

“It ducked down. There’s someone in there,” she whispered. Carol looked to Daryl, and he nodded his head.

“Wait here. I’ll check it out.” He pulled his crossbow from where it rested on his back, and he walked slowly toward the vehicle. He kept an eye on his surroundings, hearing and seeing no sign of walkers or people, and when he reached the door, he heard something shuffle inside. Then came a whimper. He slowly reached for the door handle, and when he opened it, he quickly pointed his crossbow inside, only to find a shaking, dirty child with a mop of dark, matted hair kicking and sliding across the bucket seat toward the driver’s side door. The big, brown eyes that stared out frantically at him were filled with tears, and the stunted whimpers that followed were full of genuine fear. The child looked malnourished. The hands were bruised and scraped, and the little green backpack clutched in those hands was splattered with blood.

Daryl lowered his crossbow, and he held his hand up.

“Hey. Hey, it’s ok. Where’d you come from?” The child looked up and around, pressing herself up further against the door as if trying to disappear into it entirely.

“Daryl? What is it?” Carol called, stepping closer cautiously with her arm around Sophia. Daryl held his hand up toward her.

“It’s ok,” he said quietly. “I…I think it’s a little girl.”

_Author’s Note: If you’re still reading, please let me know. Thanks._


	43. Chapter 43

Forty-Three

The child had managed to crawl down onto the floor board. With the steering wheel between her and Daryl, she pulled her arms around her knees and hugged them to her chest.

“Hey. It’s ok. Where’d you come from?” The child sniffled and blinked back tears that streaked paths down her dirty cheeks. “I ain’t gonna hurt you.” He motioned for Carol to come closer. She stepped around, and Sophia stood lookout, poised and with her eyes trained ahead but focusing on her peripheral in case any stray walkers ambled out of the woods.

Carol took a few tentative steps toward Daryl, and when she came up beside him and peered into the Jeep Cherokee, the little girl’s eyes widened further, and she gasped softly.

“Hi, sweetheart,” Carol whispered. “It’s ok. We won’t hurt you.” She took a slow step toward the car, and Daryl put his crossbow down on the ground, showing the child he meant no harm. Still, she wasn’t having it. She dug her heels into the carpet on the floor board and grabbed the base of the steering wheel to try and pull herself further back behind it.

“Is she ok, Mom?” Sophia whispered. Carol stared at the little girl, watching the way she flinched at the new voice. She curled herself up, almost like she was trying to crawl inside herself and disappear. Bruises on the child’s wrists and hands and the way she shook all over even when someone approached her in with a soft voice was telling. This child had been abused, and it broke Carol’s heart.

“My name’s Carol,” Carol said softly. “This is our truck. Did you climb inside to get warm? It’s awful cold out here.” The little girl whimpered and squeezed her eyes shut tight. She pointed to Daryl. “That’s Daryl. He didn’t mean to scare you with his crossbow. We were out hunting for food. I think you surprised us as much as we surprised you.” The little girl said nothing, but Carol continued, anyway. “I have a little girl, myself. She’s older than you, though. How old are you? Four? Five?” Carol held her fingers up, indicating those numbers. The little girl’s fingers were turning white from where they clutched at her knees. “Can…can I turn the truck on so we can get some heat for you?” She motioned for Daryl to hand her the keys. They tinkled together gently before resting in Carol’s hand. She took a step toward the truck. “I’m just going to reach inside and turn the engine on, ok? I won’t touch you.” She slid the keys into the ignition with a click, and the little girl flinched at the sound. Carol turned the key, and the engine roared to life, and the little girl gasped and climbed back up onto the driver’s seat. “It’s ok. It’s ok.” Cool air came blasting through the vents. “It’ll warm up in a few minutes, ok?” She took a step back to stand beside Daryl again.

“What are we gonna do with her?” Daryl asked quietly. Carol glanced at him and saw him swallow hard. He looked at her, and she saw such sadness in his eyes as his own memories haunted him. She reached over and took his hand.

“We can’t take her back with all those people,” she said quietly. “She’s terrified.”

“We just let her go?” Daryl asked. “Can’t do that.”

“No,” Carol whispered. “We can’t. But she’s filthy, and she has to be hungry. She needs tended to. She needs love.” Carol glanced over at Sophia.

“Is she ok?” Sophia asked quietly. Carol swallowed hard and shook her head.

“No, honey. I don’t think she is.” She watched the sadness in her daughter’s eyes and remembered a couple of occasions with Sophia was small where she’d curled herself up between her bed and the wall and cried until the shouting stopped. Carol would check on her after, always finding her tucked up against the wall with her arms wrapped around her legs.

“Can I try?” Sophia asked. Carol looked at Daryl and then back at the little girl. Finally, Carol motioned for Sophia to come forward.

Sophia came around to the back passenger’s side door and climbed into the back seat. The little girl whimpered softly, and looked to Sophia who shut the door and put her seat belt on like nothing was wrong.

“I’m hungry,” Sophia said quietly. “Do you like rabbit? I think it’s pretty good. It’s real good the way my mom fixes it. She knows the best spices to use on it. And spices are really hard to find now.” She patted her jacket pocket. “Oh! Do you like chocolate? I have half a bar left. It’s kinda stale, but it still tastes ok.” The little girl eyed her warily from where she was huddled, and the wrapper crinkled in Sophia’s hand. She leaned forward and sat it on the front seat. “It’s ok. You can have it. I don’t want to spoil my supper.”

The little girl’s eyes shifted, and she looked back to Carol and Daryl briefly before looking at the candy bar and then Sophia.

“You know, when I was your age, I used to get really scared, too. I’d curl up and hide, and sometimes I’d cry if I got too scared. But when the scary stuff was over, my mom always came and gave me a big hug and told me that everything was going to be ok. It will, you know? Things get really scary sometimes, but they can get better, too.” Sophia leaned her head back against the rest of her seat. “I bet you miss your mom. Did you get separated? Or did the monsters come?” The little girl’s lower lip jutted out, and she reached for the candy bar. She brought it to her mouth, taking a tiny nibble before popping the whole piece in her mouth.

Carol took a step back from the vehicle, and Daryl followed suit. They took a few steps toward the tree line, giving Sophia a little time with the girl.

“That was my favorite kind, you know, from Before. My mom always let me pick something if she had money left over when we went to the grocery store. I always got those. You like it?” The little girl actually nodded. Sophia smiled. “Where’s your mom? Your dad?” The little girl blinked at her, and Sophia cocked her head to the side. “My dad’s dead. The monsters got him. He was a bad man. Did the monsters get your dad, too?” The little girl flinched, and Sophia slumped in her seat, propping her elbows on her lap and resting her chin in her hands. “My mom’s here. And Daryl’s a better dad already than my own dad was. He looks out for me. He even saved my life in the summer. He’s real nice.”

She leaned back again and used her finger to draw a heart through the window fog.

“I almost got lost in the woods. It was scary. The monsters were after me, but Daryl found me. I got hurt really bad first, though.” She looked back at the child who had lifted her head a little. She was staring at Sophia as if she was taking in each and every word the older girl said.

Out in the snow, Carol was shivering. Daryl could see it, and when he reached out for her, she just about fell into him, wrapping her arms around him for warmth.

“See you ain’t got a problem with my heat now,” he teased. Carol snorted and buried her face against his neck. “Think Sophia’s ok in there?”

“Mmm, looks like she’s got her attention.” Carol peeked over into the front seat to see the little girl slowly letting her guard down. She wasn’t hugging her knees anymore, and she had a hand on the front seat, leaning in as Sophia spoke quietly.

“Wonder what she’s sayin’ to her?” Daryl asked.

“Don’t know, but I think it’s working,” she whispered.

“S’gonna snow again,” he muttered, looking up at the sky. “We got a twenty-minute drive back home, but by the looks of those clouds, if we don’t leave now, we ain’t gonna make it.”

“I don’t think we’re going home tonight,” Carol said quietly. She pulled back a little to look at Daryl properly. “We can’t leave her here, but if we take her back home with all those people, she’s gonna be scared to death. More so than she is right now.”

“What do you suggest?”

“I don’t know. Find a place for the night. Walkie Negan to swing by on his way back home and take Sophia home with their scavenging party. We can stay with her for a couple days, clean her up, feed her, try and figure out where the hell she came from.”

“Think she’s just an orphan.”

“If she is, it hasn’t been long. Whoever she was with didn’t love her. Didn’t care about her.”

“You think we can help her?” he wondered.

“She probably doesn’t think anybody can. She’s too young to know how to talk about it, but she’s just a little girl. There has to be _something_ we can do.” She thought for a moment. “Remember that big, old house we cleared out last week? The big one with the brick wall all around the property? You said the place was awful big for somebody that didn’t have any family pictures on the wall.”

“Yeah, I remember the place.”

“We could take her there. I know there’s a few things we didn’t have room in the truck to take home. We can grab those when we’re ready to leave. Negan and Rick know where the place is.” Daryl nodded.

“Alright. We’ll go. I got bolt cutters in the back. We’ll cut through the chain on the gate, get in that way. We’ll stick close together in case anything got in since we was there. I doubt it, but we can’t be too careful.”

Carol hugged him again, but that was short lived, as a rustling from the woods startled them both. They turned to see three walkers coming toward them from where they’d just walked out minutes ago.

“Daryl,” Carol gasped.

“I know. Noise must’ve drawn ‘em,” he muttered. “C’mon.” He took her hand and led her toward the truck.

Carol hopped in the passenger’s side, and the little girl’s eyes went wide again. But before she had the chance to shrink back, Daryl pulled open the driver’s side door and grabbed the child. She let out a scream, and he opened the back door and put her in next to Sophia. The little girl struggled when Daryl picked her up, but once she was in the back with Sophia, she slid across the seat and buried her face against Sophia’s arm. Daryl slammed the door shut and jumped into the driver’s seat. The wheels spun for a second before they sped off down the road. Carol looked into the mirror on her door to see more walkers coming out of the tree line and heading down toward the road.

Daryl looked in the rear-view mirror just in time to see the little girl get up on her knees, looking out the back window with her arms outstretched toward the herd. She was sobbing , and Sophia reached out to touch her arm. She didn’t flinch away this time, but the mournful sounds she made were heartbreaking to say the least.

“M'sorry,” Daryl murmured, as Carol took his hand in the front of the truck. “I know you’re scared, but you’re safe now. Everything’s gonna be alright.”

_Author’s Note: Thanks for reading. Hope you are still enjoying the story. Feedback would be lovely._


	44. Chapter 44

Forty-Four

A few walkers came out of the woods when the brakes heeled as Daryl pulled up to the gates of the old house. They were a half mile down the road, so he didn’t feel terribly concerned, but he still made haste in grabbing the cutters from the back and going up to work on cutting the lock from the chain.

Carol grabbed for the walkie that sat on the seat next to her, and she looked to Sophia.

“I’m gonna have Rick come pick you up, ok?”

“No, I wanna stay,” Sophia insisted. The frightened little girl in the back seat recoiled, as if waiting for a punishment for the older girl’s disobedience.

“Sophia…”

“No, Mom. Please. I want to help. It’s safe here, right?” Carol looked out to see Daryl unwrapping the chain from the gates. She knew he’d be able to secure it again, but she still worried. “I remember you said there’s still food in the pantry. I won’t go hungry. I won’t freeze. I want to stay with you.” Carol sighed softly. She knew her daughter had her at that point. “Please. I can help.” Carol sighed and closed her eyes for a moment before finally nodding.

“It’s just for a couple days,” Carol pointed out. Sophia nodded. “Then we’re all going home together.”

“Ok,” Sophia agreed with a triumphant smile. Carol brought the walkie up to her mouth and took a deep breath before speaking.

“Negan, this is Carol.”

_“Carol, this is Glenn. Go ahead.”_

“Glenn? Everything ok?”

_“Oh, yeah. Great. Negan can’t shut up long enough to clear a house. We’ve run from two small herds today.”_

“Where’s everyone else?”

_“Oh, Maggie’s right here. She says hi. Merle’s raiding the basement for booze, and Negan’s outside putting down the walkers he attracted because he can’t shut up. You guys good? Get anything good? A deer, maybe?”_

“We had some luck, but, uh, we’re not going to make it home tonight.”

_“Everything ok?”_

“We’re fine. We just ran into a situation. We’re ok. Sophia’s fine, I’m fine, Daryl’s fine. I’ll tell you more later, but there’s no time right now. We’re staying up at that big old house we scavenged at last week. Rick and Negan know the place. We’ll be home soon, but not yet.”

_“That wasn’t the plan. You should come home.”_

“We’re just fine, Glenn. We have food and water, and the place is well-protected. We’ll be home when we’re home. Tell Rick if he doesn’t hear from us by tomorrow night, someone should come out. Otherwise, we’ll keep in touch. I have to go. Let me know you understand.”

 _“Copy,”_ Glenn muttered reluctantly. _“Be safe.”_ Carol put the walkie down, and took a deep breath.

Sophia relaxed against her seat, feeling a little better that the rest of the group knew where they were. She looked to the little girl who was shaking in the seat next to her. “Don’t worry. Everybody’s real nice back home.” She nodded to the little girl. “My mom’s really good at fixing scratches, too. She can fix your hands, and maybe she can brush your hair out, too. I promise it won’t hurt too bad. You just have to squeeze your eyes shut tight and remember to brush your hair more so the knots don’t get so bad.”

The girl looked from Sophia to Carol, and Carol turned a little further in her seat to look at her.

“I know it’s scary, sweetheart. I know you’re afraid to say anything or trust anybody. But, I promise you, if you tell us what happened, if you tell us where your parents are, we’ll do our best to get you back to them.” The little girl whimpered again, and Carol swallowed hard. “And if your parents are gone, that’s ok too, because you’re safe with us. It’s ok to be scared. But we won’t hurt you. And we won’t make you do anything you don’t want to do, ok? We just want to keep you safe.”

“Hey!” Daryl called from the gates. Carol looked back to him. “Go ahead and pull on through. I’ll secure the gate!” Carol slid into the driver’s seat and shifted the vehicle into gear. The gate opened with a loud groan, and Carol drove on through as a fresh round of snow began to drift down to earth from the cloudy sky above.

*~*~*~*~*~*

“You’re sure she sounded ok?” Andrea asked from where she sat with her leg propped up on the chair. Her injury was healing, and she got around just fine on crutches, but every now and then she had to elevate her foot to relieve some of the aches the cold winter brought to her bones.

Merle knelt down in front of Andrea’s chair and propped another pillow under the one her socked foot was resting on. His eyes met hers for a moment, and she offered him a small smile.

“She sounded fine,” Glenn said with a shrug.

“She did,” Maggie agreed. “I was standing right there. She said she’d call us more for later.”

“It’s starting to snow pretty hard,” Hershel offered, peering out the window near the table. “They probably didn’t want to chance getting caught in a whiteout. They’ll be fine. Carol and Daryl are capable of taking care of themselves, and Sophia’s learning, too.”

“With parents like that, the kid’s gonna be a force to reckon with,” Negan smirked from his seat at the end of the table.

“I don’t like this,” Lori chimed in. “What if they got into some trouble with somebody? What if they were being forced to say those things?”

“I don’t think so,” Glenn disagreed. “She sounded fine. Besides, she told us to come after them if we didn’t hear by them by tomorrow night.”

“Maybe that was a call for help,” Shane offered. Rick rubbed the back of his neck for a moment and then looked to Merle.

“Try calling her.” Merle grabbed for the walkie, and he cleared his throat.

“Claypool to Carol. Come in, Carol.” Static came through on the channel for a moment, before a soft voice answered.

_“Claypool, this is Sophia.”_

“Hey, darlin’. Is your mama around?”

_“She’s in the kitchen.”_

“Well, what about Daryl?”

 _“Daryl’s outside fixing the gate._ ”

“Everything ok?”

 _“Yeah, everything’s fine. We found somebody_.” Merle glanced at Rick who shifted uneasily on where he stood.

“Found somebody? What kind of somebody?”

 _“A little girl_. _She hid in our truck when we were hunting. She’s scared, and Mom didn’t want to bring her back right away.”_ Rick and Shane looked at each other as if bells and whistles were going off in their heads. Rick crossed the room and took the walkie from Merle.

“Sophia, it’s Rick. You said you found a little girl?”

_“Yeah. She was all alone and pretty scratched up. Don’t think she’s bit, though. She’s just real scared. Mom wants to bring her back to Claypool in a few days. She almost acts like the wild kittens we had under our back porch, you know, Before. They wouldn’t come near me. They would hiss and scratch, and Mom said it was best to leave them alone. I’ve never seen a wild girl before.”_

“Sophia, are you sure everything’s ok? It was just the little girl you found?”

_“Yeah. Just her. I better go.”_

“Be safe. Tell your mom and Daryl to contact us later, ok?”

_“Ok. Are Carl and Duane there?”_

“Right here, Sophia,” Rick affirmed.

 _“Hi, Carl. Hi Duane! I’ll see you soon!_ _Sophia, over and out._ ” Rick lowered the walkie, and he placed it down on the table.

“Well, I’m convinced,” Rosita said with a shrug. “Kid sounded ok to me.”

“Still, I’d feel better if we swung by the place tomorrow to check on things,” Rick said with a little nod.

“Might just ride along with you, Officer,” Merle offered. “That’s my family out there, after all.” Rick swallowed back his disappointment on his ride-along partner, but he couldn’t really say no to the man. After all, he and Daryl were blood. 

“Alright,” Rick agreed with a reluctant nod. “Tomorrow, then.”

*~*~*~*~*~*

It was a mansion. No doubt about that. And Carol realized she hadn’t taken the time to really appreciate the massiveness of the place when they were there last. It was a beautiful place, really. There were dual staircases, each leading up to a landing with a big, oak table that held a vase with a giant bouquet of dry, dead flowers. The steps were marble, Carol was certain, and the large rug that was spread across the foyer probably cost at least ten grand.

Just inside the door, there was a large library with a desk, a computer and floor to ceiling, wall to wall shelves filled with thousands of books. Across the hall was the family room, or what would have been a family room had the previous owner _had_ a family. A large, wrap-around sofa that was big enough to fit a dozen people wrapped around one corner. A flat-screen TV twice the size of the one Ed constantly had the sports channel tuned into was mounted sturdily across from the sofa. There was a cabinet filled with DVDs and CDs against the wall that led into a big dining room. The table looked like something out of a big, corporate meeting room. There were fourteen chairs around it with a large spread of more dead, dry flowers as the centerpiece. In one corner was a bar comparable to something in a fancy hotel. Bottles of high-end whiskeys and bourbons and other liquors lined the glass shelves.

The kitchen was another marvel. There were big, oak cabinets and an island with a marble countertop that looked like it cost more than the house Ed bought them when they first got married. There was a cellar with food as well as a walk-in pantry, and while they’d raided that, there was still some left behind, which Carol was thankful for.

Her favorite feature of the big, beautiful old house that should have been a home was the giant clawfoot tub upstairs. It was big enough for two people to sprawl out comfortably in, and it was the center feature of the big bathroom. A large, glass, walk-in shower complete with a sprinkler-like shower head was across the way. But that bathtub was something else. It was pristine and white. The claw feet were painted gold. Hell, who was she kidding? They were most certainly gold. The tub was as lavish as the rest of the house. The master bedroom across the hall was three times as big as the one she once shared with Ed. The smaller rooms were only slightly smaller, and each room was just as grand as the last. Before, she would have been terrified to touch anything, terrified of soiling something so perfect.

She slung her pack into a chair in the corner of the bathroom, while the little girl with matted hair and a grubby backpack trembled in the corner.

“Don’t forget to radio Claypool later, Mom,” Sophia reminded her, stepping into the bathroom.

“I promise I won’t forget,” Carol assured her. “Now, where’s Daryl on getting that generator up and going?” Sophia shrugged and flipped the light switch. Nothing. Carol sighed and nodded her head before turning her attention back to the little girl. “I bet it’s been a while since you’ve had a bath, huh?” The little girl looked to Sophia and then to Carol. “Sophia used to _love_ bath time. I’d put a bunch of suds in there and let her play for an hour before I made her wash.” Sophia grinned at the memory.

“I pretended I was a mermaid and somebody spilled a bunch of soap in my ocean,” Sophia grinned. She opened up the cabinet by the shower and immediately found a bottle of coconut-scented bubble bath. “I used to put so many bubbles in the tub they’d make a big mountain. I’d put a big handful on top of my head, and I’d hide underneath the bubbles and pretend I was under the sea foam and nobody could see me.” The little girl’s eyes grew wide at Sophia’s story. “You want to try?” She looked to Carol and then to Sophia and then nodded.

“I can brush your hair after,” Carol offered softly. “I’ll be really gentle, but we have to get those tangles out, ok?” The little girl sighed softly, and she hugged her backpack to her chest. “I can give this a good wash, too. Is that ok?” The child chewed her bottom lip for a moment.

“It’s ok,” Sophia urged. The little one took a step toward Carol, and Carol stayed put. The child hesitated for a moment and looked at Sophia. Sophia smiled and nodded to her encouragingly. She took another step toward Carol, and she paused for a moment before slowing handing her backpack out to her. Carol smiled a little, taking the filthy item and turning it around. On the front in big, black permanent marker letters was the name LYDIA.

“Lydia?” Carol asked softly. “Is that your name?” The girl whimpered for a moment before nodding. “Lydia. What a pretty name.” Carol reached out for Lydia’s hand, and the child acted as if she didn’t remember what to do. “Come on, sweetheart. Let’s get you cleaned up, ok?” The child took another tentative step forward before reaching up slowly and taking Carol’s hand.

_Author’s Note: Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Feedback is much appreciated._


	45. Chapter 45

Forty-Five

Carol was surprised by the pleasant aroma coming from the kitchen when she came downstairs about an hour later. She found Daryl portioning bits of cooked rabbit meat onto four plates along with some canned beans from down in the cellar.

“Did you season these?” Carol asked, taking a small piece of meat between her fingertips and popping it between her lips. She raised an eyebrow and chewed slowly.

“Good? Too much?”

“I’m impressed,” she grinned. “You did good.”

“You wanna call the kids down?”

“Mmm,” she nodded. “Though Lydia might sleep right through supper. She nearly fell asleep in the tub.”

“Lydia?” Daryl asked.

“It’s her name.”

“Lydia,” Daryl said quietly. “She say anything else?”

“She didn’t even say that. It was written on her backpack in big letters.” She sighed and leaned against the counter. “She has bruises all over her, Daryl. It was heartbreaking. Some of them are yellowed, healing. Some of them are fresh. I don’t know what happened to her out there, but she’s so scared. Sophia sat in the bathroom on a chair by the tub the whole time. It was the only way she’d let me comb the knots out of her hair.”

“Poor kid,” he murmured.

“Yeah.” Carol put her hand on Daryl’s arm. He cleared his throat and put the plates aside before pulling her into his arms. He liked this. He liked standing in the kitchen with her like they were some normal couple in a normal house in a normal world. But they weren’t a normal couple. Not really. Not with their baggage. This wasn’t a normal house. This wasn’t a normal world. But they’d found love despite their pasts and their pain, and seeing that poor child in such a sad, wild state had brought back a lot of painful memories for them both. “You ok?”

“Yeah,” he said with a little nod. “I remember what it was like, bein’ afraid of my own damn shadow. Only thing was, it wasn’t my shadow I was worried about.” He cleared his throat. “What kind of world is this for a kid like that?”

“The kind of world where she needs people like us.” Daryl leaned in and kissed her. “You really wanna take this on?”

“I don’t think we have a choice. I think _she_ chose us. But I can’t _not_ help her.”

“I know. I’m just thinkin’ about everything goin’ on. The baby…you know. It’s gonna be a lot to take on.”

“I feel good,” Carol said quietly. “I know I haven’t been the most…positive person about this pregnancy. I’ve been expecting the worst at every turn, but I feel good. I do. And you what they used to say. ‘It takes a village.’ We definitely have a village. We just need to get her used to us before we introduce her to everybody else.”

“Can’t imagine what that kid’s seen since all this started. Even before. She have anything in her backpack?”

“A teddy bear, a dirty change of clothes and half of a picture. A picture of a man. Her father, maybe. She has his eyes. It was hidden in the lining like she wasn’t supposed to have it.” She shook her head. “Whatever happened to her, she’s not talking about it. She’s not talking about anything.”

“She’ll come around. Takes time, but she will,” Daryl offered with a little nod. Carol sighed softly and nodded her head.

“I’ll go up and get them.”

“I’ll finish settin’ the table,” Daryl replied, leaning over to kiss her on the cheek. Carol smiled and squeezed his hand before heading out of the kitchen and upstairs. She’d found some warm clothes for the girls to wear, and while they were many sizes too big, especially for little Lydia, they were clean and warm and dry.

When Carol tapped on the door of the bedroom she’d last left Sophia and Lydia in, Sophia opened it with a worried look in her eyes.

“Everything ok?” Carol whispered.

“She keep staring out the window,” she whispered back.

“It’s snowing. Maybe she likes the snow.”

“I don’t think it’s that.”

“Supper’s ready. Why don’t you go downstairs and help Daryl finish up. I’ll bring Lydia down in a minute.” Sophia nodded and cast another glance back at Lydia before hurrying off to help Daryl. Carol stepped into the room and moved up behind Lydia at the window. The little girl stood so close, she practically had her nose pressed to the glass.

The snow was coming down so heavily, and it was so dark, Carol could barely make out much of anything besides the falling snow. She could see shadows moving in the patches of moonlight that illuminated the snowy ground. She knew somewhere, out there beyond the gate, there were walkers roaming.

“What do you see?” Carol asked softly. “Hmm?” She gently brushed Lydia’s hair with her fingers. The girl flinched at first, but she then scooted over a little closer to Carol. “Do you see the monsters?” For the first time, Lydia turned her face to look at her. Those big, sad eyes looked right into hers. “They can’t hurt you, sweetheart.” Lydia turned to look out the window again, pointing her finger this time out toward the road. “You’re safe here. The monsters can’t get you here.” Lydia looked up at her again. “I promise. I’ll keep the monsters away, ok?” Carol reached her hand out for the child, and Lydia slowly reached up and put her hand in Carol’s. “You hungry?” Lydia didn’t nod, but she let Carol guide her away from the window. She cast one glance back at it before following her from the room and down to dinner.

*~*~*~*~*

“Fuck, it’s cold.” Rosita blew into her gloved hands.

“Good thing your shift is over then. There’s hot coffee in our dorm if you want.”

“You think they’ll let me in without frisking me?” She was only half serious.

“They’re not that bad.”

“No? Rick’s tolerable, but Shane? I don’t know about him. Sometimes I can’t tell if he wants to kill me or fuck me or a little bit of both.”

“Shane’s...” Glenn was at a loss for words when it came to Shane. “This world either messes with your head, or it makes you stronger. And the cruel thing is, I think the ones it messes with _think_ they’re the strong ones.”

“Yeah, well, I’ll keep my distance if it’s all the same,” Rosita muttered. “Have fun.” She offered him a wave before heading back toward the dorms.

“Hey,” Glenn called. She turned. “If he gives you any trouble, let me know. He’s been through a lot of shit, but that’s no excuse to act like a dick to you.”

“Thanks,” she said with a little smile. Something caught her eye out past the gate, and she squinted. “What’s that?”

“What?” Glenn was still looking at her, and she rolled her eyes a little, gesturing for him to turn around. He followed her lead and looked out past the gate to see a small herd of walkers aimlessly trudging through the snowy streets. Only, there was one stopped right in the middle of the street, still, as if frozen in place.

“Is that…a person?” Rosita asked.

“Can’t be. The walkers would be all over him. Maybe his shoes froze to the ground.”

“I don’t think so,” Rosita said quietly. “I’m gonna get Negan. You should get Rick.” Glenn looked at her, and he narrowed his eyes at her.

“What do you think it is?”

“I don’t know. I’ve heard stories. I mean, that’s it. Just stories. But…”

“What kind of stories?” Glenn asked. Rosita hesitated, and Glenn took a step toward her. “Rosita?”

“Stories about people who walk with the dead. They mask themselves somehow.”

“You mean, like with walker guts? I’ve done that, but trust me, it’s _not_ a good long-term plan.” He looked over his shoulder again. “Look. He’s gone. Whoever…whatever he is, he’s probably off chasing some poor rabbit or deer or something.

“I don’t know. I’m just telling you, the saviors have helped a lot of people. Some of them were just raving like lunatics about people like that.”

“Do you hear yourself?” Glenn asked. “C’mon, you’re talking about ramblings of crazy people, Rosita. This world’s crazy enough without letting somebody’s incoherent ramblings freak you out.”

“Yeah, well, if there’s anything I’ve learned since the world turned to shit, it’s that you have to be prepared for anything. I’ve seen a lot of fucked up things since the End, and I’m not letting my guard down.”

“Fair enough,” Glenn said with a nod. “You’ve probably seen and heard a lot more than us. We were out there on a farm most of the summer, and you were out trying to save people right there outside of Atlanta.”

“Is that an apology for making fun of me?”

“I wasn’t making fun. Just being realistic.” Glenn paused for a moment and shook his head. “Meanwhile, there are man-eating corpses walking around out there, and we’re hiding from them behind a wall. I guess it all sound pretty messed up.”

“I’ll take that as an apology, thank you very much,” Rosita smirked. She looked back out toward the street. “Still, holler if you see anything weird.”

“Weirder than what?” Glenn asked.

“Good point.” Rosita huffed out a laugh. “Stay warm.”

“Yeah, thanks,” Glenn murmured. “Good night, Rosita.”


	46. Chapter 46

Forty-Six

Her fingers tangled in his hair as he pressed open mouthed kisses down the valley between her breasts.Her legs were wrapped tight around him as he pushed deep inside of her, bringing out those whimpers he loved to hear when she was biting her lip and fighting the screams.They were trying to be quiet, but they were pushing each other to the brink.

They hadn’t intended on doing anything but curling up and sleeping, but they’d ended up sleeping on the floor in front of the fire for warmth, and when neither of them could get comfortable, they’d started talking.Talking had led to reminiscing about the early days of their relationship, and that had led to them grunting and panting in a tangled mess of sweaty limbs on the coarse rug in front of a roaring fire.

His hand moved between them, thumb teasing her clit as her walls pulsed and clenched around him.

“Daryl, fuck!” she bit out, gasping against his mouth as his tongue slid between her lips and teased hers.

“Careful, sweetheart,” he grunted.“Don’t wanna wake the girls.”

“They’re asleep on the other side of the house,” she panted.“Might as well be in California, this house is so… _fuck_ …so _big_.”

“Yeah?” he panted. Carol pushed at his shoulder, and he buried his face against her neck.He gripped her hips and tugged her further down the rug.She yelped, a voice in the back of her head telling her she was going to have rug burn in the morning, but damn it if she wasn’t feeling too fucking good to care.

The new angle sparked something in her, and as he pumped his hips against hers, she squeezed her thighs around his waist. It wasn’t long before her back arched, and her arms went limp and sprawled out on the rug under them.Daryl’s fingers dug into her hips, and he found his own release moments later.

He was careful not to fall on her, sliding out of her and collapsing beside her, chest heaving with each heavy breath.

“Where’d that come from?” Carol laughed.

“You’re the one that pounced on me,” Daryl blushed. Carol grinned and rolled onto her side to press kisses to the corner of his mouth.“You tell me?”

“Just taking advantage of the quiet, I suppose,” she sighed. Daryl chuckled, and Carol shivered.She sat up then, scrambling for her clothes, and Daryl lay sprawled out on the rug, watching her flit about the room putting layers back on.She paused when she saw the sleepy grin on his lips.“Aren’t you cold?”

“Come down here and warm me up,” he offered.Carol pouted her lips at him, and she nudged his ribs with her toes.He caught her foot, and she pulled it away before his calloused fingers could tickle her.The windowpanes rattled, and Carol pulled her arms around herself, shivering.

“Jesus, it’s really cold,” she murmured, turning to go to the window.She pulled the curtains back to see the snow coming down so fast and heavy, there was barely any visibility past the yard.“Daryl, it’s _really_ coming down.” There was an edge to her voice that got Daryl to his feet quickly.He wrapped a blanket around his waist and stepped up behind her at the window.

“Looks like we might be stayin’ here more’n just a few days.”

“We should check in back home,” Carol said quietly.“Make sure everybody’s ok back there.”

“I’ll walkie Rick first thing in the mornin’.”Daryl kissed the back of her neck and let his hands moved around to caress her stomach.“You comin’ to bed?”

“Mmm,” she sighed.“Yeah.Let me go check on the girls.Lydia went out like a light, but I don’t know how long that’ll last.Who knows when she slept out there.For all we know, she could be a night owl.”

“Alright.”

“Go get the bed warm for me,” Carol grinned.“I’ll be back soon.”She turned in his arms and kissed him before tearing herself away to go check on the girls.

The house was dark and cold, but the glow from the room at the end of the hall made her feel a little better.The big, four-post bed was big enough for a whole family, and Lydia had been terrified to sleep alone, so Sophia had agreed to share.Carol had added enough wood to the fire to keep them warm through the night, and she wasn’t at all surprised to find both girls curled up under the covers, their backs to each other, their little noses peeking out from the blankets. Carol smiled a little and moved to check on the fire.She used the poker to move the logs around, and the snapping and crackling was a little louder than she anticipated.

“Mom?”Carol turned at her daughter’s whisper.

“It’s ok.Just checking in.You ok?”

“Yeah.Lydia hasn’t moved since she went to sleep.You think she’s ok?”

“I think she’s worn out. But I think she knows she’s safe.Or, at least, she’s trying to understand what safe is supposed to feel like.”Carol moved around to Sophia’s side of the bed and pulled the covers up over her again.“Tuck in tight.It’s really cold tonight.” Sophia nodded.“You’re sure you’re ok in here?”

“Yeah.I’m ok.Besides, she’d be scared if she woke up all alone.”

“You’re gonna be a great big sister.You know that?”She took a shaky breath when Sophia smiled.She knew there were still a hundred things that could go wrong.But she needed to believe in something.She needed something good.She could believe in getting the life she always wanted, even if it didn’t happen to happen at the end of the world.She reached out and pushed Sophia’s hair from her face.

“Mom?”

“Hmm?”

“When we get back home, is Lydia going to stay with us?”

“Well, I don’t know why she can’t,” Carol whispered.“Is that ok?”

“Yeah,” Sophia smiled.“It’s like having a little sister around.It’s kinda cool.”

“Cool, huh?” Carol chuckled.“Well, just remember, she’s going to need a lot of patience and a lot of love. We don’t know what she’s been through.It might take a long time for her to work though it and feel comfortable enough to be herself with us.You understand?”

“Yeah,” Sophia said quietly.“I understand.”And she knew Sophia understood better than most.It had taken the girl a while to get past the urge to flinch anytime somebody raised their voice or came toward her too quickly.She still had her moments.Even though the monster was gone, he still found ways to haunt her thoughts.

“Good.”Carol leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her daughter’s forehead.“Only good dreams, ok?”

“Ok,” Sophia said with a little smile.It was something Carol had said to her at bedtime when she was a little girl.And even now, at thirteen, it still brought a smile to her face.“Love you, Mom.”

“Love you more.”Carol smiled and stood up to walk around to the other side of the bed.Being careful not to wake Lydia, she tucked the blanket around her a little more snugly than it was, and then she moved to add another log to the fire.

She left the door cracked open a little, a habit she’d had since Sophia was a small child, and then she padded down the hall to where she’d left Daryl.She expected to see him already passed out on the bed with his arm draped over his face.Instead, she found him fully dressed and sitting onthe edge of the bed pulling his boots on.

“Daryl?”She saw the worry in his face when he looked up at her, and her stomach clenched.“What’s wrong?”He nodded to the walkie on the bedside table.

“Something’s wrong back home.”

“What?”Carol’s hand flew to her chest.

“Glenn broke through a minute ago.Could barely make out much, but I heard screamin’.He said someone’s dead.”

“Oh Jesus.Daryl, you can’t go out there in this.You’ll get yourself killed!”

“I’ve drove in worse.Somethin’ went south back there, and I don’t wanna drag you or the kids out in it.But I gotta go back, see if there’s anything I can do.”Carol knew he was right.And if it wasn’t for Sophia and Lydia being asleep down the hall or for the baby in her belly, she’d be throwing her clothes on and picking up her weapons at his side.Still, she hated the idea of him going out there in that terrible weather, especially not knowing what he was going to find when he got back home.It was unsettling, and it tore at her.

“Be safe.”

“Nine lives,” he promised.“Keep the walkie on. I’ll turn the one in the truck on.I’ll call you when I’m coming home.”Carol threw her arms around his neck and hugged him tight.“I’m comin’ home, Carol.I promise.”

“You better,” she whispered. “I love you.”

“Love you, too.”He hugged her a little tighter before letting her go.“You know where the guns are?”

“One downstairs in the closet by the door.One on the landing.One in this bedroom closet.One under the bed.”Daryl nodded.

“Good.Alright.I promise I’ll call you as soon as I know anything.”Carol nodded then, following Daryl from the room and down the stairs.She was with him at the door, and when the heavy thing creaked on its hinges, she felt a cold dread hit the pit of her stomach like a brick of lead. The snow was coming down a little lighter now, and it made visibility a little better.Still, it was dark, and for a moment, Carol felt like her eyes were playing tricks on her.

“Daryl?”She pointed out toward the gate, and Daryl squinted in that direction, struggling to see.“Is that…”

“Fuck,” he muttered, stepping out onto the porch with Carol right behind him.He shrugged his coat on and stepped off the porch, starting out toward the gate.Carol started to follow, only to gasp when he turned and started back toward her.“Go back inside. Nobody’s goin’ anywhere tonight.”


	47. Chapter 47

Forty-Seven

Six hours and fifty-three minutes. There had been nothing but static on the radio for six hours and fifty-three minutes. From the porch of the big, old house, Carol and Daryl stood watch as walkers snarled and reached through the bars. The whispers had started just after sunrise. It was an eerie sound that rose up with the raspy snarls and left Carol and Daryl both feeling unsettled and uncertain. Sophia and Lydia were still sleeping, and Carol wondered just how the hell they were going to get out of this predicament.

Negan and Rick knew where to find them. That gave Carol some comfort. The only problem was, they hadn’t heard from the rest of the group in nearly seven hours. There was a possibility that Rick and Negan were dead. Someone was dead. Maybe more than one someone. And now, it seemed, the dead were at the gates to stay, and the whisperers were keeping them there.

Daryl had spotted the first one crouching down to avoid being spotted, something a walker wouldn’t have the mind to do. From inside, he’d taken binoculars and gotten an eyeful of the grotesque, stitched flesh the man wore on his head.

“Who are they?” Carol asked quietly. “What the hell do they want?”

“Maybe they don’t know,” Daryl murmured.

“Are they trying to scare us? Do they want the house? They can have the house.”

“Don’t think they want much of anything. Just think they don’t want _us_ here.” He nodded toward the house. “They ain’t tryin’ to get in. They ain’t gonna get in.” He scanned the herd again. “Let’s get back inside.”

“We have to get out of here. We have to find the rest of the group,” Carol insisted.

“We will. They know where we are. They’re probably close, layin’ low to see if the herd leaves. They got weapons.”

“If they got to them in time.” Carol shivered and turned to walk back into the house. Daryl followed right behind her. He shut the door quietly, and he moved into the living room to add some wood to the fire.

The ceiling creaked overhead, and Carol braced for the girls to come downstairs. She wasn’t sure what to say to them, and the thought occurred to her that Lydia was already traumatized enough. Having a bunch of walkers and freaks wearing skin masks was a whole other level of fucked up, even in this horrible new world.

“Girls are up,” Daryl muttered. “I’m gonna keep tryin’ on the walkie.”

“We should save the battery. Who knows where they are? They could be anywhere, Daryl. They could be dead.” Daryl stared at her for a moment, ready to argue, but he knew she was right. It was possible these people intended to wait them out. After all, how long could a man, a pregnant woman and two children survive behind these gates with limited supplies? It seemed these people had the advantage. They disguised themselves as the dead to walk amongst them, and they didn’t seem to have any goal in mind other than to kill anybody they came across. It was as if trying to find safety and stability and a new life in a dead world was offensive to them.

“Alright. We best eat somethin’.”

“Mmm. I’ll find something to put together,” Carol assured him.

“Mom!” Carol jumped at Sophia’s shout, but when the girl came rushing down the stairs with wide eyes, she knew she’d seen the herd outside the gates. “Walkers!”

“Shh! I know,” Carol whispered. “Don’t say anything to Lydia. She’s scared enough as it is.” Carol looked up at the top of the stairs and then back to Sophia. “Where is she?”

“She’s still asleep.”

“Do me a favor,” Carol urged. “Go up there and make sure the curtains are closed. I’ll go fix breakfast. As soon as Lydia stirs, help her brush her teeth and comb her hair. Keep her occupied, and whatever you do, don’t let her look outside, alright?” Sophia looked to Daryl who gave her a little nod.

“We should call Mr. Grimes.”

“Honey,” Carol said quietly, “something happened back home.”

“What? Is Carl ok? Duane?”

“I don’t…I don’t know.” Carol looked down at Sophia’s lower lip trembled. “We heard from them late last night. Something bad happened, and we don’t know who survived. But we can’t think about that right now. We have to keep ourselves safe here until we figure out our next plan.”

“I wanna go. Let’s just go. Please,” Sophia begged.

“Honey, we can’t. It’s not safe.”

“They’re just walkers. We can put walkers down. And we can…we can go.”

“It’s not that simple, Soph,” Daryl spoked up. “It ain’t just walkers out there. There’s people out there. They’re wearin’ walker skins, blendin’ in.” Sophia’s eyes widened.

“They could get in!”

“They’re not trying,” Carol pointed out. “Whatever we decide to do, we’re not doing anything right now. Who knows how many more of them are in the woods waiting for us to go around the back? If we do anything, it’ll be at night.”

“Your mama’s right,” Daryl agreed. “It’s best we lay low inside, keep the house locked up tight. Tonight, we’ll see if maybe we can’t make a move. But we gotta be smart about it, alright? We gotta be quiet and quick if we do anything.”

A cold draft blew through the room, and Carol shivered, turning to see the front door wide open. Her heart dropped in that moment, and she reached for Daryl’s arm.

“Lydia,” she gasped. She went running toward the door with Daryl right behind her. Sophia started after them, and moments later, they were out on the porch watching Lydia hurrying through the snow toward the gates. “Lydia!”

“Mom!” Sophia cried out. “She’s gonna get bit!”

“Stay here!” Carol yelled, already halfway down the porch steps with Daryl following right behind her.

“Wait!” he urged.

“Lydia! Lydia, stop!” Carol cried. “Lydia!”

The little girl stopped just inches from the grasp of the walkers pressed up against the gate. She stood there, stock still aside from her little shoulders moving up and down with her rapid, gaspy breaths. Carol slipped on the ice just feet behind the girl but caught her balance before she could fall. She reached out then as the little girl reached out toward one of the outstretched hands.

“Lydia,” she whispered. “Take a step back toward me.” The child whimpered, and whispers rose up from the raspy snarls.

_“Lydia.”_

_“Kill the girl.”_

_“Finish it.”_

“Lydia,” Carol choked out, her voice louder now, breaking through the snarls and whispers. “Lydia, look at me!” The little girl’s fingertips brushed the scratched hand that reached out toward her. Carol reached out then, grabbing the child and pulling her back just a little. The girl whimpered.

“Alpha,” she cried. “Alpha. Alpha.” Carol knelt in the snow behind the girl, her gaze zeroing in on the figure Lydia was crying for. The gashes on the arms and chest were clearly stab wounds and not defensive ones either. The woman had been brutally attacked. Curiously, a ripped flesh mask hung from her head, and as she pressed further into the gate, it tore, revealing a shaved head and dark-dead eyes underneath. The figure snarled and stared ahead, eyes focusing, unflinching on the little girl as if remembering something from a previous life. It was impossible, Carol knew, but Lydia knew this monster. “Alpha. Alpha.”

“It’s ok, sweetheart. You’re safe,” Carol whispered, as the little girl struggled against her. She held her arms firmly around the child, and Lydia scratched and pushed at her, trying to get away. “It’s ok. It’s ok.”

“Alpha!” Lydia screamed. Daryl knelt down in the snow next to Carol and Lydia. He put his hand on Carol’s back, and in that moment, Lydia stopped struggling. Instead, she started thrusting her fists against her head, crying out and working the walkers up into a frenzy.

_“Lydia. It’s your turn.”_

_“Join the Alpha.”_

_“She was weak. You made her weak.”_

“Mommy!” Lydia cried out. “Mommy!” Carol held the girl’s arms down and hugged her tightly, keeping her safe from herself, and the child finally crumpled and turned to bury her face against Carol’s neck.

“Get her inside,” Carol whispered. She started to pass Lydia off to Daryl, but as he stood, his foot caught a patch of ice. He slid enough that the walker Lydia had become fixated on could grab the back of his shirt. He let out a strangled cry, and Carol’s heart sank. Everything felt like it was moving in slow motion for a moment, and as the other hands reached through the gate at him, grasping at his skin and clothes and hair, Carol stood, pushing Lydia back behind her. “Turn around. Cover your ears. Close your eyes!” Lydia sobbed, and Carol reached for the gun in her boot. She shot at the walker with a fist full of Daryl’s hair. The hand relaxed, and the walker slumped forward on the gate. Daryl used his knife and stuck it through the skull of another walker that had a hold on his shirt. Carol saw Lydia turn and look away as she put the barrel of the gun against Alpha’s head and pulled the trigger. For half a moment, those dead eyes almost came alive, a glimmer of surprise, a flash of a life that died a long time ago fading as the bullet passed through the skull and into the shoulder of the walker right behind. Blood poured out of the wound and down into the white snow, and Daryl pulled back, scrambling up and away from the gate.

“Fuck,” he panted.

“Are you hurt?” Carol choked out, quickly examining him for scratches or bites.

“I’m ok. Ain’t no blood,” he promised. Carol let out a heavy sigh of relief, and quickly scooped Lydia up into her arms. The child had turned around again and was staring at her dead mother’s corpse as blood continued to pool out into the snow.

“Don’t look, sweetheart,” Carol choked out.

“Mommy,” Lydia choked out. “Mommy.”

“I’m so sorry, Lydia. I’m so sorry.” Lydia stopped fighting and pulled her arms around Carol’s neck, burying her cries against her neck. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.” She rubbed circles along the child’s back, and Carol looked pleadingly at Daryl.

“What are we gonna do?”

_“We want the girl.”_

_“Lydia.”_

_“Give us the girl.”_

The whispers rose up again, and Carol stumbled backward with Lydia in her arms. She took another shot into the herd, this time hearing a pained cry rise up.

“You know what’s good for ya, you’ll leave. Otherwise, you’ll just end up another body on the gate!” Daryl warned. Lydia cried harder in Carol’s arms, and Daryl nodded for her to turn. “Let’s get back inside.”

Sophia met them halfway, tears streaking down her face. She nearly toppled Daryl over when she ran into him, and he pulled one arm around her.

“It’s ok. It’s ok.”

“What happened?” Sophia asked. Carol shook her head and nodded to Lydia. Sophia’s lower lip trembled again, and Daryl wiped a tear from the girl’s cheek.

“C’mon. Let’s get inside ‘fore we all catch our death from the cold.”

_Author’s Note: What’s this?! A Fervor update? Yeah, I can’t believe it either. Please let me know what your thoughts on the chapter._


	48. Chapter 48

Forty-Eight

“You ok?” Rick handed Lori a granola bar as they huddled inside a cold, drafty house. She nodded her thanks at him and blinked back tears. “Carl?” Carl looked up from where he was seated with Duane. “Carl, get your mom another blanket from the closet.”

“I’m fine,” Lori insisted.

“You’re not fine,” Rick pointed out. “You’re shaking.”

“It’s adrenaline,” she sniffled. “Everything happened so fast.”

“I know,” he said quietly. He lowered his voice so only she could hear. “I know you lost something back there.” Lori’s head snapped up, and Rick shook his head. “I’m not trying to start something. I know he kept you safe. I know he kept Carl safe. And I’m sorry. I’m sorry for how everything went down.” Lori let out a slow, shaking breath, and she shook her head.

“I didn’t love him. I thought, maybe once, that I might have, but I think I just felt grateful he got as far as he did. But everything else…” She shook her head. “There were feelings there. I will say that. But at the end of the day, _you_ are the man I married. _You_ are the man I love.” She took his hand in hers. “We’ll go on.”

“We will,” Rick agreed.

“I’m worried about Glenn. He’s not talking. Not eating.”

“I’ll talk to him,” Rick said quietly. Lori shook her head.

“Nobody’s gonna reach him right now. Not after what he’s lost.” Lori pulled her arm through Rick’s and leaned against him, resting her head against his shoulder. “He’ll need time.” Carl came walking over with a heavy blanket from the closet, and he fanned it out over his mom’s lap. She smiled up at him tiredly. She marveled at the way her son had grown since everything happened. He was still so young but trying to find his way in this world, trying to figure out who he was and what his place was in the scheme of things.

Lori watched her boy join Duane on the floor again across the room, and she sighed heavily, closing her eyes as she looked around at their now smaller group. Everyone was tired. Everyone was quiet and unsure of what to say or do for those who were grieving. Glenn sat alone by the frosty window, his gazed fixed on something, anything out there to try to keep his mind off of losing Maggie and Hershel.

Lori hadn’t seen it happen. She’d heard the scream, and she’d seen Hershel dragging Glenn away as walkers swarmed. They hadn’t been fast enough. Hershel had gone down next, and Glenn had barely made it away without a scratch. And it wasn’t just Shane, Glenn and Hershel. T-Dog had thrown himself between Carl and a cluster of walkers, and while he’d almost gotten away, too, one came around the corner and tore a chunk away from the back of his neck. Tara and Sasha were gone. It felt surreal. Both groups had never felt more united than they did in this moment, gathered around the cold, dusty living room of an abandoned house. They’d all lost friends that day, and while some were too in shock to process what had happened, others were quiet; stunned into silence.

From the back of the house came Merle and then Negan. Merle taped the steel of his prosthetic against the windowsill, and everybody turned to look at him.

“Alright, it looks like we’re gonna be stuck here for a little bit. Now, Daryl, Carol and the kid are holed up in that big old house not far from Claypool. Batteries went dead on the walkies hours ago, and we still ain’t found any with enough juice to get a call out.”

“I’m gonna go check out that old house. If Carol and Daryl are there, if things are safe, we can bring the rest of the group there to stay ‘til we catch our breaths. Merle’s coming with. Anybody else?” He watched everyone in the group. Some of them barely flinched. Some of them looked up with exhausted stares, some of them looked too drained to move. “Rick?” Rick looked to Lori, and she gave his hand a squeeze.

“It’s ok. We’re safe here,” Lori promised. “You go on ahead and find Carol and Daryl.”

“I’d go, but I’d slow everyone down,” Aaron pointed out, gesturing to his injured ankle. He’d tripped over Tara’s body on the way out of Claypool, but nobody was about to mention that. Everybody could still hear her screams echoing in their heads.

“Thanks all the same, but you’re good with a gun, and I want one of my guys here just in case shit goes down. No offense to your group, Rick. I just know what I know about my people, and I’d trust Aaron’s shot in a heartbeat if things went up shit creek in a split second.”

“Understood,” Rick nodded. “Glenn?” Glenn looked up from where he sat against the wall. “You got this?”

“Yeah,” Glenn croaked out, rubbing his tired face. “I won’t let you down.” Rick got up and walked over to clap him on the shoulder.

“We won’t be long. I know what you lost, but we have to be ready for anything. Maggie would want that.”

“Don’t.” Glenn shook his head. “I’ll be ready. I promise.” Rick nodded again. He turned to Carl.

“We’ll try to be back before dark. If things are safe at the house, it’ll be sooner.”

“I’ll take first watch,” Carl offered. Rick beamed in pride at his son. He flicked the brim of his old sheriff’s hat he’d given to Carl months ago. He turned to Negan then and nodded.

“We should go while we still have the light,” Merle spoke up. “Ya’ll stay in the house. Anything goes sideways, there’s another house half a mile from here. We scouted it a few weeks ago. It was safe then, but who knows now?” He glanced at Andrea. “How’s your ankle?”

“Let’s just say it’s a good thing I’m a good shot, because my ankle will slow me down if we have to run.”

“You be safe.” Merle reached into his back pocket and handed her a pocket knife. “Ain’t much, but it might do some good if the goin’ gets rough.”

“Thanks,” Andrea nodded, taking the pearl-handled blade into her palm. “I’ll hold onto it ‘til you get back.”

“Nah, you keep it. Fits you better anyway.” Andrea chuckled at that, and Merle winked.

“Can I go?” Duane stood up and looked at Merle. Merle shook his head at the boy.

“Sorry, son. Three’s more’n enough,” Merle pointed out. “Besides, you still got some learnin’ to do. You’re a good shot, but you still got a ways to go. Promise I’ll work with ya when we’re back, ok? Just stay put.”

“Sophia’s my friend. What if they’re in trouble?”

“If you wanna help Sophia, stay here,” Carl insisted. “Besides, she’s with Daryl and her mom. I’m sure they’re safe. We’ll probably all be having dinner together tonight. Right, Dad?” Carl asked, looking to Rick. Rick swallowed hard but nodded, his mouth set in a firm line.

“That’s right. They’ve probably fixin’ to start cookin’ supper over the fire right now. Sit tight, Duane. Like Merle said, everybody stay in. But be _ready_.”

*~*~*~*~*~*

The herd was still outside the gates, the temperature had dropped at least ten degrees, and snow clouds loomed to the west. Carol had found packets of instant cider in the cupboard above the refrigerator, and she’d made four hot mugs of it while Daryl tossed a couple more logs into the fireplace.

Sophia and Lydia sat on the couch under a blanket, and Lydia stared at the fireplace, watching the ash glow when Daryl used the poker to move the logs around. When Carol brough the last two mugs of steaming cider into the room and placed them on the coffee table, Lydia looked up at her.

“Give it a few minutes to cool down. It’s really hot,” Carol warned. She handed Sophia and Lydia each a stale gingerbread cookie. Lydia looked down at it and looked at Sophia before turning her attention back to Carol.

Carol knelt down by the couch and put her hands on the couch cushion.

“I’m sorry you had to see that, Lydia,” Carol said softly. “I’m sorry about your mom.” Lydia looked down, her little shoulders slumping as her messy, dark hair fell into her face. “Those people? You know those people?” Lydia’s little lip poked out, and she sniffled. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. We won’t let them hurt you.” Carol looked to Daryl, and he gave her a little nod.

There was a good chance they were never going to know Lydia’s full story. She was so young, and the most that they knew about her was that the woman she called Alpha, the woman she called mommy was dead, and her corpse was lying out in the drive at the gate.

The most Carol could deduce from these truths were that Lydia and her mother were part of these Whisperers, and the child had either escaped, been left to fend for herself, or her mother had sent her away for her safety. Whatever the case was, the child had definitely been abused, and it broke Carol’s heart that the poor kid had been traumatized further today. But they were safe. They were together. That was what they had to focus on.

“You two sit here and keep warm,” Carol said quietly. “Daryl and I will be right back, ok?” Sophia nodded, and she reached for her cider.

“We’ll be ok,” she promised. Carol nodded then and she stood, catching Daryl’s eye as she walked past. She nodded for him to follow her. He tossed another log into the fire, got up, brushed his hands on the sides of his jeans and followed her to the bathroom down the hall.

“Somethin’ wrong?” he asked, as he followed Carol in and closed the door behind them.

“Sit down,” she said, putting the lid down on the toilet.

“What’s goin’ on?”

“I want to check you for scratches,” she insisted. Daryl sighed heavily. He wasn’t going to argue. He was sure he was fine, but he knew she’d only feel better if she gave him a once over for good measure.

“I’m fine. More worried about you,” he murmured as she started combing her fingers through his hair. “You slipped out there.”

“I’m fine,” she assured him.

“Might better have myself a look for myself.” He reached for her waist, and she swatted his hands away. He smirked at her, and she grinned down at him.

“I don’t see any blood.”

“Course not.”

“Lean forward.”

“Yes ma’am,” he huffed, arching his neck so she could check the back of his neck. She gave a short nod, satisfied, and she tapped on his shoulder to let him know he could straighten up.

“Satisfied?”

“Yeah.” She sat down on the edge of the bathtub, and she ran her fingers through her hair. “I’m going crazy wondering what happened back home.”

“I know. We’ll figure out a way outta this. We’ll find the right moment, and we’ll get the hell outta here.”

“And go where? We don’t even know what’s left of Claypool. We don’t know _who’s_ left.” She took a deep breath and winced when a pain shot through her lower belly. She gasped and lurched forward, and Daryl caught her arms before she could fall over.

“Whoa. Hey, you ok?” She nodded.

“Yeah. Yeah, just too much excitement, I guess.” She took a deep breath, and Daryl helped her stand.

“C’mon. Let’s go back in the living room. Get you settled down.” He reached down and placed his hand against her belly, and she put her hand over his.

“I’m ok. We’re ok.” She took a couple more deep breaths and offered him a tired smile.

“Want you to rest today. Tonight, I’m gonna take watch up in the attic. Got windows on all sides, so I can see if anybody’s comin’. Might even see a way out around all this shit.” Carol nodded. “We’re gonna get home. You, me, Sophia, Lydia. We’re all gonna be just fine.” He kissed her softly.

“You’re right. I know you’re right. I’m just…so tired.”

“Me too. C’mon. Let’s go back out. You lay down for a little bit. I’ll look after the girls.”

“I love you,” she whispered. “Have I told you that lately?”

“Mmm, never hurts to hear it again,” he murmured before kissing her again. She wrapped her arms around him and rested her head on his shoulder.

“When all this is over, I want a trip to the Bahamas and a three-hour-long massage.” She cricked her neck. “Maybe a visit to the chiropractor.” Daryl snorted at that, and Carol let out a little chuckle.

“Day drinkin’ on the beach, a soak in the hot tub and some burgers on the grill.”

“Ooh, now you’re talking,” Carol sighed.

“C’mon,” he urged, taking her by the hand. “I want ya off your feet today as much as possible. We’re gonna rest today. If things don’t change by tomorrow, we’ll fight our way out and never look back.” Carol nodded then.

“Ok,” she agreed. “We do what we have to. We’ll be ok.” She tried her best to sound confident, and she squeezed his hand. Whatever happened, they were going to get through it together.


	49. Chapter 49

Forty-Nine

“What are you doin’ up here?” Daryl’s voice was clenched and hoarse when he stretched. He’d been sitting in the camp chair looking out over the field toward home, or where home used to be, for the past hour and a half. It was a new moon in a cloud-filled sky, so the night was pitch black with not even the stars to light the way.

“Thought you might like some company. The girls are sleeping,” Carol said quietly, huffing as she tossed a couple of blankets in his lap. She scooted another chair up next to his, and he tugged a blanket across his lap, unfolding the other one to drape over hers.

“It’s too cold up here. You should go back down and sleep by the fire.”

“I’m ok for now,” Carol promised. “Have you seen anything?”

“Nah. Saw a couple walkers in the field before the light faded, but no headlights. No house lights. Just darkness everywhere.” Carol nodded and pulled the blanket up over her shoulders, rubbing her hands together. Her breath left her lips in a little cloud, and Daryl leaned forward to smear his hand through the misty condensation on the window.

“You can’t stay up here all night. You’ll freeze to death.”

“Been out in the elements in worse than this,” Daryl reminded her. “I ever tell you how I got lost in the woods when I was a kid?”

“I recall Andrea telling me something about your itchy ass,” Carol teased. Daryl smirked, and Carol reached over to squeeze his thigh. When she pulled back, she bowed her head for a moment. “I hope she’s ok. I want them _all_ to be ok.” Daryl reached out and curled his fingers around hers. Carol let out a little groan, and she leaned her head back against the chair. “Tell me a story.”

“What kinda story?” Daryl asked.

“I don’t know. Anything to keep my mind off of everything.” Daryl leaned down and grabbed the oil lamp he’d brought up with him. He adjusted the wick to give them more light and placed it back down. “Tell me about you and Merle.”

“Shit. Me and Merle?” Daryl asked. “There’s all kinds of stories I could tell.”

“Well, tell me a good one. A happy one.”

“Happy,” Daryl grunted. “Merle and happy don’t exactly go hand in hand.”

“There’s got to be something. Something from when you were kids.” Daryl relaxed in his chair and thought for a moment.

“I remember back before mom died. Dad was off on a weekend bender, and mom had friends over. Merle, bein’ the big brother, offered to get me out from under foot. He knew her longer, so he knew how to say things just the right way to get his way. I was ‘bout seven, and he was a lot older’n me. He told her he’d take me out campin’ in the woods behind our house. She didn’t like the idea, but he promised we wouldn’t be far. He promised he’d look after me, and she knew he wasn’t gonna give up ‘til she said yes, so she agreed. Well, I didn’t wanna go, ‘cause Merle was already an asshole, even back then. I told her I wanted to stay home, and she said it’d be good for me to get outta the house for a little bit. Well, I went, and Merle told me we was gonna run away.”

“You’re kidding.”

“Wish I was,” he chuckled. “Merle went and stole a canoe from the neighbors, and he hid it in the woods. There was a river cuttin’ through the woods about a mile in, and Merle said we was gonna take the river all the way to California. ‘Course, we were dumb kids that didn’t pay attention in school, ‘cause there was no way that river was takin’ us to California.” Carol couldn’t help the smile that spread across her face as Daryl relived the memory with a gleam in his eye.

“Did you make it to the river?”

“Oh, yeah. We made it to the river. See, Merle had swiped some lunch meat and bread outta the fridge, ‘cause apparently he thought we was gonna live on that all the way to California. I was hungry ‘bout halfway to the river, so we stopped and ate, and I asked him if we were really runnin’ away. He said we was gonna be just like Huck Finn, ridin’ the river. See, Merle didn’t like school much, but he liked that story. Anyway, he kept talkin’ about how he was gonna get a job and build a house and take care of us. All I wanted was to go home and play with my toys. But he was my big brother, and the idea of runnin’ away from home didn’t really sound all that bad. ‘Course, he made me help him lug the canoe all the way there, and by the time we got there, I was tired and wanted to go to bed. But we got out on that river, and we just started floatin’. It was dark, and the lightnin’ bugs were out, and the moon was so full and so high. Seemed like a dream, ya know?”

“You got caught.”

“Yeah,” Daryl snorted. “Neighbors reported their canoe stolen, and mom just knew it was Merle. Didn’t take but a couple hours for them to come out lookin’. We got stopped in the next county. Merle’s ass went to juvie for a few weeks, and well, when my daddy got done with me, I wished we had made it all the way to California.” Carol squeezed his hand. “Even though we got caught and got our hides tanned, it’s gotta be my favorite memory from when we was kids. Even then, he was an asshole, but he was still my brother, and he always had a way of makin’ bad ideas sound like good ones.” A little smile tugged at the corner of Carol’s mouth. “We were just stupid kids, but when I got older, I spent a lot of nights sleepin’ on the banks of that river, watchin’ the lightnin’ bugs light up on the water. Kinda turned it into my own hidin’ place, you know? For when things got bad.”

“I’m glad you had that,” Carol whispered softly, reaching out to stroke his cheek.

“Yeah. Me too. You have anything like that? A safe place?”

“Hmm.” Carol shrugged one shoulder. “There was a park I’d take Sophia to. It had trails and a duck pond, and sometimes I’d take her for a walk there, and I’d think about just disappearing with her on one of those trails. Leave little scraps of fabric behind that could link us there. Make it look like we were taken so we could just run away and never look back.”

“But ya never did.”

“No,” she said quietly. “I went to a women’s shelter a few times. I was determined to leave Ed. I’d tell him I was taking Sophia to visit a cousin, and while he didn’t like the idea of me going anywhere he couldn’t keep an eye on me, he used that time to entertain himself with a girl from the office.” She rolled her eyes. “The thing was, he had me so convinced that he’d kill me if he ever found out that I was too afraid to follow through with it. I kept going back. And I don’t know why. I guess looking back now, it’s easy to ask those questions, but when I was really living in it, I felt like I was in a nightmare. There was no good outcome, you know? Behind Door A was Ed and his abuse. Behind Door B was living on the run only to be hunted down like a dog.” She shook her head. “I never wished death harder one any person in my entire life than I did on Ed Peletier.” She shivered. “I’m even a little mad that I still have his name.”

“Ya don’t have to,” he said quietly. “The world ended, remember? We get to start over.” He entangled his fingers with hers. “Don’t gotta have a last name. I mean, everybody knew Cher as just…Cher. Madonna. Uh…Oprah.” Carol snorted out a laugh, and he laughed too. It was her favorite sound, his laugh. “You could have my name. If you want it.” He hunched his shoulders for a moment, a little insecure, a little shaken by his own words. But, Carol’s eyes glimmered with tears, and she took a shaking breath and let out a little chuckle.

“I’d be honored,” she whispered. Daryl looked up to meet her gaze, and he watched as she leaned in to press a kiss to his lips. And it suddenly occurred to him that he might have just gotten engaged or married or something, but he wasn’t about to open his mouth to clarify and look like a damn fool. He’d made her smile, and that was really all he cared about.

Carol gasped softly just as she pulled back from the kiss, and for a moment he wondered if she’d had another pain.

“You ok?”

“Did you see that?” She pointed out the window. Daryl gazed out the window and into the darkness.

“What’d you see?”

“A flash of light. Really quick, but it was there.”

“Headlights?”

“No. No, it came from the field. It was quick. Just a flash.” Moments later, three flashes came in rapid succession.

“Shit. Put the lamp out,” Daryl whispered. Carol leaned over, quickly turning the wick own until the flame went out. Daryl stood up, looking out the window, waiting.

“What’s going on?”

“Next will be five.”

“What?”

“Five flashes.” Sure enough, moments later, five flashes came, this time a little closer to the fence. Daryl reached into his pack, fumbled around for a flashlight. When he finally found it, he waited.

“Daryl?”

“Wait,” he urged. “It’ll be one flash.” Sure enough, one more flash. Daryl quickly flashed one flash out the window, waited a few seconds and flashed three more. Moments later, the flashlight lit up, and the light traveled in a quick circular motion before dying out. Daryl flashed his light one more time and threw his pack over his shoulder.

“Daryl? What…”

“It’s Merle. It’s a game we used to play as kids.” He nearly tripped over his chair trying to turn around. “When mom and dad were fighting, I’d be scared shitless, so Merle made up this flashlight game. It was our way of talking but staying quiet, and it took my mind off of the fightin’. We used it when we’d go huntin’ too.”

“You think that’s Merle?”

“It’s gotta be.” He took her hand and led her out of the attic and down the stairs. The made their way down to the dark downstairs foyer, and Daryl grabbed his coat from the closet. Carol shivered as Daryl slung his crossbow over his shoulder. “Wait here. Gonna go see what’s goin’ on.”

“Daryl, be careful. It could be a trick. Those people are still out there,” she whispered.

“I’ll be careful. Wait here. Lock the door behind me.” Carol swallowed hard and followed Daryl down the hall and into the kitchen. He unlocked the back door, but before he left, he turned and pulled her into his arms. He kissed her then, almost taking her breath away. And when he pulled back, he ran his thumb across her lower lip. “I love you.”

“I love you,” she whispered. He turned then and was gone a moment later, rushing out through the snow toward the back fence. Carol shut the door and locked it, and she watched him walk away until the darkness swallowed him up. She waited, barely breathing as her heart hammered in her chest and she waited for his return.


	50. Chapter 50

Fifty

Carol went around making sure all of the curtains were closed before she lit the match and tossed it into the fireplace. In moments, a warm glow filled the room, as everyone sat around with hot mugs of coffee in their chilled hands.

“You drive here or walk?” Daryl asked.

“Parked the car a half mile down the road,” Merle grunted. “Hope it’s still there when we go back for it. Saw you had yourself a walker problem. Knew there was no fightin’ ‘em tonight. It’s black as tar out there, and I’m willin’ to bet my good arm those freaks that attacked us are all cozied up with ‘em out there.” Negan groaned from his seat, nearly choking on his coffee as a twinge of pain shot through his arm.

“Shit,” he spat out, putting his mug aside.

“You alright, boss?” Merle asked.

“Yeah. Yeah, just took a hard hit coming over that fence.”

“Let me have a look,” Carol offered.

“I’m fine. Just banged it up is all.”

“Let her have a look,” Rick urged.

“You know something about hurt shoulders?”

“I know a few things. I know a dislocated one when I see it. The way you’re sitting? The way you’re slumping like that? I can pop it back in.” Negan looked at Daryl for a moment. Daryl nodded his head.

“Should’ve held onto that ladder comin’ down.”

“Yeah, well, it was slick as shit with all the snow coming down. Aw, fuck,” Negan grunted. “Fine. Fine. At this point, I’d rather lop the whole thing off than sit here like this.” He shrugged off his leather jacket, and Carol got up to go around to his other side. She slowly slid the sleeve down his arm, and he winced when she put her hand against the back of his shoulder.

“This ever happened before?” Carol asked.

“No. Never.”

“You only fell a few feet.”

“Well, I landed on a fucking concrete block. I don’t think there’s a way to land safely on one of those. Are you going to sit here and play twenty questions, or are you going to pop my fucking shoulder back in pla—” He let out a yell when Carol expertly popped his shoulder back in place. He opened his eyes in surprise when most of the pain went away, and he blinked up at her. “You’re good.”

“I know,” she said with a little smirk. She came back to sit next to Daryl on the couch, while Negan slowly leaned back with his coffee mug and took a comforting sip. “Alright, somebody needs to start talking.” She looked to Rick. “What happened?”

“We were ambushed,” he admitted, putting his coffee mug down and leaning forward, wringing his hands together.

“By the Whisperers?” Carol asked. Rick looked to Negan.

“Whisperers. Yeah,” Negan nodded. “They walked right up to Claypool like fuckin’ Buffalo Bill in his lady suit and took a big shit all over our humble abode. The best we can figure is they came over the south wall while Glenn was on watch. At least two came over. One was killed, and they let him turn. When Glenn went to check out the noise, the gates were opened and here we are.”

“It’s kind of a blur,” Rick said quietly. “Glenn called for help, but at that point, there were two dozen of those things walking around. We were fighting them off, putting walkers down left and right, and then all of a sudden, they were fighting back. That’s when we knew what was happening. We thought we got them all.”

“You didn’t,” Daryl muttered. “There’s more outside the gates. Don’t know how many, but they’re out there.”

“The place was overrun,” Merle explained. “The more commotion we made, the more walkers came from everywhere. We got to the cars and got the hell out. ‘Course we lost a few along the way.”

“Who?” Carol asked, sitting up straight, white knuckling the couch cushion. She looked half sick, and Rick squeezed the bridge of his nose between this thumb and forefinger.

“We lost T-Dog. Hershel and Maggie. Shane.” Carol’s shoulders slumped as it hit her that Glenn lost two very important people to him, and it happened while he was on watch. She couldn’t imagine the kind of pain he was going through. And T-Dog and Shane. She looked to Daryl. T-Dog had become such a good friend and valued member of the group. It felt wrong that he was gone. He’d been one of her favorites, right from the start at the quarry. He’d always been kind and offered her a smile in the morning. Then there was Shane. The weight of his loss wasn’t lost on her. He was Rick’s partner once. His best friend. And everyone knew what he’d done for Lori and Carl, getting them out of Atlanta. While he wasn’t one of Carol’s favorite people, she recognized that the group had lost another valuable asset. None of it felt real.

“We lost Sasha and Tara,” Negan said grimly. “It’s a fucking shame. They were warriors. Sasha was focused. The most focused goddamn person I ever met. She took losing her brother and channeled that anger and pain into just…surviving. And Tara…”

“She was a good girl,” Merle said quietly. “Didn’t take shit from anybody. Especially me. I respected that. Damn fine lady, she was.” He took a sip of his coffee and cleared his throat. “But there ain’t no use in sittin’ around cryin’ when we got a big goddamn problem just outside the gates. We got a house full of people who are waitin’ for us to get back. We got a bunch of freaks outside rubbin’ elbows with the dead. We gotta make a game plan and get our group together so we can get the fuck outta dodge.”

“Merle’s right,” Rick said, much to Merle’s surprise. “There’ll be time to mourn later. Right now, we have to get everyone someplace safe. We need to get past these people, whoever the hell they are, and we need to put as much distance between us and them as we can.”

“I say we take ‘em all out, make sure there ain’t none left to follow,” Merle urged.

“You think that’s all of ‘em out there?” Daryl asked. “No way. They split up. Some of ‘em at Claypool. Some of ‘em here. Who’s to say there ain’t more out there in the woods waitin’ for us? We could be sittin’ here like fish in a goddamn barrel. I say tomorrow we take down as many as we can, get the hell outta here and find more supplies, more ammo. That way if they come after us, we’ll be prepared.”

“I like the way you think, little Dixon,” Negan smirked.

“Name’s Daryl, jackass,” Daryl muttered. Negan grinned at him and sat back for a moment before sucking his teeth. “Daryl’s plan sounds good to me. Should we vote?”

“It’s the only plan,” Rick admitted. “Somebody needs to get back to the rest of the group, let them know what’s going on. We can bring reinforcements tomorrow, take down every last one of them if we have to.”

“I’ll go back,” Merle volunteered. “Somebody just help me over the damn fence so I don’t fall and break a nail like the boss here.”

“If my shoulder wouldn’t pop out of place again, I’d lay out on your ass, Dixon.”

“Ooh, don’t make promises you don’t plan on makin’ good on,” Merle croaked with a wink.

“Jesus,” Daryl muttered, rubbing his temples. “Merle, you gonna be alright gettin’ back?”

“Who the hell you think you’re talkin’ to little brother? I’ll see ya’ll tomorrow, first thing after sunrise. We’ll be there, guns blazin’.”

“Don’t do anything stupid,” Rick warned. Merle snorted, took one last sip of his coffee and put the mug down.

“Thanks for the hospitality,” Merle said with a nod in Carol’s direction. He looked to Daryl. “We’ll see ya’ll tomorrow. Can’t call first. Walkie’s are as cold as them walkers out there.”

“There’s some batteries in the kitchen you can have,” Carol piped up.

“Somethin’ I need to tell ya’ll first,” Daryl said quietly. “Little girl we found? Her name’s Lydia. Turns out, she was with the Whisperers. Don’t know how long, don’t know much. Her mama was in the herd this mornin’. She was a Whisperer. But she was dead. Maybe they killed her. Maybe she was bit. Maybe both. Don’t know. But they’re out there callin’ to her. They want her.”

“Guess they’ll just have to settle for a consolation prize,” Negan said with a shrug, pulling his gun from his belt. He checked to make sure it was loaded before sticking it back into the holster. “We’ll do what we can to help you keep the girl safe.”

“Thanks,” Daryl said with a nod. “Appreciate it.” Negan nodded, and when Daryl reached out to shake his hand, he accepted it. He patted him on the back, and he turned to Rick.

“You go on back with him,” Negan urged. “I’m not going over anymore fences in the dark. You’ve got a family waiting on you back home. Go on.” He nodded toward Merle. Rick looked to Daryl, and Daryl held a hand up.

“We’re fine here. Besides, I’d feel better with two goin’ out there instead of one. Gotta have somebody to back you up.”

“Alright,” Rick agreed. “But we’ll be here first thing in the morning. Everybody be ready.”

“You don’t have to tell us twice,” Carol said with a sure nod. “Be safe.”

“You too,” Rick urged.

“C’mon. I’ll get ya those batteries before ya head out. We’re gonna need ‘em come tomorrow.”

*~*~*~*~*~*

“What in the serial killer hell is this?” Negan asked, glee dripping from his voice as he rifled through the downstairs coat closet. Daryl stepped into the room after having checked all of the locks once again. Carol tossed a quilt onto the couch for Negan and looked over to see what he was talking about.

“You find somethin’?” Daryl asked.

“Where have you been all my life? I swear this is the most beautiful piece of equipment I’ve _ever_ seen.” He rifled around a moment longer before coming back out from behind all of the coats and random junk piled inside. He lifted his new prize up for Carol and Daryl to see. It was a standard, wooden baseball bat, only it was no ordinary bat. It was wrapped in sharp barbed wire, and Negan’s eyes gleamed as he smiled up at it. “Holy shit. Now _this_ is the kind of shit to pack in the apocalypse. Imagine how many growlers you could take out with just one quick _swish_.” He swung the bat, and Carol took a step back.

“Okay, why the hell would anybody need a baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire?” Carol asked. Daryl looked around the place.

“It’s an old house. Big house. Maybe it was just insurance in case their fancy security system failed.”

“Well, a lot of good it did them,” Carol muttered, fanning the blanket out, stirring dust up as it settled onto the couch cushions.

“I think I’m gonna sleep better with this pretty gal propped up beside me,” he sighed. He looked at Carol and Daryl. “You don’t mind if I keep this, do you? I mean, I realize I’m a guest here, but this is too fucking perfect.”

“Finders keepers,” Daryl muttered. He gave Carol a glance, and she shrugged one shoulder.

“We’re heading up. You sure you want first watch?”

“I’m _wide_ awake. And kind of hoping I get to try this baby out.” He tapped it against the floor, and Carol grimaced at the sound of barbed wire against the wood floorboards.

“Knock yourself out,” Daryl snorted. He took Carol’s hand. “You call up if you see anything. I mean anything, you understand?”

“Yeah, yeah. I got it.”

“Alright,” Daryl muttered. “Wake me up in four hours. I’ll keep watch the rest of the night.” Negan nodded, and he pulled a chair up in front of the big, picture window. He had the curtains pulled back just enough to see the herd at the gate, but the house was dark enough that he felt confident he couldn’t be spotted. He sat down slowly with a groan and propped his feet up on a dusty footstool.

“You think he’ll be ok down here?” Carol whispered to Daryl.

“Well, good news is, the floors in this place are so damn rickety, we’ll hear him comin’ if somethin’ happens.” Daryl gave Carol’s hand a squeeze, and he nodded for the stairs. “We best get up to bed. Big day tomorrow.”

“Ok,” she murmured. Still, as they climbed the steps up to the second floor, Carol couldn’t help but worry about the present. Tonight. And she knew as soon as she closed her eyes, all she’d be able to think about was Lydia’s hysterical cries, the face of the woman she called Alpha and the memories of the friends she’d lost without getting to say goodbye. Sleep was going to be hard to come by, but she knew she had to try. Tomorrow, as Daryl had said, was going to be a big day.


	51. Chapter 51

Fifty-One

Daryl was on his third cup of coffee when he heard movement upstairs. He let his gaze wander from the herd outside the gates to the couch where Negan was passed out cold. He looked back out the window and took another sip of his coffee. It was getting close to sunrise. A blue haze settled over the ground, and the herd was becoming more visible. Daryl could see at least thirty bodies out there. How many of them were walkers and how many were Whisperers, he couldn’t be certain, but he knew they were going to have to do what they had to in order to get out safely. Getting the group back together was the goal, but his family was everything.

Another creak from upstairs, and Negan sighed and shifted on the couch. Daryl got up and started for the stairs, nearly running into Carol on the landing.

“Everything ok?” Daryl asked hoarsely. She nodded.

“Yeah. The girls are awake. Sophia’s helping Lydia get ready. I got all of our gear packed up and ready.”

“Alright.”

“You hear anything on the walkie?”

“Not yet, but the batteries I gave Rick last night were good. He just might be waitin’ ‘til they get close. Don’t know if one of them out there has a walkie, listenin’ to everything, you know?” He cleared his throat. “You sleep ok?”

“Not really, but I did rest some.” She stood on her tiptoes and gave him a quick kiss. Neither of them wanted to say it aloud, but they were both thinking that there was no guarantee _where_ they’d be sleeping come nightfall. All the planning and work they’d already put into Claypool was all for nothing, and honestly, it was beginning to seem that no place was safe. They’d just keep fighting and running until their luck finally ran out.

“Days like this makes me wanna just get in the car and take off west. Just go someplace where there ain’t no people. No walkers. Just find a place in the desert.”

“Just get in the truck and start driving,” Carol dreamed, placing her hand against Daryl’s arm. “Just go someplace out in the middle of nowhere and live the rest of our lives in peace and quiet.” She pursed her lips together. “Then again, that might get boring after a while.”

“I’ll take boring over this anytime,” Daryl smirked. Static hissed on the walkie downstairs, and Negan practically jumped off the couch and scrambled for it. Carol and Daryl hurried over to meet him.

Static again.

“Five miles out. Be ready at the gate.” The words were quick. Concise. It was clearly Rick speaking, and Negan looked to Daryl and Carol.

“You heard the man. You folks ready?” Carol looked to Daryl and then back to Negan.

“Gotta be. I’ll go get the girls.” Daryl gave her hand a squeeze, and she hurried off toward the stairs.

“Alright,” Negan said quickly, turning to Daryl. “What kinda heat are we packing?”

“Not much,” Daryl admitted. “But we wanna save what we do have. The more noise we make, the more of those sumbitches gonna come outta the woods. We put ‘em down, one at a time if we have to. Save the shootin’ ‘til we’re ready to go through them gates. Walker or Whisperer, they all go down if they get in the way.” Negan glanced over his shoulder at his newfound weapon lying across the coffee table. The gleam in his eye was reminiscent of a kid at Christmas. “You ready?”

“Are you kidding?” Negan asked with a wide grin. He walked over and picked up his new toy, propping it up against one shoulder. “I’ll say one thing. If I died today, at least I’ll go out in style.” Daryl shook his head and huffed out an amused chuckle before heading over to grab his crossbow. Moments later, Carol came down the stairs holding Lydia’s hand, while Sophia came up right behind them.

“Now, when we get outside, I want you two in the car,” she explained.

“I want you three in the car,” Daryl insisted, looking at her. Carol narrowed her eyes at him and put her hands on her hips.

“I can handle myself in a fight. Maybe better than _both_ of you put together.” She quirked an eyebrow, and Negan let out a low laugh.

“Damn, that is _hot_. Confidence in a woman is the sexiest thing. I’m telling you, Daryl, if she wasn’t…” Daryl cleared his throat and gestured toward the kids. “Oh, my apologies, Sophia.” Sophia’s eyes went wide for a minute, and she glanced at her mother. Carol just rolled her eyes, and Negan grinned.

“I can fight, Daryl.”

“I kinda want to see this myself,” Negan remarked, winking at Carol. Daryl blew out a quick breath and looked at her.

“Don’t want ya exertin’ yourself. You didn’t sleep, you ain’t gonna be on your game. If I gotta worry about you, then I ain’t gonna be on _my_ game.” Carol narrowed her eyes at him. If it wasn’t for the fact that she _knew_ he was thinking about her well-being and the baby’s, she’d have half a mind to be pissed at him.

They stared at each other for a moment, and Negan cleared his throat.

“Am I… _missing_ something here?”

“No,” Carol and Daryl bit out at the same time, causing Negan to take a step back.

“Alright. I know a lover’s quarrel when I see one. Sophia? Lydia? How about I escort you lovely ladies to the car?” Lydia took a step behind Carol and hid behind her coat.

“It’s alright, sweetheart,” Carol urged. “You’ll be safe with Sophia.” Lydia whimpered and held to Carol’s coat tighter. Carol went to bend down to look Lydia in the eye, and she suddenly slumped, bringing her hand to her forehead. “Whoa…”

“Hey. Hey.” Daryl made quick work of steadying Carol and bringing her back up to stand. “You good?”

“Mmm, maybe I better sit this one out.” She took a couple of deep breaths, her face paling as Daryl pulled his arm around her waist.

“Mom?” Sophia worried, reaching out to grasp her arm.

“I’m ok, honey. I’m fine. I’m just a little tired.” Daryl glanced at Negan.

“She ain’t had much to eat. Can ya find somethin’ in the kitchen? Crackers or some jerky?”

“Yeah, sure. What, is she knocked up or something?” When Daryl didn’t respond right away and instead glanced at Carol, Negan realized he’d hit the nail on the head. “Well, hot damn. Daryl Junior? Well if that doesn’t make me all warm and fuzzy inside.”

“Negan. Food,” Daryl reminded him.

“Right. On it.” He hurried off to the kitchen only after clicking his tongue and winking on the couple’s direction again.

“Why’s he so weird?” Sophia whispered, glancing up at her mother and Daryl. Daryl said nothing. Instead, he kept his focus on Carol, and when Negan brough the jerky, Carol took a couple of pieces and popped them in her mouth.

“Eat slow. Gonna get you and the girls out to the car, and as soon as Rick’s in sight, we’re gonna get this shit done, alright?” Carol nodded then, and she looked down at Lydia who looked right back up at her with worried eyes.

“Hey, it’s ok. Don’t worry. We’ll be safe, and if you get scared, just close your eyes. I won’t let _anything_ happen to you girls. That’s a promise.” Lydia sniffled but gave a little nod, and Carol smiled tiredly down at her. “I know you don’t know me very well, but I always try to keep my promises. Ok?” The girl nodded again, and Carol squeezed her hand. “Alright, good. Let’s go.”

*~*~*~*~*

The air was rife with the scent of blood and rotting flesh. Daryl and Negan had started picking off the walkers through the gate one at a time. Somewhere in the back, they could spot the skin freaks heading for the hills. And the rasping growls of the dead were so loud that Daryl didn’t hear the gunfire before he saw the bodies dropping left and right. Screams rose up instead of whispers, and when the pickup pulled up with Merle, Glenn and Rick in the back with their guns blazing, a newfound confidence rose up in Daryl, and he started picking off walkers with his crossbow.

Negan was in his element, shoving the barbed wire covered bat into the gaping maws that snapped and growled at him. He’d pull back, and flesh and teeth would go flying. With each walker he took down, he got a little more aggressive, a little more eager for the next and then the next.

“Oh, _shit!”_ Daryl pulled the trigger and sent a bolt through the eye of one walker, and then he stopped to see Glenn pointing at something he wasn’t in a position to see. “Jesus, there’s a whole herd heading this way.”

“Fuck,” Daryl hissed out. “Negan, we gotta _go_.”

“Plan B?” Negan asked.

“What plan B? We ain’t got a Plan B.”

“I _always_ have a plan B,” he growled, snapping the bat down hard against a skull, sending flesh and bone and blood puddling onto the ground. Daryl coughed at the stench that hit them both in the face. Negan gestured at Glenn.

“Get outta here. Get back to the group. We’ll meet you there in ten.”

“Ten? We’re not leaving!” Rick snapped.

“You’re the ones that came with your guns a’blazing! Now we’re up shit creek with half a goddamn paddle! Get back to the group. We’ll be there. Just get the fuck outta here!” Rick looked to Daryl, and Daryl looked to Negan. There wasn’t time to think, but clearly Negan had an idea in mind. At least, he hoped he did, and at this point, it looked like they were fighting a losing battle.

“Go on. We’ll be there!” Daryl hollered. Rick clenched his jaw before thumping on the roof of the truck, urging Aaron to turn the hell around and get gone. The squeal of tire on asphalt was all that Negan needed to turn and start back for the truck. Daryl grabbed him by the back of the jacket and jerked back. “I hope to hell you got a plan in mind.” He nodded toward the truck. “That’s my family in there, and if anything happens to any of ‘em, I’ll shove that fuckin’ bat down your goddam throat.” Negan’s bright, white smile went wide, and he clucked his tongue.

“Carol like it when you go all cave-man like that? I gotta be honest. I’m a little turned on myself.” Daryl let go of his coat and shoved him toward the truck, getting a laugh out of him.

“You got extra gas in this ride?”

“Yeah,” Daryl said slowly. “Why?” Negan shook his head and sighed.

“This is gonna be fun.”

Daryl followed Negan’s lead, heading around to the shed out back of the house. They knocked in the rickety door, finding a half-full gas can next to a lawn mower. Negan picked it up and shrugged a shoulder.

“Well, I was hoping for more, but this’ll have to do. You got a lighter on you?” Daryl fished into his pocket and came up with a lighter. “Thanks. Get in the car. Hope you’ve got a lead foot.” Daryl caught Negan’s stare and realized exactly what he had in mind. As Negan stepped out of the shed, a pair of bolt cutters caught Daryl’s eye.

“Hey, wait. You’re gonna need these to get that chain. We busted it, but I got it rigged so nobody’s getting’ in.”

“Smart,” Negan said with a nod. “You and Merle aren’t a thing alike except you both have a goddamn knack for thinking on your feet.” Negan grabbed the bolt cutters and started for the gate, while Daryl got in the driver’s seat of the truck.

“What’s he doing?” Carol asked, keeping her arms around Lydia, who was shaking like a leaf.

“Get your belt on,” he urged, buckling up his own belt. Carol quickly tugged her belt across her and helped Lydia with hers, while Sophia did up her own, her eyes wide with worry. “Don’t worry. This is gonna work.” He kept his eyes trained on Negan, who cut through the rigged-up chain before slowing gasoline over the walkers reaching through the gate, stumbling and squishing through the rotted remains of the walkers that fell before them. Just before Negan turned away, he lit the lighter Daryl had given him, lighting up the gasoline-soaked shirt of the closest walker, and as the flames spread quickly, he slipped the lighter into his pocket and turned back to the truck. He slid into the passenger’s seat and propped his bat between his legs as he buckled his belt.

“Not gonna lie. That was fucking awesome.” He took a deep breath, slicked his hands through his hair and slammed his hand down on the dashboard. “Hit it, Daryl.”

Daryl cast one glance back at Carol who have him an encouraging nod, and when he hit the gas, the truck lurched toward the gates, slamming into them at full force and sending them flying back as the tires spun through walker muck. The squeal of flesh and bone against rubber tire was blood-curdling, but it was over in moments, and Daryl took a hard turn onto the road in the direction the other vehicle had sped off in. He cast one last glance into the mirror. The last thing he saw before a hill obscured his view was a dozen walkers engulfed in flames, slowly marching toward them with a massive hoard right on their heels.


	52. Chapter 52

Fifty-Two

The reunion with the rest of the group was brief, because another herd of walkers drawn by the commotion had started out from the tree line. Quick hugs were passed around before everyone packed up, piled into the few vehicles they had left and hurried on down the road.

Carol was feeling downright lousy by the time they made their first pitstop to talk tactics. They were at a travel center that Daryl, Negan and Merle had just gone in to clear. There had been three walkers inside, and now that they were taken care of, they were taking turns going in two at a time to use the bathroom and look for food.

Carol took Lydia and Sophia in, and while the girls were in the bathroom, she managed to find a box of stale crackers pushed way back on a bottom shelf. She snatched those up just as the girls came out of the bathroom, and she led them back to the car. She was feeling worse by the time she settled down in the back of the vehicle. Daryl and Negan glanced over from where they were talking with Merle and Rick, and Daryl gave her a little nod. She offered a weak smile, and he turned to break from the group and check on her.

“You doin’ ok?” he asked, leaning against the car door, peering in.

“Just a little nauseous,” she admitted. “I found crackers.”

“You want me to have Siddiq come check you out?”

“No. No, I’m fine. Nothing a little rest won’t cure.” The vehicle jolted as Carl and Duane rushed over, nearly barreling into the vehicle like a couple of startled deer.

“Hey!” Daryl scolded. “Watch what the hell ya’ll are doin’. Carol ain’t feelin’ good.”

“Sorry,” Duane murmured, ducking his head.

“Sorry, Carol,” Carol grimaced. “We wanted to know if Sophia wanted to ride with us and my mom and dad.”

“Do you have room?” Sophia asked.

“Sure!” Carl nodded.

“Can I?” Sophia asked, eyes wide as she glanced hopefully at her mother.

“If it’s ok with Rick and Lori,” Carol said with a slow nod.

“It’s fine with me,” Lori chimed in, opening the door on the other side of the car. Lydia inched closer to Carol. “I thought I might ride with you for a little while if you’d like the company.” Carol smiled at her.

“I’d love the company.” Carol scooted over, and Lydia climbed over her to sit between her and the door. Lori scooted in, and Sophia hopped out to go join Carl and Duane. Once Lori was in the car and buckled in, she looked at Carol and reached into her bag to come up with a warm bottle of Sprite. “What’s this for?”

“It’s to go with the crackers I saw you smuggle out from the store.” Carol hesitated a moment before accepting the bottle. Daryl cleared his throat then and backed away from the vehicle to let the two talk. Lydia curled up next to Carol and closed her eyes, and Carol took a deep breath. “Sprite and crackers always helped me with morning sickness.”

“You know.”

“I suspected,” Lori said quietly. “You were wearing baggier clothes and everything. You were tired, sleeping in a lot. Then this morning when you all showed up at the house. I accidentally walked in on you and Daryl having a quiet moment in the kitchen. His hand was on your stomach, and that pretty much told me all I needed to know.”

“I was going to tell you,” Carol said quietly. “I just wasn’t sure how. With everything…”

“Hey,” Lori urged. “It’s ok. What happened was _awful_ , but I’m thrilled for you. You’ve kept it quiet all this time?” Carol nodded. “You must be so scared.”

“Terrified.”

“I know,” Lori murmured. “But you’re not alone. And I’ll help you however I can.” She blinked back tears and offered a brave smile. “You really didn’t have to keep it from me, you know?”

“I know,” Carol murmured. “I just wanted to give you a little time. And it never felt like the right time. It still doesn’t.” She shook her head. “I lay awake a lot at night, you know? When I’m not thinking about all the things that could go wrong, I’m asking myself how the hell am I going to do this? How do you take care of a baby when you’re not even sure where you’re going to sleep tomorrow?”

“We’ll find a place,” Lori said quietly.

“And then what? We wait for the next thing to go wrong? First it was the herd at the farm. Then the Whisperers. And who knows how many of them are out there? We could stay and fight and risk losing more people, or we can get the hell out of here, move on down the road and run into an even bigger problem.” Carol pinched the bridge of her nose. “Sorry. I’m just thinking out loud.”

“It’s ok. You’re not alone. We’re all exhausted.”

“Lori?” Rick came walking over with Daryl, and he ducked his head in the window. “You riding with Carol and Daryl?”

“Yeah, I was thinking about it.. You guys good?”

“Yeah, though you realize I’m stuck driving three teenagers around by myself, right? Carol, I don’t know if you’re aware, but my son and Duane are both sweet on Sophia.”

“I…had an inkling,” Carol chuckled. “If you’d rather Sophia ride alone with us, I’d be happy to…”

“Oh, Sophia ain’t the problem,” Rick snorted. “It’s Duane and Carl’s fighting for Sophia’s attention and always trying to one up the other. I might leave ‘em both by the side of the road before the day’s through.”

“Ah, young love,” Carol teased. “Good luck.”

“Yeah,” Rick grimaced, glancing pleadingly at his wife. “You sure you won’t reconsider?”

“The mighty Officer Grimes can’t handle three thirteen-year olds?” Lori asked with a grin.

“Please?” he asked.

“Ah, alright,” she sighed. “But you owe me.”

“Yes, ma’am.” He winked at her, and she pushed at his arm before he turned and took off toward the front of the line of cars. Carol glanced at Lori with a raised eyebrow.

“Things ok with you two?”

“We’re getting there,” Lori sighed. “It’s not perfect, but we’re trying.” Lori took Carol’s hand and gave it a squeeze. “You need anything?”

“I’m fine,” she promised. “Thank you.”

“That’s what friends are for. You were there for me through everything back at Claypool. I just want you to know I’d here for you, for whatever you need.”

“Thank you.” Carol pulled an arm around Lori and gave her a hug. Lori got out of the car and headed out after Rick, while Negan and Daryl slid into the front of the truck.

“You feelin’ ok to go?”

“I’m fine. Don’t worry about me. We need to get as far from that herd as we can before nightfall.” She nodded down the road where about a half mile down, the first few walkers could be seen stumbling down the hill. She glanced at Daryl. “What’s the plan?”

“Fightin’ ‘em ain’t worth it,” he said quietly. “Nobody wins that war. We already lost too much. Georgia’s a bust. We’re headin’ west.”

“West?” Carol asked. “West where?”

“We’re takin’ our chances. We’ll see what we see, find what we find. Just gotta hope we find a place to hunker down for a while. Can’t keep out on the road forever. Not with a bunch of kids and a little’n on the way.” Carol chewed her lower lip for a moment before nodding her head.

“West,” she said quietly. “New Mexico. Scorpions?” Daryl chuckled at that.

“Maybe. Guess we’ll find out when we get there, huh?” The cars ahead started up, and Daryl turned in his seat and started the engine.

“Why don’t you let me drive for a while?” Negan asked. Daryl eyed him and said nothing. “Oh, come on. I’ll go to sleep over here.”

“If you’re sleepin’, you ain’t talkin’,” Daryl said with a shrug, putting the truck into gear as Carol covered the grin on her face.

“Maybe I ought to go ride with Merle and Andrea. Your brother lets me drive.”

“My brother calls you ‘boss.’ We ain’t the same,” Daryl smirked and sighed and settled his ass down in the passenger’s seat for another long haul. Two minutes later, the caravan was back out on the road, leaving the herd and the Whisperers in the slushy, red Georgia mud.


	53. Chapter 53

Fifty-Three

_Two months later_

When Sophia was three, she nearly gave her mother a heart attack by sneaking quietly into the room and tiptoeing to Carol’s side of the bed. She stood there, ever so quiet, and put her face just an inch from her mother’s. Carol felt warm breath against her cheek, opened her eyes and would have screamed had it not been for Ed sleeping soundly beside her. She remembered thinking how such a tiny child could give a grown woman such a fright. Kids could certainly be creepy without even trying.

On this morning, it wasn’t a warm breath against her cheek that woke her, but when Daryl’s child greeted her with knee to the bladder, she could sense someone or something inches from her face. Her eyes flew open to see Lydia standing there with her dark, messy hair in her face. She gasped and scooted back on the bed, sitting up and running her fingers through her hair. She looked around the small back room of the RV they’d stayed in the night before, and when she saw no sign of Daryl, she looked back at the little girl.

“Lydia? What’s wrong?”

“Bad dream,” the girl said quietly. Carol sighed and patted the bed. She shifted on the bed, rubbing the heavy swell of her belly as the baby moved again.

“You want to talk about it?”

“Can I sleep in your bed?”

“Sweetheart, it’s morning,” Carol said with a little grin. “We’ll be heading out soon.” Lydia sighed, her little shoulders slumping as she climbed up on the bed and rested her head on Carol’s belly. The baby was active this morning, and Lydia giggled when she felt the movement under her cheek.

“Can we stay _here_?”

“I’m afraid not. There’s no perimeter. We need some place behind walls, remember?” Lydia nodded, and Carol combed her fingers through the tangled, dark locks on the child’s head. “Your hair’s getting so long. You want me to cut it?”

“No!” Lydia protested.

“Okay, okay.” Carol held her hands up in surrender. “Where is everybody?” Lydia shrugged her shoulders, and Carol chuckled. “Alright. You lay here, and I’ll go see where everybody is, ok?” Lydia nodded, and Carol scooted off the bed, groaning softly as the baby kicked her again.

For as uncomfortable simple things like lying down and standing up were getting to be, and for as much as the baby moved around and generally seemed to stretch completely out and make her belly look like it was about to bust open, she treasured every second of it. Now that Daryl could feel the baby, he always slept with his hand on her belly, falling asleep most nights feeling his child moving under his hand.

Carol made a beeline to the tiny bathroom in the RV, and when she came out, Daryl and Merle looked up at her from the front of the RV. She suddenly felt very exposed considering she was wearing a shirt slightly too small, no bra and a pair of shorts that she honestly couldn’t even see over the swell of her belly. She crossed her arms in front of her chest, and she watched Daryl blush like he hadn’t seen her naked a hundred times before. He saw the dopey grin cross Merle’s face and shoved his arm.

“Easy now, baby brother. You forget I’ve got a pretty gal of my own sleepin’ in the next trailer.”

“Good morning, Merle,” Carol sighed, ducking back into the bathroom with her pack to quickly change into a fresh outfit. When she returned, brushing a comb through her disheveled locks, Merle grinned at her.

“Somethin’ about seein’ a beautiful woman all barefoot and pregnant just does somethin’ to me.” Daryl shoved Merle hard on the shoulder.

“That’s only slightly sexist,” Carol said with a roll of her eyes.

“Hey, I been tryin’ to talk Andrea into gettin’ knocked up, but she told me the only way she was having my baby was if hell froze over. I figure, the way this world turned out, I still might have a chance.”

“Andrea’s a lucky girl,” Carol deadpanned, getting a smirk out of Daryl.

“Well, I’m thinkin’ she might change her mind once we get settled,” Merle continued, completely missing Carol’s sarcasm by a long mile.

“So, what are you doing here so early?” she asked, changing the subject to something less irritating than Merle’s relationship woes. He was definitely a changed man, but he was pretty much clueless when it came to being with someone and all that entailed. He was clueless, but he was trying to learn, so she had to at least appreciate that he was trying in his own Merle way to make Andrea happy.

“Well, we was just talkin’,” Merle explained. “Way we figure, we’re just about fifteen miles outta Lubbock. Ought to be crossin’ the state line into New Mexico by sundown tonight, conditions permittin’.”

“Good,” Carol sighed. “Honestly, if this place had walls, I’d settle here in a heartbeat. I’m so damned tired of being on the road.”

“Yeah. We all are. Just ain’t found the right place yet.”

“That airport in Arkansas wasn’t bad until that tornado took the fence down,” Carol remembered. “Plenty of room for everybody. I think some place like this, or maybe even a trailer park at this point would be fine, so long as there’s fences.”

“We’ll find a place. Hell, I spent one summer drivin’ a semi clean out to California, and I can’t tell ya how many ranches I blew past out west where there was just cattle and fields for miles but no sign of a house. Way I figure, if we can find us a big ranch or somethin’ out there in the middle of nowhere, we can set up homestead, start workin’ the land. Hell, we might even be lucky enough to find some livestock out there.”

“We’ll find something,” Carol said with a nod. “We better before this one gets here. I don’t know about you two, but I’d rather not be traveling with a newborn crying every hour and giving us away to whatever or whoever’s in a mile radius.” She placed her hand on her belly and groaned when she got another kick to the bladder.

“You ok?” Daryl asked, crossing the room and putting his hand on her belly.

“I’m fine. Your kid’s active this morning.” She couldn’t help but smile when the silly grin perked up on his lips at the feeling of their baby moving. She never could tire of seeing Daryl Dixon, hunter, archer, woodsman reduced to putty over the feeling of his unborn child kicking up a storm.

“Oh, hey, I meant to tell ya’ll we went ahead and hooked up a small camper to your Jeep, Carol, and another one to Aaron and Jesus’ truck. Extra weight, but it gives us shelter for the night if we need it. Group already agreed, you get one of the beds to yourself,” Merle announced.

“I don’t want special treatment,” Carol insisted.

“Ain’t special treatment,” Daryl insisted. “You been sleepin’ sittin’ up in the car with two kids propped up beside ya most nights. You been hurtin’ a lot, but you don’t say nothin’. I see it though.” Carol sighed and Daryl gave her a pat on the belly before tilting her chin and pressing a kiss to her lips. She smiled against the brief kiss, and when she pulled back, she saw a blur of messy dark hair rush past.

“Uncle Merle!” Lydia jumped up, and Merle caught her in his good arm, bringing her up easily and chuckling as the girl gave him a big bear hug around the neck.

She was barely a shell of the little girl they’d found back in Georgia. For the first two weeks, she’d barely left Carol’s side, keeping close to her and to Sophia, and she’d slowly begun to trust Daryl. Every day, there was an improvement in her communication skills, and she was beginning to figure out how to talk about her feelings, though sometimes she just didn’t want to. Two weeks ago, she’d called Carol ‘mommy’ for the first time, and while it had caught Carol off guard, she hadn’t wanted to press the issue. She’d seen an almost worried look in the child’s eyes after she’d said it, but not making a big deal of it seemed to comfort Lydia. Three days later, Daryl got his first ‘daddy’ and that was that. Her saying it made it feel almost official. They were her parents. They were her family. The past was still a part of her, but they were her present and, hopefully, her future.

“How’s my favorite niece? Don’t tell Sophia I said that.” Lydia giggled. “You gonna ride with Uncle Merle today? I’ll teach ya how to spit.”

“Daddy already taught me,” Lydia pointed out, getting a grumpy frown from Merle in response.

“Hell, you ain’t learnt nothin’ ‘bout spittin’ ‘til you’ve learned from _me._ Remember, I’m older’n he is. I taught _him_ how to spit.” Carol rolled her eyes and put her hands on her hips in exasperation. The door swung open again and Sophia came rushing in, face flushed and eyes flashing around angrily.

“Why are boys so _stupid_?” she asked. Daryl took Lydia from Merle and tickled her before putting her back down.

“Lydia, did you brush your teeth yet?” Carol asked. The girl nodded, and Carol raised an eyebrow. “Are you lying?” Lydia nodded again. “March.” Lydia sighed and stomped off to the bathroom, while Carol turned to look back at her oldest. Merle put his arm around Sophia.

“How’s my favorite niece? Don’t tell Lydia I said that.” Sophia rolled her eyes and shrugged Merle’s arm off of her. “Alright, what’d the little fuckers do? Which one was it? Carl? Duane? I’ll kick both their scrawny asses.”

“Stop!” Sophia groaned.

“One of them say somethin’ to you? One of ‘em try somethin’ with you?” Daryl asked, suddenly puffing up at the idea of one of those little shitheads being, well, teenaged boys. “I’ll go talk to ‘em.” He started for the door.

“No!” Sophia shrieked. Daryl stopped and looked at Carol for help, and she sighed and looked skyward as if asking for strength to deal with an apocalypse, a pregnancy and a teenager at the same time. She took a deep breath as Sophia started toward the door.

“Sophia,” Carol urged, reaching for her daughter’s arm. Sophia stopped and looked at her mother as if she couldn’t possibly understand what it was like to be thirteen. “Let’s go get some air.” Sophia relented and let her mother lead her out of the RV and away from the unhelpful men.

“It’s nothing, Mom,” Sophia insisted, flipping her hair over her shoulder as they walked toward the Jeep. Carol waved to Jesus and Rosita who were loading supplies they’d looted from the other RVs into one of the vehicles.

“Well, it’s clearly _not_ nothing. You’re upset.”

“You wouldn’t understand.”

“I wouldn’t? I was thirteen before, remember?”

“Yeah, a _long_ time ago.” Carol huffed out a laugh.

“Well, humor your old mom. Let me see if I can _try_ to remember.” Sophia cringed.

“Okay. But you can’t get mad.”

“Why would I get mad?” Carol asked slowly, suddenly unsure if she wanted to hear what Sophia had to say.

“Mom!”

“Ok. Ok, I won’t get mad. I promise.” She held a hand over her heart. Sophia worried her bottom lip between her teeth for a long few seconds before letting out a breath.

“Carl and Duane are both mad at me.”

“Ok,” Carol said with a nod. “What happened?”

“Well,” Sophia said slowly, wincing as she fought up the courage to say the words, “Duane kissed me.”

“Oh,” Carol offered with the soberest, straightest face she could muster.

“Well, actually, I kissed him.” She gestured toward one of the old RVs up ahead. “We both just kinda kissed each other.” She blushed furiously. “And then…” She covered her face with her hands.

“You can tell me, honey.”

“It’s too embarrassing!” She huffed out. Carol reached out and took her daughter’s hand.

“You don’t have to tell me. But, Sophia, there’s nothing wrong with a kiss so long as it’s something _you_ want to do. If anybody _ever_ pressures you to do something you’re not ready for, that’s _not_ ok. Did he…” Carol cleared her throat. “You’re only thirteen. I think you’re too young to…”

“Mom! No! Ew. No, we were just kissing.”

“Okay. Okay, sorry.” Carol took a step back, relief washing over her that this horribly uncomfortable conversation wasn’t going to get more uncomfortable.

“He stuck his _tongue_ in my mouth.” Or, maybe it was going to get a tad more uncomfortable.

“Um, oh….okay.” Carol pinched the bridge of her nose for a moment, desperately trying not to be too freaked out or angry or upset about the ordeal, because she knew that if she did react that way, Sophia would probably never tell her anything again, and she wanted Sophia to be comfortable enough to ask questions and confide in her. She supposed she just wasn’t quite prepared for the fact that her little girl was not only noticing boys but kissing them now.

“Well, I told him not to do that, and he stopped.”

“Okay. Okay. That’s good. You told him to back off, and he did.”

“ _And_ he said he was sorry.”

“Good. You…you did the right thing, telling me. I’ll go talk to him, and…”

“Mom, _no!”_ Sophia hissed under her breath. “He’ll never talk to me again!” Carol sighed heavily.

“Okay. I won’t. I won’t say anything. But Sophia, I think you’re a little young to be kissing boys.” Sophia looked like she was going to cry for a moment, but she caught a glimpse of Carl, and the scowl returned. She turned her back and leaned against the Jeep.

“Well, don’t worry. I don’t think I’ll be kissing _anybody_ , because Carl kissed me last week, and he saw me and Duane kissing, so he got mad, and then Duane found out I kissed Carl, so he got mad, and now they’re both not talking to me, and _I’m_ mad.” Carol felt like her head was spinning for a moment as she struggled to keep up with Sophia’s story and emotions.

“I can’t tell you what to do, Sophia, but I know Carl and Duane both like you. It’s pretty clear.” Sophia groaned.

“Does _everybody_ think that?” Carol cleared her throat and leaned against the car with her daughter.

“It doesn’t matter what anybody thinks. What matters is what _you_ think. Do you like Duane?”

“Yeah,” she said with a blush and a smile. “And I like Carl. I _hate_ this.”

“Well, honey, you’re young. One day, you’ll know what your heart wants. You’ve got a _lot_ of growing up to do in the meantime, and so do they. Probably more than you do.” Sophia sighed and nodded her head.

“Things were better when we were just friends.”

“Then maybe you should tell them that. Tell them you just want to be friends right now.”

“They’ll never talk to me again,” Sophia groaned.

“Well, if you’re honest with them and they _still_ won’t talk to you, then they’re not very good friends, are they?” Sophia thought for a moment before wrapping her arms around her mom.

“Thanks,” Sophia said quietly.

“I didn’t do anything,” Carol said with a chuckle. Sophia grinned, and Lori came walking by.

“Morning. Sophia, you riding with us again today?”

“Mmm,” Sophia thought, “no, I think I’ll ride with my mom and Daryl today.”

“Alright. I found some great music though. You sure?”

“Yeah,” Sophia smiled, glancing at her mother. “I’m sure.”

_Author’s Note: I was in desperate need of a change of “scenery” and pace in this story. I hope you all enjoyed the family-centered chapter. Hope you’re still reading and enjoying! Feedback is very much appreciated. Thanks again!_


	54. Chapter 54

Fifty-Four

_Several months later_

Blood, sweat and tears. It was all Carol could really remember of those grueling hours, aside from Daryl sitting at her side with equal parts wonder and fear in his eyes. Giving birth in the middle of the desert in New Mexico wasn’t for everyone. While the home the group had found had been sprawling and comfortable, keeping the heat off wasn’t just a chore, it was a necessity. They were going to have to leave. It was plain as day. With no natural water source for miles or no shade trees to keep the sun off their backs and no air conditioning to cool them when the heat got to be almost unbearable, it was getting high time to move on. And that’s exactly what they’d been planning to do. They’d been packed up and ready to hit the road when something else hit Carol when she stepped out into dry heat. A contraction.

It all happened so fast that the memory of it made Carol a little dizzy. Lori and Andrea had swarmed her, helping her back inside. Lydia had gotten scared, wondering what exactly was going on with her mother, and it took a lot of effort from Uncle Merle and Aunt Andrea to calm her down.

Siddiq had taken her back to the room she and Daryl had shared, and all Carol could remember about getting back down in that bed was how incredibly calm she’d felt. For a pregnancy that had started out so uncertainly, especially with her expecting the worst, the majority of it had been pretty normal. She had had some aches and pains, and a couple of scares with pain, but other than that, she felt better than she ever remembered feeling with her previous pregnancies.

The birth was another story altogether. She’d focused so much into her thoughts as she lay there in pain with Siddiq checking her every few minutes and Daryl holding her hand. She’d thought about Sophia’s soft skin and tiny cry the first time she’d held her. She thought about the babies she never got to bring home. She thought about Sophia now and how proud she was of the young woman she was becoming. She thought of Lydia and how easy it had been to make room in her heart for another child. She loved that little girl as fiercely as she loved Sophia, and the idea of making a little more room for this little one only felt natural.

It was breech, Siddiq had announced somewhere in the midst of a painful contraction that found her squeezing Daryl’s hand like her life depended on it. There was more pain, and then Siddiq performed some sort of maneuver that Lori helped with. All she knew was that it felt like Siddiq had put his entire arm inside of her like a vet helping birth a calf, and Lori was pressing on her stomach, turning the baby until Siddiq told her to push again. And she’d pushed like she’d never pushed before, pushing herself until she felt she was the closest to death she’d ever come, and all the while, Daryl sat at her side, wiping the sweat from her brow, whispering words of encouragement that she couldn’t remember. She only remembered the look in his eyes and feeling terrified that she might die, and he might be left alone to the baby and Lydia and Sophia, and it didn’t seem fair. They’d both been through immeasurable pain, and this was the good they both needed. This was another leap into the unknown. This was hope. This was love. This was family. This was everything.

And then the pain ebbed, and a mighty cry rose from somewhere between her legs. Lori’s eyes went wide, Daryl looked like he might keel over, and Siddiq looked proud as he raised a tiny, squalling infant up and then down onto Carol’s chest. And then everything began to move so fast. The little red fingers with too-long newborn nails scratched against her pale, freckled flesh as Siddiq rubbed the towel vigorously against the baby’s back. Her legs still trembled from the birth. Her head was swimming. Her heart was racing. Yet, a sense of calm washed over her when she felt her baby’s heartbeat against her own.

“Look what we did,” she heard herself say as she gazed up at Daryl was an insurmountable feeling of adoration and love. He put his hand over hers on their baby’s back, and he wept. She pushed his hair from his eyes and chuckled when he leaned in to kiss her.

“He looks like his daddy,” Lori grinned, gently stroking the damp, light brown hair on the back of the baby’s head.

“Nah, look at him,” Daryl chuckled. “Look at them eyes. Looks like his mama."

Then he was taken from her, and the room cleared out before Siddiq brought him back, clean and sleeping, and Daryl helped Carol sit up and try to nurse, and even that went better than she’d imagined. He’d latched on right away, eating and making the cutest like noises like a hungry piglet.

He was perfect with his long fingers and long toes and a little birthmark that looked almost like an angel wing on his left shoulder blade.

And everything came back to those days not so long ago when their world had turned upside down with a fateful meeting in a dingy locker room on a night when there was equal parts hope and anxiety about the uncertain future. They’d come together, two lost souls, two broken people who had no idea what love was supposed to be, and somehow, they’d created this perfect little boy with his mama’s eyes and his daddy’s ears. They’d helped each other discover the best parts of themselves. And it all came down to this. This moment with their beautiful son suckling at his mother’s breast while his daddy stroked the bottom of his tiny, wrinkled foot in pure awe of being a part of creating something so perfect.

Whatever happened tomorrow didn’t seem to matter much right now. In this room, in this moment, it felt like nothing else mattered but this. Their boy, their daughters, their family. Tomorrow could wait.

The End


End file.
